Chapter 8
Chapter
Eight
Joel
“ Y es! Now, this is what I’m talking about. Hello pretty ladies,” My brother gleams with fucking happiness when a group of women walk through the bar and into the outside area where we are currently sitting. We are in the garden of The Mess Room, an intimate little bar in Skipton where the atmosphere is gradually picking up for the weekend. Brick walls, wooden tables, tabletop lanterns and fairy lights surround us along with the live music coming from inside.
It’s warm out tonight, the drinks are flowing smoothly, but where I’ve been struggling with the anxiety of being out, I’m now experiencing a different feeling altogether, and the reason for that is Edith.
She’s dressed in a short, thin-strapped, white and black polka dot dress. Her hair is down in loose curls, her legs are on full show and my mind is going crazy.
I can’t stop fucking looking at her.
“You are such a man whore,” Daisy says to Daniel before sucking her vodka red bull through her straw.
“And proud Baby D.” My brother grins.
“What do you expect? The guy lives around dinosaurs, toys and kid conversations. Coming out to a life outside of Appletreewick is like him winning the lottery,” Edith jokes.
“God help him if he ever did win. I dread to think what he’d do,” I add.
“I’ll higher a shit hot nanny for Ted and make sure she understands that there will be a clause written into her contract that requires her to wrap her mouth around my cock.”
“Oh please,” both the girls say in unison.
“Why doesn’t that surprise me?” I laugh.
“On a serious note, would anyone ever leave the village if they did win the lottery?” Daisy asks. “Like pack up and move on? ”
“I’d have to play it to win, but I don’t think I would,” Edith replies. “I love this place too much, and it’s true what they say.”
“What?”
“There’s no place like home,” Edie and I say together.
Her eyes find mine and she grins. She always used to say that when she was a teen after watching the Wizard of Oz, only Edith’s memory of home isn’t her own. It’s of mine and Daniels. Many times, she’d come around to ours to hang out, play board games or watch movies on a Sunday because our parents believed in family time. Whenever Mum and Dad would cook her a Sunday dinner, she’d finish it with a thank you and a ‘ there’s no place like home’.
I hadn’t expected to find a friendship with her like I did. We’d been inseparable, but the closeness soon started to slip through my fingers when I chose to date Sophia. We’d remained close, but some things will never be the same.
I’m brought out of my thoughts with the sound of Daisy cheering and banging her hands on top of the table demanding that we do shots, right before she whispers something to Edith and has her throwing her head back and laughing, too. The thrill on her face makes me laugh. It warms my heart to see her this way .
“Right, let’s do shots and crazy this shit up. What’s everyone having?” Daisy says, standing from the table and getting ready to head to the bar.
“I’m good with my beer, thank you,” I add, still not feeling the vibe that everyone else is tonight.
“That’s his way of saying he’s happy to get shit-face with the rest of us,” Daniel laughs, standing behind Daisy. “Come on, I’ll help you with the drinks. There’s a pretty lady I want to talk with at the bar.”
“Ahh, thanks, Danny Boy,” Daisy adds. “But you do know that you don’t just have to talk to me at the bar. I’m also pretty when I’m sitting here.”
“Not you, shithead.”
They manoeuvre their way around people, and I feel a little envious towards my brother as I watch him with the ladies. He makes it look so easy. Meanwhile, I’m sitting here, struggling with the thought of ever dating again and the growing feelings I can’t comprehend when it comes to my best friend.
“You okay?” Edith says, drawing my attention back to her.
She’s moved to sit beside me, her coconut body lotion hitting my senses.
“I’m a little better now that I have a few drinks inside me.”
It’s not that I hadn’t wanted to come out and enjoy myself, it’s more the fact that the last time I came into Skipton to get drunk it had ended with the phone call that changed everything.
“Stupid I know.”
“It’s not stupid. If it helps, I can’t even look at a packet of pork scratchings without thinking of Leon.”
I can’t help but laugh. “I thought he was a vegetarian?”
“Yeah, well, that man led two different lives. My point is, it’s normal. But…” She shifts closer, placing her hand on my bare arm, and her delicate touch has tingles racing down my spine. “Just try to enjoy yourself. And if you get to the point you’ve had enough and want to go home, we’ll go home.”
“And cut your night short?”
“Yeah. You’re my number one.” She smiles. “I’ve got you.”
Jesus, she isn’t helping.
I don’t know how many times over the years I’ve found myself oblivious to the world around me in her presence but right now, with her sitting this close, she’s reviving feelings that I’ve hidden for so long.
“I’ve got you, too,” I murmur.
I want to touch her, feel the soft skin of her neck under my fingertips and circle my finger around the freckle on her collarbone that seems to be fucking jumping out for attention. But that’s all cut short when Daisy and Daniel arrive back to the table with a tray of eight shots and another with beers and vodka-red-bulls.
“Jesus, you trying to kill my liver?”
“You’ll be thanking me shortly, big brother,” Daniel says, handing me my beer before placing two vodka shots in front of me. “Daisy has just informed me our next stop is The Fleece. It’s karaoke night, and her lungs are eager to sing. So, drink up.”
“Oh Lord.”
“Anyone would think you don’t like my singing.”
“We don’t,” the rest of us say in agreement. Daisy loves to sing. Only she can’t. She sounds more like a wailing cat on helium than anything adequate.
“So, is everyone up for that? Yes?” Daisy asks. “I want to sing and go dancing.”
My brother is the first to agree, followed by Edith. If you’d asked me at the beginning of the night how I feel about pub crawls and vodka shots, I would have said I’d rather stay at home, but with alcohol now soaking my bloodstream and the company I’m in, I’m more relaxed than I have been in ages. Maybe Edith is right: maybe if I shed this weighted armour, I might enjoy myself. For too long, I’ve carried so much guilt over Sophia, and it doesn’t change anything. So, I shouldn’t let that stop me having fun with the people I care about.
Picking up my first shot, I down it in one before adding, “Let’s go dancing.”
“ T hey are in their fucking element.” My brother laughs, placing two beers on the high table we are standing at. We’ve been in the Fleece Inn for a couple hours now and it’s packed out. Disco lights bounce around the walls and the music blares as the drinks flow far too well. But what has me grinning like an idiot is watching Edith and Daisy up ahead as they sing their hearts out to Pink’s, Get This Party Started on the karaoke. I don’t know how Daisy twisted Edith’s arm, but she’s up there and looks to be living her best life.
I watch her every move.
“They sure are.”
“Are you glad you came out?”
I turn to my brother and grin. “Maybe.”
“Fucking liar,” he laughs. “I told you a night out would do you good. You never listen to me.”
“I listen. I just don’t always act on what you say.” I wrap my arm around his shoulders and give him a big I-love-you-little-brother kiss on the cheek that has him squirming to get away. “But yes, you were right. Thank you. Although, my head might not agree with you in the morning.”
He laughs, nodding towards the girls. “I don’t think theirs will either.”
Everyone is jumping up and down and singing along to the girls on the stage like they are at their own concert. If the two of them aren’t singing, they are dancing, and if they aren’t doing that, they are laughing their heads off down the microphone, everyone in the bar laughing with them. I’ve not seen Edith so relaxed in a long time, and it makes me even more grateful that I’ve come out tonight to witness it. She’s so hard on herself at times it drives me crazy. She strives to be the best, but I often wonder if she’s pushing herself to gain approval from those who don’t notice her as they should.
Once the song finishes, the whole bar erupts into cheers, and the girls take a bow. They are still laughing when they get back to our table and I hand Edith her drink, circling my arm around her waist.
“How bad was I?” she hollers.
“You were amazing. I think you’ve found a new vocation in life. Edith Kennedy: pub life entertainer. ”
She laughs. “Will you be my manager and come with me?”
“I’d go anywhere with you. Just as long as we have Sundays off and you take me out for a pint and a packet of crisps.”
“Deal.” She grins, taking her phone out of her bag. I watch her as she punches in her PIN code before flipping it to camera mode. “I need a picture of this: the night I changed my dream because my BFF said so.”
I laugh, pulling her into me, and resting the side of my head against hers before she raises her arm out in front of us.
“Are we posing?”
“Of course.”
I stick my tongue out to the side as she pouts her lips and clicks the camera.
Bringing the phone closer, she looks at the image of us both and grins. “Aww, we look so cute.”
It is a nice photo, and I want a copy for myself because not only is Edith standing next to me, it’s the first one where I can honestly say I look happy. Alcohol intake or not, I look completely fucking different to the person I thought I was.
She sucks on her straw, finishing her drink, swaying to the music. “Come dance with me.”
My eyes widen. “What? No. I don’t dance. ”
“Come on, Fitz. You know you want to.” She wiggles her brows and places her glass on the table. Daniel and Daisy are already on the dance floor, and each step Edith takes back, I shake my head, grinning as she beckons me with her finger.
“You know you want to.” The truth is I do. I want to because right now I’ve never felt more alive, but it would also be dangerous. Being in close contact, feeling her against me and having no limitations will only fuel the fire that is burning throughout my body. So, I watch. I watch her intensely. Captivated by her every move. Jessie Ware’s, What’s your pleasure? is playing, the lyrics a perfect accompaniment to the bubble of anticipation that is slowly growing between us.
Closing her eyes, her arms lift above her head, her knees bend and dip, and she sways her body to the beat in the most sensual way, causing desire to race through me and has blood rushing to my pelvis, awakening an arousal I’ve not felt in so long.
I'm hard.
My best friend has got me fucking hard.
Holy shit.
When her eyes open, they instantly find mine, and like there is no one else in the room, we hold each other’s heated gaze as she continues to move to the music .
Needing her close, it’s me that now beckons her.
She doesn’t hesitate to link her arms around my neck.
I don’t know if it’s the amount of alcohol inside her that has given her the confidence, but I’m not in a position to push her away either. We’ve never been like this. We are close, we hug and hold each other, but we’ve never been like this.
“What are you thinking?” she asks, her voice low.
Pulling her closer, I tuck her hair behind her ear and reply with the only thing that’s on my mind and has been all evening. “How fucking beautiful you look.”
She takes her eyes off me, a blush glowing across her cheeks. “I wasn’t expecting you to say that.”
“But it’s true.” I pull her flush against me—knowing this is forbidden territory because of the way my body is racing right now—and like a fucking calling, that damn freckle screams at me louder than ever. Circling my fingertip around the little brown mark, causes her mouth to part. Her eyes darken, and I'm waiting for that warning from her that my move is wrong. But it doesn't come.
It’s right there that I see she feels this, too. Whatever the fuck is happening between us right now, she feels it .
“You haven’t done that in years,” she murmurs.
“I haven’t been able to,” I admit. And believe me, I’ve wanted to.
As the music slows and the bodies around us shift gear and become closer, I place my hand on her lower back and take hers in my other, to stop myself from touching her anymore.
“Dance with me,” I say.
“I didn’t think you danced.”
“I’ve changed my mind.”
Resting my forehead against hers, I close my eyes and move slowly to the music, picturing that night thirteen years ago—the one where I pinned her against the wall outside of the Craven. Her hair had been in two braids, the white summer’s dress she’d worn making her look like an angel, and her cherry red lips and bright smile had me caving. I’d been a little drunk, and she’d sneaked a Babycgham, the drink every teenage girl had begun their alcoholic journey with back then, but I remember it all—every fucking thing about that moment with her.
I’d kissed her without warning, and she’d held on to me like a glove, latching onto my body as if she were made to be there, and I’d fallen into her touch in a way I’d never known I needed.
But I’d been twenty and she was only fifteen.
Anything more with her would have been wrong in the eyes of the law, and I’d never have put Edith through the trial and tribulations that I knew would have come of it, especially with Lorna the ringleader of everything when it came to my best friend. I wasn’t prepared to risk falling for her. Not only that, but my Edie deserved better than a foolish young man like me.
Now, here, I’d give anything to kiss her again. I’d give anything to know if her taste is just as sweet as I remember—if her lips are as soft and if they still have the hint of cherry lip balm.
I want to kiss my best friend.
Right fucking now.
And I don’t even know if I should.