Chapter Seven
Marley
The last time I was held while I cried was with Tex.
It’s funny how one person can see your tears as manipulation while another sees them for what they are…
pain. It’s also funny how one man can put your pain before his own, while another insists whatever he’s feeling about your feelings is more important.
I’ve learned that over the past eight years, the hard way.
The kettle whistles for a long damn time before we finally let go, and Tex pours the cup of chamomile for me. He carries it to the back room, sets it on the nightstand, gets me a shirt from his duffle bag, and offers me a few minutes to change.
Under normal circumstances, this would be weird. Hell, under these circumstances, this is weird. I’m in a cabin with my ex-boyfriend, and his big, cedar scented flannel is hanging past my knees.
I only broke up with Richard an hour ago. I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t be crying on Tex’s shoulder. Maybe I am a bad person. Maybe Richard was right to be angry.
Then again, maybe it doesn’t matter what Richard thinks at all. Maybe it matters what I think, what I want. Maybe it doesn’t matter what box I put his behavior into. Maybe it just matters that I was unhappy.
I drag in a deep breath and sit on the edge of the bed, thinking about the New Year’s Eve party down at the lodge that Kit was talking about.
It would be good for me to get out and do something fun for a change.
Something that doesn’t involve approval from Richard or a fix for the bookstore. Something for me.
I lean forward, thinking over my plans for the next week. I can’t stay here, but I can’t go back to Richard’s place either. I guess I could sleep in my office for a while… until that’s gone too.
Wow, this next year is starting out with a bang!
I lean back onto the bed until I’m lying flat and staring up at the ceiling. Tex must hear the creak because he’s knocking a second later.
“Yeah,” I say, trying not to sound as terrible as I feel. “The door’s open.”
He pauses for a long moment when he sees me, his dark gaze drawing over my frame before he swallows hard. “You want to be alone?”
“God no. My thoughts are like a prison right now. Ten more minutes and I’d have convinced myself that Grandpa Milton himself were here telling me to sell everything and turn over a new leaf.”
He laughs under his breath and settles his heavy weight on the creaking mattress next to me. “That bad, huh?”
I shrug, trying not to think about how masculine he smells.
“I’ve just got a lot on my mind between the store, and relationships, and…
I’m overwhelmed. Maybe it’s time the store closes, ya know?
Maybe it’s time that I let everything go and move on.
I mean, my grandpa wouldn’t want me stressed like this, and life is changing.
People are different now. They like shopping online in the comfort of their own home, and if I’m being honest, I’m exhausted, Tex.
” I turn toward him, tears rolling down my face.
“I’m so tired. I’m so… unbelievably tired. ”
He motions me in against his chest, and for a long while, we sit like this, his rough hand on my back, my heart full, my body feeling safer and warmer than it has since the second he left. “I feel you’re body being tired, honey. It’s okay. Rest. I’ll take care of everything.”
My eyes close to the sound of his deep, reassuring voice.
Somewhere thereafter, I must slip further down onto his lap because I feel his hands in my hair, soft and comforting, and soon my breathing gets heavier and heavier until I drift off into the deepest sleep I’ve had in a really long time.
_________
It’s still dark when I wake up and Tex is still beside me, still holding me, still fixing problems that aren’t his to fix.
“I missed you,” I whisper, the words escaping into the night as though maybe he won’t know they’re from me.
“I missed you more, honey.”
I rub the length of his leg beneath the sheet, and before I know what’s happened, I’m straddling his lap and leaning into his lips without an ounce of guilt.
Sure, I know it’s wrong for me to move on so quickly.
I know we should slow down. I also know that I’m raw and I’m not thinking straight, but that’s the thing about Christmas past. It makes you see things you haven’t seen in a really long time.
Things that feel good. Things that make me feel stupid for ever believing Richard was the answer to anything.
Things that make me feel safe, warm, and loved.
Tex wraps me in his arms and holds me close, our lips pressing together with pressure as he growls with possession straight into my mouth.
What the hell is happening?
“You’re so perfect. You know that?” He pulls away just long enough to say the things he’s always said and then he kisses me again.
He kisses me like he likes kissing me. Like he’s thought about it for years.
Like he’s wanted me for years. Like every second of every day of every year has led to this moment.
His cock pokes against my thigh, and I reach between us, unzip his jeans, tug my panties to the side, and scrub my soaking pussy against his hard shaft.
This is one thing I didn’t forget. His massive cock.
“Tell me you’re mine, honey. I want to hear you say it.”
“I’m yours,” I pant, grinding against his lap, his cock nearly sliding in multiple times. I consider letting it happen, but I know we both love the tease.
He leans forward, grips my tit in his massive hand, and scrubs his tongue over my nipples, suckling up with pressure as I cover the head of his cock with my soaking wet pussy.
“You’re so thick,” I whisper against the lobe of his ear as he nibbles my shoulder and tugs the rough tips of his fingers through my hair.
“Push down further, sweet girl. Come on. I need to feel you drain on my cock.” His voice is low and feral, desperate sounding.
I dip down further, letting his cock stretch me wider and wider until the thought of coming is unbearable.
My mouth hangs open, my heart beats hard, and when my eyes flash open to look into his again, all I see is darkness. Darkness and shadows from the light filtering in through the shades. Darkness and my soaking wet panties. Darkness and my head still flat on his lap.
I’ve been asleep on his lap. I’ve been asleep on his lap this whole time, and I’ve probably been moaning.
My chest tightens and I go perfectly still. Please dear God, tell me I haven’t been moaning.