Thirty-Five
Asmodeus spectered us back to Blackdown Keep.
As soon as our feet touched the ebony floor, guards were on us at all times. They followed us through the halls of the Keep no more than a couple of paces behind. For what purpose, I was unsure since it was supposed to be the safest location in the Underworld.
The opulence and greatness of the palace didn't move me like it had the first time I visited. It still was the most beautiful place I'd ever seen but my thoughts were elsewhere. Every time I closed my eyes I'd see Mel looking at me with the unspoken horror she was feeling right before ...
I couldn't even let myself finish the thought.
Asmodeus escorted me through the halls of the Keep.
He kept a tight hold on my arms throughout.
I didn't even fight him on it and was actually grateful that someone was holding me upright.
I was afraid of what would happen when he did let me go.
Exhaustion was starting to grab a hold of me too.
I could feel it start to weigh heavily on me.
He led me to a small sitting room, close to where my room was he told me. He set me down on a large armchair in front of an already roaring fire and left. The corner of the room had a table with a television muted on a channel I didn't recognize.
I tried to distract myself by watching the fire. I didn't want to think about what happened - I couldn't face it, didn't want to.
Asmodeus set himself down on the chair opposite mine. He waved his hand and a tea-set appeared with two delicate teacups.
I recognized the chamomile as it wafted through the air around us. I watched his hands as he poured the large teapot into one of the small teacups. He slid the saucer and cup close for me to reach and watched me.
When I didn't move, he sighed. "It's not poisoned if that's what you're wondering."
I looked away to the fire. "I don't trust you."
He looked up past me to something or someone behind my chair. I briefly wondered how close the guards really were now that we were in the room. He leaned forward, whispering, "I'm not going to hurt you."
I shook my head. "I'd rather not."
His voice was impossibly low. "Was she your first kill?"
I tried to swallow my grief but felt the tears fall anyway. I only nodded unable to form words.
"It was self-defense," he whispered. "She would have killed you."
I shook my head fighting the exhaustion that was threatening to take over. "She just lunged for me with that knife - I had her life in my hand and just squeezed and -"
He was shaking his head. "You protected yourself." He nodded at the cup in front of me. "Drink the tea, it will help with your shaking."
I shook my head again and, frustrated, he poured himself a cup and began to drink from it. He raised his eyebrows. "Happy?"
I shook my head.
"Gods," he growled. "I need you. Alive. Why would I hurt you?"
I scoffed. "Because you're evil." I looked at his black eyes, unflinching. They were exactly as the first time I'd seen them. Empty, cold. Like I was staring into an abyss. "And you're not above being cruel to get your way. Those things you said about Damien were just despicable."
"Did it ever occur to you that you are not the only one to have lost him?"
I watched in surprise.
His eyebrows shot up. "No. It didn't, did it?
I was there the day he was born, when he took his first steps - I watched him as his father begged and bargained with the gods for Damien's mother to get better - to not have the Fever take her.
I was there when he found his father had died, I was at his coronation when he reluctantly took the throne.
Forgive me if I am not clinging to a false hope that he might be, after all of this, still be alive.
He wouldn't want me to. He'd want me to right the wrong and grant his body peace.
I am pissed that this prick is using his body - that he is so consumed at the thought of being King that he would destroy his nephew. "
My voice was barely above a whisper when I spoke again and I hated how it wavered. "How can you be so sure he's gone?"
I didn't turn from him even as he watched me with an intensity that should have made anyone shrink in terror. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. He was angry, I could see it consuming him as he watched me.
He was the one to break eye contact. He lifted his hand to the top of his dark and heavy tunic, unbuttoning the top.
"He always said you were stubborn," he growled.
He leaned back in his own chair, placing his left ankle over his right knee.
"About five years ago, Damien got into trouble.
Big trouble with the Summer Kingdom. He needed my help.
" He looked at me again. "I won't bore you with the specifics but we made a bargain.
When a bargain is made between faes, our magic -our very essence- is exchanged.
It's how I knew you were in danger tonight. "
I swallowed. The thought that I'd exchanged magic with Asmodeus that morning with our own bargain scared me. No wonder Julian had warned me about it.
"I haven't sensed Damien in weeks. He is dead."
Finally, I looked away and leaned back in my chair. Could he be telling the truth? Were the dreams that I was having be just that? Dreams?
I'd filled my head with thoughts of him, kept him alive in my heart ... but had nothing to show for it.
Could he really be gone?
I couldn't face it. Didn't want to.
Exhaustion hit me again. I was too tired.
I wanted to sleep and put everything behind me. Forget it all if only for a night.
I didn't want to think about what just happened on that balcony.
I didn't want to think that I wouldn't fall asleep by the fire as I had in the last couple of days safe with Julian in the next room or chair.
I didn't want to think of what Asmodeus had revealed -what made him believe that Damien was actually gone.
Neither of us spoke again for the rest of the night and before I knew it, I drifted into a dreamless sleep listening to the fire and burning log pop and crackle in front of us.
Heavy boots pounding on the floor startled me out of my sleep.
I inhaled deeply as I woke and glanced at my surroundings.
It looked to be early morning judging by the sunlight filtering through the windows.
I was still in the sitting room in the large black dress I had been in the night before.
The sleeves were still ripped from where I'd been stabbed, the blood dry.
When I turned back to where the noise came from I saw Damien come into the room with Asmodeus right behind.
Asmodeus at some point had left and dressed for the day.
Damien, on the other hand, had not changed.
In fact, it looked like he had been running through the night.
His hairline showed a pattern that indicated he had sweat some dirt off.
Mud seemed to be on him like another layer -it streaked his pale cheeks and neck, caked his clothes and hair.
The ornate clothes he had the night before were torn in different places with one of the sleeves barely attached to the shoulder.
As soon as his eyes met mine, he smiled.
"See?" Asmodeus said as if they were finishing a previous conversation. "She is here, safe."
Damien didn't look away from me. "You should have gone to bed. I didn't expect you to stay here all night."
I cleared my throat. "I must have passed out," I only said.
Damien spectered in front of me on a knee, startling me. His hand moved to my cheek.
I flinched.
It didn't go unnoticed. Instead of reaching for my face again, he took both my hands in his. His violet eyes watched my features as he spoke. "I've taken care of everything. No one will touch you again."
I swallowed. My eyes went over his torn clothes and dirt-streaked face. "What did you do?"
He pulled my hands to his lips. "I hunted down all of those involved. They will no longer be a problem."
I felt my heart drop into my stomach. "You killed them?"
He gave a small smile. It looked like forced sympathy. "I've told you. I must do this. If I don't, it will be anarchy. As king, I must punish those who mean to harm us."
More death. Because of me. I felt a sob almost take me.
He shushed me gently and pulled me close. He gripped the back of my neck and kissed my temple, my cheek and when he meant to kiss my lips I pulled away forcefully.
I felt his hand tense suddenly as he gripped the back of my neck. When I looked at him, his eyes were shut and his lips thinned. I'd only seen Damien this angry only once before.
When I had told him of Leah's involvement in Robyn's plans.
It was not an emotion I was used to seeing him with.
I could see Robyn beneath it - that anger was familiar. I'd seen it in my dreams enough times.
And it terrified me.
His voice was low and soft. His words were only meant for me. "You keep pulling away from me, Em. Every time I show you any sort of affection." He opened his eyes. They swirled with anger. "Why?"
I was frozen unable to look away from his angry eyes. "I'm sorry," I breathed. "It's just everything that's happening it's too much."
He loosened his grip and exhaled. "I'm sorry about last night. I should have been with you." He smiled slightly. His thumb caressed my cheek softly. "I know what will make you feel better." He dropped his hands again. "What if we visited your parents?"
I felt the color drain from my face. No. No. We couldn't. I couldn't let Robyn anywhere near my parents.
I could feel my pulse race as I grasped at a million thoughts rushing my mind.
He smiled again. "Asmodeus told me how you defended yourself. You showed you have true control over your power. You're ready to see them. Faster than I thought possible." He leaned forward and kissed my forehead. "You continue to astound me, love."
I couldn't speak. I couldn't move.
Asmodeus approached. "That is not a good idea-"
Damien shook his head then looked back at me. "No one knows Emylin like I do. She's ready." His smile grew. "We'll see them tonight. They will love that."