28. Vivian
twenty-eight
Vivian
P epper’s fluffy tail swats my face, waking me.
I split open one eye and groan when I catch the first strands of early morning light beyond my curtains.
It’s way too early for me to be awake, especially since I was up late replaying that incredible kiss.
I thought embarrassment over being caught would seep into the memory and taint it, but nope.
I would kiss Finn Reynolds in front of Santa and everyone during the town’s Christmas tree lighting ceremony if given the opportunity.
A happy hum harmonizes with Pepper’s purring as I turn over, burrowing deeper beneath my floral duvet. I only get two seconds of snuggly warmth before my bedroom door flies open.
“We need to talk.” Brynn plops herself on the edge of my bed, one leg tucked under her. My cat skitters to the floor and out my open door, but Brynn softens my rude awakening by extending an iced coffee in my direction.
It seems it hasn’t taken long for news of last night’s events to reach gossip central. My eyes catch the time as I push myself up against the headboard—5:55 a.m. Honestly, it’s shocking it took almost a half hour for someone to report to Brynn.
“Thanks.” I take the proffered coffee with one hand while rubbing my eyes with the other.
“Well?” Brynn prompts.
“Well, what?”
Annoyance brews in my veins because her tone and body language are giving stern-sister-talkin’-to vibes, not oh-my-gosh-you-kissed-a-hot-guy-I’m-so-excited-for-you energy.
I was so happy for her when she and Noah hit it off years ago.
And yeah, that ended in a dumpster fire, but it’s been her choice not to date any of the other eligible men in Wilks Beach since.
If Brynn chose to, I’d be ecstatic for her. Why the heck can’t she be happy for me?
“Why the heck can’t you be happy for me?”
My twin’s face mirrors the shock resonating down my arms. I just said that out loud? Wait. You know what? Yeah. I’m leaning into this new chapter of not only speaking in general but speaking my mind.
Doubling down, I add, “I refuse to feel shame for sharing a kiss with someone I really like—even if it was in public.”
Brynn reaches to tug at the hem of her t-shirt, but it’s trapped beneath an aqua Seabreeze Beans apron. “It’s just confusing because I thought you liked Atticus.”
The hurt in her words has me dropping my tense shoulders and stretching my fingers to settle over her knee.
“I did, but”—the smile lifting my lips has its own energy—“things changed. Have you eaten?” I know she hasn’t. Brynn typically gets too busy and forgets to eat. “Let me make you an omelet, and I’ll explain everything.”
After quickly using the bathroom, I crack eggs into a glass measuring cup.
I wish I had the time to make Brynn tater tots—our favorite food—but I know she wouldn’t wait for them to be ready.
Her jittery knee is already bouncing against the underside of our round two-person kitchen table.
She hates being away from the coffee shop during the morning rush.
“Do you remember my ocean wish?”
She nods. “You wanted to talk to Atticus.”
“It turned out I needed a little help, so Finn offered to be my dating coach…” I give my sister the rough details of how he took me to Virginia Beach to talk to men, leaving out our practice kiss and how Finn helped me at the Oceanside Artisan Fair, because I still want to surprise Brynn with that later.
I cross the kitchen, setting a simple spinach-and-swiss omelet in front of my sister.
“And then you kissed?”
“Take three bites, and I’ll tell you.”
My twin rolls her eyes but compiles, shoving half the omelet into her mouth like an uncivilized frat boy.
Food bribery was something Aunt Tammy used to do growing up when Brynn’s weight dipped into dangerously low territory.
Brynn learned the quickest way to get to whatever activity was on the other side of the meal was to gobble it up like a competitive eater.
“I kissed him.” Her fork pauses halfway to her mouth, but I encourage her to continue the action. “I wasn’t quite sure how it would go, but I needed to try.”
“And he kissed you back.”
I bite my lip, remembering how enthusiastically Finn returned my kiss. “Yeah.”
Brynn sets down her fork and stares out the window.
“I really like him, Brynn. He’s obviously gorgeous and incredible at his job, but there’s this soft underlayer that’s even more attractive than what he shows anyone else.
I can identify with that—keeping your true personality to yourself.
” When my sister doesn’t respond, I feel as small as I had before I started this process of self-improvement.
“It’d be really nice for you to be happy for me. ”
Brynn’s dark-brown eyes catch the downturn of my lips, and she shoots to standing, nearly toppling the vase of hydrangeas I put on the table on Friday. Her arms come around me so fiercely an involuntary squeak escapes me.
“I am. I will be. I want to be.” Brynn squeezes me even tighter. “I’m sorry. It’s just…a change.”
Understanding dawns like the sunrise beaming over the ocean each morning.
Brynn does everything the same way every day.
It’s as if she’s afraid if she deviates one iota, the world will come crashing down.
Our apartment decor and the furniture arrangement hasn’t changed since Tammy moved out.
The same goes for the styling of the coffee shop.
She only purchases updated equipment when it becomes searingly necessary.
That’s one of the reasons why I waited so long to ask for the space for my store. I knew that separating the family business into two would be hard on her. But when I’d told her how important it was to me, she agreed, and we worked through the renovation together.
I should have considered that making these changes in my life would upset her balance.
“It is,” I say, hugging her back. “I should have warned you so you could process it. I’m sorry.”
Brynn leans back, shaking her head. “Don’t apologize. I’m in the wrong here.”
A part of me wants to joke about immortalizing her words on a plaque and hanging it over the TV, but since we’re actually talking for what feels like the first time in forever, I don’t dare.
“I’ve wanted this for a long time, Brynn.
I wanted to prove that I could do something more than smile and nod.
” My lungs feel tight, but I fill them anyway.
“No one expects much of me on this island. I know they’re trying to be kind, but it makes me feel like I’m still that terrified little girl who just lost her parents.
Like I’m trapped in this tight little box. ”
Brynn’s hands rub my shoulders, almost too roughly, but I know it’s her way of consoling me.
“But once I made that wish…things started being different. It was hard at first, but I feel like I’m growing and stretching in ways I didn’t even plan to.” A bark of laughter escapes me. “Last night, I went to a boxing class.”
My sister’s eyes fly wide.
“I know, right? Me voluntarily attending an exercise class is akin to mermaids walking on land. Every muscle I didn’t even know I had is on fire, and it hurts to breathe, but I might go again.
Geneva appears terrifying but is secretly sweet, and there’s something undeniably cathartic about punching out your frustration. ”
Brynn’s lip twitches at the corner. “Maybe I should join you.”
“You should!” I grip both her hands in between mine. “It’d be so much more fun with you there. Though I should warn you that Geneva’s class should be classified as torture not exercise.”
My sister chuckles before falling into silence, thinking. “So what’s next for you?”
“I don’t know.” There’s a breathy giddiness to my words. “I want to keep trying new things. Maybe I’ll croak out a Raven Sacaria song at karaoke on Thursday. That’ll keep the town guessing.”
A part of me wants to tell my sister about part three of my plan, but Brynn needs some time to digest this news before I launch something that big on her.
My sister’s smile fades as she chews the inside of her cheek. “I’m sorry I didn’t see that you needed this. I know that I can be”—when my confident sister struggles for words, my heart cracks—“too rigid, but I don’t want you to be unhappy because of me. I love you. I want what’s best for you.”
“I love you too. You don’t make me unhappy.”
Brynn doesn’t answer, her hands dropping from mine.
“You don’t.” My words come out firmly as I stoop to catch her gaze. “You know that, right? You’re the most important person to me.”
It takes a few halting seconds for my sister’s eyes to meet mine. “You might not feel that way when you fall in love with Finn.”
I snort, even though a small part of my heart whispers I might already be there. “You didn’t feel that way when you were in love with Noah. You two were all moonpie, heart-eyes for each other for years, but you still loved and made time for me.”
“Point taken.” Brynn’s hands fist at her sides.
Oops. While distracted by baring my soul, I’d forgotten our pact to never speak of Noah.
“Want to go to karaoke with me?” I ask, quickly changing the subject.
I nearly faint with shock when Brynn tilts her head, considering. “I’ll think about it.”
“Really?”
Fizzy bubbles shoot through my veins. Maybe my changes will encourage Brynn to make a few of her own—when she’s ready, on her own timeline. Whenever that is, I’d be more than happy to hold her hand along the way.
“We’ll see. I should get going,” Brynn says, already sliding back into work mode. She’s halfway to the staircase before she pauses and pivots.
“Oh, and what’s this about a dance at the library? Joe said it was a sock hop?”
A grin lifts my lips. As much as Wilks Beach residents love to gossip, they occasionally get their information twisted.
“It’s a Regency ball,” I correct her. “Finn is organizing it as a fundraiser to update the media room.”
My sister straightens. “A Regency ball? He’s doing that for you?”
“No.” I feel my blush staining my cheeks. “Not for me, for the town.”
“But you love everything Regency.”
“So do millions of Worthington viewers.”
“But those people didn’t model their business after a modiste’s shop.”
I turn to the sink, turning on the water to scrub the dishes. “This fundraiser idea is better than Carol Cook’s suggestion for a topless fire station car wash.”
My sister scoffs. “That’s just an excuse for Carol to gawk at shirtless men without having to walk down the beach.”
“Too true. Her ocean wish would be twenty uninterrupted minutes with Henry Cavill’s abs.” When my sister’s surprised laughter fills our small apartment, my smile grows. “Though, I’ll never understand why she lives in a beach town when she hates sand.”
“She’s a local. Like us. We’re born here. We belong here.”
“And every once in a while, we let new people into our ranks.” I glance at my sister, thinking about the various mainlanders who’ve made Wilks Beach their home over the years. Maybe, with time, I can convince Finn to consider the town his too.
Just like we can have an entire conversation with eyebrow lifts and head tilts, Brynn understands what I’m asking for here.
“We do.” Her mouth is firm, but my sister nods. “We do.”