Thirteen
As I found my coat, I saw Jaxon through the side window by the front door. He was standing in front of his car and the bonnet was up. What now? Had Molly cut the fucking brakes or something to hijack our trip. Probably.
I was still smarting from what she’d said and knew I needed to have it out with him but I didn’t want to bring that bitch into our time together. Later that night at dinner I knew it was the intention to tell everyone, and therefore this was our last secret outing together and I needed it to be special.
As I approached the car, Jaxon was just dropping the bonnet. His hands were oily and he wiped them on a rag before turning towards me with a smile.
“Problem?” I questioned, gesturing to the car.
He shook his head. “Not at all. Justing checking the oil. You, OK?”
Stopping before him, I pulled my coat further around my body. It was a black belted raincoat and not the warmest.
My nose scrunched. “Yes, I’m fine. Why?”
Had he managed to notice that there was something wrong so quickly? I was certain I’d used my breezy voice.
Jaxon moved past me towards the boot of the Ranger Rover which was also open and threw the rag into the back.
“You’re just a bit pale,” he replied, slamming the boot, and opening the passenger door for me.
I smiled, now was not the time. Maybe I’d bring something up when we got to the sea. “I’m always pale.”
Jaxon gestured towards the car with a sweep of his arm, now Mr Chivalrous. “Good point. After you.”
I climbed into the car and he closed the door, watching me with a fond expression through the glass before he walked around and joined me .
On the journey, I was sorely tempted to tell Jaxon about Molly and her hissy fit and ask how she knew about the hotel but I chickened out. Jaxon was being so attentive. Considering we had spent such a long time at each other’s throats he was now just naturally easy to talk to. I didn’t want to spoil things.
We had an amazing time at the coast, walking along the beach together hand in hand. We even took our shoes off and I enjoyed the way the sand felt against my feet. It was breezy and there were only a handful of other people there, mainly dog walkers.
Jaxon kissed me as the waves crashed in the distance; the smell of the salty sea air made me feel so fresh.
“So, how did Molly take the news?
“She already had an idea. Heard me venting to Nixon on the phone,” he replied dryly, stoking back a hunk of hair which the wind had blown over my face.
“What about me?”
He scratched his chin thoughtfully. “Yeah, I was pissed off after that night at the hotel and then seeing you with dickhead. I told him about what happened in our room and what started off as an intention to comfort you, blew out of control pretty fucking quickly.”
I didn’t really digest his words fully at that point, and I raised my eyebrows. “Dickhead; you mean Dominic?”
Jaxon lowered his hand and shot me a look. “Nope. I mean dickhead,” he grumbled. “She also said she’d guessed by my dick behaviour towards you.”
His words surprised me. “Really, she said that?”
Jaxon nodded, staring down at me with a strange expression. “Yeah, I was a dick to her too when she and her mother joined the family. As I said, Wynter. I’ve been here before many times.”
“What do you mean you’ve been here before? Do you mean in the same position as we are in now? ”
“What? No. I mean with women and their offspring coming in and out of our lives. I’d had enough at wife three. When Dad met Daisy, I just thought here we go again. But after a couple of months of knowing her and then meeting you, I knew things were different. More cemented. It freaked me the fuck out and I didn’t want to let you in but you snook in there anyway. Got under my skin.”
“So, what about Molly?” I couldn’t help myself.
“What about her?” I liked that he didn’t say the word us.
“You said you were the same with her when you first met. You were a dick to her and then you weren’t. So did you get close like we’re close?”
“No, it wasn’t like that. It was still a strained relationship, but I could see how she affected my dad and gradually accepted her as a sister. I was younger then. We all were.”
He paused, briefly looking out at the ocean before turning back towards me. “Anyway, enough about Molly. Come here and that’s an order.”
Jaxon then tugged me into his arms. “Let’s go. The sooner we break the news, the sooner I can be inside you.”
*****
We returned home in time for dinner. I must admit, I was nervous. Once everyone was seated and Marcus had spooned out the casserole that my mother had attempted, Jaxon explained that we were seeing each other.
My mother and Marcus exchanged knowing looks, Chris didn’t look up from the text book he was reading and Molly sat there like a stuffed owl with a mouth full of food.
“We’ve known for a while darling. We may be old, but we’re not stupid,” my mother said, spooning some of her freshly made suspect brown goo into her mouth .
Jaxon and I shot each other a look and he shrugged. “Cool, that’s that then. I must admit, I thought you’d kick off.” He directed this at his father.
“The thought of you guys getting together was never far from my head and you’re both adults. You do what you want.”
Jaxon raised an eyebrow and shot me a saucy look, blatantly winding his father up who added, “Within reason son, whilst you’re living under my roof.”
Molly was painfully silent and I flicked her a glance as the discussion at the table changed to the usual chit-chat. Our revelation was now old news thank goodness.
Jaxon squeezed my knee under the table and delivered me a dazzling smile.
“I’m done, I think. Feel a bit sick. May I leave the table Daddy?” Molly suddenly said, her cutlery clattering onto her place. Why she still called him that when she lived with her real father was mind-boggling. Did she give them a number?
“Of course, love. No problem,” he replied and both he and Daisy stood to allow her past. Her shoulders were slumped and I suddenly felt sorry for her.
After our meal, I helped my mother stack the dishwasher and she said that she’d had suspicions after finding my necklace in Jaxon’s room. Whilst Marcus, Chris and Jaxon were sharing a beer, we sat at the kitchen counter and had a glass of wine.
My mother explained that my father had been charged and that there was now another order against him to protect us both. She said that he would go before a judge within the next few months.
I held her hand and listened to the story, feeling numb. As far as I was concerned, my father was Marcus.
After around an hour, Jaxon approached me and my mother and placed a kiss on my cheek, saying he would take a shower and then did I want to watch a movie with him .
I felt a bit nervous, as all eyes were upon us and Chris had a massive cheesy grin.
“You don’t have to peck her on the cheek, you can kiss her properly,” my other stepbrother said cheekily.
“Piss off pervert,” Jaxon huffed.
Daisy grinned and pushed herself off the stool, pacing over to her husband who did indeed plant a kiss on her lips.
“See, that’s how it’s done,” Chris commented with a smirk.
“Fuck me Chris, you need a girlfriend,” Jaxon bit back, shaking his head. And of course, I was working on that for him.
It was a strange atmosphere now it was all out in the open but I didn’t hate it.
Turning to Jaxon, I said I’d meet him in the living room. “We have to watch Bambi or ET though.”
My official boyfriend grinned as a silent message passed between us. “Ah cool, I love that movie. I’ll join you.” Chris said inviting himself.
Jaxon rolled his eyes and shot his brother a look. “Nope, not going to happen. We can do without the third wheel thanks.”
Chris exhaled noisily. “Great. I’m already being phased out. Either that or the dreaded gooseberry.”
As Chris went to move past us, Jaxon patted him on the back playfully. “If the cap fits bro.”
Daisy was still hugging her husband lovingly and Jaxon gave me a saucy wink before he headed out of the kitchen and upstairs.
The dishwasher had stopped its cycle and I moved to empty it, stopping my mother in her tracks. “Why don’t you and Marcus go and chill? I’ve got this.”
It was late and my mother liked her beauty sleep so they retired to bed and I unloaded the pots and put them away. So excited about having the chance to snuggle up with Jaxon with a movie and not have to pull away when someone came into the room .
We were now official and it was out there. For good.
I had been in the living room waiting for Jaxon for what felt like ages and so decided to pop to my room to grab my hoodie. The temperature had dropped and I still wore my camisole top, the cotton was thin.
I slowly made my way up the stairs, feeling so happy and guilt-free now our parents knew about us. As I rounded the corner and set off down the corridor toward my room, I heard voices coming from Jaxon’s room.
Moving towards his door, I placed my ear against the wood, straining to hear. The bathroom door was slightly open and from the steam, I could see he’d already showered. Who was he talking to?
I was just about to knock when I realised one of the voices was female. Pain sliced through my chest like an actual knife. OMG!
Without giving it another second, I curled my hand into a fist and pushed the door wide.
Everything went in slow motion and I found it difficult to register what I was seeing. Jaxon was standing over the bed in just a towel. Molly, fucking Molly Andrews, the girl he had not fucked so he’d said, was laying in front of him in lace knickers with her huge breasts on show.
They both turned as the door crashed into the wall and I thought I was going to be sick.
My mouth dropped open and I was stunned to the spot; like a rabbit in the headlights.
I blinked; shocked to the core by what I was seeing. Molly laid there, unclothed, her eyes on mine like an unwanted apparition. If she was surprised to see me, she didn’t show it. If anything, she looked triumphant.
Jaxon had lied to me, everything he said and promised, shattered in the air between us like the finest glass. The naked expanse of Molly’s long legs and her huge tits mocked me cruelly. She was enjoying wiping my nose in it .
My eyes did not lie. It all made sense now. Jaxon was sleeping with Molly behind my back. They’d set me up, oh how they must have been laughing at me. Silly little Wynter Hart, the pity fuck.
I choked back a sob, jamming my fist into my mouth to stop myself from screaming.
Everything in me split into a million pieces. I placed a wobbly hand on my chest, attempting to claw in a breath. Devastated didn’t even touch the sides.
That painful silence stretched like an endless cave as my face twisted to Jaxon. He was pale beneath his tan, his face betraying his guilt.
“Wynter,” he said in a ragged voice, taking a step forward, one hand on his towel, the other raised towards me.
I started to move slowly backwards, shaking my head. “Don’t touch me!” I yelled.
My mind raced as sordid images of the two of them together were triggered in my head. No wonder he had taken so long.
It felt like someone had stuck a pin in me. The hurt I felt at that moment was immense; like someone had reached into my chest and ripped out my heart. That someone, Molly fucking Andrews and Jaxon Bastard Savage.
I could taste the betrayal in the back of my throat and a wave of sickness hit me, forcing me into action. I had to remove myself from that situation and fast before I collapsed in a sad fucking heap. The thought of Jaxon showering to wipe the sex smell of Molly from his body made me sick to my stomach. Pain and horror was replaced by fury. I had never felt so volatile; anger, confusion and despair flooded my insides.
As I twisted away and set off on shaky legs down the corridor toward the stairs, I heard Jaxon swear savagely and shout my name. Molly’s high-pitched voice scratched over my skin like metal fingernails.
I almost fell down the stairs, stumbling into Daisy who was in the process of climbing them with a glass of water in her hand. “Wynter, are you OK?” she gasped, reaching out a hand to steady both herself and me. I gently pulled my arm away. I couldn’t deal with her just then.
“I’m going for a walk,” I shot out in an uneven voice and her brow plaited. I missed her following comment as I lunged for the door and ran from the house.
My feet crunched over the gravel, luckily the large gates into the driveway were open and I moved past them, upping my pace as I heard Daisy shouting my name from the doorway behind me. Her voice forced me faster; my feet drumming the ground as I ran across the road toward the farmland which sat opposite the house.
Blood rushed in my ears, it was dark and I lifted my body up and over the fence onto our distant neighbour's land; they sold turf and I ran across the newly planted strips, uncaring if I damaged anything. All I could think about was Jaxon and Molly and how I’d been such a fool.
Tears stung my eyes and a fine mist of water fluttered over my ankles as I raced past a sprinkler system which was watering the turf. I carried on moving in no direction when I heard Jaxon yell my name again. The sounds of his voice caused further hurt and humiliation to radiate through me.
I pushed on, running faster now, flicking off my sandals which were hindering my flight. My breath came from my body in harsh pants as I heard the thudding of feet against the ground. Jaxon was chasing me down. Before then, that thought would have sent a rush of excitement through me, but now there was only dread. My hands clenched into fists as I was grabbed by one arm and roughly swung around to face my betrayer.
Our chests crashed together as he grabbed my other arm, snapping my neck back to face him.
He was also out of breath, his hair still wet from the shower and although he’d pulled on sweatpants, his black shirt was open to the waist. God, he looked sexy. I fielded that observation away with the rest of my bad decisions. The main one, getting involved with this man in the first place .
He was furious which at that moment felt so misplaced. How dare he ?
His face was flushed. “Will you just stop for one second and listen to me,” he growled down into my misery. I attempted to yank away but his grip tightened.
“Let go of me! I hate you!” I screamed, tears running down my cheeks, burning my skin like acid.
His face contorted as he leaned down into me, his nostrils flaring. “It’s not what you think,” Jaxon began, his voice slightly calmer now that he had caught me. His gestures were wide and exaggerated as he waved an arm back toward the house.
“You don’t understand what you saw there.”
I struggled against his chest but he held me with one hand. “Really? I think it was pretty, fucking obvious.”
“You saw what she wanted you to see,” Jaxon growled.
I wanted to slap him but was helpless in his hold. “You’re a liar, get away from me.”
I pulled back, putting a slight distance between his hard bare chest and mine.
“For fucks sake Wynter, she set me up,” Jaxon snarled with his teeth bared, invading my personal space.
The laugh which was anything but burst between my lips. His words were sobering. “How stupid do you think I am?” I shot back in a tight voice, managing to get a hold of my semi-hysterics.
He dragged me up towards his face so we were nose to nose and blasted down at me hotly. “ Very at this moment in time.” He delivered those words with masculine impatience like he was talking to a petulant child.
Struggling again I shook my head back, my hair fluttering across my back which was now sticky from sweat. “I mean it Jaxon, get off me now!” I managed to speak slowly, injecting an element of steel calm.
The way his eyes drilled down into me was hard to take and he clutched me to him again. “No, not until you calm the hell down and listen to me. ”
“So, nothing happened with the semi-naked girl in your bedroom?” I returned tartly, my shoulders drooping in defeat. This caused his grip on my arms to loosen.
He looked sad suddenly, deflated and his thumbs started to caress the skin of my upper arms as he stated in a firm voice, “Yes, nothing happened. It was staged.” He dealt me with a searing look of indignation as if to say how dare you doubt me? How dare I indeed, considering what I’d just witnessed!
An unlikely fucking story. Was Molly clever enough to pull something like that off? I doubted it. Her timing was pretty darn perfect. A shiver went up my skin as he continued to stroke me with his thumbs. Like I was a pet, he was trying to reassure me. That thought sparked my temper again. “Well, she’s a perfect actress then. I should have known you’d do this to me,” I cried, the second part of my words said to myself.
“Come back to the house with me, I can prove nothing happened,” Jaxon explained, his eyes searching my face. Probably looking for a weak spot.
“You’ve had the chance to hide the evidence now. Where is she, under the bed? I imagine it’s something as tacky as that.”
I knew I was rambling and that at the back of my mind I was hoping and praying that I was wrong. I had trusted him with all my heart. I suddenly felt numb, a hollow pit of nothing in my stomach.
“Wynter, please. I swear to God, I’ve never touched her.” His words were determined but with a face that sinfully gorgeous, you wanted to forgive him anything. But things were different now, I had way too much self-respect.
Once he was convinced, I wouldn’t run, he released my arms and dashed his hands down his face.
“You told her about us, about what happened at the hotel,” I accused him. The hurt from that fact wrapped a fist around my heart.
“Did I fuck!” Jaxon ranted, totally in denial.
“You told her I was a pity fuck because of what happened with my father. ”
Jaxon took a step back, his face in absolute shock and I wanted to believe him but how could she have known?
“She’s fucking twisting things. I told you she heard me on the phone to Nixon and yes, I spoke about what happened with your father but I never called you a pity fuck,” he stated firmly. “She is a shit stirrer and can’t stand anyone else to be happy.”
“She’s always wanted you,” I pointed out, taking a step back so I wouldn’t have to strain my neck as much to see up into his faithless face.
He dropped his hands to his sides, shaking his head. “No, she hasn’t. She’s jealous of your close relationship with my father and wanted to fuck with you.”
“She hangs on your every word; she’s obsessed with you Jaxon.” Did he not see that?
Jaxon looked up into the sky and exhaled. It was long and drawn out like he was tired. He then lowered his head and levelled me a look. “So what? She’s never had me and she never will. I may humour her sometimes, but there is nothing in it.”
“So why was she in your room in just her knickers?”
“She wasn’t, initially.”
I folded my arms across my chest and looked at him with a stoney expression. “Go on,” I invited with a nod of my head. I would give him a chance to explain. My hands were clammy and I warded off the need to pace.
“I went in the shower and then when I got back to my room, she was just there. Laying on the bed. I was in the process of telling her to get dressed. To put her clothes on and get the fuck out of my room.”
“I want to believe you,” I croaked uncertainly, biting my lip.
“Believe me. I’ve never been with her, ever,” Jaxon promised in a tender voice as he ran his knuckles down one of my cheeks, taking some of the moisture away .
I dropped my arms and dragged my hands over my face, I felt numb and I needed to wake my thoughts up. “I’m confused, my head is all over the place. Seeing her there like that and the way you looked at me. You looked so guilty…” The last part left my mouth like vapour.
His jaw clenched and he held up his hands, his palms pointing upwards. “That wasn’t guilt. That was fucking shock . I was as confused as you were. I suppose when you opened the door, I panicked, knowing what it looked like.”
“But you just stood there, you didn’t try and deny it,” I blurted. A million thoughts rushed through me. Had I gotten it wrong?
He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “You didn’t give me the chance. You ran before I could say anything,” he replied through twisted lips.
I digested those words, releasing that I was almost hurt beyond repair.
“I think you’ve finally done it Jaxon,” I blurted sadly, dropping my eyes to the ground, staring at my feet in the new spiky grass of the turf we were standing on. My body trembled.
Jaxon lifted my chin back to face him. “What?”
“Broken me?” I informed him, my tone slightly questioning. I felt so unsure. The pain at the thought of them together had unravelled something inside me.
He released my chin, both his hands cradling my face, pushing his own into mine. “No. Fuck that. This is us, we’re tougher than this shit. It’s a misunderstanding . One that was orchestrated by that little bitch and believe me. I will force her to tell you the truth. Nothing happened. How could it, when I feel the way, I do about you? I would never hurt you.” Raw, determined power rolled off him in waves.
My nostrils flared at that one as I shot him a determined look. “Bullshit. You’ve spent the last two years doing exactly that.”
The night sat around us, the gentle breeze causing goosebumps on my skin. All you could hear was the tangle of our breaths and the noise of the air as it rustled the trees. Jaxon’s hands on my face felt amazing. I was angry with him but my body didn’t care. I jumped slightly as he leaned further forward and placed his forehead against mine. His voice was now a whisper. “I know and I’m sorry. I’ve been such a fucking idiot. I have behaved like a first-class prick and I will do everything I can to make it up to you.”
A bubble of hope surfaced in my chest as my eyes widened. Jaxon pulled his head off mine and stared down at me, waiting for my reply.
“Please Wynter. You have to believe me. I will do anything you ask.”
“You could start by not sleeping with your other stepsister,” I huffed.
“I didn’t sleep with her. How could I when I’m so fucking wrapped up in you? You’re all I think about.”
His next words almost floored me. “I love you, Wynter.”
That earlier feeling of hope surged to the point where I thought I’d explode and I blinked, wondering if I’d misheard him.
“What?” I questioned in a startled voice.
“Don’t let Molly sink our relationship before it’s even started. I fucking love you, Wynter. I’m in love with you. I know that now.”
“Really? You love me?” I still couldn’t believe it. It was too good to be true.
He cleared his throat and I noticed the catch in it. He was genuinely emotional. “I was determined not to allow you to hijack my life. You forced me to feel a vulnerability I haven’t felt since my mother died.”
“Since when? You say you love me, but…”
“I don’t know. Since forever? It feels that way now, but I don’t know when I realised it. That day at the pool maybe, when you rejected me.”
I suddenly had difficulty swallowing. “I didn’t reject you.”
“You slapped my face.”
I pushed a palm to my forehead. “You shocked me. And then you threw what had happened in my face with your comment about putting on a show and the frigid thing. I thought it was all an act. ”
“That was no act. You can’t fake chemistry like that. I lost myself in that moment. And I know you did too. You were with me all the way. I lashed out afterwards like I usually do, to try and distance myself from those feelings.”
“You love me?” I echoed, my eyes wide and my lips parting.
Jaxon planted small kisses across my cheeks. “Yes, so fucking much. And I’ll never do anything to hurt you again. You were a threat to my regimented existence. Turning my predictable life upside down. I walled myself off for a reason as I never thought I was capable of these types of feelings. I was torn between chasing you and letting you go. It was fucked up I know and I’m sorry.”
“But you were horrible to me from day one,” I pointed out, wrapping my arms around myself.
“Living with you and not having you has been the hardest thing I’ve had to face and being a shit to you, kept you at arm’s length. You made me question the life I wanted for myself. I didn’t believe in happy ever afters. I fought it but you got under my skin, Wynter, so much that you fucking owned me. I always said I would never let a woman own me like my father did.” His shoulders were slumped and I wanted to bury myself against his chest.
My eyes widened, briefly darting toward the house in the distance. “Why me though?”
He smiled and it lit up his entire face. “Why not you? You’re so beautiful and sweet with a smile so fucking contagious, pretending to remain untouched by you has been a nightmare.”
“So, you want us to be together; for real. Not just the fuck buddy thing.”
“You’re my girlfriend, my other half. We were never fuck buddies. I’ve always cared about you and over the last few months, those feelings became more intense. I wanted a future I never imagined, one with you. If you’ll still have me?” Jaxon asked, holding his breath .
I pushed my arms up and encircled his neck, my breasts against his chest stating in earnest, “You know I love you too, right?”
He smiled, his perfect white teeth glimmering in contrast with the darkness. “Now I do. I hoped, but I wasn’t sure after the way I’d treated you. I’ve been in pain and you’re my only cure.”
I licked my lips, trying to ease that dryness. “I feel the same way. You’re like a drug to me. Even when you were mean.”
“Making you cry was like one of my superpowers and I did get off on hurting you at first. Perverse I know. It was payback for making me have feelings like a sappy twat. You forced me to look at life and decide on what truly matters.”
I felt his hands in my hair as he tugged my head back and brought his hungry mouth down hard on mine.
As Jaxon’s tongue pushed into my mouth, I surged up onto my tiptoes and kissed him back with all my heart. His lips were gentle at first before he deepened the kiss, his hands on my face.
I gasped against his mouth as I felt a spray of cold water shoot over us and we both pulled away, surprised with smiles on our faces. More mist doused us from the water sprinkling system which had started to water the turf. The spray lifted in the breeze, soaking my camisole to my skin; my hair was plastered to my back.
As water dripped down our faces, Jaxon drew me into his arms once again, his hands dropping to my waist. I cradled his chin lovingly with my fingertips as he lowered his head and whispered, “I fucking love you Wynter Hart, and I always will.”
His mouth then crashed back on mine and we stood there, feasting on each other greedily as the water sprayed over us. Its coolness did nothing to decrease the temperature of our bodies or the sinful heat from that kiss.
I loved Jaxon with all my heart and I couldn’t wait for the adventure that awaited us. It would be wild, and unpredictable; there would be nothing straightforward about it or average. He made my blood boil in so many ways and the journey that lay ahead of us was unknown, unwritten; and I for one was looking forward to the ride.