CHAPTER 11
I’m walking to my room when I hear Lana putting a chair by the door, as she does every night.
I roll my eyes. That’s not enough to keep me away from her; she should know that by now.
It was no problem sneaking into her father’s house for almost two months—with her knowing about it—it’s even easier to do it at my place.
Or does she know, and that’s why she doesn’t shut the window? My heart flutters at that thought.
Once in my room, I turn on the computer and go through new reports, send out more search warrants, and open an investigation procedure in Ireland. I need information about all cases where Declan and Erik might be involved.
The Müller family has been missing since I brought Lana here.
I trust my men will find them before they’re back on the map.
That entire family is a menace. They are aware of my feelings for Lana and understand that I wouldn’t be able to touch her, especially after Finn’s birth.
Regardless of my attempts to get her out of that place, they were more prepared than I expected.
I lost dozens of men trying to distract them, and they’re going to pay—every single one of those bastards who pull their puppet strings.
I won’t use Lana to find them. Not unless they’re a threat to her and Finn. If I must betray her trust to keep them safe, I’ll do it in a heartbeat. I’d rather have her hate me than have her stuck in that hell again.
I’m the one who will win this damn game. Lana will join forces with me. Will it be hard? Fuck yes, but if she knows what’s best for her and who’s loyal to her, then she won’t hesitate to bet everything on me.
I’ll do whatever it takes to avoid bloodshed, but if they strike first, Lana will have to understand that they left me no choice.
I turn off the computer and close my eyes.
She has no idea about her family’s trafficking rings, but she’s so fragile and blinded since I brought her here that I don’t want to break her anymore.
She has worked so hard to recover, to forget.
.. Telling the whole truth will only break her again.
It doesn’t matter if she hates me, if she loves me, or if she either denies it or accepts it; I will give her as much time as she wants to come back to me, because that’s all she needs.
Then she’ll be able to listen. She won’t get through that alone, she won’t think I lied to her, and will accept my help without putting up a fight.
If I do it while her heart is full of hate, she’ll sink into a depression that will cost her precious days with Finn, and will never forgive herself.
She thinks I don’t know her, but I do. I own every inch of her mind, body, and soul, and I won’t let someone else take it away from me because of a misunderstanding where I was also hurt.
But if the time comes, and she decides to leave, even knowing the truth behind it all, with no danger lurking, I will not put up any resistance.
I wouldn’t be able to force a decision like that when she grew up with misconceptions about how love works.
I take a quick shower, and on my way out, I put on my pyjamas.
I leave the house and walk around until I reach her bedroom window, which, like every night, is wide open.
She has been doing this since before I asked her to, when we were engaged.
She never explained why. For a week, I came here to see if she still had this habit, and now it has become a necessity for me to come here every night and watch her sleep.
She doesn’t have to know. I’ve spent almost two years longing to be close to them, with rage and heartbreak guiding me.
Watching them sleep is the only thing that calms my anger these days, even if it means less hours of sleep.
As I enter, my gaze fixes on the bed. Lana and Finn are cuddling with their eyes closed.
I used to wake her up in the middle of the night between screams and tears. A week before the wedding, something changed: she slept well, woke up with a big smile on her face, and nothing could wipe that smile away… But the nightmares came back, and this time not only in her head.
They took her away from me and stole everything from her. They decided to marry her to a stranger—someone who wanted Lana because of her beauty, family status, and because of some stupid alliance they had made.
I knew her. I loved her. I love her. I fell in love as soon as I saw her playing with a little spider on her knee.
When I met her, all that had happened in my life made sense.
It was because of her. To meet her. Not to get revenge, not to rescue people.
Yes, it’s what I enjoy doing, but there was always more to it, and I didn’t see it until that moment.
I followed her as soon as I was discharged from the hospital.
I tried to take care of her as best I could—chasing away and killing any man who wanted to harm her or get close to her, like those fucking suitors her father used to introduce her to at those dinners they attended.
I sneaked into her room, leaving little clues that she never noticed, like those candles she liked, or flowers on her dressing table now and then.
Three years later, she fell in love with me. She was happy with me. We won; we had it all... And now she wants me gone.
I should have risked more for her. I should have called my men to break into the wedding reception. I should have called for backup when they were on their way to a cottage where they spent their wedding night.
I tried to rescue her, but even in my own hospital, it wasn’t safe.
One day was enough for Stefan’s men to take over the place.
I checked the cameras at all hours. They got into every room except Lana’s.
I relocated all the patients a week prior to prevent their abuse.
Nurses and doctors were the only ones working because they needed the medical care for Lana and Finn.
They were all in there voluntarily, knowing what they were capable of doing.
Nothing I did was enough.
Groaning, I bring a chair in front of the bed and sit down to admire them.
Lana has one arm on top of Finn. Her skin has no wounds or bruises. Her face has gained some weight and colour, and the dark circles under her eyes have disappeared.
How many times did she skip meals? How many times did she choose to give Finn attention instead of making herself lunch? Did she get enough sleep? Did Stefan sometimes tell her something about her appearance?
I want to get close to her, hold her, kiss her, cuddle her… I want to give her everything they stole from us.
My gaze settles on Finn. My chest hurts. He won’t remember Stefan, but I’ll remember that he took my place for ten months—and nine more when Lana was expecting him. She went through the whole process by herself, when she had someone who was dying to be there for her.
In a week, Finn will turn one. I’m going to throw him a little party. Lana couldn’t be mad about that, could she?
Finn moves. Lana pulls him closer to her body and sniffs his hair before falling back to sleep. I smile. I’d give everything I have to see them this peaceful for the rest of their lives.
We’ll start over as the family we promised each other the last night we spent together… I just need some time to get her back.