10. Andrie
Andrie
Iwoke with a start, bolting upright and huffing as if I’d been running a marathon.
Or had been unable to breathe. Pushing back the memory, I ran a hand through my messy hair, using the same breathing techniques I taught my patients to bring down my heart rate.
Ignoring my shaking hands, I swung my legs out of bed, needing more air than my bedroom allowed.
Not bothering to even throw on shoes, I flung the back door open and practically bolted to my comfy outdoor lounge chair.
It wasn’t the first time my nightmares had sent me running into the night, and I knew it wouldn’t be the last. But as much as I told my patients to expect long-term ramifications of what they’d been through and that nightmares were a normal by-product of their experiences, it aggravated me to no end that I still had to go through them from time to time.
Frustration warred with lingering fear, making it harder for me to come down. I was still counting down when strong arms scooped me up. I screamed, having been so focused on looking at my feet that I hadn’t realized anyone else was there.
“Dumbass,” I heard Vik’s voice next to me. “You scared her even worse.”
I stopped flailing, knowing I was safe with Vik there.
“I could hardly leave her here by herself. She’s clearly upset.” Xander’s raspy baritone vibrated in my ear from where my head rested against his chest. I could feel his heartbeat pounding almost as fast as mine.
“I-I’m fine,” I managed to get out, putting a hand on his arm, trying to get him to put me down. “I just needed some air.”
“You’re trembling, sweetheart.” The almost crooning tone, paired with his warm hand slowly rubbing up and down my arm and back, had me biting my lip to prevent from tearing up.
I felt him look at Vik, and I stiffened, not wanting to be alone with Xander right now, knowing I was weak and would likely give in to companionship if he pushed.
But instead of leaving, Vik dragged the lounger against the house, turning it into a bench. I smiled as the men sat, our combined weight causing it to groan, and I wondered briefly if we were going to end up going through it and onto the porch, but it held.
Xander still held me, but he’d shifted me enough so I was almost between the two men, his arm still wrapped around me supportively. I marveled at his strength. He handled my weight as if I were a small child, despite the fact that I wasn’t a petite woman.
Vik, knowing my preferences in working through a nightmare just as well as I knew his, stayed silent as I pulled myself together.
Xander followed suit, though both men’s touch let me know they were there for me.
Vik’s hand was on my knee, rubbing gently, while Xander’s was on my midriff, the slow circles becoming more of a distraction as time went on.
“How did you know I was out here?” I asked, trying to ignore my nerve endings coming online as my breathing finally returned to normal.
Vik raised an eyebrow. “We’d just parked and were about to go inside my house when you came running out the back—we heard the door slam. When we called out and you didn’t answer, we wanted to make sure you were all right.”
“You’re home early,” I commented, uncomfortable in the silence and noting it was close to three.
He shrugged. “It was a quiet night. Plus, Xander helped with the cleanup.”
Xander gave me a boyish grin that made him look ten years younger. “Vik let me throw someone out the window. The others were jealous.”
I barked out a laugh despite myself, shaking my head at their antics. “Yeah, Lessia complains often that he ruins her fun. He put in a no-throwing-out-the-window rule.”
Vik grumbled about cost of glass, crazy-ass games, and clean-up.
“You’re getting uptight in your old age,” Xander teased, chuckling. “I remember a time when you’d have come up with something along those lines.”
“Yeah, when I was twelve,” Vik retorted dryly. “It’s not like we would’ve done it. Hell, the trouble we’d have been in for doing something like that …”
“Then I guess we should be making up for lost time,” Xander covered when Vik trailed off with a frown.
Vik only grunted, and I smiled at the two men’s banter, realizing I was no longer shaking.
“Want to talk about it?” Xander asked as if reading my mind.
“No, thank you,” I said primly. I felt Vik shift next to me. When it was just the two of us, in the dark of night, we sometimes purged our demons. But with Xander, I didn’t feel as comfortable sharing my experiences.
Neither man commented, just sat with me in companionable silence for a long time, listening to the occasional sounds of a car passing by, crickets chirping and, in the distance, a coyote howling.
I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but I found myself relaxing against Xander, snuggling into his warmth.
“Sorry I worried y’all,” I said, finally feeling back to normal.
“No worries,” Vik said behind me, patting my knee. “It’ll never beat that time I almost shot you.”
I smiled, though I felt Xander’s muscles bunch beneath me. “Yeah, well, I probably shouldn’t have come bursting into your bedroom. Though, at least, it wasn’t the middle of the night.”
“It was barely nine in the morning. For those of us who work nights, that’s practically pre-dawn.” Vik’s smile could be heard in his words.
“There was a rattlesnake in the garage. You can’t fault me for panicking,” I protested before turning to Xander to explain.
“I was just minding my business, getting ready to go to work, when the little guy came out of nowhere.” I turned back to Vik as I continued to reminisce.
“As it was, I had to change after you removed it because I’d dropped my coffee cup, and it’d splashed everywhere, making me late to work that day and coffee-less until the afternoon.
And you cursed a blue streak when our neighbor—the eighty-year-old who kept trying to get into your pants—saw you up bare-chested and came over to visit.
By the time you managed to get rid of her, you’d decided it was time to stop renting and find our own places. ”
Xander’s amusement laced his words. “Please tell me more about this old neighbor of yours.”
Vik swore, and I giggled as I explained, “She used to pinch his butt anytime she could get her hands near it.”
“That was bad enough, but I had to draw the line when she started reaching for other parts of my anatomy.”
Xander’s body shook, moving me with him, as Vik told him about some of her more blatant exploits.
I still remembered coming home that day, finding Vik a little wide-eyed, going through real estate listings for us both.
We’d been sharing a house back then and already talking through the idea of living close to, but not on top of, each other.
That day—between the snake and the neighbor—sealed the move for us both.
I never realized my eyes had drifted closed as I listened to Vik and Xander talking, their voices lulling me to sleep, my nightmare long forgotten, and I soaked up the feeling of safety and warmth from the two men.