CHAPTER TWO
LIZ
“Miss Penny,” she starts, and I already open my mouth to stop her.
“Please, Liz is fine.” I want to say more.
Anything at all that will keep her from going on to tell me my sister’s wishes in the event she’s not here to pursue them for herself.
I’m barely grappling with the fact she’s not going to be here to see her dreams realized, her children grown. I’m not ready to find out the part I’m meant to play in the life she’s no longer here to live for herself.
All of it sits on the tip of my tongue, ready to spill out of me, when Jovi shifts again, bringing my attention back to where our legs touch, and my brain short circuits. Every thought eddying inside my mind stops.
“Liz,” Ryan says my name again. This time, I have no choice but to listen. “It’s my understanding your sister never discussed with you, her and Trent’s wishes regarding their two children, Remmi and Gavin.”
I nod and the weight of Jovi’s leg presses into mine with more intensity. There's no denying the gesture. A show of support between two people who really have no means of offering affection to one another. Mostly for lack of feeling any such feelings while in each other’s company. Most of the time.
In this moment, I’m shocked to realize I'm glad he’s here with me. He may be the only other person on earth who knew Lena and Trent like I did. Who feels the void of their absence the way I do. The way I will, every day, for the rest of my life.
“She wrote you a letter,” Ryan says, speaking to me like someone might a wild animal they don't want to startle. Dumbstruck, I watch her reach into her folder and retrieve a small, lavender envelope.
Of course, Lena would go out and buy some fancy letterhead for this occasion. The occasion of 'what if', and 'worst-case scenario'. She couldn’t have just taken a piece of printer paper and shoved it into a plain white envelope. No, she had to be all Lena about it.
Ryan slides the letter toward me. “I think it’ll help you understand their choices.”
“Do I read it now?” I don’t know if I want to. Part of me is desperate for my sister’s last words to me. The other part never wants to have to see them. Never wants this to be real.
“I think it might be best to read in private,” Ryan says, almost as if she understands the conflict twisting inside me.
“For now, why don’t I go over the will with you both.
” She has a unique talent for being both somber and smiling with a genuine kindness that makes all of this seem somehow less horrific.
“It was Lena and Trent’s request that you, Liz, become legal guardian to both of their children in the event that they weren't present to raise their children themselves.”
“What if I can’t?” I blurt the words out before I realize I’ve thought them.
Ryan looks startled by my outburst but not surprised by my doubts. “If you’re unable to take them, Trent’s parents would be their next choice.”
I nod. They’re the responsible choice. The choice Lena would have made if she’d thought for one second this moment would ever really come.
“Before you make any decisions, hear out their intentions,” she says in the same soft but serious tone she’s been using since she began getting down to business with us.
“Trent and Lena wanted you to be the one to raise their children. Hoped that you would to do so in their home. Thus, the house, everything in it, along with their other personal assets and bank accounts, are to be signed over to you in the interest of caring for Remmi and Gavin. Until both children have turned of age, at which point anything remaining would be turned over to them. In the event that you choose to sell the house, any profits made from the sale would be designated in the same manner.”
Lena didn’t have to leave that part in writing. I already planned to put the money from the house into an account for the kids and their futures.
“As for the business,” she turns to Jovi, “Trent has left everything to you.” She takes several pages out of her folder and flips them over before sliding them across the coffee table toward him.
“Here’s an itemized breakdown of all the assets, along with their current value.
Plus, you’ll find expenses and income on the last page.
” She waits, giving both of us time to digest this new information.
And it is new. One look at Jovi and I have a feeling I now know exactly what I looked like when he first told me Lena and Trent listed me as their children’s guardian.
“I don’t understand,” he says, frowning as he picks up the sheets of paper.
“What does he want me to do with it? Sell everything off?” He looks sick just saying it.
I get it. The only thing that makes the thought manageable for me is focusing on the big picture.
What it will mean for the kids down the road to come out of this shitshow of a childhood and start adulthood off with some opportunities that could turn things around for them.
Opportunities some money in the bank from selling their parents’ assets would afford them.
“Originally, that was certainly an option,” Ryan says slowly.
“What does that mean?” Jovi’s confusion spreads from his knitted brow down to his clenched jaws.
“A year ago, both of you could have taken over Serendipity Ranch and sold it, leaving the children with a proper inheritance for college or business or first homes, etc. But Trent’s business was expanding, and growth requires investment.”
Jovi looks like he’s starting to understand. “The new pole barn. And the indoor arena.” He shakes his head. “How much debt is there?”
“He borrowed against the house,” Ryan explains. “The value was there and Trent and Lena both agreed that the business would pay back what they took to build the new facilities. And I don’t doubt that it could.”
“If he were here to run it.” Jovi falls back into the sofa cushions, his hands raking through his thick hair, pulling strands from the tie holding it back.
“I haven’t worked horses since high school.
There’s no way I can step in where he stepped out and keep things going.
There’s no way.” He sits up straight again. “What are the options?”
Ryan sighs. “They’re not good. Unfortunately, without life insurance to offset the debt, it’s pretty simple. If you decide to give up the business, Liz loses the house. The kids lose any assets they might have had to secure their future.”
“What if we split up the property? Keep the house, sell the business,” he suggests.
“There’s a twenty-acre minimum on land parcels out here,” she explains. “You’ve got twenty-nine acres here. You can’t split it.”
“What if we sell it all?” I say quietly. “Pay off the loan. Get out from under it. What does that leave for the kids?”
“Realistically?” Ryan looks pained. “With the current shift in the housing market, you’ll be lucky to break even.
Trent was going big, and I don’t doubt that he would have turned it around and that it would have paid off, but to play big you risk big.
Now you’re stuck picking up mid play. You got all the risk, but the reward hasn’t come in yet. ”
“So…either we’re both all in…or…” Jovi never finishes his train of thought. He doesn’t need to. We all know where it’s headed.
“How much time do we have to decide?” I ask, wondering if any timeline will seem long enough to make this decision.
“There’s no set time,” Ryan says, laying out several more papers for us before packing her file back into her briefcase.
“There’s enough in the business account to cover costs for a month, maybe two.
Then you start to risk the bank deciding for you,” she goes on.
“As for the kids, I think we all know, the sooner the better. After what they’ve been through, they need to know there are still things, people, they can count on.
The sooner we remove them from this state of limbo, the faster they can regain some semblance of security. ”
She pauses once all of her belongings are put away and just watches us.
“I understand that it feels like a lot has been dropped in both your laps at the moment it feels as though your worlds are collapsing. But, as pressed for time as you may feel to make these life altering decisions, maybe you can find some comfort in knowing the people you would likely turn to for advice in this situation already offered their input. And unlike you, they felt they had all the time in the world to come to their conclusions.”
She doesn’t smile with her mouth, but the encouragement shows in her eyes. “Call me when you’ve settled on how to proceed, and I’ll see to it everything is taken care of the way you wish.”
“Thank you,” I mumble as I watch her get up to leave.
Jovi gets to his feet to walk her out. “I appreciate you taking the time to come out here to explain everything to us,” he says, opening the door for her. “I’ll let you know as soon as we figure things out.”
She nods, leans back one last time to wave in my direction, and then, she’s gone.
The door is closed.
The house is silent.
And I can almost pretend she was never here.
Almost.
Jovi, standing across the living room looking as wrecked as I feel, makes it impossible to commit to my denial.
The pain seeping from his dark brown eyes pierces the last remaining stich of armor I had guarding my heart.
Before I can bleed out in front of him, I lean into my one remaining coping mechanism. Morbid humor.
“They’re assholes,” I mutter.
He looks up at me, surprised. “Excuse me?”
“Trent and Lena,” I start again. “Total jerks.”
He starts to smirk, and I can't tell if I'm annoyed or comforted that he's amused. “Which part do you find more offensive? Them up and dying on us? Or their woefully poor choice to put us in charge of keeping their legacy alive?”