Chapter 23
TWENTY-THREE
GRAYSON
It takes the better part of an hour to coax Ana into eating more than a few bites of pasta and drinking enough water that I don’t worry she’ll be sick in the night.
She’s docile now, glassy-eyed and slow, leaning heavily on my arm as we guide her down the hall to one of my spare rooms. By the time her head hits the pillow, she’s out cold.
I leave the paperwork on the bedside table with another bottle of water in case she wakes in the night and decides to leave.
I stand there for a moment, staring at her collapsed into the white sheets, limbs tangled, red hair fanned across the pillow.
There’s no anger left in me. Just a deep, aching sorrow.
Ana is as much a casualty of Ashborne Holdings as any factory worker or family forced out of their home by my father’s deals.
She didn’t stand a chance once he decided to use her.
I switch off the light and close the door softly behind me.
“Thank you,” I say quietly to Flic once we’re standing in the hallway. I notice she keeps a respectable distance from me, and I ache to reach out and touch her.
“Any time.” She turns away, already heading toward her room.
“Flic?” I call after her. “Can I explain?”
She pauses and turns, arms crossed, surveying me. “You don’t have to explain, Grayson. You don’t owe me anything.”
“The elevator—I—”
She cuts in. “I knew there was a line you didn’t want to cross. I pushed you. That part is on me.” Her voice softens. “I didn’t understand why you’d put that line there until tonight. But it makes sense now. You’re married.”
A hollow laugh scrapes out of my chest. “On paper, yes. But in no other way. And it’s not the reason I’ve kept my distance, though that’s been getting harder by the day.”
The ghost of a smile touches her lips. “You don’t have to—”
“I want to,” I say, stepping closer. “Please. Let me explain.”
She studies me for a long moment, then nods once.
We move to the couch by the window overlooking the city.
During the day, you can see the river in the gaps between the buildings and bridges filled with traffic.
Tonight there’s only darkness, interrupted by headlights and the glowing windows stretching out like stars across the city.
I sit across from Flic as she curls her legs beneath her and waits for me to talk.
She has every right to demand answers. Instead, she’s quiet.
Giving me the space to gather myself. This isn’t a story I ever thought I’d tell anyone.
Not even Helena or Donny know all the details.
But even if Ana hadn’t shown up tonight, I would’ve told Flic.
I was wrong to believe the truth would make her turn away.
She trusted me tonight. She stood beside me even while my father tried to dismantle me.
So now it’s my turn. I trust her enough to hear this and to understand.
And I trust her to decide what comes next.
“I met Ana when I was living in Paris. I was working on a mixed-use redevelopment on the Left Bank. It was old residential buildings that were at risk of being torn down completely. I was working to preserve the external structure while rebuilding the insides. I’d been there a year by then, and I guess I was lonely. ”
I glance at Flic, then back to the city outside the window.
“We met in a coffee shop. At the time, I thought it was chance. Or maybe fate. Being American in a foreign city, she felt familiar. It was fun at first. Ana was everything I wasn’t.
Impulsive and wild. She lived entirely in the moment.
She never complained about my work hours.
Never asked for more than I could give.” I swallow.
“I knew she was troubled. I knew she drank too much. But I told myself she’d settle. I thought I could help her.”
I look up and the understanding in Flic’s eyes makes my chest ache.
“You called it earlier,” I say quietly. “The hero complex.”
Another small smile touches her lips.
“It was a whirlwind,” I go on. “We’d been together nearly six months when she suggested a weekend in Scotland.
She’d heard of a place where people would run away to get married at sixteen.
She thought it sounded romantic. But it wasn’t like Vegas.
There was a twenty-nine-day waiting period.
” I shrug helplessly. “I thought it would be romantic to surprise her, so I made the applications in advance for us to marry.
“Ana was insecure sometimes. She’d started to doubt my feelings for her. I thought it would be the perfect way to reassure her. So, the following month when we flew to Scotland, I asked her to marry me and told her we could do it right there and then.”
My hands clench together. It’s an effort to unfurl my fingers. “And then on our wedding night, everything fell apart.”
Flic’s breath catches as I tell her about the message. My father. The payroll. The lies.
She shakes her head in reply. “That’s unreal.”
“He found her somehow,” I say. “She was already in trouble with debt. He told her how to be the perfect girlfriend and paid her to keep tabs on me. He’d wanted her to convince me to return to New York and rejoin Ashborne Holdings.”
Flic shakes her head slowly. “What happened when you found out?”
“Ana didn’t try to deny it. She broke down, and I finally saw how bad things were.
It wasn’t just alcohol. She was hooked on painkillers, probably still is.
I don’t know how I missed it, but I was working constantly and she hid it well.
” My voice drops. “I told her it was over, but that I’d help her get treatment.
She didn’t want that.” I exhale. “When I woke up the next morning, she was gone. She left a note telling me she was sorry and not to bother looking for her. That was five years ago.”
“What did you do?”
“I was hurt and angry, but I wasn’t going to leave her in the mess my father had dragged her into.
I hired a private detective, and I spoke to her parents in the hope of finding her.
I wanted her to know I’d still help her.
But she was good at disappearing. I didn’t hear anything from her until two years ago. ”
I explain what happened the last time Ana crashed into my life and the plans I’ve put in place. Then we fall silent. I draw in a deep breath, suddenly more tired than I can ever remember feeling.
Flic looks thoughtful for a moment. “But if your father did all that to get you back to New York, why did you come back? Isn’t it doing exactly what he wanted?”
I nod slowly, staring out at the city until the lights blur.
“And I probably wouldn’t have come back at all, if not for Helena.
” I swallow back the hurt that’s threatening to claw out of me.
“A week after Ana disappeared, Helena was rushed to hospital. She had a concussion, a broken jaw, and three cracked ribs.”
Flic stiffens. “Your father?”
“No,” I say immediately. “He’s never raised a hand to us. Even monsters have a line they won’t cross, apparently. Helena stayed with Ashborne Holdings after I left. She was senior VP and his right-hand woman. She was loyal and damn good at her job and at anticipating his needs.
“But Charles didn’t like the way people inside the company were starting to listen and respect her more than him.
So he found another way to use her. There was a rival company he wanted to absorb.
The owner had a son.” My throat feels tight, the words a struggle to speak.
“My father convinced Helena to start a relationship with him. He pushed them together. Practically marched them down the aisle because he knew the marriage would strengthen his relationships and convince his rival to sell. And he was right. The worst part?” I continue quietly.
“He knew exactly what kind of man he was giving her to. Prior arrests. Domestic assault charges that were later dropped. He didn’t care. ”
Flic’s breath leaves her slowly.
“That’s when I came back,” I say. “Not for the company or because Charles wanted me to. But for Helena. She needed someone to pick her up and be her person, and to make sure my father couldn’t do anything else to her.
I met with Charles. I told him I’d return and take a board seat, but Helena was to have one, too.
That was the deal. I return to New York.
He gives us two board seats. He threw in the happy-family dinners, I think just because he knew we’d hate it. ”
Flic reaches across the couch, slipping her hand into mine.
“I’m so sorry,” she says softly.
The kindness in her voice nearly undoes me.
“I should’ve told you,” I admit. “But I’m not a white knight, Flic. Ana got dragged into my father’s world because of me.”
“Not everyone wants to be saved,” she says gently.
“I know,” I whisper. My throat tightens again.
“But I failed Ana. And I was too busy making money and building my own life away from my father to protect Helena. When I came back to New York, I swore I’d never bring another person into my life.
Never risk someone else being hurt because they stood too close to me. ”
“But that was five years ago,” Flic says.
I nod.
Her brows lifts. “So, you haven’t… for five years?”
A rough laugh escapes me as I shake my head.
She studies me and I meet her gaze. It feels nothing like the charged heat of the elevator.
This is deeper, and somehow more dangerous.
I’ve shown Flic the ugliest corners of my life and she hasn’t recoiled or run, even though she should.
Instead, she’s stayed. And that terrifies me more than any boardroom or stadium ever could.
Because however much I want her—however much I ache to touch her, to show her all the ways I could make her happy—I still can’t risk her being collateral damage in my life.
Five years is a long time. But I would go a lifetime if it meant keeping her from being hurt.