18. Alek
ALEK
“Meet me out on the porch,” Nikolai says, lightning his morning cigarette to have with his coffee. He lifts a folder in the air. “Contract.”
My stomach dips with the impending doom of having to read over that contract. I don’t remember a word of it. If there is no way out for Mia, I will make sure her identity is erased. I’ll send her across the world where she’s safe, and she’ll never have to worry about my son again.
I’ll go with her. We’ll start over and build the life we always wanted. We’ll go anywhere, everywhere. If Mia wants to point at a map and pick a random spot, that’s where she will go.
Does she want an island?
Now, there’s an idea. An island just for us. Every day, I can see her in a bikini, soaking up the sun.
I need to pitch that idea. Da. Da. That needs to happen.
“I’ll be out there in a minute,” I reply in Russian.
He gives me a curt nod. “Okay.”
I hustle into the kitchen and pour Mia a cup of coffee, making it how she likes with way too much cream. Giving it a quick stir, I head up the stairs and peek my head into the bedroom, seeing if she’s awake first, but my sweet Mia is still asleep.
The room is dark, the curtains keeping out the morning sun.
“Mia,” I whisper, gently crawling on the bed.
I hold out the coffee mug, placing it right under her nose.
“Mia.” I wave my hand over the steam, wafting the aroma into her face in hopes she will wake up.
“Lyubimaya. It’s time to wake up.” I ghost my knuckles down her cheek, a feather-light touch that has her eyes fluttering open.
Those big brown sleepy eyes land on me and I feel my chest crack open, readying itself for her to reach down to snag my heart.
She’s so beautiful like this. Sleepy. A bit disoriented as if she doesn’t know where she’s at.
“Mia. Time to wake up. Nikolai is waiting for us on the porch to go over the agreement.”
She stretches, placing her arms above her head, reaching towards the headboard while her feet point down. Mia squeals from how good it feels. It might feel good but there is no way it’s as good as my view.
The blanket drops below her breasts, showcasing the love bites I placed there. All marked and claim. I lick my lips, wanting to have my way with her this morning.
“I’m sore,” she smiles, a tinge of pink pinching her cheeks.
I tuck her hair behind her ear and hold out the coffee. “Are you?” I try not to sound smug about it.
She giggles, a sound I can’t hear enough of. I might record it one day so I can play it back anytime I need my spirits lifted. It’s the sound of angels to me. A delicacy not all men get to enjoy or have. Only me.
“Don’t sound so cocky about it,” she teases, sitting up to take the mug from me.
She takes her first sip and I wait on pins and needles to see if I made her coffee the way she likes. I stare at her lips, her tongue flicking out to gather the lone drop.
Lucky.
I wanted to taste.
She sighs with a smile. “Perfect. How did you know how I like my coffee?”
“I’ve seen you make it enough times to know.” I kiss her cheek. “Come. Get dressed. Nikolai is waiting with the contract.”
And just like that, her smile is gone. All the joy that was in her face vanishes, replaced with worry and fear.
I take her free hand in mine and help her out of bed, then cup her jaw. “Don’t be afraid, Mia. Ivan will not ever touch you again. No matter what the contract says, you will never go back to him.”
Her throat moves as she swallows, the audible gulp solidifying the fact that she’s scared, and nothing will ease her mind until we go over that contract.
Knowing nothing I say will calm her nerves, I open the dresser drawers and pull out a fresh pair of sweatpants and a shirt. I dress her, tugging the shirt over her head and the dark green shirt falls to her knees. I suppose she doesn’t need sweatpants with how much the shirt covers.
I’m a very possessive man and not even her legs are allowed to be admired by my best friend. The world doesn’t deserve such beauty, and if I have to, I will hoard her and keep her to myself.
This world is unkind and cruel. I refuse for the darkness of it to ever touch her again. She’s too bright for the wrongs this universe cannot right.
She sits down on the edge of the bed, and I slip the sweatpants on her next. When she stands, she rolls to waistband, so the legs aren’t so long.
And somehow, she’s able to not spill one drop of coffee during me dressing her.
Impressive.
I can only convince Mia everything will be okay through actions. Words will never be enough and that’s okay. I’ll spend the rest of my life proving she is safe through actions alone. Words are meaningless without actions to back them, and I can understand why she feels that way.
Ivan took advantage of her. His words and actions were abusive. Years of trauma can never be erased. His memories will always be in her mind, but it’s up to me to heal them the best I can, and on her bad days where she feels like the trauma is creeping in again, I’ll be there.
I’ll always be here.
She follows me down the steps, one hand in mine while she holds the coffee cup in the other.
Once we’re outside, Nikolai is leaning against the rail, staring out into the forest.
“About time. I’m on my second cigarette.” He blows a cloud of smoke without even turning around. “I am bored.”
“You’ll live,” I bite with a little annoyance.
“Sorry, Nikolai—”
“Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong. He’s an ass.” I guide Mia to sit down on my lap and she follows without any protest, curling her body against mine.
“I am that. Da. Ignore me.” Nikolai spins around and takes a seat in the rocking chair, leaning forward to flip open the folder. “We’ll make this quick because I have dead bodies to deliver and any longer, the van will stink. Probably already does. I should have gone back last night,” he complains.
He hands me the folder, crossing his right leg over his left knee.
“I didn’t read it. I have no idea what it says.
Oh!” He digs into his pocket and pulls out a USB drive.
“I also moved it from your laptop to this. There’s no way he can gain access to it now unless there are more copies you didn’t tell me about.
” He narrows his eyes. “Did you forget?”
I open the folder, a sick wave tightening my stomach when the contract comes to view.
Reading this in front of her seems like a curse.
I close the folder when shame becomes a little too much for me to handle.
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I take a deep breath, wondering how the hell Mia could ever love me when everything she’s been through is my fault.
“What?” Nikolai and Mia ask at the same time.
I shake my head, lifting my finger for them to give me a moment.
“Mia,” I begin. “Are you sure you want to be here with me while I read this?” I don’t want her to be.
There’s a part of me that wants to order her into the house whether she likes it or not because of my ego, my pride, and my embarrassment can’t handle seeing proof of the kind of man I used to be.
“Yes,” she answers with pinched, confused eyebrows wrinkling her forehead. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“I am afraid you will no longer want to be with me,” I admit, clutching the folder in my hand so tight, the material wrinkles. My emotions shine through my eyes as I look at her, knowing I don’t deserve her love. “That isn’t an option for me, Mia. I need you.”
Her worry fades, a softening replacing it. Her hand touches my cheek and I lean into it, pressing my own hand against hers to feel more of her, to sink into her touch.
I am addicted.
“The contract doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not mad. I don’t hate you.”
“You should,” I whisper, kissing the inside of her wrist. “I’m not worthy of your love.” I hold up the folder. “Not when your father and I created this.”
“People change. If you mean for this contract to happen, you wouldn’t be here, hiding me in your secret cabin. It doesn’t matter what happened all those years ago. All that matters is now.”
Fuck. I love this woman.
I’ll die protecting her and I’ll kill to save her.
“Aw. So cute. So sweet. Perfect couple. Smooch. Smooch. I don’t have all day. Please read the contract so I don’t need to be with rotting corpses.” Nikolai ruins the moment.
As always.
I clear my throat and turn my head to him, narrowing my eyes at being interrupted. “You better be glad I care for your life, or you’d be dead.”
“I know. Why do you think I say what I do? I can get away with it.” He grins, smoke drifting through his teeth and lips.
Taking deep breath, I open the folder again, preparing to see what damaged I have caused.
It’s much shorter than I thought it was. It’s only four pages long and immediately I become angry at myself.
Four pages? Four? That is what is dictating Mia’s life?
“It’s okay,” Mia tries to reassure me.
There’s nothing she can say or do that can fix how horrible I feel right now. Would I feel this way if it were anyone else and not Mia? Would I be the cold hearted man I know myself to be or would I be twisted with guilt?
Sighing, I take the contract out and read it line by line. Mia and Nikolai wait in silence and the longer time passes without me saying anything, the more impatient both of them become.
The silence is filled with tension. So far, everything is reading pretty normal. I’m looking for any clauses that would opt either of them out of this arrangement.
“What is taking so long?” Nikolai groans, interrupting me like a fucking toddler.
I drag my eyes from the paper to him and he has his head tilted back, blowing smoke into the air.
Mia is being a good girl. She’s sipping her coffee and not rushing me. I don’t like to be rushed. I’ll take my time reading this, so I don’t miss a word. It’s important I take my time with one of the most important documents in Mia’s life.
In my fucking life.
“Shut the fuck up or I’ll kill you and send you to Ivan myself,” I speak in Russian, staying calm and collected.
“You won’t kill me,” he replies. “You like me too much.”