12. From Drowning to Mountaintops
From Drowning to Mountaintops
A few days later, when the summer sun was almost too bright, Bridger drove toward Bozeman to go swimming at Rocky Creek with Bennet, Avery, and Coop—his oldest friends.
While Max and Gus had taken up most of Bridger’s time recently, Avery, Bennet, and Coop had been Bridger’s best boys since preschool.
All four teenagers dashed to the center of the rusty rural bridge over Rocky Creek’s swimming hole, shed their street clothes, and cannonballed into the water below.
Laughter echoed along the creek and nearby forest as the friends swam, splashed, and dunked each other in the water.
“These last couple of weeks, we’ve barely seen you,” Avery remarked, splashing Bridger.
“Yeah, I almost forgot what your face looked like,” Bennet chimed in.
The four boys all treaded water as they shot the shit. Even this far out of town, their quick conversations always returned to skateboarding.
“Skating’s been rough,” Coop said. “Max showing off sucks without you there to make us laugh about it.”
“I’ve been busy,” Bridger replied, not wanting to share more.
“Making skateboards with Gus?” Avery pressed, curiosity piqued.
“I guess, yeah. But it was too much work,” Bridger explained. “I just need a break.”
“It’ll be worth it for those badass boards he’s making us,” Avery responded. “That’s still happening, right?
Bridger nodded, but he didn’t even truly know that answer himself.
“Isn’t Gus sorta a nerd?” Coop ventured.
Avery shrugged. “He’s chill, I like him.”
“I heard he’s gay,” Bennet added.
The world stopped. Bridger forgot to tread water and slipped under for a second. Recovered. Shit.
“He is a bit…” Coop said before limping his wrist.
Who’s saying that about Gus? Shit.
The other boys’ nonchalant voices distorted in Bridger’s ears as he struggled to play it cool, terrified of that word being brought up by any of his friends.
“It’s not a rumor if only Max thinks so. Max calls everything gay,” Avery joked casually.
“Gus is leaving soon, right?” Coop asked, turning to Bridger.
However, Bridger was fully out of it, not paying attention, still worried about the boys even mentioning Gus and gay. Two thoughts he was currently trying to avoid.
“Bridger? …Hello?” Coop leaned in.
The other boys, quizzical, all looked over.
“Earth to Bridger!” Avery splashed him.
Bridger snapped out of his haze. “What?”
“Your friend Gus is leaving for some fancy college soon, right?” Coop inquired.
“He’s not really my friend,” Bridger replied distantly. “But yeah, he’s going to Rhode Island.”
“Good for him. I’m stuck here forever,” Avery lamented.
“Yeah. I almost flunked last year.” Bennet laughed. “I’m not going anywhere important.”
Bridger shook his head with annoyance. “Who cares about college?! I don’t wanna think about anything past this summer. I just wanna chill with you guys. No more distractions!”
The three friends exchanged puzzled looks.
“Distractions?” Bennet spoke up.
“Did something more happen with Sophia since the bonfire?” Avery prodded.
“Or did she think your dick was too small and dump you?” Coop teased.
The boys all laughed.
Oh, right. Sophia. Shit.
Bridger feigned a boastful nonchalance to play along. “Nah, I’m too much man for Sophia,” he retorted with a grin. The others all scoffed.
“Yeah, right!”
“My ass!”
“Fine. Sure. Sophia fizzled out.” Bridger chuckled, back to feeling normal.
“Makes sense. She’s too hot for us, just like all of Tara’s friends.”
“Yeah, we can only get medium-level chicks.”
“Speak for yourselves. Rachel and I are still fuckin’,” Coop boasted, prompting eye rolls.
“Exactly. Medium-level chicks,” Bridger joked.
All the guys laughed at Coop and ganged up to splash him. Bridger smiled, feeling comfortable. Too comfortable.
“Besides, I’m into someone new,” Bridger let slip.
Immediately, his friends pounced on him for more information.
“Really?! Who? Kelly?”
Fuck!
“Kiana?”
“Trish? That girl that works at the diner?”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Bridger deflected, waving them away.
“You brought it up!” Coop shouted in jest.
“I hear Max is planning a rager for his birthday in a week or so,” Bridger interjected.
Avery laughed. “Dude, don’t change the subject!”
“Who’s the girl?” Coop pressed on.
“Stephanie? Jess? Beth from math class?” Bennet listed off. “I can go all day.”
The boys moved closer, surrounding Bridger so he couldn’t escape.
Fuck. I can’t tell them anything, Bridger fretted. They’ll blab all around town.
“I’m not saying who! Fuck off!” Bridger said, defensive again.
“Why?” Bennet shrugged. “She ugly?”
Bridger laughed uncomfortably as all the guys stared at him, not letting up. He didn’t know what to say. Fuck!
Frantically wanting to escape, Bridger dropped beneath the river’s surface. He held his breath under the water, opened his eyes, and saw the wavy, undulating forms of his friends still pestering him to name his girl.
Cooper laughed from above. “That’s it. She must be an uggo.”
“Maybe she’s one of Max’s ex-hookups?” Avery suggested. “He’d keep that a secret.”
Coop scoffed. “He’s just being a wuss.”
“We’ll get it eventually,” Bennet assured them.
Bridger still couldn’t ignore all their digs, not even underneath the water.
I’m such an idiot.
Bridger felt like crying and screaming all at once. He had no way out. He wanted to stay submerged and never go back up. His lungs burned, but Bridger didn’t care. He’d rather drown right here in the river than let his friends know he—that he—
Fuck! Bridger cursed down with the minnows. Fuck them, man. They’re not getting shit out of me.
“Bridger?” Avery waved at him through the water’s barrier, “Come back up, man.”
“Yeah, dude.” Bennet sounded worried. “It’s been a long time.”
“Quit being dramatic, man,” Coop piled on.
The three boys exchanged curious, puzzled expressions. Bridger had never acted like this around them before.
Bridger was lost on what to do. They’re never gonna give up now. Bridger’s whole chest threatened to collapse. If they find out I… that I… like Gus. It’s all over.
His throat started closing in on itself. But Bridger would rather die right here than look like an idiot in front of the guys.
They can’t know. I’ll never live it down. They’ll tell everyone.
“Dude! Come up,” Avery called to him. “Quit joking.”
Bennet fell into a panic. “He’s gonna drown down there.”
“I’m pullin’ him out.” Coop grabbed Bridger’s arm and yanked.
Bridger resisted. He planted his feet in the rocky sand and leaned back with all his weight. I’m not gonna let them make fun of me. His lips were turning blue. There was a weird pain in his right eye.
“Bridger?! What the fuck!” Coop called out when he failed to pull Bridger up. “Guys, help me!”
All three of Bridger’s oldest friends grabbed his arm in a morbid game of tug-of-war, struggling to tow him above the surface.
A sleepy lightheadedness overcame Bridger. It was… nice.
“PULL HARDER!”
Avery?
For a second, Bridger closed his eyes.
With a splash and three loud grunts, the boys lifted their friend with their combined strength back above the river’s surface.
The three friends immediately cursed at Bridger as he flailed and coughed and swallowed water in all the commotion.
He immediately hacked up the liquid that hit his throat and took a deep breath, finally letting fresh oxygen re-enter his lungs.
Bridger wished he were still drowning.
“Dude! Are you psychotic?!” Coop berated him.
“Bridger, that was not cool,” Bennet complained.
The guys all backed away from Bridger to give him some space.
“Then just leave me the fuck alone!” Bridger blurted out. “Stop asking me questions.”
Silence fell amongst the four in the river. All that remained was the buzz of cicadas and the rustle of trees from the light wind.
“Dude, we don’t actually care who you’re crushing on,” Avery softened. “Calm down.”
“Yeah right.” Bridger, still angry, didn’t believe him.
“Well, it’s not worth you doing that…” Avery breathed.
“Yeah, man. It’s whatever. We’re all friends here.” Coop shrugged. “Girls can’t get between us.”
“Even if she’s Beth from math class,” Bennet joked, trying to lighten the mood.
Bridger paused. His heart beat so fast that he had to gasp again for air. It was this, or perhaps his frustration, that made the words spill out before he could even catch himself.
“What if it’s not a girl?”
Bennet scratched his head. Coop and Avery locked eyes. Then their mouths fell open slowly. The boys all waded forward again.
“What do you mean?” Avery grilled Bridger.
“Like a g-guy?” Coop choked.
“I… I don’t know.” Bridger started to shut down again.
“Yes you do,” Avery countered.
“Promise you won’t tell!” Bridger got a bit aggressive, raising his voice. “Not anyone!”
Avery splashed backward. “Dude, quit freakin’ me out.”
“We’ll keep it locked up.”
Bennet nodded. “Just you and us.”
Bridger closed his eyes, then took a long, deep sigh. He could not believe he was even considering telling them. These idiots are going to ruin my life. But…
The lying, the secrets… It was all becoming too hard. Bridger was tired. He couldn’t take it anymore.
“I may have… had a thing. A weird moment,” Bridger shared softly.
Bennet shook his head. “I’m confused.”
“With a guy?” Avery pressed. “Which guy?”
“I didn’t say a guy,” Bridger evaded.
“Is it Gus?” Coop said what everyone was thinking.
“No!” Shit! It was all happening too fast for him. “I mean, we…”
Avery’s eyes widened and he punched Bennet beside him. “It IS Gus!”
“Woah.” Bennet rubbed his sore arm, mouth agape.
“You’re GAY?!” Coop exclaimed.
Bridger’s stomach fell to his feet. He should have just drowned. He could not handle this.
I gotta get out of here. Now.
“I’m leaving,” Bridger declared.
Embarrassed and angry at himself, Bridger turned to swim toward shore. He’d only made it a few strokes before his friends cornered him again.
“Bridger, stop!” Avery called out.
“Dude! Don’t leave,” Coop yelled.
Bridger turned around, dead with his emotions. He braced for more jokes, more taunting. For worse. He glared at each of them.