16. Jules
JULES
“Whatcha got there?”
“Hmm?”
Skylar came over and sat down across from me. We were working the same shift at Danver’s and were taking a much-needed break. She motioned her hand over at the leatherbound book I was studying and asked, “What’s with the book?”
“Oh, it’s ah, it’s a journal Quinton gave me.”
“Like a diary?”
“Kind of. It’s to help me keep track of the things I learn about myself and the things I’m still trying to figure out.”
“I don’t get it.” Skylar was a few years younger than me. “What things are you still trying to figure out?”
“That’s just it. I don’t really know.”
“I am so lost.”
“Look. These are a few of the things I’ve learned so far.” I flipped the pages back, then turned it so she could see. “I like waffles and sausage links. I loved riding with Quinton on his motorcycle and had an amazing time at the beach. I even got to try crab legs.”
“Oh, now I get it. This is your ‘find yourself’ journal.”
“Yes!”
I thought back to the day Quinton had given me the journal.
He was quite proud of himself for thinking of it, and I was, too.
It was so unbelievably sweet of him. He’d already written down all the things we’d already done, and he wanted me to add a few things for us to try in the future.
I’d been sitting there thinking about it during my entire break, but so far, I hadn’t had any luck.
“That’s so cool.” Skylar sounded intrigued as she asked, “So, what’s next on the list?”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out.”
“Okay.” She sounded excited as she suggested, “How about skydiving or going to Paris.”
“I don’t know. I think those might be a bit of a stretch.”
“Really? They’d be so much fun.”
“Yeah, but I was thinking of something more like going to a winery and getting tipsy trying to find the wine I like best or reading until I find a genre I really like.”
“Reading? Ugh.” Her nose crinkled with disapproval. “That’s so boring. What about doing a triathlon or taking an Alaskan cruise? Or taking a ride in a hot air balloon?”
“Hmm... I could do a marathon or maybe learn to ride a horse?”
“Yeah, those would definitely work.” Her eyes lit up as she gasped, “Oh! You should try riding a mechanical bull!”
“Um, I don’t know.”
“I’ll do it with you! They have one down at Crazy Jake’s Saloon.”
“Okay. I’ll give it a try.” I jotted our ideas down in my journal, then slipped them into my bag. “My break’s almost over. I better get back out there.”
“I’ll be out in a minute.”
I put my bag back in my locker, then headed back out front.
The lunch rush was finally over, and things were finally settling down.
I checked in with Flynn and was pleased to see that I had two tables waiting for me.
I walked over to the first, and the air rushed from my lungs when I saw a familiar face staring back at me.
“James?”
I couldn’t believe my eyes.
He looked exactly the same.
His dirty-blonde hair was neatly combed over to the side, and his blue eyes matched his perfectly-ironed blue button-down.
It was a look I had grown accustomed to over the years, and seeing it again had all my old fears rushing back.
My throat tightened, my palms became sweaty, and I had to fight the urge to run.
His lips curled into a warm smile as he said, “Hello, Jules.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I was looking for you.”
“But how did you find me?” The words had barely left my mouth when I remembered my last conversation with MJ.
She’d warned me that James might have issues with the papers and come looking for me.
I’d hoped he would just sign them and move on, but clearly, that wasn’t the case.
I let out a breath as I muttered, “Damn. The papers.”
“Yeah. To say the least, I was surprised to get them. I wanted a chance to talk to you about them, so I went to the law firm that was listed on the papers. I hoped someone might tell me where you were, but no one was there. Thankfully, someone in town directed me to the orchard.”
“Yeah, thank goodness for that.”
He looked at me with his pouty, puppy-dog eyes as he said, “I can’t believe it. I thought I’d never find you.”
“If only I’d been so lucky.”
“Don’t be like that, Jules.” His brows furrowed with dejection. “You don’t know what I’ve been through these last three years.”
“What you’ve been through? Are you kidding me? I’ve been through hell and back because of you.” I stepped closer and lowered my voice so others couldn’t overhear. “You hurt me over and over again, and you made me believe I was the one at fault.”
“I know, and I’m sorry, baby. I know it was wrong, and if I could take it all back, I would.” He reached for my hand, but I quickly pulled it back. “I’m not the same man I was back then. I’ve changed. I’ve grown up. I know what it is to be a good man, and I want to be that for you.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my life.” He reached over and took my hand in his. “I know how good I had it, and I’ll do whatever it takes to get it back.”
“Get what back?”
“You... Our life together.” I couldn’t believe my ears. James was completely delusional if he thought I would ever go back to him, but he sounded sincere as he said, “We had a good thing, and I screwed it all up. I just want a chance to make it right.”
“There are no more chances, James. I’ve given you all the chances I’m willing to give.” I jerked my hand free as I told him, “What we had ended three years ago, and there’s no way in hell I’d ever...”
Before I could finish my thought, Flynn came up next to me and asked, “Is everything okay over here?”
“Yeah, everything’s fine.” I glared at James as I said, “He was just leaving.”
“But...”
“Just go, James,” I pushed. “There’s nothing else to say.”
“There’s plenty left to be said, but if you want me to go, I’ll go.” He grabbed his coat from the chair and stood. “It was good to see you, Jules. You look good. Real good.”
“Goodbye, James.”
He leaned over, and before I could stop him, he kissed me softly on the cheek. “Later, babe.”
Without saying anything more, he turned and started for the front door. My entire body shivered with disgust as I wiped the remnants of his mouth from my face. As soon as he was gone, Flynn placed his hand on my arm and asked, “You okay?”
“No, but I will be.”
“Who was that?”
“A ghost from my past.” I dropped my head into my hands as I muttered, “I can’t believe he came here.”
“Should I call Quinton?”
“No. I’ll call him after I check in with my other table.”
“Call him now,” he ordered. “I’ll take care of your table.”
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
“Thanks, Flynn.”
I rushed back to the staff break room and grabbed my phone from my locker.
I called Quinton’s number several times but didn’t get an answer.
I left him a message, then texted him several times.
As much as I wanted to wait for his response, I had to get back to work, so I put my phone back in my locker and headed back out front.
When I got over to my table, Flynn was just finishing up their orders. He handed me the ticket as he asked, “You good?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Did you get in touch with Q?”
“No, but I left him a message. He’s finishing up a big project with the guys, so I’m sure he’s busy. He’ll get back to me when he can.”
Flynn nodded, then said, “Let me know if he doesn’t.”
“Will do.”
I was an absolute nervous wreck as I headed to the kitchen and turned in my table’s order.
I needed to get a grip on my emotions, but my worst nightmare had come to the surface, and I had no idea what I was going to do about it.
For now, I simply had to keep my shit together and finish my shift.
After that, I’d give MJ a call and get her advice on what I should do.
By then, I hoped Quinton would be done with work and I would be able to talk to him as well.
I had no doubt that he would be just as upset as I was about James’s unexpected arrival.
I also had no doubt that he would make sure James didn’t do anything stupid, which helped ease my mind as I continued with my shift.
Thankfully, things picked up, and the early dinner rush helped distract me from the knot in my stomach.
When my shift was over, I grabbed my things from the break room, then started out back to my car.
I was eager to get out of there, so I didn’t even bother checking my phone before rushing out to my car.
I’d barely made it outside when Flynn called out to me. “Hey, Jules!”
I stopped and turned to face him. “Yeah?”
“Did you ever hear back from Q?”
“Not yet, but I’ll call him again when I get home.”
“I’m not sure that you should be leaving here until you’ve heard from him.”
“I’ll be fine. I’m going to go home and change, and then, I’ll head over to his house.”
“Good deal.” I could hear the concern in his voice as he said, “Just give me a call if you need anything. I’ll be around.”
“Thanks, Flynn. I really appreciate that.” I continued towards my car as I told him, “Have a good night!”
“You be careful, you hear?”
“I’m gonna try!”
I was feeling a little apprehensive as I pulled out of the parking lot and started home.
Seeing James had made it a nightmare of a day, and I had a gnawing feeling that the nightmare wasn’t over.
Maybe it was the fact that it was dark or simply the fact that I hadn’t heard from Quinton, but something just didn’t feel right.
I thought back to my conversation with James, and I was still astounded by how calm and soft-spoken he was. It wasn’t like him to be so rational. It made me wonder if he’d been honest about changing. I so wished I could believe him, but I was a firm believer in ‘a leopard never changes its spots’.
When I pulled up to my apartment, I was eager to get inside and put this day behind me, so I grabbed my things and rushed up to the door. I’d just put the key in the lock when I heard, “Jules? Is that you?”