Chapter 70
Chapter Seventy
Tori
I turn on my side, the morning sunlight warming my cheeks as my eyes flutter open.
A peace I haven’t felt in a long time lingers in the air, and I feel like I can breathe, truly breathe.
I stretch my arms and sit up, noticing it’s almost noon on my alarm clock, and panic sets in as I peek into the bassinet and see it empty, but when my eyes drift to the boots by the door, I remember that Noah is here, and my shoulders sag in relief.
I freshen up and glance in the mirror at my milk-stained tank top, my swollen breasts, which are screaming at me for a release, the dark circles under my eyes, and my limp hair that is in desperate need of a wash, but there is also something staring back at me that has been missing for a long time. A smile.
I exit the bathroom and go in search of Noah and our daughter, concerned that Faith will be due a feed.
Last night I expressed for the first time, and Noah gave her a bottle that she happily gulped down before her longest stretch of sleep.
She slept so contentedly beside our bed, but Noah didn’t take his eyes off her.
He stared at her until I begged him to get some rest. I can’t imagine the hell he has been through, and I know, when he’s ready, he will open up to me, but for now, he just wants to live in this blissful newborn bubble together.
Noah’s gentle voice floats through the space, and I slow my movements, and when my eyes lock on the view, my heart flutters.
Faith is strapped to his bare chest in the carrier as he sits on the floor in grey sweatpants, the baseball cap that says ‘in my girl dad era’ worn backwards on his head, building her crib.
I see her little eyes open as he’s talking to her like she’s hanging on every word he says, and a mixture of emotions zap through my body watching them bond.
“Uncle Harry said I couldn’t build this by myself, but we’ll show him.” I chuckle behind my hand.
“I think Mummy is spying on us, Faith,” Noah says, his tone playful.
“How did you know? I thought I was hiding well.” I tease as I approach.
“I’m trained to notice, darlin’.” He winks, and it sends tingles through my body.
“You got her in the carrier?”
“Sure did. I read in that baby book I took with me that skin to skin helps the bonding process.” And if my heart wasn’t already melting and my ovaries aching for baby number two with him, it sure as hell is now.
How did I get so lucky?
Faith sleeps soundly, curled up on Noah’s chest, looking like the most content little lady in the world.
I think she is the luckiest little girl to have a man like Noah as her dad, and I have never been more grateful and felt more at peace than in this moment.
We may not have gotten the beginning I craved, but we have the now and the future I have dreamed of.
I stare at Noah and Faith. Noah has a protective hand on her back at all times, and the other hand is looking through the keepsake box I made for my pregnancy, and I think I could stay lost in this moment forever. It feels normal, calm, and perfect.
I rest my head against his bicep and smile and point to the Polaroid photo.
“I took that one a few days before she was born. The little lady couldn’t wait, so I never got to take a 9-month photo.”
He smiles and then focuses on the next photo. It’s the one that Ria took as we cuddled up on the couch after Noah turned up. We both look exhausted, but it will forever be my favourite photo because it was the moment we became a family.
It’s crazy to think about everything that’s happened.
But I’d do it all again, all the heartbreak, all the pain, all the years I spent loving him silently.
I’d do it all again if this was what was waiting for me at the end.
Then it hits me, realization settling in.
Maybe that was the whole point. Maybe this is where I was always meant to end up.
Noah glances my way and gives me that megawatt smile that won me over right from the start.
“You okay, darlin’?”
“I was just thinking.”
“Oh yeah, care to share?” he asks, his eyebrow arching.
I place my hand over the one he has on Faith’s back and lock my eyes with his. “You know, you once said that if everything we’ve been through led to this, you’d do whatever you could to get it?”
His face softens as he breathes in my words.
“So would I. I’d go through it all if I knew that I got you and Faith at the end of it.”
Noah leans in, presses a chaste kiss to my lips before he murmurs two words that steal my breath and make my heart unsteady.
“Marry me?”
“What did you say?” I gasp.
“Marry me, Tori. This wasn’t how I planned to do it.
There was meant to be a ring and a big grand gesture, but I can’t wait another day.
My life flashed before my eyes on that deployment, and every part of it had you in it.
I’ve waited a lifetime to love you loudly, and I can’t wait a minute more.
No matter where I went, what country I was in, or how many years we were apart, every road I took has led me back to you.
So, please, marry me, darlin’, and spend forever with me? ”
I didn’t need to think about my answer; it was as simple and as easy as breathing.
“Yes.”