Chapter 12
LEAH
Itake a cup down from the cabinet and hand it to Suzie before getting one for myself.
I was entirely off coffee my first trimester. Now that I’ve started the second, it smells heavenly. If I’m only allowed one cup of coffee a day, I’m going to make it a good one.
“So how’s Eliza taking all this?” Suzie asks.
“Really well, actually. She’s excited to have a little brother or sister.”
“Listen, I know my reaction wasn’t exactly joyful when you first told me, but I swear to you I’m gonna love this one as much as I love Eliza. And I’ll always be there for you. All of you.” “I don’t know what I would do without you,” I say quietly to Suzie, and even I can hear the hitch in my voice.
“We’re family. Whether chosen or by blood, that’s what family does for each other.”
“Good family, anyway,” I add.
“Seriously, though, I’m right there with you, just like with Eliza. Or you, Eliza, and the baby can move in with me for a little while. We’ll share the night duties. Maybe we can even train Benji to throw away dirty diapers.”
We both laugh at the thought of that and how absurd it would be.
“Anyway, it actually seems like Viktor wants to be a part of the baby’s life.”
Suzie stares at me, then hustles me to the corner, away from any prying eyes or ears. When she speaks, it’s a heated whisper. “Are you sure?”
I’d called Suzie after the ultrasound to fill her in on everything that had happened with Viktor. She needs to know.
“It really seems like it, yes. What’s the worst that could happen? He has the baby every other weekend, and they have an armed escort?” I try to make a joke, but it falls flat.
Suzie’s mouth flattens until I can barely see her pink-painted lips. “If a kid needs an armed escort, they are not safe. Do you really want that?”
“I’m not sure I have a choice. Even if I stay away from Viktor, there are probably people who will be looking at me as a way to get to him. At least he can provide a kind of safety I can’t, if that’s the reality.”
Suzie doesn’t look happy about it, but she can’t deny the truth of my response.
“Besides, Viktor wants to be in his baby’s life. That’s way more than my dad or Eliza’s dad ever did. He has money, Suzie. You know how much.”
“Money isn’t everything.”
“Of course not. But who am I to deny him access to a baby if he wants to be a father? And who am I to keep the baby from its father, especially when its father could open up opportunities I can’t?”
“Their mother, that’s who,” Suzie reminds me, squeezing my hand again. “If you think that’s the safest option, then that’s what you do. But if not, we can figure something else out, okay?”
I nod and take a sip of my coffee since it’s finally cool enough. The sweet, mellow, chocolate and cinnamon flavor is a miracle on my tongue.
“Okay,” Suzie says and dumps out the rest of her coffee into the sink. She shrugs when I give her a questioning look. “I tried something new and didn’t like it. It was kind of gross.”
I giggle because Suzie sounds just like Eliza.
We chat on the way back to my office. It’s barely bigger than a closet, but at least it’s mine, courtesy of the fact that my mother helped start this firm, and her name is still included among the named partners in respect to her legacy.
“It’s a shame you got rid of all of Eliza’s baby things.”
“I needed the space when I moved in with Peter. I figured, if we have a kid, we could buy all new stuff.”
I stop short in my office doorway because there is an enormous bouquet on my desk. A small, oblong box sits next to it.
“What the hell?” Suzie is staring, too.
I approach the bouquet carefully, as though it’s going to bite me or explode, or maybe both. But I already know who it’s from. At least, I suspect. Who else would send me flowers like this?
“It’s one of the most incredible bouquets I’ve ever seen.” Suzie is inspecting the flowers with admiration; I can tell she’s impressed. I think Viktor just earned a few points in his favor with my best friend.
And the admiration goes up a few more points as I open the smaller box to reveal a necklace glittering with tiny diamonds that makes it look like it’s made of a million shimmering drops of water.
“Holy shit,” Suzie breathes, looking over my shoulder. I’m too stunned to get out any words at all.
A card rests on the velvet beside the necklace, and I nudge it open to read the brusque, angular writing:
Leah, I saw this and thought it would look beautiful on you when you accompany me to a gala in two weeks’ time. Please tell me you’ll come as my date. – Viktor
“Holy shit is right,” I finally manage, agreeing wholeheartedly with Suzie.
“I want to buy this property, Mom.”
“Are you sure?”
I’m not asking my daughter because I think it’s a bad choice.
She’s a Monopoly shark. I’m trying to get her to question herself so I can buy the property.
But it’s a no-go. She gives me that look, the one where she narrows her eyes and thins her lips, a look so much like my mother, and buys it anyway.
“Well, there goes that.”
I’m staring at the board, trying to figure out my next move, or if there even is a next move, when someone knocks on the door.
“Who is it?” Eliza whispers.
I shrug. “Not sure. Maybe it’s Jade?”
Eliza gives me that look again, because Jade is never that quiet or reserved, even when she knocks.
“We’ll see,” I tell her, getting to my feet to pad across the apartment so I can peer out the peephole.
I’m not entirely sure if I’m surprised when I see Viktor on the other side of the door, in his suit as always.
I feel Eliza come up behind me and peer around me as I open the front door. I smile at Viktor. “Hi. What are you doing here?”
From behind me, I hear Eliza whisper, “It’s you.”
I know she means the guy with the big car and the bodyguard, who hasn’t scared my kid one bit.
Viktor smiles, a soft, warm, sexy smile that makes my heart flutter.
“I hear there’s a food fair going on in the park,” Viktor says smoothly.
“I’m wondering if you two might want to go?
Unless you have somewhere else to be. I won’t take offense if you do, but I’m in the area, and I thought it might be fun. ”
His eyes meet mine. I have to take another deep breath as my heart skips a beat. His eyes slip down to my mouth and then lower to where the necklace he sent me sits around my neck. Do I imagine it when his eyes flicker for a moment? Is it out of surprise, or something else? I can’t tell.
I debated whether or not to put the necklace on at all. Putting it on is a message that I’m at least willing to entertain the idea of something between the two of us. I finally decided to wear it with the idea that, if it doesn’t work out, I can tell him no. That’s always an option.
At least, that’s what I keep telling myself.
Eliza emerges from behind me and clutches at my hand, pulling at it. “Mom, can we go? Please? I want some ice cream.”
I look out the window at the bright sunshine and the blue autumn sky and back at Viktor, who might possibly look hopeful. His expression hasn’t changed too much, so I could be imagining things.
“Okay, yeah. Sure. Let’s go. Why not?”
Eliza runs to get her jacket and her boots, and I do the same.
Iliya, of course, escorts us to the park and trails us around the food fair, which is more than just a few food trucks—it’s a full-on festival.
We wander as Eliza runs from booth to booth, taking whatever sample she can and crashing through piles of crinkly leaves.
The air is crisp, the breeze brisk, but it’s a beautiful day.
Hot apple cider and a doughnut make it a perfect day.
What makes it even better? The man strolling by my side. We aren’t holding hands, but I feel comfortable with him. He doesn’t mind when I talk endlessly.
Viktor listens like few have before, certainly none of the guys I’ve dated.
It’s like I have his full attention, and everything is focused on me and only me.
Not only that, but I’m almost painfully aware of his small gestures of interest; the way his hand brushes mine when he wants to show something to me, the way his hand hovers at the small of my back to guide me through the crowds.
He mirrors me and smiles that ghost of a smile that makes me think he’s enjoying himself, too.
Eliza keeps darting back to show us both something she’s found, or to ask Viktor to buy something else for her until I cut her off because she’s had so much sugar, she’s never going to be able to sleep.
Viktor is indulgent with her. Not in an obsequious way, like he’s trying to gain her approval, but in a way that speaks of someone trying to build a relationship with my daughter.
My only question is, what kind of relationship do I want them to have? What kind of relationship do I want us to have?
“Thank you for the necklace, by the way.” My fingers hover over a piece of jewelry sold at one of the craft booths, a handmade stone on a leather cord. The stone catches the light and glitters in a way that grabs and holds my eye. “You didn’t have to do that. It’s way too much.”
“It is a gift.” He says it like that’s an end to the conversation, the only reason I need. “I thought of you when I saw it. You are doing something wonderful.”
Was the necklace a gift because I’m pregnant? Because I’m carrying his child?
“I’m not even sure where I would wear it.
It’s not exactly something you would wear to the coffee shop.
” I laugh nervously, but cut the sound off when that sharp, blue-eyed gaze that seems to look through to my soul lands on me.
I can’t read Viktor’s expression, and I’m usually good at reading people.
Viktor takes my hand, his long fingers twining through mine as he studies the point of our connection, tracing the line of my thumb to my wrist with a light touch that makes me shiver. He has my full attention when he meets my gaze again.
“Tell me you’ll wear it to the gala. Come with me so I can show the world what you mean to me.”
I swallow, grasp for a reply, and find none. I want to ask what he means, ask him what I truly mean to him. Am I just the woman carrying his child? Or does he have feelings for me beyond that?
The question gets stuck in my throat, and instead, I force a smile I don’t feel.
“Of course, I’ll go with you,” I tell him. “I’d be happy to.”
A slow, pleased smile grows on Viktor’s face, and he kisses my hand and squeezes it before letting it go. “Good. Very good.”
“But I need to talk with you. To clear some things up. Tonight.” I blurt out the words as if my mother’s ghost is forcing me to confront the uncomfortable.
Viktor’s smile disappears, and for a heartbeat, I’m afraid he’s going to be angry. But then he nods. “Of course. I understand. I’ll be over at eight.”