CHAPTER FOUR #2
“He’s right,” I tell her, hoping it’ll break her out of her stumped trance and get her out of my way. “I’m kind of an asshole. You really don’t want to bother with me.”
She scrunches up her nose, making the broad patch of freckles dance on her face. “I’ve heard.”
Well, that explains the lack of introductions.
“Always nice to know my reputation precedes me,” I mutter dryly, taking the initiative to walk around her since she still hasn’t budged from her spot.
“He’s serious about me, you know,” she says, loud enough to stop me right as I’m about to make my escape the same way Jovi did.
Fighting my desire to bolt, I turn back around to face her. “I can see that.” I use one hand to gesture at the surrounding walls. “You live together.”
For now.
Whether he ever finds the balls to kick her out or not, Jovi will be moving.
To come live with me.
God, it’s just one tragedy after the next.
“We do.” She nods, as of yet, oblivious to the twist of fate that awaits her. She takes a step toward me. Apparently, the torture portion of this evening hasn’t ended.
“Was that all?” I’m not about to tell Casey this, but she’s hardly the first insecure girl Jovi’s brought around who can’t tell the difference between a healthy mutual despising and sexual chemistry.
“Almost.” She takes another step. This girl has no concept of personal boundaries.
“I know you’re going through something pretty rough right now.
” A fucking understatement if I ever heard one.
“And that sometimes grief can make you do things you wouldn’t normally do.
Make you think you feel something, you really don’t. ”
“Uh-huh.” I swallow down the urge to laugh at her only because I’m afraid any outburst of emotion will end in my sobbing.
That even so much as a giggle would act as a segue to tears.
It’s not worth the risk. So I silently start counting to ten instead.
If I reach the end and she’s still talking, I’m calling Jovi back.
“I know Jovi’s the only person you have left now, and I would hate for you to risk the last relationship you have tying you to home over something stupid you’d only regret down the road.
” She reaches out and strokes my arm like I’m a freaking cat until she reaches my hand and gives it a little squeeze.
“So, if you need comfort or support of any kind through this terrible time, please consider coming to me instead of him. I realize we've never met before tonight, but if you’re important to my man, you’re important to me. ”
I snort. “I assure you, I’m not important to Jovi.”
I back up and take my damn hand with me.
“But since you’re worried, let me offer you some comfort,” I pause to cross my arms, just in case she has any more dumb ideas about touching me.
“I will die of a broken heart, drowning in grief, alone in the darkness before I ever even think of reaching out to your man. He’s no source of comfort to me.
If anything, he’s the last living, breathing reminder of what once was.
Worse, he’s the only piece of my past I ever wanted to be rid of. And now, he’s all I have left.”
I give her a second to respond. When all she does is stare back at me, mouth hanging open like a fish, I consider the matter settled and walk away.
I wander through the house alone for all of thirty seconds before I stumble upon the kitchen and find Jovi standing at the sink.
“Your girlfriend’s a psycho,” I mumble as I pass through. The kitchen is wide open, and I see another hall splitting off past the refrigerator. Since no one has offered to give me a tour of the place, I’m hoping the bedrooms are somewhere in that direction.
“Takes one to know one,” he mutters back, looking up from the box of Chinese takeout he’s been digging into.
He drops at least three noodles every time he tries to stuff his mouth with cold lo mein.
I’m starting to understand why he’s eating over the sink.
To make an already unpleasant sight still less appealing, he holds the carton out in my direction. “Want some?”
“As an avid lover and consumer of food, allow me to be the first to say, ew.” I scrunch my nose in disgust as he shovels another load of noodles into his mouth.
“As a professional provider of hospitality, allow me to be the first to say, your people skills need work,” he throws back, mouth overflowingly full.
“Also, you’re headed to the pantry and laundry room.
I keep my camping gear in there, so your sleeping needs could be met, but I’m guessing you’d still prefer not to spend the night in either one of those spaces. ”
I stop in my tracks, my arms flapping at my sides in frustration.
Slapping at my thighs is all I can do to keep from screaming.
I’m not usually one to lose my temper, but all things considered, I think I’d be well within my right to have a tantrum in the middle Jovi’s kitchen right now.
“Maybe instead of abandoning me in your foyer and leaving me to search for a bed on my own, you could perhaps nod or point or grunt—or fuck, throw a noodle—in the general direction of your guest room?”
He crumples the now empty box and tosses it in the trash a few feet over from where he’s standing. “First of all, I didn’t abandon you. I left you with Casey. And second, I kind of assumed she would show you to your room.”
“Why?” I retrace my steps until I’m about to pass him a second time and stop. “Do you not know where it is? Is that it? Not sure what’s behind all the extra doors in your mansion?”
“No, that’s not it,” he huffs, marching around me and toward the adjoining living room. He gets halfway across the open room before he notices I’m not following him. “Do you want a tour or not?”
I don’t answer. I do, however, start to walk in his direction. When he starts moving again, I make a point to keep back a few more feet than ordinarily necessary. I’m not scared of Casey, but the last thing I need in my life is more drama.
“Formal dining,” he grunts as he goes from room to room. “Fancy living room I never use.” He veers slightly left. “Hallway to the stairs.”
We take the hall for a few steps before the stairway comes into view, crawling the wall to the right of us, while the left is littered with more doors. “There’s a gym, a movie room and a half bath if you keep going.” He turns back over his shoulder, one hand on the banister. “Don’t keep going.”
“Why?” I have no plans to keep going. I simply resent being told not to.
“Because the toilet in the half bath can’t be flushed until I replace the lever, and the movie room only exists in theory right now. The space has been designated. The equipment is there. But nothing has been set up.”
There’s such structure in his movements as he takes one step after the next, I can’t help but wonder if he’s putting extra effort into the simple act of walking.
Kind of like I’m funneling all of my energy into arguing with him.
My brain doesn’t need to be on it one hundred percent, and yet, I’d rather it be all in on something trivial right now than let my mind wander.
“What’s wrong with the gym?” I hate gyms. If I want to go for a run, I want to run.
Feel the ground moving under my feet. Sink into the sensation of getting somewhere, even if it's to escape.
Nothing pisses me off more than picking up speed and colliding with the stupid bar across the front of the treadmill.
“Nothing.” He reaches the top and turns halfway, waiting for me to reach the landing as well. “It’s sacred. And I don’t want your shitty energy tainting it.”
I make a face. “My energy is excellent.”
“Your energy is judgmental and pessimistic. The gym is no place for a glass half empty, cracked and leaking, kind of attitude.”
“Wow.”
“I know. That’s how we all feel about it.” As soon as he says it, we both freeze up.
We.
Him. Trent. And Lena.
Neither of us acknowledges the slip. Instead, he turns left down the upstairs hall, which notably splits off to the right as well, probably to the master bedroom. No need to have a tour of that.
“Casey thinks grief may cause me to steal you away from her,” I change the topic all together. “So, you know, she’s probably not going to take it all too well when you tell her you’re moving out to come live with me for a year.”
He reaches a door, the very last door at the very end of the hall, and stops. Not that he had many options outside of stopping. Unless he wanted to run into the wall to amuse me. But making me laugh on purpose isn’t really his style.
“I don’t suppose you mentioned that while you were talking to her?” A sly look creeps in over his face.
And it suddenly dawns on me. “Oh my God! That’s why you left me with her. You were hoping she’d push my buttons so much I’d break up with her for you.”
He chuckles, twisting the handle to reveal my room at long last. “I like to be open to possible silver linings whenever I can. And let’s be real, Liz, we could do with a little favor from fate after today.”
“I’m pretty sure I would have been the one doing you the favor there.
” I step around him into the room. It’s huge.
With limited furniture. But there are double glass doors leading to a balcony surrounded by trees, a king-size bed already made, and an attached bathroom.
My needs are more than met. In fact, “I could do you that favor if you really want me to. Say the word and I’ll go cut her loose for you right now. ”
He grins, shaking his head as he backs out of the room, pulling the door toward the frame as he does. “Get some sleep, Liz. You’re being nice to me. Clearly, you’re delirious.”
“Night, Jovi.” I wait until the latch clicks into place. “And thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” It’s muffled. But undeniable.
JOVI
“She’s pretty,” Casey remarks when I come back to the kitchen and find her perched on my counter, eating ice cream from the carton. A habit I generally have no beef with, except she’s using my coffee spoon to do it. “You never said she was pretty.”
“Never said she was ugly either.” I shrug, planting myself at the end of the breakfast bar. I feel like I need the barrier to keep me from marching over to the silverware drawer and switching out her spoon. I may be particular about dumb things, but I’m not a dick.
“Kind of odd you never mentioned how beautiful she is.” Casey pokes around in her carton, giving it all her attention. It’s plain chocolate ice cream. There’s nothing in there worth digging around for.
I rest my elbows on the bar top and drop my face to my palms, rubbing my eyes. “Now she’s fucking beautiful? Jesus, Casey, why don’t you just spit out whatever it is you really mean to be saying?”
“I can’t,” she huffs, setting down her carton, tossing the spoon in the sink and placing the lid back on the ice cream. “If I say what I want to say, I’ll sound like a jerk.”
I stifle a groan, shake it off, and lift my head to look at her.
“Casey, I am exhausted. Please don’t make what is already a profoundly shitty time of my life more complicated.
You think Liz is beautiful? Great. Lots of people do.
Myself? I’ve always been a little too hung up on her controlling, insulting, and utterly unpleasant personality to notice.
And before you tell me it’s bullshit, please keep in mind, I’ve known her since she was sixteen.
She still had braces, her bangs were too thick, and she lived for black lipstick.
I guarantee you, we do not see the same woman when we’re looking at her. ”
She bites the corner of her mouth trying to hide a smile. Which might work if she were doing it in front of someone who doesn’t live with her. Fuck me. I have a live-in girlfriend. And fuck Liz for pointing it out. And while I’m at it, fuck Trent and Lena, too.
Casey slides off the counter, abandoning her ice cream and strolling over to meet me in a cat-like fashion. One arm slinks behind my neck as her body curls against mine. Any minute now, she’ll start purring.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I got so crazy,” she murmurs, resting her face in the nook of my neck.
Her hair tickles my chin, and I try to blow it away without her noticing.
“I guess it just freaked me out, seeing you walk in with her. I realize that you’ve known her forever, but watching the way you interact with her somehow made it all more real.
And suddenly, it felt like there was another woman in your life.
One who might know you better than I do.
Who might be closer to you than I am.” She uses her fingertip to start tracing circles over my chest. “And I want to be closest to you, Jovi.”
“I’m pretty sure you’ve got what you want then.” I place a kiss on top of her head. It’s probably not the closeness she’s looking for, but it’s all I have to offer anyone. And I’m giving it to her. “And for the record, the only closeness between me and Liz is a forced proximity.”
“Without Trent and Lena, I suppose you won’t have to worry about that anymore.”
My heart pauses, then returns to its rhythm. Not with a gentle beating, but a pounding I can feel vibrate through my entire body.
I should tell her how she couldn’t possibly be more wrong. But I don’t. She barely knew Trent and Lena. She has no business talking about them or what their absence will mean for me, or for Liz.
Casey interprets my silence as a positive thing. When she tilts her back to look up at me, she’s grinning again. “Bangs, huh? She so doesn’t have the face to pull those off.”
I roll my eyes and sigh while she giggles into my chest.
Liz’s face was never the issue. I hated her bangs because they covered her eyes. And her eyes were the only part of her I could ever make sense of.