Chapter Forty-Two
Calypso
Scrubbing my hands down my face, I wait for Liam to unlock the front door. My cheek stopped stinging a couple of hours ago. We were at the police station for what felt like hours, but it’s not even midnight yet. It couldn’t have been more than three hours.
Everything feels off.
At least until Rosie comes running straight toward us as the door opens. She jumps at my legs, begging for attention that I’m all too happy to give her right now.
“Hey, Rosie,” I murmur and scoop her up, holding her tight against my chest.
Liam smiles softly but neither of us says anything.
There’s not much to talk about right now.
Everything is up to the judge, so we’ll wait to hear back over the next few weeks.
It will be their decision if anyone is charged, but I can file a protective order against Stefan now.
The officers, and Mia, strongly encouraged me too.
I’ve already made up my mind and admitted to Liam I should have done it sooner.
Those words were hard to get out but it felt important.
He quickly quieted my anxieties, reminding me that none of this is my fault.
I know that. Maybe I shouldn’t have slapped Stefan, but he certainly should not have kissed me.
Now, all I want is as much space from him as possible.
Ruby didn’t make a decision, at least not while we were there. I offered to get her a hotel room in Aurora Hills, or to stay with my mom or me. She declined but accepted Mia’s help. It stung but that’s not fair to put on Ruby; it has to be weird for the ex-wife to be offering her home and family.
Still, I left Ruby with my business card and let her know the door is always open for her.
It has to be enough.
Setting Rosie down, I follow Liam into the kitchen and accept the glass of water he slides toward me.
“How are you feeling, honey?” His concern wraps around me like an old, favorite sweater.
Shrugging, I admit, “I don’t know. A lot less shaken than earlier, so I feel okay. But I shouldn’t be ‘okay’ after what happened… I don’t know.”
He shakes his head and steps closer, wrapping his large hands around my waist. “You’re allowed to feel whatever you do, Calypso. ‘Fine’ right now doesn’t necessarily mean ‘fine’ later, and that’s okay.”
I nod and twist my hands. “Yeah. I guess so. I’m worried about Ruby.”
“Right now,” he slowly starts, “Mia can do a lot more for her than we can. Let’s hope Ruby comes around and takes your offer.”
I’ve told myself the same thing hundreds of times tonight. I wish we could go back in time and create a different outcome for the evening.
My hand glides up his chest and wraps around the back of his neck. “Can you do me a favor?”
His brows furrow and he pulls me closer. “Of course, honey—anything you need.”
“Tell me again,” I whisper. “I want to hear you say it again.”
It takes a few seconds for realization to wash over him, and his mouth pops open in surprise. Liam hasn’t said those three words in the last month, and I certainly haven’t asked him to repeat them.
I thought maybe once was enough. Liam could say how he feels and I’d accept it.
Then neither of us would be tortured again by him having to continuously repeat it, and me not having the guts to say it back.
Showing him in other ways is much easier for me.
Every time we have sex, or when we cook together, or our nights on the couch with Rosie.
All of that is what’s comfortable for me.
After tonight, I’m so out of sorts that the only thing I want is Liam.
I don’t want the last person to ever say they love me to be Stefan. Maybe not the last person ever, but I don’t want to think of those words and associate them with him for another second.
Stefan’s declaration left me feeling slimy, immediately in need of a shower. Then to have his lips on mine again… I shudder at the memory.
“Will you please say it again?” I whisper.
He nods lightly. “I love you, Calypso. So fucking much. And I’m not going anywhere.”
My lips part, slowly growing the courage to say it back. His words wash away the lingering stickiness left by my ex-husband. It’s going to be a long time until things are “okay,” and longer to really be over, but there are some problems Liam has the ability to fix now.
Starting with the way Stefan sounds, and tastes.
Liam continues, “The only life I want is the one that includes you. I don’t want children, I don’t care about marriage. Commitment comes in many forms, and our routines make me feel more tied to you than an engagement ring ever could.”
A smile peeks through. “That’s good—because I won’t change my mind on kids or marriage. I don’t want any of that. A bigger house and another small dog?” I tilt my head back and forth. “Maybe I could be persuaded."
The gorgeous, affectionate grin that Liam reserves only for me pulls at his lips.
Honestly, the small space is fine. We rarely feel as if we are stepping all over each other but Liam has a large family.
If I wasn’t in the same city as my siblings, I’d want there to always be a room open to them.
Plus, Jake and Stella are getting to the ages where they want to spend less time at home.
I love both of those kids and wouldn’t mind having them over more often.
We aren’t in a rush to make any big changes, which makes what I’m about to say easier. Knowing we are both open to the possibilities is more than enough for the time being.
I open my mouth, finally ready to return the sentiment, when Liam gently pushes his finger against my lips. “There’s one more thing.” My brows furrow at his serious tone. “I wanted to tell you after Vivi’s wedding, but it felt important to show you.”
“Okay…? Show me what?” I watch him slide open the junk drawer and pull out a legal envelope.
Silently, Liam lays the contents on the counter in front of me. It takes me a few seconds to understand what I’m looking at…
Medical records?
Hesitantly, I pick up the pages and flip through them. There’s a lot of information I don’t understand, and it seems like this is a full record; I’m waiting for something to jump out at me. Then I see it.
My gaze flies to Liam’s. “This says—you had a vasectomy? When?”
“About a year ago,” he says with a shrug. “Hannah and I wanted different things—and I didn’t want to find myself in a situation I couldn’t get out of, because I’d never want to be an absent father either.”
I shake my head but quickly nod instead, knowing Liam would be an amazing father if he ever found himself in that situation. But he’s done everything he can to avoid it.
“And you didn’t tell me because…?” I trail off.
Stepping closer, he reaches for my waist and pulls me flush against him.
“Because my words wouldn’t be enough—not after what Stefan did to you.
I’m not showing you this because I want anything with our sex life to change.
I want you to know that we’re on the same page.
So you know I will never take advantage of you, or your body. ”
My mouth pops open. He’s right—this means much more to me than him simply telling me he had the procedure done. I don’t know if I would have been able to believe him, no matter how much I would have wanted to.
“I love you.” My hand caresses his jaw as I look up at him, holding eye contact. “I’m sorry I make it so hard sometimes—”
Liam immediately shakes his head. “Don’t do that.”
Rolling my eyes, I run my thumb over his lips. “Fine. Then thank you for being so patient, and understanding, especially when you didn’t always agree with my choices.”
He nods in acceptance of the new sentiment. “I’d wait ten lifetimes if that’s what you needed.”
“No, I don’t need that long.” Standing on my tip-toes, I brush my lips against his, deepening it for only a second. “I’m ready now. I’m still going to be infuriating most days, and I will always push your buttons.”
“Good.” His bright blue eyes are burning like the center of a flame.
With a teasing grin, I slip out of his hold. “Your news is actually very much on theme for the night.”
“How so?”
“I wanted to give this to you earlier,” I admit and pull a cake box out of the fridge. “I saw it on Pinterest and thought it was cheeky.”
With a curious smile, Liam lifts the top off and his head immediately tips back on a laugh. The vanilla cake is decorated with white buttercream frosting and little red hearts, but in the center is a message for Liam: I love your dick.
“This is a work of fucking art.” He stares at the cake with amusement before looking at me with the familiar mix of heated desire and soft affection that never fails to make my body hum in response.
“I love it even more now,” I say and lift on my toes to place a kiss on his jaw. “I love your dick.”
Nipping at my lip, he keeps me in place as he swipes vanilla frosting across my lips before licking it off.
Taking a deep breath, I whisper, “I want to be yours, Liam.”
The only response I get is his arms wrapping around me and his mouth crashing against mine in the fiercest kiss I’ve ever shared with someone. My body melts against his, finally releasing some of the tension from earlier.
My fingers grip his short hair, pulling him in closer. I want him to erase the feel of Stefan’s hands on me and the bitter taste of his kiss. As Liam’s tongue tangles with mine and his strong hands squeeze my hips, I almost forget I have an ex-husband.
Here, in our kitchen with Liam and Rosie, I feel safe and comfortable.
I feel loved.
Liam breaks the kiss, pulling back enough to meet my eye. “What do you want right now?”
“You,” I quietly admit. “And a shower.”
Chuckling, he grabs the back of my thighs and picks me up. “I can make both of those things happen.”
There’s so much left to figure out, but at this very moment, nothing else feels important.