Chapter 18
Cara
Paolo Ferro and his men are gone, but my life is still chaos.
Just a quieter kind.
“Once we’re done here, we need to go to the bakery and decide what flavor cake we want. Then, we have an appointment with the florist later this afternoon,” I tell Dmitri as I lay on the exam table, waiting for Dr. Reeves to come in and discuss the ultrasound results.
Dmitri nods as he stands beside me. He’s barely left my side since we returned from Italy.
He told me that he wanted to be present for every appointment possible, whether it was a doctor’s appointment or wedding planning.
As excited as we are about the wedding, this appointment matters more.
“Most flavors are fine. But raspberries are where I draw the line,” he says with a grimace.
A soft laugh breaks from me as I take his hand and squeeze it. “No raspberries. I can easily agree with that.”
Dmitri leans down and presses a gentle kiss on my cheek. The man who terrifies half the city somehow turns soft whenever he looks at me. It’s yet another side to him that I love.
The door to the exam room finally swings open, and Dr. Reeves strides inside with my patient folder in her hand.
“Good morning,” she says with a polite smile as she pulls a rolling stool over to the ultrasound monitor.
“Are they both okay?” Dmitri asks immediately as Dr. Reeves spreads gel over my stomach and grabs the transducer. “Cara and the baby?”
“Everything looks great, Dad. I’d be happy to show you guys your son or daughter.”
Dmitri nods, holding my hand firmly as his intense gaze latches onto the monitor.
Dr. Reeves rests the transducer on my stomach and moves it around until the small shape of our baby comes into view on the screen. “There’s your little one. Strong heartbeat.”
Dmitri draws in a deep breath through his nose, but as his body tenses, his face actually softens.
I really am pregnant.
There’s a tiny life growing inside me.
And even after everything that happened…our baby is still okay.
I look up at Dmitri, relief washing over me as Dr. Reeves goes over the baby’s measurements and other readings. Hearing that everything is in line with what it should be takes so much weight off my chest. I almost pushed off this appointment because I was afraid of what we would find out.
Even though the abuse wasn’t my fault, I know I would have blamed myself if anything had happened to the baby.
“I would put you at around ten weeks,” Dr. Reeves tells me before lifting the transducer off my stomach. “I’ll send you guys home with some pictures and video.”
The last ten weeks have been the craziest of my life. I can only hope that the rest of my pregnancy is fairly uneventful, but that’s about as realistic as getting a unicorn for a wedding gift.
“What should we do moving forward?” Dmitri asks her. “I want them both safe.”
I squeeze his hand until he looks at me. “I already have a list of all the vitamins that I need to take and all the food that I need to avoid.”
“Is there anything that I can do?” Dmitri says. “She has to carry so much on her own, I just want to be able to help somehow.”
A gentle ache envelops my heart. He’s done more for me than any other person on the planet, and he still doesn’t feel like he’s done enough.
Dr. Reeves smiles as she takes off her thin-framed glasses and tucks them into the pocket of her white coat.
“Cara needs to keep her stress levels down. She should rest, but she should also do some moderate exercise at least a few times a week. And she needs to stay well hydrated. I’m sure you can help her with those things. ”
Dmitri nods and places his hand over mine. “I will. After the florist appointment we’ll stop at the store and get whatever you need.”
Admittedly, I don’t mind all this spoiling. Just for a little while.
Once we wrap up at the doctor’s office, Dmitri walks me out to the parking lot, his hand resting on my lower back, as I look through the pictures that Dr. Reeves gave us. “How are you feeling?”
I laugh softly. “You’re being overly protective lately, even more so than normal.”
Dmitri’s serious expression doesn’t shift. “I almost lost you all over again in Italy. Which means I would’ve lost my child before ever meeting them.”
I sigh softly, realizing where all of this is coming from. It’s not just love. It’s fear.
“Actually… I almost lost you.”
Dmitri gives me a pointed look. “I just want you and the baby to stay safe, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen.”
I know that the doctor said I needed to watch my stress levels, but he is the one who needs to relax a little. Dmitri and his men are still searching everywhere they can for any clues as to who else questioned me in the farmhouse, but they haven’t come up with anything yet.
It’s put both Dmitri and my father on edge.
“As long as I’m with you, we’re safe,” I assure him as I wrap my arms around his neck, pressing the front of my body against his.
Dmitri forces himself to take a breath as his fingers splay out across my back. “I won’t relax until everyone who hurt you, or wants to hurt you, is gone.”
“That’s probably a long list, babe,” I tell him as I brush my fingertips along the side of his face, feeling the tension in his jaw.
“That’s why I’ve been so hard at work. All my men are doing everything they can to find out any information that could be relevant,” Dmitri replies before looking away from me as a black car with tinted windows pulls up next to us and parks. “Besides Mark.”
“You’ve basically turned the poor man into my chauffeur,” I say with a slightly pointed look. “Mark has better things to do than take me all over the city.”
“If something happens, I can trust him to protect you,” Dmitri tells me before opening the door to the backseat for me. “We need to go to Elodie’s, Mark.”
Mark glances over his shoulder at us. “That’s a bakery, right?”
“We have to pick out a flavor for the wedding cake,” I add as I put on my seatbelt.
“Just don’t get anything fruit flavored,” Mark mutters as he pulls out of the parking lot and onto the nearest street.
“Are you the one getting married?” Dmitri questions him.
Amusement flickers within me as I nudge him. “What? Do you want something fruit flavored? You said no to raspberries.”
Dmitri shrugs his shoulders. “Strawberry or lemon aren’t bad.”
I hold his arm as I lean against him, my heart warming. These are the moments that I’ve been wanting so badly for what feels like the entirety of our relationship. Simple, normal moments. Moments that we might not even remember in a few months, but they bring us even closer now.
I can only hope that we get to experience more normal moments than crazy ones.
When we arrive at the bakery, we’re quickly seated at a table to try a variety of different cake flavors. Dmitri picks up his fork and pauses, his eyes sweeping over the multiple little squares of different cakes neatly presented on a white platter.
“What do you want to try first?” he asks me.
“Classic chocolate with chocolate ganache,” I say before we both pierce the piece of cake with our forks. We take a bite at the same time, the corners of my mouth immediately turning up in delight. “You can’t go wrong with chocolate.”
“I do like the taste of that one,” Dmitri admits before narrowing his eyes thoughtfully. “It’s a little plain, though. I could buy you a whole chocolate cake right now if you want it, but this is our wedding cake. Maybe we should do something a little more…”
“Fancy,” I finish with a soft laugh. “I think you’re right. Let’s try the lemon cake with vanilla buttercream.”
Dmitri nods and separates a corner of the fluffy lemon cake. His nose immediately wrinkles in distaste once he takes a bite, and I have to press my hand to my mouth to stifle a laugh. “Not a big fan of lemon-flavored sweets.”
“I like it, but I don’t like it enough to put it in the running,” I say before reaching across the table and taking his hand. “We both have to love it.
Dmitri opens his mouth, but I lift a finger to stop him.
“And don’t say that you want whatever I love the most. I want us both to make these decisions for the wedding. The only thing you don’t get a vote in is the dress because it’s bad luck for you to see it before the wedding,” I tell him.
Dmitri smirks. “Whichever dress you choose, I know you’ll look beautiful.”
A light blush dances across my cheeks as I smile at him. There was a time when his downfall was my mission. Now, we’re picking the flavor of our wedding cake.
Looking back on all that we’ve overcome together nearly brings tears to my eyes, and the pregnancy hormones certainly don’t help me keep it together.
“Cara?”
I blink my eyes rapidly, realizing that they’re damp. “Sorry. I was just thinking about how much we’ve been through.”
Dmitri brushes his thumb over my knuckles. “My wicked little spy.”
My cheeks burn even hotter now as I playfully roll my eyes at him. “You’re not going to let me live that down, are you?”
“I’m glad your father hated me so much that he sent his only daughter to rip apart my life from the inside. If only he knew that he was giving me the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” Dmitri replies with an amused spark in his eyes.
“Now you and my father are allies,” I say with a raise of my eyebrow. “I didn’t see that coming. I didn’t see any of this coming.”
“That’s life for you. One big surprise,” Dmitri replies before leaning closer to kiss my knuckles. “You and our baby are the best surprises of my life. I’ve never been happier.”
I give him a warm look before my smile slightly falters. “I just wish we could relax. It’s hard knowing that there are still people out there who want to hurt us.”
“We’ll always have enemies. I’m only wary of the ones crazy enough to try anything,” Dmitri tells me. “Whoever else hurt you is keeping themselves very well hidden, but no one can hide forever. We’ll find them and take care of them.”
By that, he probably means kill them and dump their bodies somewhere they’ll never be found. No one will catch me shedding any tears, though. Most nights, the nightmares still find me.
“I know you will,” I say as our eyes lock.
Dmitri holds my gaze for a few seconds before the tension drains from his face. “For now, we have another important task on our hands.”
The stress from everything else we’re dealing with in our lives falls away from my shoulders, leaving me feeling lighter as we smile at each other. He’s right. Finding the men who tortured me will take more time, but we can make this decision now.
We can throw an amazing wedding.
After sampling way too much cake, we finally decide on a mixture of classic, and delicious: white almond cake with almond buttercream icing. Most of our guests should like it as well.
“Is it basic that I want roses?” I ask him as we leave the bakery together, my hand on his arm.
Dmitri chuckles. “No, it’s not basic. Roses are beautiful.”
I can’t tell if he’s just saying that to appease me or not, but I am appreciative of his involvement in the planning. It feels like our wedding. Something we’re truly doing together. Unlike the previous wedding that was being planned for him.
He’s not just giving me something that he thinks I want. Granted, I believe with my whole heart that Dmitri will do whatever it takes to give me whatever I ask for, but I’m not Annika. I don’t care about fancy things or how much we spend to try and impress other people.
I just want him in every way that I can have him.
“White and red roses?” I suggest.
“Fitting,” Dmitri replies as we stop next to the car. When I raise my eyebrow in question, he brushes his fingertips along my cheek. “White for new beginnings. Red for love and passion.”
I hope that us starting a family truly does mean a new beginning for our lives, but we can’t move on from the darkness that we’ve been stuck in for months now. Not yet.
“You know your flower symbolism, Mr. Ivanov.”
Dmitri opens the back door for me, our eyes meeting. “I know a lot of things, Mrs. Ivanov.”
I playfully click my tongue at him. “Not yet.”
Before I can get in the backseat, he grabs my elbow and leans close to me, his lips nearly brushing my ear. “Milaya, you’ve been mine since the moment you stepped into my office.”
A shiver of pleasure races through me.
“Mark, can you please take us back by the penthouse,” I ask. “We have an hour and a half before the florist.”
Mark nods from the front seat as we climb inside the car.
“Any reason for this impromptu visit back home?” Dmitri murmurs to me.
I place my hand on his thigh, my fingertips creeping higher and higher. His curious expression shifts to one of realization, and he knows exactly what I want.