46. Bailey
46
Bailey
Thursday
I hadn’t been prepared for the days that followed. Chase now lived with us, but he felt further away than ever. He never came out of his room, and when I knocked to see how he was doing, he would give a short reply and leave it at that. A couple times, he did text me, apologizing and just asking for more time, so I gave it to him. I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle.
Chase didn’t come to school. As predicted, he got a rough cough, but he stayed on top of his antibiotics—my mother made sure of it. She was the brave one that brought him food at the end of the night while I still gave him the space he asked for.
Coach drilled us pretty hard during practice. He didn’t know the exact reason Chase wasn’t there, just that he had pneumonia. It was the story all of us told anyone who asked. We didn’t have a lot of players to begin with, but being short Chase was different. Every scrimmage, I was getting creamed, since no one covered me like he did. My muscles hurt in places I didn’t even realize I had muscles.
Nolan texted me almost every evening, making sure I iced my shoulder after relaxing in a hot bath. I wasn’t looking forward to Friday's game. It seemed we were all feeling the loss before it even happened.
After school on Thursday, I climbed into the front passenger’s seat of my truck, watching as Lachlan approached. He took my hand and pulled me to the edge of the seat, so I was straddling his waist while he stood, leaning in the doorway. “You’ve been quiet this week,” Lachlan said as he drew closer. He slipped one hand behind my neck, massaging the tension out with confident fingers.
My chest deflated, and all this worry came up with the breath. “Chase has barely said two words to me. He doesn’t eat much. I think I’m starting to forget what he even looks like.”
It was a lie, wasn’t it? How could I forget Chase? His boyish charm that often hid the hooligan he really was. I didn’t think I could ever forget his stormy grey eyes. The number of times he’d looked at me in the halls all these years, the number of times I’d felt his gaze on me, and I’d ignored him in fear of Ed…I hated to think about the damage I must’ve done to him. The rejection he had felt, the loneliness we’d all felt.
Chase’s smile would forever be ingrained in my mind. I thought about that one special smile that meant there was always an adventure to be had, a plan to be made, an idea he was playing out in his mind, which would likely end very poorly, or very well… I didn’t think I would ever forget the feel of his lips on mine. Actually, I didn’t want to forget. Ever. I wanted to feel his lips every chance I got. I wanted to feel his body hard against mine whenever I wanted. I never, ever, wanted Chase to leave me, because what I couldn’t get out of my head the most…
What I couldn’t erase from every corner of my mind? “I still see him…blue,” I admitted. Lachlan’s fingers stopped massaging, and he squeezed just a little. “It was so quiet while you guys pulled him out of the pool. He was so quiet. And what if, Lachy, what if he never holds my hand again? What if I have to play tomorrow, and he's not there to hold my hand before the game? I don’t think I can do it…because all I will think about is how cold and blue his lips were.”
“Baby, don’t think that. He will be there, I promise. Look at me. Bailey, look at me.” My eyes fluttered up to his cool blues. They weren’t as soft as they normally were when he looked at me, but he also wasn’t giving me the cold look he gave everyone else. He was clearly battling something. “I promise he will be there. I will do anything for you, you believe that, right?”
I leaned my head against his. I did believe him. There was nothing Lachlan wouldn’t do for me, for any of us. “If he needs time, we have to give him time.”
“Come on.” His hands slid under my butt as he pulled me off the seat.
“Whoa, what are you doing?” I grabbed on to his shoulders.
“We’ve been working our asses off all week. We have a fairly high-profile game tomorrow. I say we relax a little.” He carried me to the back seat of my truck and sat me down. I couldn’t help the little grin that played at my lips as I moved to the middle seat.
Ethan closed the passenger door on his way around to the driver’s side, while Nolan slid into the seat on my other side. “We good?” Ethan asked.
“All set,” Lachlan said, and Ethan headed out of the school parking lot.
I had worn a skirt that day. Though it wasn’t a terribly short one—falling just slightly above the knees—it was the riskiest thing I’d worn since Ed had first drilled into my head how to be ladylike. I’d seen it in my closet and thought, why not?
“Let’s play a game.” Lachlan leaned in, whispering in my ear. “You tell me how far up to move my hand, and I obey you.” Then he placed his hand on my bare knee, just at the edge of my skirt.
My heart began to flutter, and heat rushed down low in my belly. Lachlan’s eyes danced with desire as he watched me, almost as if he knew all the emotions circling within me at this moment. He didn’t move, though. He waited.
I looked up at Nolan, who was sitting with his arm resting behind my headrest, watching, waiting. There was no sign of jealousy; there never had been with him. “Higher,” I said softly, my eyes still watching Nolan, whose gaze dipped to Lachlan’s hand sliding up my thigh at a tantalizing pace, his fingers brushing the sensitive skin. I could feel my skirt being pushed back, instead of his hand slipping under, giving Nolan a glimpse of my bare thigh. My eyes left Nolan and turned to Lachlan.
His pupils were blown now, in a way I was only used to seeing when he was stoned. Something about the thought that he was getting high off me caused a wetness to pool in my panties. One I wasn’t used to. “Higher.” My voice came out husky, breathless, as he slid those deft fingers higher still. I wasted no time. “Higher.”
A devilish grin spread across Lachlan’s lips at my eagerness, and he obeyed just as he’d promised to, his fingertips grazing the edge of my panty line. My breaths came out in pants, my insides clenching, and I knew I was soaking wet, all from those gentle touches on my thigh. Was that normal? Would he be turned off, was I doing this wrong? Without a doubt, I’d never felt anything like this with Ed.
I worried my bottom lip, almost unsure what to do, when Nolan took my chin, freeing my lip with his thumb. “I wish you would stop abusing this lip.” His voice was low as he leaned down. “Your lips are one of my favorite parts of you.” When Nolan’s lips met mine, I melted right there. His lips were so soft and sweet. He kissed me as if he was making it his mission to prove how much he adored and treasured my lips, and I was all for it, opening up and giving him all he asked for. When he pulled away slightly, I found myself chasing him. Nolan chuckled. “Bails, I believe Lachlan is waiting for a command.”
I was nervous, not because I didn’t want it, but because I was afraid of being wrong. Of doing this wrong, of doing something wrong. When I looked into Nolan’s eyes, seeing the heat and desire, I decided it was okay. With them, I was allowed to be wrong. I knew they wouldn’t care; they wouldn’t hurt me for it.
“Higher,” I whispered.
Lachlan’s finger slipped under my panties, and a soft gasp escaped me at the feel of his skin against the wet heat. Acting of their own accord, my hips chased his fingers. “Open your eyes,” Nolan said. I hadn’t realized I had closed them.
I opened my eyes to see him watching me, watching his friend as Lachlan ran his fingers down my folds, my breaths coming out in pants.
I let loose a moan in response as Lachlan slipped one finger inside of me. “Bailey, you’re so beautiful,” Nolan said, pressing a kiss to my temple. When Lachlan slipped the second finger in, stretching me, putting pressure as I ground into him, I grabbed Nolan’s arm.
I turned to Lachlan and hungrily captured his lips with mine, demanding a kiss without even thinking of asking for permission. He met my need with a need of his own. His lips were as possessive and claiming as his tongue.
I could feel something inside of me building. I grabbed the front of Lachlan’s shirt, pulling him impossibly closer, smashing my lips into his, and he seemed to know just what to do. His fingers were truly magic as they moved in me, coaxing something within me that felt so right, so primal. Nolan began nipping and suckling my throat, his hand slipping up my shirt, teasing my hard nipples through my bra. When he pinched my nipple, that was the tipping point for me.
My lips broke from Lachlan’s, and I fell back against the seat, panting in a very unladylike fashion as I rode Lachlan’s hand. As I grasped his shirt and Nolan’s arm. As Nolan’s teeth nipped at my sensitive skin. As his finger rolled and played with my nipple.
My eyes flashed up, meeting Ethan’s in the rearview mirror, and then I was seeing stars. The first orgasm I had ever had in my life was in the back seat of my truck, with three guys I trusted more than anything in the world.
The one guy who I’d believed I loved hadn’t been able to produce an ounce of the feelings I had for them in that moment. Everything about Ed was supposed to be right, but it had always felt wrong. No one could tell me this was wrong, because it felt so right.
Lachlan slipped his fingers from me, bringing them to his mouth as he sucked them clean. He smiled. “You taste amazing.”
I didn’t need to look in a mirror to know my cheeks were turning red. I could feel my face flush.
Nolan grinned. “Aw, you made her blush.”
Lachlan leaned down low to my ear. “Maybe, next time, I’ll get to eat you out.”
I couldn’t look either of them in the eye as he spoke those words, and Nolan chuckled low and softly. It was then that I realized Lachlan was straining against his pants. Nolan, too, needed a moment to adjust himself.
“Should I… Do you want me to…return the favor?” I felt awkward as hell asking like this. I had zero experience; Ed always just took from me.
“Keep smiling like this.” Lachlan pressed a kiss just behind my ear. “That’s all we need.”
Nolan threaded his fingers with mine, holding my hand. “How you doing up there, Eth?”
“Fine,” Ethan said in a gravelly voice that sent Lachlan and Nolan into fits of laughter.
I showered that night after barn chores and dinner, and on my way back from the bathroom, I paused outside the guest room. Chase’s room. I warred with myself for the longest time, not sure how much time was appropriate to give. Perhaps it was better to wait until he came to me? Would he come to me?
I made the decision to raise my hand and knock. There was a moment of silence before Chase called out, “Yes?” His voice was heavy with sleep, or boredom, it was hard to tell which.
Did that mean I could open the door? I wasn’t sure, but I did anyway. The room was dark, just a sliver of light from the hallway illuminating the mass on the bed, which I knew was Chase. His back was turned to me. “Just wanted to check in.”
“I’m fine. I finished all my schoolwork online.” I had offered to bring Chase his work, but his teachers were fine with sending it online. I’d given him my computer, so he could log on himself. He had nothing, except the clothes we’d managed to get from his place. Even then, Ethan lent him a hoodie.
“Tomorrow is Friday. We’re playing Easton Heights.”
“Coach won’t let me play. I’ve missed too much practice.” He let out a long breath. “Perhaps for the better.”
“We need you,” I said quickly. “I mean, practice has been brutal trying to fill your space. No one can seem to keep up with me like you do.”
Silence. How I hated the silence. How could someone be just a few feet in front of me but feel so far away?
I cleared my throat. “Anyway, I’m in my room if you want to hang out.”
Nothing.
Slowly, I moved back to close the door.
“Bails?” Chase finally spoke, his voice strained. “I’m sorry.”
I wasn’t sure what he was sorry for. I didn’t even think he knew what he was sorry for.