Chapter 14 #2
“You know, I think I like you better when you’re a normal asshole,” she says. “Now, you’re still being an asshole but also a pain in the ass.”
I fight back a grin, hating how much I always love her sassy comebacks.
I don’t know what the fuck Noah would think about this either. His best friend, feeding his sister soup and sleeping in bed next to her. I have a feeling he wouldn’t be super pumped about it all …
I reach for the medicine on the tray and grab the Gatorade again before passing them both to her.
She eyes them over before weakly taking the gel caps from my hands.
She tosses the pills into her mouth before taking a big drink through the straw.
Once she’s done, she hands the drink back to me and lifts a brow.
“So … now do I get a popsicle or what?”
Even though watching her lick a popsicle is going to be enough to make me to lose my fucking mind and give me enough spank-bank material to last a good while, I nod.
“I suppose so,” I utter, standing up and grabbing the tray.
“I’ll be right back after I take care of my dishes downstairs.
” I pause, standing in the doorway and glancing back at her.
“Well, your dishes. But, since you helped me score that grade the other day, I guess I’ll wash them,” I add, just to drive home that I’m being nice for that reason only. Even if it’s a lie.
Unfazed and in true Haven form, she lifts her hand and sticks her middle finger up at me. Flashing her an unimpressed look, even though I want to grin, I walk downstairs. Continuing to pathetically care for her, even if it’s wrong.
I keep my eyes on the television for as long as I can. My body is so stiff and rigid that it actually hurts. But if I look over at Haven while she’s deepthroating that popsicle, other things will be stiff, and that’s going to make me look like a fucking weirdo.
Since she’s sick, I let her pick the movie, and of course, she chose the chick flick Sweet Home Alabama because it’s one of her favorites.
It’s corny as fuck and dumb as hell, but I knew when I told her to pick one, I was going to get hit with either this or something with Kate Hudson in it.
Because for as long as I’ve known her, that’s what she’d have on the television when I went to her house for family shit or to hang out with Noah.
“How many times have you seen this awful movie?” I ask, knowing it’s not that bad, I just like pissing her off.
“Enough for you to know that it’s my favorite and if you call it awful again, I’ll kick you directly in the balls.”
I dare to look her way, and finally, she’s done with her popsicle and tosses the stick across the room, landing it perfectly in the tiny trash bin.
Before she gets a chance to relax back in the bed, she starts coughing again.
If her stomach wasn’t already as flat and sculpted as they come, it would be after she was done with this sickness, that’s for fucking sure.
Instinctively, I sit up, rubbing my hand across her back gently.
We may have known each other since I was eleven and she was twelve, but we’ve never been this type of close.
Sure, we kissed once, and another time, she calmed me down when I was pissed, holding onto me tightly, but we’ve never had the type of friendship to lay in bed together or rub each other’s backs.
Until now.
“My God, I’m so fucking sick of coughing,” she says, half a whine, half a growl. “My abs hurt so bad.”
I don’t know what it is that makes me feel bad for her, but I do.
I’ve lived through much worse than a damn cough and fever.
And in those times, I didn’t have anyone to help me feel better either.
Maybe that’s why I’m so fixated on helping her right now.
Because up until I was adopted, I didn’t have anyone to rub my back or make me soup when I was sick.
My adoptive parents have showed me what it’s like to care for someone because they cared for me.
Now, here I am, passing those skills onto Haven—out of all people.
“Come here,” I murmur. Putting my arms around her, I gently pull her to my chest.
Her body tenses, but only for a split second before she’s practically melting into me. I sit up slightly, keeping myself at a bit of an angle and holding her back against me with her head resting just below my chin.
It’s too far. It’s too close and too intimate. Yet here I am, arms wrapped around her, holding her tightly as her body shakes each time she coughs.
The closer I get to her, the more I push the boundaries—confusing us both. But fuck, I can’t force myself to get out of this bed and walk out of this room like I know I should.
Instead, I just hold her. I hold her, and I hope that when tomorrow comes, she doesn’t hold any of this over my head.
She turns her face slightly into my chest, snuggling it softly before yawning.
“That last dose was for nighttime, wasn’t it?” she whispers, no doubt feeling the effects of the NyQuil coming on. I wanted her to get some sleep, and I figured the best bet was if she had that.
“Yeah,” I murmur, my chin now touching her hair. “Figured you could use some rest, Short.”
She feels so good against me, and I hate that even though I’m doing this to comfort her, it’s comforting me more.
“Okay,” she mutters, sighing. “But D?”
My heart beats a little faster, and I hope she doesn’t feel it against her cheek.
“Yeah?”
“I don’t snore,” she says, and I can almost hear the smirk in her voice, making me chuckle.
“If you say so.” I relax back the slightest bit, making it so I’m laying down more now. “Now, sleep.”
She’s silent for long enough that I think she may have actually listened. But finally, her raspy voice tells me otherwise.
“Are you going to be here when I wake up?” she asks softly.
Everything inside me is screaming to shut this down. To say a joke or tell her no. I’m playing with fire, and even though I’ve been burned too many times in my life to care … Haven hasn’t. And I don’t want to be the one to scorch her.
I swallow roughly. “Do you want me to be?”
Her head bobs slightly, nodding against my chest. “Yeah,” she whispers, so faintly that if she didn’t confirm it with a nod, I would second guess what she said. She wants me here, and I know that’s not good. Yet here I am, stuck like my body is cemented.
“Then I’ll be here,” I answer. “Now … sleep.”
As she relaxes into me and her breathing deepens, I wonder what the fuck I’ll do in the morning when we wake up together, not knowing what even to say.
I told her I’d stay though, so I guess that’s a bridge I’ll cross when the sun comes up. Until then, I’m just going to hold her and pretend like I don’t know this is a really bad idea.