16. Odette
16
ODETTE
I wake slowly, drifting in and out of consciousness. My first thought is how warm I am, cocooned in heat that feels alive. Too alive. It feels like I’m caught between a dream and reality, unable to distinguish what’s real and what isn’t.
My second thought? This isn’t my bed .
My eyelids flutter, then open, only to be greeted by a soft flickering light. A fire, crackling low in the hearth. I’m on a mattress on the floor, a thick blanket draped over me. My leg’s asleep because there’s something heavy on it, and a slight breeze wafts over my head in a rhythmic pattern.
But that’s not what makes my heart stutter.
This... this can’t be real.
Oh, but it is, my traitorous body sings, clearly pleased with this latest development.
Duncan’s arm is wrapped over my torso, our legs entangled. I can feel the steady rise and fall of his chest against my back, his breathing slow and even. Then I’m reminded of how little clothing there actually is between us, and that men really do wake up aroused against their own volition.
My breathing stutters as I stare at the fire, too afraid to move, too afraid to break whatever spell I’m under. I can’t think of a scenario where I willingly crawled into his bed. I don’t sleepwalk. I took my sleep aids last night, so I know I was knocked out cold. The only plausible explanation for this is that he carried me here himself.
Still, I find that I don’t hate it.
Other parts of me, the parts that crave his touch, the parts I’ve been actively suppressing and ignoring for the last few days, decide it’s time to play. And he’s right there. My stomach flips, my breathing comes out faster, and I have the mistakable urge to turn my head, just slightly enough to capture his lips with mine, morning breath and all.
You can’t blame it on mistletoe toe this time , my traitorous body chimes in.
A third thought occurs to me. Where is here , the living room? What happened last night?
This feels like a dream, the kind I envisioned ten years ago, of waking up in his arms. If this truly is a dream, then my subconscious must be vicious bitch for playing such elaborate tricks on me.
Except, this dream… it’s too vivid. The heat of his body. The roughness of his shirt against my skin. The weight of his arm draped over my waist. I shift slightly, testing the boundaries of this dream, and he stirs. His arm tightens around me instinctively, pulling me closer.
“Power’s out,” he murmurs, his voice low and gravelly with sleep. “Had to warm you up, you were freezing.”
“Okay.” Whose breathy voice is that?
“Go back to sleep.” His hand moves slightly lower, but I don’t think he’s doing it on purpose.
Rational thought flees from my brain, leaving behind a haze of sensation. “I can’t.”
“Try,” he says, his voice rumbling against my back.
“It doesn’t work that way.” The words slip from my lips before I can rein them in. And since I’m on a roll, I add, “I’m very turned on.”
His breath hitches, the warmth of it mingling with the flickering flames that surround us.
“Odette…” he trails off, his voice is strained. Pained, even.
“I’m always turned on in the mornings.” My fingers wrap around his wrist, and I let myself sink back against him, my body relaxing into his hold. “I could say it’s a side effect of my meds, but that’s only the half of it. Adding you to the mix is a potent combination. Feel free to check.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because,” he utters in a thick rasp. “I can’t stop at just one taste. I want all of you.”
His cock jerks against the small of my back, just in case I missed his meaning.
I let out a shaky breath. “I want this,” I tell him. “I want you.”
What I mean to say is, my body is yours, always has been.
His hand moves further down, undeterred by the admittedly weak grasp I have on his wrist. I tilt my head back in ecstasy as he slides one finger in, then a second, and he moans as if I’m the one pleasuring him. He nuzzles against my neck, his lips finding the pulse point behind my ear as he uses his fingers, mouth, and words to work my body to an explosive orgasm.
I’m still coming down from that high when he gently pushes me back onto the bed. What little clothing I had on is gone in an instant, peeled off me and discarded beside us on the floor.
His face is all shadows and hard angles in the flickering flames of the fireplace behind us. But I see the flare of hunger in his eyes as they roam over me in slow, appraising study. Then, with a gentleness that contrasts the barely contained tension swirling in him, he cups my breasts, kneading both in his hands, his thumbs flicking over my erect nipples. I can’t bite back my moans as he continues to lick, flick, nip, and suck my overly aroused nipples, caressing me into a state of quivering, shameless desire. I want more. Need more.
“Duncan, please,” I say, panting, as I snake my hands around his hips and push down his boxers. His erection springs free, and I lick my lips. I want him with a fierceness that shocks me. It’s primal, this feeling, and downright cavewoman in nature, but I don’t care. The look on Duncan’s face as he trails kisses down my collarbone, dragging his mouth lower and lower, with his gaze locked onto me reflects it, which drives me even further towards the edge.
“That’s not what I meant,” I protest, but it’s weak.
One corner of his lips curves upward, like he knows it’s impossible for me to disapprove of anything he’s doing. He sucks my clit into his mouth, and I can’t suppress the gasp that escapes my lips. Two fingers slide into my wetness and my back arches. I dig my fingers desperately clutching at the sheets as I spread my knees further, giving him even greater access to me. He gives my overly aroused sex the same treatment he gave my nipples, until I feel I’m close to the edge once again. But, as much as I love what he’s doing, I don’t want my next orgasm to be on his face. I want him inside me.
With a boldness I didn’t know I possessed, I lace my fingers through his hair and drag him up my body. Our movements are uncoordinated as we discard what’s left of his clothing. Then he takes my mouth with his, gently exploring with his tongue as he settles in between my legs. The head of his cock slides over my slick folds, tortuously slow, before fitting into my opening. Then, in a slow stroke he shifts his hips forward, just enough to push the tip inside. He’s met with resistance, but the last thing I want is for him to stop, so I drag my nails down his back, my fingers digging into his ass. He groans into my mouth and deepens the kiss, distracting me with his lips as he takes his time, working himself in, then slicing out to coat himself in my slickness. It’s like he’s intentionally driving me so close to the edge but won’t let me fall, teasing me with just the tip, until I arch against him and moan his name over and over, a mix between a plea and a command.
“Duncan, please. I need you. Now.”
He pulls his face back from mine, holding himself up with his arms to look into my eyes, and then with one more slow stroke he’s inside of me. We both sigh once he’s fully seated. He hovers above me, studying my face. I assume to check if I’m in pain.
A beat passes, and he moves slightly against me. I shift my hips forward in response, taking him even deeper.
“Fuck, you’re tight,” he breathes out, the sound so low it vibrates into me. “And so wet.”
“It’s been a while,” I say, lifting my hips to match his rhythm.
“What’s a while?”
“Too long.” I wriggle underneath him and run my hands down his body, encouraging him to move faster.
Instead he stills, cursing under his breath.
“What’s wrong?”
“I didn’t… I don’t…” he trails off and drops his forehead to mine, his eyes closed. “I don’t have any condoms, and now’s probably a bad time to ask if you’re on birth control.”
That ship already sailed. Like, ten years ago.
“I am. I’m anemic, so birth control helps stabilize my hormone levels, which, in turn, maintains my iron levels. I get tested regularly to monitor those, so I know I’m clean. And I haven’t been with anyone in a year.”
I skip the part where I got pregnant the first time I had sex, ‘cause what are the odds of that?
He nods, his gaze drops to my mouth. “I haven’t been with anyone in five years, and same.”
Five years?
“Why?” I blurt out, before it occurs to me that asking about the other women he hasn’t been with while he’s balls deep inside of me is not the best time. Then his answer stuns me.
“They’re not you.”
Huh?
His lips crash down on mine as his fingers feed hungrily through mine, lacing them together. Our hands, entwined and trembling, send electric currents through me, intense enough to ricochet through him. I didn’t think it was possible cum from a kiss alone, but I do a second later. My entire body seizes up around him, thighs gripping his sides, inner muscles clenching so hard he could barely move. I tighten my hold on his fingers and try to keep some semblance of balance through wave after wave of white lightening that seeds through my nerve endings.
“This, right here,” he presses our foreheads together as tremors wrack my body, “is the answer to your question. Why no other woman compares to you.”
I’m still cumming when he moves, pistoning his hips in a way that hits that sweet spot inside me over and over. It’s not long before my entire body hums and sings under his expert touch, my muscles clenching around him deliriously.
“I love the way you sound when you come.” His chin drops to my shoulder, and he drags my earlobe into his mouth. “It’s one of my favorite things in the world,” he rumbles, then nips it, “right up there with how you taste.”
Oh, God.
“What are you doing to me?”
He exhales in a rush, warm breath feathering my cheek. “If you have to ask,” he thrusts into me again, and I clench my jaw shut to keep from screaming, “then I’m not doing this right.”
Not doing this right?
The buzzing in my veins, the quivering muscles of my thighs, and the beads of sweat forming along the back of my neck would suggest otherwise.
He pulls halfway out and slams into me. My spine arches off the bed, a cross between a moan and a needy whimper slips through my clenched teeth.
His hips come to a halt, and his eyes search mine. “Don’t hold back now, sweetheart. I want your screams.” He picks up the pace, teeth scraping over the skin of my neck as his breathing takes on a rough edge. “I want your moans. I want your total surrender. I want it all.”
“You have me.”
He pulls his head from my shoulder and stares down at me with hazy eyes. “ All of you?”
My breathing stutters.
Is he asking what I think he’s asking?
My eyes grow warm, so I turn away. He unlinks our hands, braces all of his weight on one arm, then tips my face back to his.
“Don’t hide from me,” he growls as he saws his hips between my legs, our gazes locked as he lets me see everything, including the parts that should scare me but don’t. “I want,” thrust, “all of you,” thrust, “all the time.”
Sweat peppers his hairline, and a sheen of perspiration covers his neck and chest. With his free hand, he brings my hand to his mouth, kissing my wrist and then opening my palm up and kissing it too before he trails his tongue over my fingers. He slams into me hard, then again, and an intense orgasm rips through my body, hard enough that my eyes roll back.
“Duncan,” I cry out, but it’s too late, my body is already shuddering around him for the umpteenth time. My toes curl as I pulse and throb, coming harder than I did before. He doesn’t slow down, though. He fucks me through it until I’m spent, twitching and sweating, a pile of molten orgasmic bliss.
“Where do you want me to come?” he rasps, pressing a chaste kiss to my lips.
The words tumble out in a rush. “Inside me. I want to feel you.”
I swear, his cock stiffens and swells inside me. His head drops to my shoulder, his grunts replaced by a hard thrust and a decadent growl as his body jerks his release into me. His breathing slows, warm breath coats my skin, adding to the lust-filled bliss that is Duncan.
We lie there, sweaty and boneless for a few minutes before he rolls off and gathers my body against his. My eyelids flutter, then close, and for the first time in… well, a while, I feel safe. Content. Happy. And it’s because of him.
A fourth thought occurs to me. Even though my body craves him, my heart won’t survive him a second time.