Chapter 1 #2
I did know that. Still… leaving crushed something delicate in me.
Life here was good, better than good. I woke to my siblings’ laughter, saw my mother resting and smiling.
Everyone was thriving. I wanted to stay and help and see Fiona’s baby be born.
But Kaelric was fighting a war I knew almost nothing about.
It would be selfish to stay, no matter how angry I was.
He had given my family this life. If he needed me, I owed him.
I hugged Elia quickly and headed for the doorway, but the flowers I’d left on the small entry table were gone.
They were in my mother’s hands.
She stood there quietly, eyes soft with concern.
“I have to go. Kaelric needs me,” I told her.
She nodded. “The man on the porch told me.”
I swallowed thickly. “I’m sorry. I know it’s your birthday and—”
She crashed into me, wrapping me tight in her arms. “You’re a grown woman now, Brynn. You can go where you please, but a mother’s heart will never stop worrying for her children.”
I sank into her, clutching her close. “I’ll be safe,” I promised, though I wasn’t sure I believed it.
She pulled back, eyes shiny. “You’re all grown up.” Her voice was quiet, like she was just now realizing it.
“I love you. Happy birthday.”
She reached out and booped my nose like she had a thousand times when I was little. “Love you too, Bean.”
My throat tightened. I made my way through the house, saying quick goodbyes to the siblings who were awake. Then I stepped back out onto the porch, where Elia was speaking with Godric. She gave him a quick hug and then embraced me. She must know him from when he was the ruler in Kaelric’s place.
“I’ll make sure Kaelric sends word when you’ve reached him safely.” She told me, and I nodded, hugging her one last time. Going away on my mother’s birthday felt wrong, but I knew Elia loved my family like they were her own, and they’d be well cared for.
“Thank you for everything.” I squeezed her hands before she dipped back inside.
“There is one last person I need to see before we go,” I told Godric.
Leaving would devastate Cassian. We’d grown close these past three months.
He sent letters home to Aerlyn, which was spiraling toward civil war.
My killing Corvessa and the Dregs' burning had consequences that rippled outward.
His father was making a bid to be the next magistrate and had already survived one assassination attempt.
He told Cassian not to return until things stabilized.
So, Cassian stayed. He helped my people build houses, fetched water, tended to Fiona, and showed up whenever anyone needed him.
Beneath all his polish, he had a heart of gold.
I waved goodbye to Elia and Godric, and I headed down the long dirt drive, where gravel crunched beneath our boots.
At the very end, a horse was tied to a maple tree, a striking white mare with a silver mane and rich brown leather saddlebags.
“Procured for you, my lady. Her name is Star,” Godric said, eyes lingering briefly on Valkaryn at my waist.
I guessed we weren’t taking the train. Star was a pretty name.
“And where is yours?” I asked, peering around for another.
“I will travel in wolf form, my lady.”
Right. Okay.
I had ridden a horse several times around town over the last few months, but mounting was still… a challenge.
“My friend is nearby. We can go on foot.”
He nodded and followed as I cut across the park, through the morning bustle of vendors setting up stands, and across the street toward the small guesthouse where travelers lodged. Cassian had been living there and working the front desk.
Three nights a week, he joined my family for dinner. We’d become closer than I’d expected. He was kind, generous, and funny. A part of me feared I’d never be able to repay that sweetness.
When I reached the guest house, I saw him outside sweeping the porch. Seeing an Elite—no, the heir of House Draven—broom in hand like any other villager… it showed just how much things had changed. He didn’t need coin here, so he worked alongside the locals, and I respected him deeply for it.
“Hey!” He grinned when he saw me, but his grin faltered the instant his gaze slid to Godric lurking behind me like a sentinel.
“What’s going on?” Cassian asked, lowering the broom. His voice carried that quiet steadiness he always tried to maintain, but I caught the slight tremor beneath it. He wasn’t stupid. He knew something had shifted.
“Hey.” I pushed a few loose strands of hair from my face and glanced back at Godric, asking silently for space. He stopped several paces away and folded his arms behind his back, gaze scanning the tree line as if expecting an ambush.
“I’m going out of town for a bit,” I said.
Cassian raked his hand through his blond hair and blew out a sigh. “Kaelric?”
I nodded.
“Is it dangerous?” His brow creased, his blue eyes darting between me and Godric as though he could glean the truth from our body language.
I shrugged. “I don’t think Kaelric would put me in danger.”
Even as I said it, uncertainty coiled under my ribs. Not because of Kaelric, but because war was unpredictable. Unforgiving.
“Yeah, you’re probably right. Do you want me to go with you?
” he asked, almost too quickly. There was an eager flicker in his expression, something quiet and yearning.
Moments like these reminded me just how handsome he really was—the clean lines of his jaw, bright eyes, and a kindness that softened him.
But my heart wasn’t his. Every day, every night, one person haunted me: the broody wolfkin miles away. The one I’d hurt and still ached for.
“I think I need to do this alone, and I have Godric here to protect me.” I motioned toward the massive wolfkin whose presence screamed danger and devotion in equal measure.
Cassian took a step closer, palms up as if offering himself. I placed my hands in his because refusing felt cruel. I loved him, just not in a romantic way.
“I don’t want you to go,” he said. “What if you get hurt? Isn’t Kaelric on the war front?”
How could I explain to Cassian that being without Kaelric felt like breathing through half a lung? That the knowledge Kaelric needed me, still, burned through every ounce of restraint. I loved him with every thread of my being, even though he’d sworn he’d never forgive me.
“He needs me,” I said simply. “I need him,” I added, voice barely more than a whisper.
Cassian’s expression crumpled. He took a shaky breath, nodding as if forcing the truth to settle into his bones.
“So this would be a bad time to tell you that I’m in love with you?” he asked, painfully hopeful.
The words cracked something inside me. I pulled my hands back as gently as I could.
“Cass!” I hissed.
No, no, no. Why would he say that now? Our friendship had been so easy, so good. Now it felt like a glass pane had splintered between us.
“I’m sorry.” He dragged both hands over his face, expression twisting. “You’re completely lovable. Impossible not to fall for you, Brynn. You’re strong, smart, funny, gorgeous, a horrible cook—”
“Hey!” I snapped, even as heat flushed my cheeks.
Cassian let out a laugh, but sadness laced through it. “You told me all you could offer was friendship, but I had hope…”
My heart pinched. I’d let us become close. I let him see too much.
“Cassian, he’s my mate.”
Even if Kaelric was furious with me, had said he’d never forgive me, those truths didn’t change what he was to me. What I was to him. My heart wasn’t free. It hadn’t been from the moment he touched me beneath the starlit sky outside Aerlyn.
Cassian’s brows furrowed. “I don’t really know what that means. You’re human. Does it mean anything? How can it be?”
I wished I had those answers myself. “It means something to me. I love him, and I don’t have anything to give anyone else.”
Cassian swallowed hard, blinking fast as though trying to trap tears.
“Okay,” he said softly. “I just want you to be happy. And protected.”
Protected. My stomach twisted. I could only hope Kaelric had sent Godric because things weren’t as dire as they sounded.
But the letter he’d left me—cold and final—echoed in my memory.
He’d made it clear he would never trust me again, and trust was the soil where love planted roots. Without it, everything died.
“I’m sorry.” I reached out, giving his hand one last squeeze, a silent apology for never being able to give him what he deserved.
He squeezed back, managing a crooked smile. “It’s fine. I saw Mrs. Kinley checking me out yesterday. Maybe I’ll invite her over for dinner.”
A startled laugh burst out of me. Mrs. Kinley was in her sixties and wore more costume jewelry than a royal dowager.
“I’m hoping to make it back for Fiona’s delivery,” I said, sobering. “But if not, take care of her.”
He saluted with mock seriousness. “I’ll be the best uncle ever. I promise.”
I would miss him. More than I cared to admit. These last three months had been stitched together by Elia and Cassian, their friendship the balm that kept me walking when heartbreak threatened to swallow me.
I stepped forward and hugged him tight, burying my face in his shoulder. “If I have a mate, maybe you do, too. You’re such a great guy. One day you’re going to make some woman very, very happy.”
When I pulled back, his eyes were glassy.
“Be safe,” he murmured.
I nodded, throat tight, and turned from the porch. The parting felt heavier than it should have.
Godric waited at the edge of the property, silent as snowfall. I joined him, and we walked together in stillness, the world around us quiet except for the crunch of dirt beneath our feet.
When we were finally out of earshot, I glanced up at him.
“You heard all of that, didn’t you?”
His stoic face betrayed just enough emotion to answer for him. Embarrassment flooded me.
“Wolfkin hearing is very good,” he said. “Kaelric is lucky to have a loyal mate like you.”
Loyal mate.
I’d never considered myself that, not really.
But hearing it spoken aloud settled strangely warm inside me.
Back at the white mare, I slid my belongings into the saddlebag. After three failed attempts to mount her, each more awkward than the last, I huffed.
“I… could use some help,” I admitted.
Godric nodded once, stepped beside me, and lifted me by the waist as though I weighed nothing. I landed gracefully in the saddle, breath catching in surprise.
I laughed. “Thanks.”
He dipped his chin, then turned his gaze to my house. Something softened in his expression, quiet longing, maybe remembrance, as if he were saying goodbye.
“Have you been here before today?” I asked.
His eyes flicked to Valkaryn at my hip, then back to me. “I grew up here. Valkaryn was my little sister.”
The air punched out of my lungs.
This must be the man from Kaelric’s letter, the one who’d trained Val, the king’s third-in-command. Kaelric’s uncle. Did that make him…?
“Are you Elia’s dad?” I blurted.
A rare smile tugged at his lips. “I am not. She is my niece, though.”
No wonder she embraced him!
I brightened. “Do you want to stay the night? Spend more time with her and see the house? We could leave first thing in the morning.”
His expression tightened. “I would like that very much, but Kaelric needs you. It’s quite urgent, and I’m sure Elia would agree.”
My stomach dropped.
Urgent. Elia would agree.
“Let’s go,” I said, my voice barely steady.
With that, we turned east toward Loroc, toward war, toward Kaelric, with a growing pit in my stomach and Valkaryn thrumming with power at my hip.
The forest swallowed us, and home slipped quietly behind.