13. ALLISON
Chapter thirteen
ALLISON
A t dusk, Jacob and I head home. Maddie is still in the hospital’s PICU with Sherry in the family lounge near the unit. Two days of constant watch over Maddie has drained both of our batteries and Sherry’s offer is heaven sent, giving us both the chance to come back home for a night.
Jacob is still tense, and reluctant to be away from Maddie, even though he has been watching over her for the past forty-eight hours. It took Sherry scolding him, probably one minute away from grabbing him by the ear, to convince him.
When he gets home, he slams the coat closet door. My brows raise, and I look at the heavy line of his shoulders.
“Jake,” I say softly.
He grunts.
“Hey, calm down, Jake. Really. I’m sure she’s okay, and she couldn’t be in better hands.”
“I know that. But there’s a big difference between knowing that you shouldn’t worry about something in your head, and not really being worried, Allison. I can’t help it.”
“I understand that because I feel the same way.” I know that he has his reasons for feeling like this. The thought of Maddie needing and crying for me but not seeing me breaks my heart, but I know she’s in the hospital and that’s the right place for her right now. They will take care of her, and we could be with her by morning tomorrow. “I have an idea! Something that won’t take our minds off Maddie, but will just keep the worry at bay.”
Jake gives me a wry look. He shakes his head. “I’m not up for a drink right now, Allie, and I don’t think that will help.”
“I ask you to pick up wine one time on the grocery haul—”
“I mean, you asked for two bottles,” he grumbles, and I roll my eyes, holding up a hand. His lips twitch ever so slightly.
“I wasn’t suggesting that at all. How dare you?” I’m satisfied when my words bring a small smile to his face, tugging his full bottom lip to the side. “What’s actually on my mind is a game.”
His expression brightens. “What game?”
“Let’s start with something basic,” I hedge, remembering how competitive this man is. “Like rock paper scissors.”
“You know there’s a version of that we used to play. The loser gets slapped on their clasped hands.”
“That’s horrible, and barbaric. Why would you do that?”
Jacob is smiling, and he is probably in the middle of a flashback to an episode of his harsh twist to this simple game. “It was fun, I guess. It was also a chance to increase your reflexes. Trust me, nothing will give you greater motivation to be quicker and nimbler than the sandpaper palms of my SEALs.”
“Caveman.” I tease. “I’m not doing any of that with you. Just the normal game, okay?”
His expression is lighter, so I feel good about this somewhat juvenile distraction. “Sure thing.”
We play eight rounds of rock paper scissors, and when I win five of them, I get the horrible idea to try out his suggestion. “Whoever wins this round gets to slap the other. Only this one time.” I am determined to win this round, so I might as well get the chance to teach him a lesson before we move onto something different.
“Are you sure, Allie?” He has lost five of the eight rounds we have played so I understand his reluctance.
“I’m sure. Let’s start.” I wiggle a bit in my seat, getting comfortable before we play. “Rock, Paper, Scissors.”
I have been hustled.
Jacob spreads his hands in the sign for paper and his wicked smile grows when he pokes at my clenched fist. “Paper trumps rock, Allie.”
My smug expression has turned into horror. Surely he won’t slap my hands?
When he grins, his eyes bright, a leap of joy surges through me.
I jump off the couch and I’m on my feet in a split second. My heart is pumping not from any real fear, but because I have a strange excitement that has adrenaline flowing through my entire system. “Please, please, please. Let’s play another game?” I clasp my hands in front of me in humility.
Jacob thinks about it for a long second before he gives me an imperious nod, looking like a resplendent imperial ruler as he does so. “I’ll let you get away with it this time, on the condition that you say pretty please another five times.”
My glare is flat. “No.”
“Yes.” He is just as stubborn as I am, if not more. “And add a sir to it every time. Get to it!” He shoots me with a dismissive wave of his fingers.
“You’re ridiculous,” I snap.
He just grins.
I heave a pained sigh before I start my penitence. “Pretty please, sir. One. Pretty please, sir. Two.”
My eyes catch his. His gaze is sharp. There’s humor there, but the longer our gaze is matched, the darker his eyes grow.
I swallow. “Pretty please,” I say softly. “Sir.”
A shudder goes across his face. He’s still smirking, still holding a light expression, but I can see that inside his gaze, he’s feeling this moment as it becomes more charged.
“Pretty please, sir,” I hold up four fingers. Then, with a deep breath, I pop up my thumb. “Pretty please, sir.”
We both let out a breath at the same time. I lick my lips, trying to keep my head on straight.
He grins, smug as a cat, and I try to focus all my energy on the annoyance I feel—rather than any of the other emotions that are coming up.
“Alright, you win. Which game do you want to play?”
“I’m not sure. Maybe Monopoly, but we play with real money?” I ask innocently.
“Nope. No way.” He shakes his head in complete disagreement. “I’m not letting you rob me blind. Think of something else.”
I don’t have anything in particular on my mind. The only alternatives left are Scrabble and poker, but I have a feeling Jacob won’t agree to poker for the same reasons he rejected my Monopoly idea. “How about Scrabble? It’s either that or poker.”
My plan is working, and Jacob seems much more relaxed. He has lost all the tension in his frame from his earlier worries about Maddie. His arms are sprawled across the couch and his bright blue eyes sparkle with a glint of excitement that wasn’t there a moment ago. “I think we can start with Scrabble. And then, when I’ve broken down your mental resolve, I’ll move onto robbing you blind in poker.”
He laughs brightly as he teases me. I grin.
“Right. Excuse me if I don’t have a lot of confidence in your ability to spell. I hear you boys don’t read books over there. It’s all muscles and guns.” I sigh airily, intent on engaging him in banter, and from the growing smile on his face it’s clear he is taking it all in his stride. “A shame really, because you’re one of the pretty ones and I can’t help but imagine how much better it would be if you could read Hemingway or…”
My words are interrupted by the squeal I let out when Jacob lifts me into the air in the middle of my regret-filled speech bemoaning his intellectual shortcomings. His abrupt action has shocked me, but I like the feel of his arms around me. I don’t want it to end so I wrap my legs around his waist, anchoring me to him.
“Don’t stop now, Allie. Tell me, what else should I be able to read to be the perfect pretty man?”
I know we’re toying with fire. But—for the first time in days—in weeks, if I’m being really honest—I’m just… having fun.
Jacob looks at me, his face close by and relaxed. It’s so good to see him like this. For the first time, Jake actually looks his age. He looks young and—
Good.
He looks good.
“Let me down.” I say lightly, but my hands find their way around his neck, encircling it and resting my fingers on the nape of his neck. I can’t fight the desire to play with the thin hairs there so I give into it, tugging at them lightly. “I won’t slander you anymore. I know your ego can’t take it.” I whisper with the intent of pushing him just a little bit more.
“I think you need to say pretty please again if you want me to put you down.” His voice is octaves deeper, and I know I am not the only one feeling the electricity sparking between us, just like the last time.
I know why he stopped kissing me that day in my room, I know how complicated things are between us. But with the heat rising between us right now, I know I don’t want to put an end to whatever this is. “What if I don’t want you to put me down, Jake?”
Jake’s eyes widen. His gaze dips to my mouth before he looks back up again. “I’ll kiss you,” he warns.
I swallow. “What if I want you to kiss me?”
His eyes darken. “I won’t stop.”
Heat flushes through me. “What if I don’t want you to stop?”
I have always known Jacob was attractive, and seeing him on that porch—hair disheveled, eyes bloodshot from exhaustion —had not changed my mind at all. Living with him had heightened everything I had ever felt, and now, every whispered word seemed to promise more. Every innocent touch carried the risk of delving into the sensuous and turning into a soft caress.
I remember that night we had all those years ago.
I remember the way he’d kissed me—the way his hands had felt. The softness of them, the clumsiness—the heat of it, the desperation. It has only grown since then.
And maybe this is a mistake. Maybe it’s just stress, and hormones, and grief, and other things I can’t begin to detangle.
But maybe it’s also… okay. Maybe it’s okay to want him this much.
To know that he wants me, too.
His face is set in resolute silence, staring into my eyes with a soft gaze. My hand moves to the side of his head, gently pressing my fingers into his hair, and that is enough to break through whatever restrictions he has placed on himself. Jake claims my lips with his and I melt into him.
His lips are demanding, covering mine completely while his teeth lightly tug at them, moving in sync. He nibbles on my lips just as often as he tugs them, and when his tongue demands entry into my mouth, I grant it.
His tongue is rough, strong and flexible enough to taste all of me. I can’t get enough of it, of him. I press myself against him, and when his hardness presses against my center and sends electricity running straight to my core, I moan out his name.
“Jake.” I sigh, pushing myself harder into him. “Please don’t stop this time.” My hand grabs a fistful of his hair in warning, but I lose focus when his lips move to the curve of my jaw, and my hands drop off to run all over his torso. His strength is amazing—holding me up for all this time like I weigh nothing.
When he finally sits on the couch with me on his lap, I slow down my movement, content to just feel him pressed against me.
“I shouldn’t be doing this, Allie. We’ve got something stable going. I don’t want to ruin that.” He is split between two realities, and I know why he thinks this might end badly. What he doesn’t know is that there is absolutely no reason—including her uncle being horrible to me—that could keep me away from Maddie.
“Maddie is mine to take care of, always. And nothing can change that. Do you believe me Jake?” I tilt his head to mine, peering into his beautiful eyes in the hope that he can see through mine and straight into my soul. Maddie is my goddaughter, and nothing that could ever happen between us could make me leave her for a single second.
Jacob’s eyes bore into mine, and I hope he understands the truth my eyes are telling him. His hands make their way to the small of my back, rubbing small circles on it. He puts both his hands on either side of my waist and lifts me off him. I sit on the couch and stare up at him. Maybe he doesn’t want to risk it. I can live with that.
I prepare myself for the rejection he is about to hand me; ready to be as civil as possible despite it.
Jacob stands over me and extends a hand to me. I take his hand in mine, standing straight right before he claims my lips again. Heat soars through me. We stumble our way to his bedroom without unlatching our lips. His hands dance all over my skin, touching every inch of me through my clothes, and when we are both in his room, he guides me carefully to his bed, laying me gently on it.
“Let me touch you, Allison. All of you.” Slowly enough to drive me crazy with need, Jake strips me of my clothes one article at a time until I am bare before him. Kissing every inch of my now open body, he mutters his appreciation.
“You’re perfect.” He breathes out in near reverent tones. His hand touches every inch of me, moving from my neck to my bosom where he tortures me with his actions. He tugs and pulls at the peaks of my fullness, and when they turn red with his attention he captures one bud in his lips and transfers his hands to the other.
“Yes…that feels so good, babe.” I confess as he kisses me. His sucking pulls at my core with a tug accompanying each swallow. The feeling is too much to deal with, frustrating me just as much as it excites me. I work my hand into his hair and pull him into my chest, pushing myself closer to my peak at the same time.
Jacob reads my mind and before I can do it myself, his free hand travels to the junction of my legs and rubs my swollen nub in small circles. My breathing hitches when he does that, and I feel his lips curl in a wicked smile against my chest as he increases the frequency of his manipulations. He rubs me faster and faster until it all comes crashing down on me like a pile of bricks.
I almost throw him off me with my thrashing as I reach my peak for the first time in so long. Electricity courses through my bloodstream and the synapses in my brain go haywire when it hits them. Waves of pleasure hit me over and over, and my trembling form doesn’t stop moving until the pleasure finally dies down and stays as a pleasant resonance in my entire frame.
“That was amazing.” I breathlessly confess. “If I knew you could do that all this time, I’d have employed you.”
“Baby you can’t afford me. Nobody can,” he deadpans, throwing me into chuckles that rock my entire body.
Somewhere in the middle of our exploration, Jake has lost his shirt and when he joins me in laughing, I stare mesmerized as his muscles flex and contract with his movements.
This man is beautiful !
He has the body of a Greek god, and the thought of what he would look like while driving himself into me flashes through my mind.
“You’re looking at me like you want more, Allie. Do you?” My cheeks heat up in mortification when he comments on my stare, and his question makes me divert my eyes in embarrassment. I gather up the courage that has got me this far, to look him in the eyes and tell him exactly what is on my mind.
“Yeah, I want you. The question is, how much of you can I get?” I boldly ask him.
His dark chuckle is all the answer I need. In just a couple fluid movements, Jake is free of his remaining clothing and just as naked as I am. Every muscle in his body stands out in stark relief, a benefit of his training, and it is difficult to move my eyes until I catch a glimpse of his length.
Getting between my legs, he moves until I am comfortably trapped beneath him, and when his hands resume their exploration of my body, I arch my back and shift my hips to put him in the best position for what he is going to do next.
Jacob teases me, running his fingers down my body and lightly over my lower region. When he finally touches me again it is to position himself under it and sink his length into me, delicious inch by delicious inch.
Being full of him in this way is amazing and it robs me of any words. My hand trails over his body, touching him as much as he was doing to me a while ago, and he responds like me, while keeping his rhythm the same through it all. Jake captures my lips with his, preventing any words from leaving my mouth, and at the same time securing my hand in his, threading our fingers.
His unwavering and constant motion sets every part of my body aflame, and I arch upwards, pushing myself into him. He takes me closer to the edge with each thrust, and when he adds a hand into the mix, sliding it between our slick forms to lightly touch my nub, I lose my sense of reality and tumble over the edge of the cliff.
My inner muscles contract around him, pulling him over the edge of nothingness, hand-in-hand with me. He groans his relief into my mouth, as I do the same to him, and we both luxuriate in our climax together.
As we relax against each other, I can’t help but curl in closer to him.
“This was…” I get lost for words.
He chuckles softly. “I know.”
“We should talk about this,” I murmur.
He presses his lips to my head. “Probably.”
I drift off to sleep, draped over him, with absolutely no thoughts in my mind except how wonderful I feel right now.