Chapter 15 Luna
Luna
Notebook: Happiness feels weird. But I think I’m starting to like it.
It’s been three days since the Damien incident.
Three days of him avoiding me completely. Three days of Hudson watching me like I might bolt, of Axel’s stare making me forget how to walk correctly, breathe normally, or form coherent sentences.
I spent three days finding perfect gifts outside my door: a book about wolf mythology with highlighted passages, homemade blueberry muffins still warm, that come with cute little notes, like, “Just thinking of you. -E.”
And three days of Oli being… Oli.
Which is why I’m hiding in the game room with him, pretending everything’s normal.
I grip the controller tightly, my hand cramping as I mash the buttons. “Take that, carrot-boy!” I yell, landing a devastating combo on Oli’s fighter.
“Hey now, Luna, no need to get personal!” He leans in, his shoulder brushing mine as he attempts to counter my attack. “Just because my hair is auburn doesn’t mean—”
“It’s not just the hair.” I grin wickedly. “You literally ate twelve baby carrots during the last round. Twelve!”
“They’re healthy!” His ears turn red, matching his hair. “And crunchy. And… shut up!”
“You’re double carrot-boy now,” I tease.
“That’s not how nicknames work!”
“You have a stash in your hoodie pocket right now.”
“I do not… okay, maybe I do.”
“Carrot. Boy.”
“I mean, lots of people like carrots!”
His nose twitches frantically, and I narrow my eyes.
“You’re getting weirdly defensive about this.”
“No, I’m not!” His nose twitches. “I just think vegetable-shaming is excessive!”
“Is that a thing?”
“It is now! And just for that—” His character executes a perfect finishing move. “KO! That’s what you get for the double insult!”
“Did you just win while eating another carrot?”
“…Maybe.”
Oli’s infectious laughter fills the room. Those adorable dimples appear as he grins at me, his feet thumping excitedly like he’s doing a sitting rendition of Flashdance.
I toss the controller aside, crossing my arms with a huff. “I demand a rematch.”
“Sure thing, Luna,” Oli says softly, his voice suddenly serious. His gaze lingers on me, and the lightness in the room shifts. But it’s gone as fast as it started.
We continue to play, elbows jostling for dominance, but my mind wanders. I glance at Oli and catch him watching me, a soft smile tugging at his lips, his nose twitching slightly.
“What?” I ask, narrowing my eyes in mock suspicion.
He shrugs. “It’s just good to see you like this.”
“Like what?” I prompt, though my heart already knows the answer.
“Laughing. Relaxed. Happy.”
The word happy lands heavier than I expect, and my smile falters.
Happy. When did that happen?
Sensing the shift, Oli nudges me gently with his elbow. “I can teach you the karate kick, you know. It might help you stop getting your characters killed every five seconds.”
“Maybe not tonight,” I say, still lost in my thoughts.
“We’ve got all the time in the world for rematches. This is your home now, remember?”
The word home echoes in my mind, stirring something deep inside me that I’m not quite ready to face. I look away, swallowing hard, focusing on a random spot on the wall.
“Hey.” Oli’s voice pulls me back. His hand gently grabs mine. “What’s wrong?”
I meet his gaze. “It’s just… It’s been a long time since I’ve had a real home.”
Oli nods. “Well, you’ve got one now, Luna. I promise I’ll fill it with so many Xbox rematches and bad jokes you’ll beg for alone time.”
I laugh. “Is that a threat, Oliver?”
He grins, reaching for his controller again. “You bet, Silver. And just so you know, I’m happy you’re here. The guys all grew up together; they have a special bond. They’re great, but they mostly see me as the younger brother. It’s nice to have someone my age… Not that they’re old or anything.”
“I get it,” I reply, my smile brightening.
“Ready for a rematch?”
I pick up my controller, but the feeling of contentment lingers. For the first time in years, I feel… safe.
“Sure am. The question is, are you ready to lose?” I tease.
As the game begins, I become acutely aware of his thighs. Every time they brush up against mine, my heart flips. It’s been ages since I’ve let someone in, and I’ve definitely let Oli in.
“Ha! Take that!” Oli whoops as his character lands a hit.
I try to focus, but my thoughts are on Oli.
“You’re distracted,” he murmurs, his voice low and playful. “What’s wrong, Luna? Can’t handle the heat?”
I turn to retort, but the words evaporate on my lips. Oli’s face hovers inches from mine, his eyes searching mine.
My heart hammers against my ribs. “Oli…”
“I know I’m just the younger brother.” His hand finds mine, tentative. “But Luna, when I look at you…”
“What?” The word is barely a breath.
“I forget how to breathe properly. I knock things over. I burn food. Hell, I walked into a wall yesterday because you smiled at me.”
I laugh softly, losing myself in those blue depths.
Oli inches closer, his gaze dropping to my lips. My heart pounds against my ribs, and I can feel the warmth of his breath brushing over my skin.
“I really, really want to kiss you, and I’ve never kissed anyone before, so I’ll probably be terrible at it, but—”
“Oli!”
He stops rambling, eyes wide.
“Just kiss me already.”
His whole face transforms with wonder. “Really?”
“Yes.”
“Oh! Okay. Um…” He shifts closer, then stops. “Wait, which way do I… do I tilt left or right? And what do I do with my hands? And—”
I silence him by cupping his face and pulling him to meet me.
Our lips meet, and it’s… a disaster.
Our noses bump. Hard.
“Ow,” he mumbles against my mouth.
“Sorry—”
“No, I’m sorry—”
We’re both apologizing and laughing and still trying to kiss, and somehow that makes it perfect.
“Wait, let me…” He tilts his head the other way, and suddenly it works.
His lips are soft and tentative, asking permission with every gentle press. I sigh into his mouth, and he makes this little sound—surprise mixed with want—that sends heat spiraling through me.
“Is this okay?” he whispers against my lips.
“More than okay.”
His hand comes up to cup my face, thumb brushing my cheekbone with devastating gentleness. The kiss deepens, and while it’s still clumsy, there’s something raw and honest about it that makes my chest ache.
When his tongue tentatively brushes my bottom lip, I gasp, and he starts to pull back.
“Sorry, was that—”
I fist his shirt and pull him back. “Don’t you dare apologize.”
This time when we kiss, it’s hungrier. His arms wrap around me, pulling me closer until I’m practically in his lap. His hands are shaking slightly where they rest on my waist, like he can’t believe he’s touching me.
My wolf presses against my skin, humming with approval. My body tingles everywhere his lips touch, like sparks racing through my veins.
“Luna,” he breathes between kisses. “You taste like… sunshine?”
I laugh against his mouth. “That doesn’t make sense.”
“Nothing about this makes sense.” He pulls back to look at me, eyes wide with wonder.
“I mean, the others… they’re all…”
“They’re all what?”
“More experienced. Older. Probably better at… everything.”
“Everything?”
His cheeks flame. “You know what I mean. Axel probably has a whole repertoire of crazy moves. Ethan’s probably studied techniques. Hudson could just command you to come. And Damien…” he trails off. “I’m just me. Awkward, inexperienced, and I’m probably terrible at it.”
“First of all,” I say, counting on my fingers, “That was also my first kiss. Axel’s ‘moves’ would probably involve that stupid axe somehow. Ethan would bring charts. Hudson barely talks to me. And Damien actively hates me.”
“He doesn’t—”
“Second, the arrangement is what it is, but I’m not a toy to be passed around. I choose who and when and how.”
“You choose me?” he asks, his voice cracking. My chest aches, because how could I not?
“Yes, I choose you.”
His smile broadens, and those endearing dimples deepen. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I breathe, tugging him closer for another kiss.
This time, it’s deeper, more confident.
A moan escapes me as my hands tangle in his hair.
He pulls me closer, his arms solid and warm, encircling me in a cocoon of safety and desire.
The kiss is everything. My body hums with excitement, but it intertwines with a darker sensation.
Fear. Doubt.
A quiet voice stirs in the back of my mind.
What if he changes his mind? What if one day he looks at me the way Conrad did… and decides I’m not worth it?