Chapter 24
Anastasia
After docking Zane’s boat at a marina in Norfolk, Virginia, Sawyer and I hopped on a plane and made the trip back to South Carolina. The flight was only an hour and a half, but it felt like forever as I stared out the window, wondering just what the future holds.
Not for me. But for Jack. For Sawyer.
At least half a dozen times during the drive to the airport, I’d started to tell our driver to turn around. Surely the FBI can handle rescuing Jack, right? But if anything were to happen to him because of me…it’s just not something I could forgive myself for.
I already carry the weight of my silence with Violet.
Will I carry the weight of Jack’s death, too? Sawyer’s?
“You okay?” Sawyer glances back from the passenger seat to where I’m sitting just behind the driver’s seat.
I meet my brother’s gaze in the rearview, then look over at Sawyer. “Not particularly. And you promised to stop asking me that.”
He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Sawyer’s relaxed demeanor is a fallacy, and we both know it. The tension in his shoulders, the set of his jaw when he thinks I’m not looking—he’s worried too.
Which, of course, only makes me feel even more like a fool for doing exactly what this monster wants me to do. Especially at the risk of Sawyer.
“Fair enough.” He straightens in the seat. “Any update on movement outside of the boathouse?”
They’d used the coordinates Sawyer tracked to lock in where the call came from. According to Zane, Jack is being held in an old boathouse just outside of town. Unfortunately, it’s made of metal, so using a thermal camera to verify Jack is actually inside is impossible.
“No. Cowboy’s been watching the place non-stop. And we’ve got no movement on the exterior. The windows are all boarded up, so seeing inside is impossible.”
The two men share a look, and even without being a highly trained Navy SEAL, I can decode it. It might be a trap. Jack could already be dead. Or maybe he was never really there to begin with.
Zane pulls into the back parking lot of my coffee shop and puts the truck into Park. Sawyer climbs out first, his gaze scanning the area around us, before he opens my door.
I don’t miss the way he shields my every movement with his body.
Or the way Zane falls into step right beside me.
Tears prick the corners of my eyes. I’ve done nothing to deserve it, but both my brother and Sawyer would give their lives for me in an instant.
We move into the back entrance, and Sawyer locks the door behind us. The coffee shop is dark, with every shade drawn. Including brand-new ones installed on my large picture windows in front. The same ones shattered by a bullet just over a week ago.
“Sawyer, can I talk to Zane for a minute?” I ask.
“Of course. I’ll take the bags upstairs.” He leans in and kisses me on the cheek, then grabs the bags and heads upstairs. As soon as I hear the door close, I turn toward my brother.
“I know you think this was a mistake.”
“I don’t think it was,” he counters. “I know it was.”
“This is my life.”
“Not anymore. A member of my team—my brother in all ways but blood—is about to march into a trap because you don’t trust me to get your ex-boyfriend out.
” His tone is sharp, angry. “This is literally what I do, Anastasia. And the worst possible thing you could do is give this guy exactly what he wants. We could have sent someone else to that marina to take Sawyer’s place until this was over.
He could have chosen to come back and go on this suicide rescue mission, but you still would have been out of reach. ”
“Except that’s not what he said. He wanted me back here in exchange for Jack’s safety. If I didn’t listen, who’s to say he wouldn’t have killed them both?”
“Whose to say he won’t anyway?” Zane replies coldly.
On any other day, his tone might have annoyed me. Today, though, when I’m already feeling so raw, all it does is add to the weight. Because everything he is saying is right.
“If I have a chance to save Jack, shouldn’t I?
What if we did it your way? What if you, Weston, Ryker, and Garrison all marched in there in your tactical best to get him out and this guy does exactly what he said he would?
What if he managed to take all of you out?
” A tear slips down my cheek. “That’s five lives, Zane. ”
“So, Sawyer is expendable? He’s the easier sacrifice?”
“Of course not!” I scream it, my emotions at a boiling point. “I love him, you idiot! Do you not think this is impossible? Do you not think I haven’t wanted to rethink this whole thing?”
Zane’s demeanor shifts, and he crosses his arms. “You love him.”
I close my eyes. Of course that’s what he would focus on.
“Yes. I love Sawyer. This is impossible, Zane. I didn’t ask for any of this, and I just want it to stop!
I’m at the point now where I want to just let him have me because then everyone else will be safe.
Except...” I trail off. “Sawyer’s dumb enough to go after him anyway. ”
“We all are,” Zane says. “And you letting this monster get you is not even an option.” He’s practically growling the words, and for a moment, I’m thrown back in time. To me, as a little girl who just lost her father, and the sister of a boy who had to grow up way too fast.
“I’m sorry.” I close my eyes. Less than a heartbeat later, strong arms come around me, and my brother pulls me in. I bury my face in his chest and let the emotions I’ve tried so hard to keep in check come pouring out.
“It’s going to be okay. Sawyer will be fine. And as much as this guy wants him there alone, he won’t be.”
“But—” I pull away.
Zane smiles down at me. “Little sister, how quickly you’ve forgotten what it is we are trained to do.
This guy won’t see us. Not until we’re close enough to pull a trigger.
And even then, he’ll only see us if we want him to.
We will make sure both Sawyer and Jack walk away.
Then, we’ll put everything we have into catching this guy. ”
I nod and step back, then wipe my eyes. “I feel better.”
“Good.” He shoves his hands into his pockets. “So, love, huh?”
I smile and roll my eyes. “Shut up.”
He grins, a crooked smile I know better than my own. “Look, you could do so much worse than Sawyer.”
“That’s high praise coming from the guy who once said I dated from a pool of losers.”
“Well.” He shrugs. “You didn’t have the best taste. It’s clear things have improved.”
“Does that mean I have your blessing to date one of your best friends?”
“You’ve always had it.” He grins. “I’m just glad Sawyer actually stepped up. Though, I guess we now have to find something else to mess with him about.”
“Did everyone know but me?”
“Pretty much.” He glances up the stairs.
“I’m going to go gather the team so we can make a plan before Sawyer goes in tonight.
You stay away from windows. We scanned the whole place for bugs and set up cameras around the entire perimeter.
No one is getting within ten yards of this place without us knowing about it.
So long as you stay inside, you’re safe. ”
“I’ll do just that then. I will follow every rule you set until he’s caught.”
“Good. Love you, Anastasia.” He scrunches his face. “And I’m sorry for being a jerk.”
“I love you, too, Zane. And it’s okay. I’m kind of used to it by now.”
He laughs, then turns to leave. As soon as the door closes, I flip the lock and engage the security system. Then, I make my way up the stairs. Even with things as heavy as they are, being home feels right.
It feels—almost normal.
Except, when I push open the door and see Sawyer dressed head to toe in black, that normalcy vanishes.
Wearing black cargo pants, black boots, and a black t-shirt, he looks about ready to march off into battle. Which, I suppose, is exactly what he’s planning on doing.
“I don’t think you should do this,” I blurt, fear of losing him pushing past every single rational thought I had. “Sawyer, there has to be another way. We can’t—”
He closes the distance between us, cups a hand behind my head, and pulls me in so close I can feel his breath on my face. “I love you, too,” he whispers, then slams his mouth down onto mine.
The kiss is soul-stirring.
It sears me straight to the bone, burning through every thought I have until they are completely consumed with the feel of his mouth moving against mine. I open up beneath him, gripping the front of his shirt like it’s the only thing keeping me grounded in the moment.
Desire burns hot and fast within me, turning my blood to a raging inferno running through my veins. The only thing in this world I need is this man right here.
Sawyer.
My best friend.
He pulls away and releases me to run the pad of his thumb over my lower lip. “That’s more of what I had in mind for our first kiss.” He grins. “Not that the hospital bed wasn’t fantastic.”
“Uh-huh.” My mind is spinning, unable to focus on even a single thought. And then his words hit me. “You love me?”
He grins. “You were pretty loud downstairs. I wasn’t trying to listen, but I wanted you to know that we’re on the same page.” Sawyer drops his hand and steps back. “I love you, Anastasia. And given how early it is in our relationship, I’m pretty glad you said it first.” He winks, and I laugh.
“Technically, you did. Since I only said it to Zane.”
“Semantics.” He reaches down and pulls on a tactical vest, then checks his pistol before sliding it into a holster on his hip. “Zane left it all here for me.”
“Sawyer, I have such a bad feeling about this. I don’t—”
“Baby, it’s going to be fine. This is hardly the riskiest mission I’ve been on. Remind me to tell you about that one time in the desert—”
“I’d rather not know if it’s all the same to you. And as far as this one is concerned, just because you survived worse circumstances in the past does not guarantee you’ll survive this one.”
“I can’t let Jack die, either,” he says. “He’s innocent in this. And I can save him.”
“There’s a pit in my stomach, Sawyer.” I press both hands to my stomach, hating that he’s in this position because of me. Zane is right—how can I let Sawyer sacrifice himself for this? How can I place the man I love in the crosshairs, while trusting the word of a murderer?
“Baby.” He moves in close again and cups my cheek. “I just got you. Do you think I’m going anywhere?”
What if you don’t have a choice? But instead, I take a deep breath and place my faith in God’s plan. I can’t see it, but I have to believe it includes a future for Sawyer and me.
“Come home to me. You owe me a date.”
He leans in and kisses me again, gently this time. A taste of what’s to come. “Knox, I’m not going anywhere.”