35. Wyatt
THIRTY-FIVE
WYATT
That night was the longest of my life. Everything depended on our plan working without a hitch, and even though the first part was successful, the next part was the most crucial one. It was the part that would get rid of Wilson and his men once and for all.
The hardest aspect of that sleepless night, though, was not being able to sit next to Ari, to hold his hand, to rest my head on his shoulder.
My heart physically ached looking at him across the room, squashed in between Warren and Azrael trying to eat his slice of chocolate cake that Zach had baked for us.
Apparently it was the only thing that calmed his nerves, which explained why Duke’s kitchen was full of baked goods. Good thing we had an army to feed.
Everyone directly involved with taking him down was under one roof.
SEALs, partners, kids, family. The only ones we hadn’t been able to get here, and which would have been tricky to convince anyway, were people in our circle that had a vague awareness of the goings-on but hadn’t been directly affected by Wilson’s criminal activities.
People like Carson and Cole, the owners of Carson’s Grill, or those other store owners that had been victims of the racketeering ring that had nearly destroyed Hwan’s bubble tea shop.
Even though getting them here wasn’t possible, they had been instructed to stay home all night and the next day until they got the okay.
It had been a tough ask—how did you ask businesspeople to keep their stores closed on a Saturday morning on the launch of another money-making festival—but thankfully, Hwan was very convincing.
That and the risk to their lives, of course.
“How are you feeling?” Dare asked, crouching down next to me and offering me a bottle of beer.
I grabbed the bottle and leaned back on the chair, and with that, the soreness all over my body came to the forefront, throbbing right under my skin and making me feel heavier.
“Rough,” I croaked.
“You look it,” he answered and gave me the once-over.
I rolled my eyes and kicked his foot. “Dick!” I muttered.
“You want me to sugar-coat it? I can. But we both know you won’t believe it.”
“Well, I won’t believe it now that you told me I look like shit.”
“Hey! I never said shit.”
I took a swig of the beer and sighed. “You think it’s going to work?” I asked, taking a look around at everyone either eating, dozing, or whispering in little groups.
“If it doesn’t, we’ll be in deep shit,” Dare said.
“That’s why it has to work. It has to.”
Dare nodded, took a sip of his beer, and stood up, patting me on the back before going to sit by his boyfriend.
Zach spoon-fed him a bite of chocolate cake, and my heart warmed. It was nice to see him happy and loved. Just because I could never give him what he wanted, it didn’t mean I didn’t want him to be content.
I glanced at Ari who waved his own spoon at me, and he smiled.
My heart thundered in my chest at the sight of him. So sweet. So beautiful. So gentle. I really hoped I wasn’t screwing him over like I’d done with Dare. Even though it felt different—I felt different—when I was with him, I still worried that I was going to let him down.
I wanted nothing more than to hold him. To be with him. To live under the same roof and have couples dinners with our friends. Maybe a kid, though I was definitely too old for that.
I can’t screw this up. I can’t.
I wanted forever with that man, even if it felt impossible right now.
That was why tomorrow had to work. I couldn’t even think about the future when as long as Wilson was free, we weren’t safe.
I finished my beer and leaned back on the chair, closed my eyes, and tried to get some shut-eye. Yet as soon as I closed my eyes, my heart started pounding in my chest. So did my temples. My entire body pulsed, making me sweat.
I wouldn’t be able to rest. Not until Wilson was toast. I would never be at peace as long as he was at large.
As expected, sleeping proved impossible, and even the times I drifted off—an after-effect of the pain and the pain meds—it was only for a few minutes at a time, and every time I woke up, I felt worse than the last, until it was finally time to get up and act.
After breakfast was served, with the help of Joey, Dare, and Hwan, we went through the plan again and split up into teams before heading out.
By the time I came out of the house, the driveway in front of Duke’s sanctuary was empty, save for Warren’s car.
“Are you ready?” he asked and put his arm around my shoulders.
“Ready for this to be over, yeah.” I looked behind me, but the door was closed and no one else came out. “Where is your friend?”
Warren raised an eyebrow. “You mean Ari?”
“Yeah. Yeah. Him,” I muttered, and I felt like an idiot.
“I sent your boyfriend with Hwan,” he said. My eyes almost popped out of their sockets. “I thought the fewer distractions you have right now, the better.”
I opened my mouth to deny him, to deny the title he’d given Ari, but I didn’t have the heart to. I couldn’t reject him like that. Besides, it would be pointless to, considering Warren knew about me.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“What for?”
I shrugged. “I’m just sorry.”
Warren squeezed my shoulder and looked me in the eyes. “You don’t have to be sorry, you know? There’s nothing wrong with you.”
“It feels like there is. I can’t even talk about it, even though I know you know. I’m just going to disappoint him. And you. And everyone.”
“Why? How?” He let go and stood opposite me now, and I almost felt like I was being interrogated.
“Because…I’m just constantly scared. Scared of screwing it up, scared of coming out, scared of what people might say. It’s bound to happen. That he’ll realize I’m not good for him and I’m only making his life worse.”
“Did you love Dare?” he asked, and I sucked in a big breath. I never talked about my past with anyone. It felt…strange. Terrifying.
“Of course.”
“And what happened?”
“I lost him.”
“No,” he said. “You couldn’t commit. You let your fear rule you. If you don’t want to ruin things with Ari, you just have to commit. Is that so hard?”
I didn’t answer. I couldn’t.
“Look. I can’t pretend to know or understand how you feel or how this whole thing feels for someone like you.
But if it were me, the only thing that would matter was whether I can imagine my life without that person.
Can you? Can you stand to lose another person because you are afraid of what some strangers that are neither paying your bills, nor are relevant to your life might say? ”
I breathed in and shook my head. Warren patted my shoulder again and moved toward his car.
It was easier said than done, but he was right. I couldn’t imagine losing Ari too. Not over something so…trivial. Trivial when there was the very real threat of Wilson over our heads.
“You coming?” he asked before he got into the driver’s seat, and I sprang into motion again.
The ride to the town center was long, and at some point, we had to ditch the cars and continue on foot.
People had come to Mayberry in droves for Winterfest, just an old excuse to bring the tourists back after the Christmas period.
It was nowhere near as busy as it had been in December, but with most of the roads leading to town closed off for the stalls and booths set up, it felt busy.
This was either going to be to our benefit or our detriment. We met the others, the Alpha team, though we didn’t have earpieces or weapons on us—well, none visible, anyway—and we got into position near the stage where a crowd had already started to gather.
After a few minutes, Dare checked his phone and made a circle with his thumb and forefinger.
Slade’s team, Team Bravo, was all in position too. Now we just had to wait some more. Wilson’s opening speech for the festival was due to start in five minutes, but when five minutes rolled by and another five and he hadn’t shown, I started to breathe funny.
“What if he’s not gonna show?” I asked.
Warren raised an eyebrow.
“And miss being the center of attention? Nah. He’ll show. These things run late all the time.”
I nodded and looked at the stage again. What if he didn’t show? What if we’d screwed up and the second, most crucial part of our plan couldn’t be completed?
Shit. We’ll never be rid of this guy.
As the town square got busier and busier and the noise of chatter became so deafening I couldn’t even think, I stared at the stage, willing him into existence. Seconds turned to minutes.
I was about to give up when someone took to the stage. I arched my back to look better, but it was only a woman. She walked up to the microphone and tested it before addressing the audience.
“Welcome to Winterfest, everyone,” she said, and the air left my lungs.
We’d lost him. He hadn’t shown. He was probably busy planning his next move. His next attack.
“Please give it up for our new mayor, Jake Wilson, who will kick off our festival.”
I blinked. I looked at the young woman then at Wilson’s gray head which came into view as he got on stage. I turned to Warren and Dare.
“He’s here,” I said, barely believing it was true.
“Told you,” Warren said.
Dare nodded. “You’re up. Are you going to be okay?”
I took a deep breath, steeling myself to the outside world, and gave a single firm nod. It was time to take this motherfucker down.
I stood up from my seat and weaved through the audience with only one purpose in mind.
To get to him. I tried to forget everything and everyone else.
The threat to the lives of all the people around me.
The very real possibility of things going awry.
The danger of being surrounded by people in Wilson’s pocket.
And most of all, I tried to forget Ari, who was somewhere amongst them, watching, waiting.
I couldn’t think about him right now. Not now. I needed to be laser focused. I couldn’t slip up. I couldn’t let him get away. I had to be in mission mode if I was going to succeed.