SIX
Rivers had no business watching the sway of Caryssa’s hips as she ran. Knowing that didn’t stop him.
Then he’d gone and kissed her and ruined any fragile link that might be growing between them again.
He sat on the edge of his bed, elbows braced on his knees, his cock as hard as steel.
He couldn’t have her, not after what he’d done. Monk and Rome, and men from other Blackout teams, might have changed the rules to meet their needs, but even if he chose that path, Caryssa would never be his.
Fuck.
The urge to spill his guts to her, to break his non-disclosure agreement and explain why he walked out of her life the way he had, burned through him.
He stared at the concrete floor between his feet until his eyes blurred. He blinked to clear his vision, but nothing would erase the image of Caryssa in his head.
Her on the treadmill, sprinting at a punishing incline and pace, her ponytail swinging with every stride. She’d always been the sexiest woman he’d ever seen, but there was a confidence in the way she moved now that made her harder to look away from.
Then there was the way she looked at him—as if she hated him and wanted him in the same breath.
The moment their gazes met, he wanted to cross the gym and show her precisely how long six years of wanting could build up in one man.
Then he couldn’t hold back another second and kissed her. The soft crush of her lips against his and her taste had him shaking for so much more, and it ended too soon.
He told himself it had to be enough, even as he knew one taste wouldn’t begin to quench the need inside him.
Cutting his fingers through his hair, he issued a low curse. Sleep was out of the question at this early hour and he wasn’t in the mood to play poker or hang with the guys who would make jabs about his former relationship.
What he needed was a cold shower, even though he already knew it wouldn’t do much. He’d taken more cold showers because of Caryssa than he cared to admit.
With a low sigh, he grabbed a towel from the foot of his bed and headed down the hall. His footsteps were soft as he passed the common room where Jolie and Stina sat cross-legged on the floor, backs against the sofa, deep in some crochet project. They didn’t look up.
He headed down the hall past equipment closets and storage rooms, his mind still tangled in the memory of his mouth on Caryssa’s. He was three steps past the women’s shower when he registered running water.
And the ladies were occupied with their yarn.
He jerked to a halt, pulse hammering with the only logical reason the water could be running.
Caryssa was in there.
He told himself he should have kept walking as he grabbed the doorknob and twisted. When it turned easily, his heart surged against his ribs.
His body blazed with possibilities that had everything to do with her being naked and wet and them being alone.
Had everything to do with two kisses that weren’t nearly enough.
The door swung open, and steam rolled out to meet him.
There she was beneath the far showerhead, water sluicing down her bare skin.
Gloriously fucking naked.
Her head was tipped back, eyes closed. Suddenly, she jerked toward him.
Through the steam, her stare met his. Neither of them moved.
“Occupied.”
“I see that.”
“You can leave.”
“I can.” His cock pulsed against his fly.
“Or…” The moment stretched on. “You could stay.” Her voice was husky with an emotion that wasn’t quite anger anymore.
He didn’t hesitate a beat. He stepped into the room and twisted the lock behind him.
He stripped fast, holding her gaze the whole time. When he tossed his shirt aside, she raked her gaze over his chest and abs and her eyes flared with an appreciation that made his blood heat.
He toed off his socks and worked open his fly, driven faster by the flood of need in his veins. As soon as he shoved his cargo pants and boxer briefs down his hips, his cock sprang free, stiff and flushed with desire.
Caryssa’s lips parted in a silent gasp, and a flush climbed over her cheeks. As he crossed the tile to her with no words left worth saying, she turned to fully face him.
She trembled under the spray, water running in rivulets over her creamy skin he’d dreamed about touching more nights than he’d ever admit out loud. Her nipples were drawn into tight peaks, pink with wanting him as much as he wanted her.
He strode right up to her and framed her face in both hands. Sliding his fingers into her soaked hair, he slammed his mouth over hers.
She moaned against his lips, the noise an electric current to his senses.
He kissed her deep, years of wanting this moment breaking loose at once. Christ, he was beginning to wonder if he really was alive, or whether this was all a dream.
Drawing on her lips and tongue, he threw himself into showing her that he never, ever, in a million years, could have forgotten her. If there was a way to prove he wouldn’t rather be dead than married to her, he would show her now.
Into every stroke of his tongue, he poured out his grief. Into every brush of his lips, he told her that his dream about a house and a yard and her laugh trickling from the kitchen still left him aching.
He hadn’t touched another woman since he lost her. And he didn’t know—didn’t want to know—whether she’d been touched by another man.
Right now, with her wet and shaking, kissing him back and meaning every soft moan she made, nothing else mattered.
He tugged gently at her hair, angling her head back, and she gasped.
Barely gripping his control, he followed the arch of her throat with his mouth, tasting water and pure Caryssa.
He nipped and sucked his way down to her collarbone, and lower.
He let his eyes slip closed, reveling in the moment and holding it tight in his mind so he’d never forget a single kiss he spattered over her skin.
He cupped her breast and lifted the tip to his mouth. Without hesitation, he drew it between his lips and sucked the hard peak.
“Ohh.” She planted a hand against the back of his head, holding him there, breath coming fast as water showered over both of them.
He slid one hand down the slick line of her body, relearning her shape. Her body was tighter from running but soft in all the right places, just as he remembered. He molded his hand to the natural curve of her stomach and spread his fingers across her hip, curling around it for a heartbeat.
But he craved so much more and slid his hand between her thighs to cup her pussy.
She was ready for him, slippery and hot, want written plainly across every inch of her beautiful face and thrumming in the pulse going crazy at her throat.
He held her gaze for long seconds as the water rushed over them, wanting her to see exactly how much he’d needed this—needed her—before he gave her what they’d been circling since the moment she stepped onto this base.
With a twist of his lips, he held her steady.
And thrust two fingers inside her clenching heat.
* * * * *
At the familiar callused feel of Reid’s fingers stretching her, a hot gasp escaped her. Her mind swam with the insanely tight tug of her insides, and she dropped her forehead against his chest, panting.
Her inner walls pulsated as he began to finger her in a slow rhythm that burned away any inhibitions she may have left about sleeping with her ex.
Was he really her ex if they never broke up? The thought splintered into fragments and scattered as he fingered her faster, in hard pulses. Over and over again, he reminded her that she was a woman.
Her insides knotted, and she went on tiptoe, reaching higher for the stars he showed her still existed after all this time.
His mouth crashed over hers again, taking, sucking, tongue delving until she shook. Needing to feel him too, she curled her fingers around his stiff length.
The growl that rumbled through him sent liquid heat straight to her pussy. She gave him another slow stroke in response. Had he always been this big? This thick? This—
She only got one more jack in before he settled his hand over her own and plucked it off his cock. In a blindingly swift move, he pinned her hand to the wall over her head and thrust his fingers deep inside her again.
They’d always had hot sex, but this…oh god, she swore the tile was melting off the walls. The way he dominated her, commanded her body, her mouth, the very noises she made, sent a rush through her that she’d never known before.
She couldn’t control her shudders of bliss as she began to climb higher. Higher. Higher yet.
His brown eyes blazed down into hers as he strummed the rough pad of his thumb across her clit.
“Oh!” She rolled against him, seeking more, more, more. And he gave it to her, pressing where she needed it most, with the exact pressure that would carry her to heights she wasn’t sure she’d survive.
The knot inside her core snapped, and she spiraled into a wave of ecstasy as her orgasm ripped through her. Hot tremors stole her mind, and she lost herself in the moment.
With another groan, he claimed her mouth, muffling her cries and feeding them back to her on her tongue in heated strokes. When her body succumbed to him, he withdrew his fingers from her throbbing pussy and lifted her, pinning her to the wall.
In one hard glide, he filled her with his cock.
Her mind snapped to attention at the feel of him rooted deep inside her. “What about protection?”
“I’m clean. And I don’t give a damn about anything but having you.”
This was the man she knew, and she wanted all of him.
She gripped his shoulders and anchored him close as he began to take her in a series of wild thrusts that stole her mind all over again. Surrounded by steam and warm water and the man she swore she’d love until her own dying day, she let herself live for the now.
Her lips found his, and she kissed him with all the passion she never believed she’d be able to show him again as he drove them both toward an end that could burn down the whole world.
His muscles bunched under her hands, tensing and releasing, and she clung tight to him.
Just when she felt that tension she’d forgotten existed when he was about to come apart, he withdrew his cock. She gasped and tried to pull him in again, but he lifted her as though she weighed no more than a water droplet and lowered her to the floor.
“What—” She never got the words out because her lover dropped to his knees, grasped her by the hips and buried his tongue in her pussy.
An explosion of pleasure struck her. She threw her head back with a long moan and gave herself up to him.
He sucked on her clit, and she went wild, bucking into his tongue. When he filled her with two fingers again, reaching deep to a point that made her pussy flood, his groan vibrated against her flesh.
He licked with soft strokes and flicked until she couldn’t breathe, and swirled his tongue in ways that made her body float. When her release struck again, she tossed her head back with a cry that echoed around the room.
Long seconds seemed to pass. Or maybe it was hours. All she knew was her lungs couldn’t find enough air as her mind splintered and her body erupted with flames.
And she still couldn’t get enough.
She pressed her palm into his broad chest and they rose together. Standing inches apart, not touching, they simply stared into each other’s eyes. Then she pushed him down on the shower seat.
His eyes burned with a want that shook her as she straddled his body.
Their heads bowed together as she sank over him. In one smooth shove, she took every inch of his cock.
Now there was no going slow. It was hard, fast, mouths fused. It was hands everywhere, breathless, desperate.
She’d dreamed of this after he was gone. Now she had him—
And that fury still burned right alongside her need.
She raked her short nails over his shoulders, wishing she could cause him the pain he’d caused her as she rode him harder.
He caught the point of her chin between his thumb and forefinger, bringing her gaze up to meet his.
“Let it out, Ryss. Take it out on me if you want, but we’re going to settle things between us.” He locked her tight against him.
She crushed her lips to his and muttered, “Like hell.”
The storm raged out of control inside her, inside him. His body tensed, his cock surging deeper as both of them reached the pinnacle their bodies demanded.
Liquid heat splashed her inner walls, and her pussy clamped around his length, milking him again and again as her core unraveled for him.
And her heart cracked open.
Dammit.