Chapter 9
Sean walked around an empty apartment on Saturday morning, doing his best to ignore the real estate agent’s constant yammering.
He liked what he saw. The floor plan was open with the soft gray walls of the kitchen blending neatly into the living area.
Even though three bedrooms and two baths were more than he needed, apartments were in short supply in Garfield.
And even with the extra space, he had more than enough saved, so the rent was doable.
He especially liked the fireplace. He could almost see a Christmas tree positioned beside it and Jace’s stocking hanging from the mantle. He’d have to hustle to make it happen this year.
Brittany would love this space.
The thought caught him by surprise. Brittany would never see this space and that was almost everything he needed to know.
A wave of grief overwhelmed him. He faced the agent and held up a finger to interrupt her praises. “I’ve seen all I need to see today. Do you have a card? I’d like to think about this for a few days.”
“Sure.” She dug in her huge bag. “I understand that you need some time to think, but I need to tell you, there are other people interested in this location.”
Sean took the card. “I appreciate that. I’ll be in touch.”
He held himself together until he got outside. When the agent was headed toward her own car, he gave in.
The grief stung his heart, his throat, and his eyes. People said it got better with time. Part of him longed for those days. Another part of him clung to the memories. His memories were all he had left of Brittany.
Halfway to the car, his phone rang. Grateful for something else to focus on he snatched it out of his pocket and swiped the screen. “Hello.”
“Hey, bro, how’s it going?”
On the other end of the connection, Benjamin’s voice held a hint of something that put every nerve ending in Sean’s body on alert. He’d heard that tone of voice many times over the years, usually at the beginning of one of Benjamin’s cockeyed schemes.
“Just looking at apartments.”
“So soon?”
Sean opened his car door and got in. “I’m not going to live with Mom and Dad forever. I appreciate all they’ve done, but I have to get on with my life.”
“I guess their rules are a little hard to swallow now that we’re adults.”
“Living there hasn’t come with any rules.” The other end of the line was silent as if Benjamin was waiting him out. It worked. “It’s true that it’s hard to ignore the ones we lived with all our lives.”
Benjamin laughed. “That one about attending church as long as we lived under their roof must really be chafing you about now.”
“It’s not my favorite, but when it comes down to it, it’s all about respect.” Sean started the car. “Was there a reason for your call this morning?”
“You in a hurry?”
“Mom’s babysitting, and I don’t want her to feel taken advantage of.” He started backing out of his spot.
“I can see that,” Benjamin said. “Especially since she’s babysitting tonight. I called to see what time you wanted us to pick you up.”
And there it was. Something was up.
Sean stopped and put the car in park. “What are you talking about?”
“You’ve either got the shortest memory in the history of the world, or someone’s doing an end run around you.” Benjamin’s laugh echoed. “I almost hope it’s the latter.”
“What are you talking about?” He didn’t mean to shout, but nobody could get under Sean’s skin like his twin. Sean was sure Benjamin knew it, and did it on purpose.
“Getting my wish this early in the morning makes me all tingly inside.” Benjamin’s sarcasm was palpable. “You, me, Kinsley, and Monica. We’re having dinner.”
Sean closed his eyes. His brother had done a lot of underhanded things in his life, but this had to be one of the top five. “Please tell me that you didn’t—”
“I wish I could take the credit, but I didn’t do anything.
This is something the girls cooked up on Thursday.
Kinsley mentioned that we were having dinner tonight at Oakleigh’s.
When Monica said that she’d never been, Kinsley invited the two of you to join us.
We have a seven-thirty reservation. I thought you guys could ride with us. She didn’t mention it to you?”
Sean put his head into his hands. It didn’t take a lot of imagination to visualize the conversation between the girls.
He wondered if Monica had engineered the invitation as payback for demanding her presence at Thanksgiving dinner.
Part of him couldn’t imagine her being that sneaky, the other part of him gave her points for getting back at him so quickly.
“Let me call you back.” Sean swiped the call closed and scrolled his contacts for Monica’s number.
***
MONICA STOOD IN FRONT of a mirror and held up a harvest-gold midi dress.
She liked the way the dress brought out the gold tones in her red hair, but she wasn’t sure it was right for the evening.
She switched to the garment in her other hand, a lightweight navy-blue turtleneck sweater.
The blue in the sweater brought out the blue in her eyes, and since the weather had taken a turn toward chilly since Thanksgiving, the warmth would be welcome.
Frustrated, she tossed both hangers across the bed. What did one wear on a date that wasn’t a date with a friend who she wished was so much more? It was a puzzle she couldn’t solve. And even thinking of the so much more felt like she was being unfaithful to her own heart.
The opportunity to work with Matthew Wright’s ministry was once in a lifetime.
Each time she saw Sean, she felt sucked deeper into a black hole of desire to be with him and Jace. There were so many ifs in both scenarios. If she managed to impress Matthew Wright. If Sean could move past his grief. If she had the courage to choose when the time came.
So many questions.
Not a single answer.
Be patient, daughter, I have good things for you.
Monica mulled over the words. What did they mean? Sean and Jace, a career in Arizona, or was there a five-million-dollar Publishers Clearing House sweepstake in her future? She loved her Heavenly Father with her whole heart, but sometimes His words felt a little ambiguous.
The ringing of her phone interrupted her thoughts. When she saw Sean’s name on the screen, she was tempted to ignore it. There was only one reason for him to call this early in the day. Someone had spilled the beans about tonight’s dinner plans.
It rang five times before she snatched it up. She might be confused but she wasn’t a coward. “Hello.”
“Monica.”
“Sean.” She bit her lip while the silence stretched between them. She could almost picture him pacing, looking for words. She finally took pity on him. “Who told you?”
“I just got off the phone with Benjamin.”
“Ahhh...”
“You wanna tell me what’s going on?”
At least she’d thought this part through. “Sauce for the goose.”
“Excuse me?”
Monica didn’t even try to keep the glee out of her voice. “As in what’s good for the goose...”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it. I’m not going.”
“OK. I’ll leave it to you to tell your mom and let her know that her plans for Jace are off the table for tonight.
When she heard Kinsley and me talking about dinner, she volunteered to watch the baby.
Something about Santa being at the mall and an opportunity to get a picture with the jolly old elf. But if you want to break her heart...”
“That’s blackmail.”
Monica almost laughed into the phone as the tables were truly turned. “Is it working?” The sugar in her voice was enough to sweeten five gallons of tea.
Sean’s response was almost a growl. “Fine. But we’re taking my car. I didn’t enjoy double-dating with Benjamin when we were teenagers, and I’m not going to start now. I’ll pick you up at six thirty.”
The phone went dead in Monica’s hand, but she didn’t care. They kept calling their outings dates. Maybe tonight was the night it was actually true.
***
IT’S NOT A DATE. IT’S not a date. It’s not a date.
The words had become Sean’s mantra throughout the course of the day. He put his hands on the edge of the sink and frowned into the mirror over his bathroom vanity as a little voice that sounded a lot like Benjamin’s whispered in his ear.
Then why are you taking such care with getting ready? You trimmed your beard, you brushed your teeth, and you don’t have a single hair out of place.
“Because I’m human. A man who was taught to take pride in his appearance regardless of the circumstances.”
Let me know how that’s working for you.
He turned on the water to clean the sink, hoping that the noise would drown out the insistent voice.
It’s not a date, it’s revenge. And even if he took the revenge part out of it, it still wasn’t a date.
A man could be friends with a woman with no romance involved.
A man could have dinner with a woman simply because he enjoyed her company.
That’s all this was.
He headed down the hall. When he reached the living room, he couldn’t help but pause in the doorway and watch in stunned silence.
His father, a man who’d invested more time in his ministry than his growing sons, stood with Jace while children’s music filled the room.
Together they shook their booties, clapped their hands, and turned in circles.
Even with little more than a week on his feet, Jace was the better dancer, but Sean gave his father points for trying.
When the music ended, both of the dancers collapsed into a heap on the floor. Sean advanced into the room and applauded. “Can we do a replay? I’d love to get that on video. I think your congregation would enjoy seeing a different side of you.”
“I think that’s the dozenth time we’ve danced to that same song. I’m done.” Dad’s voice was breathless from exertion.
But the music started over, and Jace jumped to his feet, pulling at his grandfather’s hand.
Instead of meeting the challenge, Dad bundled his grandson close and rolled him to the ground.