10. CHAPTER 10
Zayne
Ciondo
Shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
Fuck him, the entire world, and every last fucking person in it.
Zayne ground his teeth when he returned to the observation room with his brother. He'd prepared for this contingency, but he hoped to avoid it. And she picked the hint he most wanted to avoid.
“What the hell was that?” Luke's accusing stare bore into him.
“I gained her trust. That's what.”
“She was hiding something.”
Zayne waved a dismissive hand at his brother. “Only what I told her to hide.”
“Do you think I'm an idiot?” Luke snarled.
“I do actually, but that's irrelevant to this.”
Luke continued staring at him, but Zayne watched Kira, hoping she recovered because he wouldn't get away with that again.
“What I told the prisoner is true,” his brother said. “I'm watching, even when you think I'm not.”
“I hope you enjoy every second of your voyeurism,” Zayne muttered. He didn't have time to deal with this right now. Kira fought for her life in there. Any question may destroy her.
With a curse, Luke stalked across the room, ripping out his phone, surely to cry home to Father about how terrible Zayne was for this job.
And he was right. Zayne might not have figured out how to save Kira yet, but he and his most trusted friends worked tirelessly on plans to break her out of prison. Luke did not know just how deep Zayne's sabotage ran.
Though Dr. Cooper pressed her once more about her secrets, Kira steered the interrogation better than before. Perhaps his interruption gave her ideas about how to handle him. She was smart. If any civilian could survive this, it was her.
“Let's dig deep. Can you think of any other secrets?” the doctor asked.
“I don't know. Plenty, I'm sure. I read books I'm not supposed to read,” Kira said.
Good. Not such a harmful admission. Not as harmful as admitting that she learned how to manipulate PXI and stained the Phaedra's sky with rebellion.
“Her mother isn't just a rebel but a revolutionary,” his brother said. “The daughter of a revolutionary won't be easy to sway. She probably grew up being conditioned to hate the Phaedra.”
Kira was a revolutionary in her own right, not just the daughter of one.
With mere words, she exposed the Phaedra's lies about divinity and undermined his authority.
The people saw it as the PXI rebelling against the Phaedra.
The entire empire witnessed him losing control, and Kira didn't need to hurt a single person to do it.
“What do you think about the books?” The psychiatrist leaned forward, lips quirking in a show of how eager this made him.
“Thoughts I'm not supposed to have. Like we aren't as powerless as you all want us to believe.”
Her words sounded fearless, but Zayne knew she was not fearless.
He considered her quite risk-averse. Terror flickered in her gaze now and set a tremble in her fingers.
Despite that, she spoke with such steadiness and confidence, strength emanating from smoldering rage and unyielding conviction.
In Kira's every word, he sensed the kind of anger that took a lifetime to grow, and more than enough control to wield it like a scalpel.
That disciplined indignation might be enough to transform someone so kind into someone so fierce, except one thing dwarfed all else in her blazing eyes.
Compassion.
Kira felt all the hurt of the empire without recoiling or breaking down into a numb, bitter thing. She felt it, and with it she conquered that considerable amount of fear. Just like she climbed buildings with him when heights terrified her.
The empire called Zayne a war hero. They called him fearless. Courageous.
Zayne fought without fear and feeling because he was broken.
Not Kira. She felt it all. Carried it all. And never looked away.
His fists tightened until they ached. If anyone hurt her…
Luke's gaze cut to Zayne again. His brother must have noticed the tension in his body. Just being here set him on edge. With Kira fully under Dr. Cooper's control, Zayne struggled to mask when normally he did it so expertly.
By the time they stopped for the night, Kira looked ready to fall asleep standing up. Dr. Cooper left her with the nurses and met them in the observation room.
“Don't try running off, Zayne,” Dr. Cooper said. “Let's take a stroll.”
He groaned openly and walked with the doctor into the hall.
Zayne had come here many times through the years, forced to endure follow-up treatment as a boy and trauma work after his time in the North.
It never got easier returning. The corners of every room crawled with shadows of days he didn't fully remember.
“I've known you for a long time.” Dr. Cooper spoke in that annoyingly slow voice. “Still, you shocked me today. It isn't like you to interfere. I can't fathom that you told her about the reprogramming.”
They walked a dangerous path together. Dr. Cooper was questioning him now. “She's stubborn. I take my duty seriously. She needed to know, so she didn't develop any delusions about resistance.”
Dr. Cooper scrutinized him. “You truly care about her.”
“You think it's a problem.”
“No. I think it gives you a genuine bond. She reacts every time I say your name. While she said you're an asshole, I sense something more.” Dr. Cooper clasped his hands behind his back as they walked. “My concern is with your recent loss.”
This man had spent too much time playing around in his head. Pain gripped his chest more deeply than he expected. “I'm accustomed to loss. I'll manage just fine.”
“No one becomes accustomed to loss. Desensitized, yes. That's not the same thing. Are you sleeping at night? That's always been a warning sign for you in the past.”
“I'm sleeping well enough.”
“Any nightmares?”
Zayne stopped and faced him. His feelings for the man were no secret, and he never felt obligated to hide them. “Am I being ordered to discuss this with you?”
“Must you require orders to seek treatment? You made such a big step today. Let's not backslide.”
“Your treatment isn't necessary.”
“You're slipping.” Dr. Cooper scrutinized him like he had the computer screen with Kira's vitals and brain waves. “This mission will put stress on you that I worry you can't handle in your current state.”
“The Phaedra is confident in me.”
“He is. But what if I tell him I'm concerned?”
Zayne stepped closer to the doctor. “We've been at peace for a long time. Is this a battle you really want to fight?”
“Oh.” Dr. Cooper chuckled. “You're going to threaten me?”
“You're threatening me.”
“I'm your physician. It's my job to share my medical findings with the Phaedra. You're entrusted with important responsibilities.”
Smug bastard. “You said yourself that I'm doing well with the prisoner. So, leave me alone.”
Zayne chose not to visit Kira before heading to his room for bed. He'd done enough damage. Better for her to endure this night alone.
After forcing down dinner, he distracted himself with his evening exercise routine.
Though he wasn't able to do his usual workouts yet, he managed some upper body exercises that didn't strain his leg.
Brock may not agree, but his friend wasn't here to stop him, and he needed this.
Needed to stop thinking while surrounded by nightmares in Dr. Cooper's clinic.
The physical exertion calmed his mind enough to focus on paperwork. A man from the cleaning crew dropped off tea for him, and Zayne drank it while he finished working on his laptop, until finally he tried to sleep.
He needed a break from this place.
But his thoughts betrayed him as he hung on the precipice between awake and asleep.
Pops of memory swirled through his mind, vanishing as quickly as they came, so he didn't even know what haunted him.
Zayne rolled over in bed, craving a late-night run, no matter how much it hurt his leg.
If only Dr. Cooper didn't watch his clinic so closely.
His thoughts spun so fast that soon the entire room was spinning.
Terrible realization poured over him. This wasn't normal. His heart hammered like he'd gone for the run, and dizziness swept over him even though he lay down.
Zayne pushed himself up from the bed, unsteady.
“What did you give me?” He searched for the cameras in the room, chest pumping. “Get out here. Now.”
Silence.
“Coward.” Zayne threw his blanket off hard enough for it to slam against the wall.
Shadows shifted.
Pain crawled over the base of his skull.
In the past, Dr. Cooper forced all manner of medications upon him, some that felt like they pushed him into a different plane of existence. This wasn't as extreme, but he definitely put something in that tea.
Why didn't Zayne catch it? Stupid.
“I'm going to kill you,” he said, too angry to regret it. Dr. Cooper knew better than to show his face tonight.
Zayne pulled on his sweatpants and his tank top and staggered into the hall, reaching for the wall.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Edward's face smiling at him. It looked so real that he stumbled back. Only then did he realize it wasn't in his mind. A picture of her hung on the wall. Others after that. Pictures of everyone he'd lost in Bluehaven.
The sound of his heart boomed off the walls and echoed back at him.
A furious growl ripped from his clenched teeth. “What. The. Fuck.”
He tore the picture of Edwards down and stuffed it in his pocket, not willing to abandon her here in this hellhole.
“Hey,” he shouted this time. “This is too far. Get the hell out here and face me!” Nausea swelled in his stomach as he ripped all the pictures down, refusing to look at them.
Their faces haunted him, though, rippling in the shadows.
Zayne stopped in the kitchenette, gripped his hands into fists, and looked up at the closest camera. He felt sick from the drugs, the memories, the danger Kira faced.
Edwards’ blood doused his body.
No, only sweat. Just sweat.
Fuck. Edwards never deserved any of this. Neither did Kira.
Fuck!
He needed something to drink. Why was he so thirsty? Zayne staggered to the kitchen cabinets and grabbed a glass when he noticed a note.