31. Forgiveness
Deyva
“K ais, what the fuck?” Zach snapped, his hand gesturing to my red and intricately patterned ass.
“Dey, you were seriously going to go back there?” Stavros whispered. He was sitting on the lid of the toilet as Zach and Kais filled up the rest of the small bathroom, their chests puffing.
“Zach, I’m electing not to heal them. It’s fine,” I said, and Zach only shot me a sharp glare. Yep, still in that doghouse too. Speaking of, I reached a hand out of the shower to Stavros who only stared blankly at it. “Stavros, I’m so sorry.”
“But you came back,” he said, frowning.
I shrugged. “Az rescued me.”
“Az?” Zach squawked.
“He saw her leave,” Kais said. “Came and woke me up. Swore he could bring her back.”
“And you didn’t fucking think we should know about it?!” Stavros shouted, face turning red.
“I did, if there was anything we needed to do about it. Thankfully, Az handled it. He knew what he was doing and I trusted him on that.”
“Deyva,” Zach said softly, brows drawing together. “You really wouldn’t have come back on your own?”
“I…” God, the air in the bathroom was thick with the rotten, meaty flavor of betrayal and I wanted to gag a little, but I didn’t think that would help the situation. I was the betrayer in the scenario. “If I’d...it’s just that…” I sighed, shoulders sagging. “No. I was determined to go.”
Stavros made a strangled moaning sound and Zach fell back against the wall, face crumpling.
“She thought she could talk Hell out of attacking Bethel any further.”
“The whole thing with the hellhound was a warning, at best. A threat. I figured if I could keep Kimaris and King Belial busy for like, the next sixty years or so torturing me, you’d all…” Be at peace by the time Hell remembered it wanted its revenge against my men.
“We won that battle,” Stavros said.
“Yeah, but it was only hellbats! You didn’t see it, but there was an entire army out there,” I said.
“Five,” Kais said.
All three of us turned to stare at him and I shut the water off with a quick snap. “ What? ”
“There are five, now four, armies surrounding Bethel. Az reported that last night too,” Kais said. “And the four haven’t retreated.”
My mouth hung open, water dripping off me into the tub. Part of me couldn’t help thinking that if I’d maybe left a week ago—but no, I’d marked these men long before I’d really even touched them.
They had marked me too. That was why I came back. Well, that and I’d had a bunch of ribs broken and Az hadn’t given me a choice.
“How much time do we have?” I whispered. It wasn’t just my ass that had to heal. I was stronger than a human, but I’d been pushing all my strength at everyone else for the past week, and I had some catching up to do if we had four armies to take on. Oh God, four armies.
“Even if every single volunteer was really ready—” Zach stopped short and shook his head.
“Azariah is no slouch,” I said, blinking as Stavros leaned forward, grabbing the towel and passing it to me, his eyes taking a furtive look over my body. “He probably needs to power up after blowing it on those pain beasts though.”
“We’ve got eyes on them, and they’re not moving,” Kais said. “Azariah isn’t the only one who needs to catch his breath. When something changes, we want to be ready.”
Zach nodded and then he and Stavros both watched as Kais crossed the small space, stepping in front of me in my little towel, cupping my face and lifting it to his. He pressed his lips fully to mine, arms wrapping around my shoulders to hold me in a firm embrace.
“We are going to survive, Daisy,” he whispered, our breath mingling. “You’re ours now.” He stepped back, smile faint but shining in his dark eyes, even as he glanced down at Stavros and arched an eyebrow. “Kiss and make up, yeah? We’ve got shit to do.”
“Yes, sir,” I said, saluting Kais' deliciously tight ass as he spun and marched out, and then immediately regretting it when Zach and Stavros stared at me with those blank and wounded expressions. “You guys…”
“Deyva, how could you leave?” Zach asked.
“I know...I know how stupid it seems. I didn’t know about the armies! I just...I didn’t come here expecting you to—to—”
“Fall in love with you,” Stavros said slowly, eyebrows raising.
I bit my lip and nodded, bracing myself against the rising wave of his frustration and heartache as it battered against me.
“I didn’t know that I could even still feel those things either.
For you, for Zach...for Kais. God, even for this whole freaking town, even though the majority of people here hate me.
And fucking Az? I mean he deserved not to get dragged back to Hell when he decided not to do the same to me, right? I thought I could fix it.”
“We never would’ve stopped searching for you, fighting for you,” Zach said. And even though he sounded so offended by the notion that I hadn’t considered this, I couldn’t help the warmth that grew in me at his declaration.
“In my defense, those aren’t really the kind of gestures that get exchanged in Hell,” I said meekly.
“Bullshit,” Stavros snapped, standing, grasping at my shoulders. “Don’t lie. You knew. You had to feel—feel this ,” he growled, taking one of my hands and pressing it roughly over his heart, letting an ocean of love and agony and need well up inside of him, his eyes growing wet and mine with him.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I—I would still give up anything, even that, if I knew it meant you’d all be safe,” I whispered.
Stavros growled, but he only pulled me into his chest. Zach quickly joined us, sandwiching me warmly between them. His own feelings were comparatively tentative, but they glittered against me, little kisses of salt and honey on my tongue.
“You don’t ever, ever , pull that shit again,” Stavros snarled. “I don’t care if the Devil himself promises our health and happiness in writing. You don’t fucking risk us losing you.”
I nodded against him, my throat too tight to say the actual words.
“Chin up,” Stavros said.
I lifted my chin and he took it in a hard grip, his mouth slamming over mine with such hunger it drew a moan right out of me, as his tongue thrust against mine.
“Feed,” Zach murmured, kissing my shoulder.
“You look pale still.” His hands pushed the towel up over my hips and he rubbed at my hot, aching ass over the marks Kais had left and I'd elected to keep.
It was a pleasurable sting and I rose up to my toes, rocking lightly between my men, taking careful sips from each of them.
Stavros ripped away, glaring down at me, but the heat in his gaze was full of love. “Fucking feed, Deyva,” he snapped. “Take everything you need.”
I can’t. You need it more , I thought, drawing a little more, but still too cautious to really feast. There was only one way that I was going to be ready for war without wearing my men out.
And it was such an obnoxious solution, really.
“This is a pretty big step, isn’t it?” Zach excitedly looked at the empty space in Stavros' closet as he set a box down at the foot of the bed.
“We already live together.” Stav’s chest rumbled with a soft laugh under my head. “But yeah, moving your stuff in here makes it more official, I guess.”
“How do you feel about it, Zach?” I wound my leg over Stav’s, lifting my head at an angle to scratch his beard with my horn.
“I’m...really excited.” The young priest’s eyes were so bright and his smile infectious. His joy tasted sweet and rich, coming off of him in thick waves. “I know I’m just moving my stuff from next door, but making this our room feels really good.”
“Finish putting your stuff away later and come here,” Stavros said in a gruff growl, extending his free arm.
Zach put the box on a side table and took a running leap over the foot of the bed.
He bounced once before Stav wrapped a thick arm around him, pulling him into his opposite side for a nuzzling kiss.
Zach and I loved on him together, exchanging kisses and locking our hands together on Stav’s chest. Our legs wrapped around each of his, holding him captive in our cuddle pile.
“What are you gonna use the empty room for now?” I asked, looking at Zach across Stav’s body.
He chewed his lip, eyes darting to both of us. “I was thinking, maybe Azariah could have it.”
My head lifted in surprise while Stavros let out a thoughtful, “Hmm.”
“You’re okay with him living here? Like permanently?”
“I mean, he’s proved himself enough. Don’t you think?
” Zach released my hand to scratch Stav’s beard.
“If he had any ulterior motives, he would have just let you leave, right? But he brought you back to us. He’s strengthened our defenses, and helped bring the people around to accepting you.
It’s not much of a bedroom, but I feel we ought to offer him something. ”
“That’s sweet of you.” Stavros wrapped tighter around him, tilting his face in for a kiss. “But after what he did, you’re okay with him being so close to us?”
“It’s not like he coerced me or anything,” Zach huffed, a blush rising in his cheeks. “I was an equal participant in that, even if I wasn’t thinking about all the consequences at the time.”
“There’s something else we need to consider,” I piped up hesitantly.
“Yeah, babe?” Stavros turned his head, brushing a kiss along my horns.
I shivered at the sensation, smiling into his shoulder. “In order to be at full-strength for this fight, I’ll need to feed on Azariah.”
“Oh.”
“Oh!”
Both of my men’s eyes widened at the implication of what that meant.
“It doesn’t have to be sex, but,” my fingers curled into Stavros' shirt, “for best results, it probably should be.”
“Do you want to, y’know, be with him? Like that?”
Stavros and I chuckled at the innocent question from Zach.
“I like him more now than before,” I admitted.
“He’s an angel, so of course he’s attractive, and sex with his kind is on a completely other level.
I mean—” I bit my lip at the twinge of hurt on Zach’s face.
“—feeding-wise, he can power me to full strength and not be drained himself. And he can feed on me in the same way. It’s just because our species are so similar.
Does this mean I want to make him my boyfriend?
” I shook my head. “Not if my three don’t want that. ”
They didn’t even blink at me including Kais with them. In all honesty, they never had. Kais wasn’t interested in a cuddle pile with two other men, but he was just as much a part of this love-rectangle.
Zach was blushing madly after I said my piece and looked extremely conflicted about saying something. He tasted curious and a little embarrassed.
“Spit it out, Z.” Stavros kissed the side of his face, playfully biting the red apple of his cheek.
“Just, um.” His blush deepened more, eyes downcast shyly. “Like, I love you two so much and I’m not saying this isn’t enough for me, but—”
“Oh my God!” I sat straight up in bed, finally pinpointing the source of his feelings. “You still want to fuck Az.”
“I mean, I’m just curious, okay? You keep saying being with angels is like this divine, holy experience, and I—”
“Sweet, beautiful, man.” I leaned over Stav to kiss him, only for Stav to grab my ass with a hungry growl as he watched us. “You’re allowed to be curious about anything you want. And if that’s something you really want to do, well...” I looked down at Stav, awaiting his input.
“I’m fine with it,” he said with a shrug. “But it’s Zach's decision, and he should be the one to approach him,” he added with a protective growl.
“But what if he turns me down?” Zach pouted.
“Welcome to having a sex life,” Stavros laughed, pulling him closer. “Sometimes, you get rejected. Although I don’t think Az would.”
“He wants you just as badly.” I nodded my agreement. “I mean granted, he wants to fuck almost everyone, but you’d be his first choice.”
“Hmm, I dunno about that.” Stavros slid a hand up my ribs, holding my breast with a light squeeze. “I’d say he wants you both equally. He just thought he could have Zach.”
“I dunno if I’ll actually pursue anything,” Zach said. “Some things are just meant to stay fantasies, right?” He flopped back down onto Stav’s chest, grabbing my other breast with a contented sigh. “I have everything I need right here.”
I smiled at him, soaking up the delicious flavors of love and fulfillment coating all three of us. “If the urge ever strikes you, just know you have our blessing.”
“And if you want to make him your boyfriend too,” Zach looked at Stav, who nodded, “I get that it’s completely different than being with a human. So, I’d be okay with it.” His grin turned devilish. “If you share him.”
“You naughty little priest!” I slapped his arm with a mock-gasp. “How dare you entertain such lascivious thoughts.”
“Oh no! Please forgive me,” he played along with an adorably bratty whine. “Do I need to go to confession?”
“Yes, you do.” Stavros' voice was rough with lust as he leaned up and turned to pin Zach beneath him. “Your penance is ten Oh Fathers , sinner.”
“Oh,” Zach whimpered, the sound needy as Stavros pinned his wrists next to his head, thick thighs straddling the young priest’s hips as he started slow, grinding thrusts. “Mm, Father.”
“That’s one.” Stav leaned down and took a rough kiss from his mouth. “Nine more. Up to you how long you want to repent.”
“Ohh, Fath—wait, no! That one doesn’t count.”
I giggled, stretching out on my side to watch them and take sips of their love and playfulness. It wouldn’t be many more Oh, Fathers before I jumped in for my own repentance.