24. Xander
Xander
There were few sentences that were as ominous as a woman saying “We need to talk,” but damned if I’d let Andrie see me flinch. I opened my mouth to suggest we go inside first, but Vik cut me off, barking out, “Andrie. I said drop it.”
His harsh tone set my back up, especially when I saw Andrie’s shoulders fall even as her chin jutted out rebelliously. He must have seen it, too, because he added more gently, “Please. For me.”
With a heavy sigh, she turned to walk back up her steps, stopping long enough to exchange stares with Vik before walking inside without a word and closing the door firmly behind her.
“What the hell was that?” I asked, more than a little bewildered.
Vik shook his head, practically stomping over to his own place. I cast a look at Andrie’s just as she cut off the lights, clearly shutting us both out. I wondered what had the two of them at odds, but I didn’t have to think hard.
Vik had already pulled out a bottle of vodka by the time I caught up with him in the kitchen. He’d poured two fingers into a glass but was studying it as if the glass held all the answers to the universe.
“You going to drink that or stare at it?” I asked in Russian.
Glass shattered as he threw it against the wall.
“I guess that’s a third option,” I said, keeping my voice mild.
I grabbed the bottle to take a drink before he tossed that, too.
It had been a long-ass day, and it didn’t look like it was going to end anytime soon.
“She’s made the connection,” Vik muttered.
“She knows …” I trailed off, but Vik shook his head before I could finish that thought.
“She realizes now you must’ve known Demi. She knew, on some level, that you must have been involved in the same organization, being from my family and all. But it dawned on her that if I left to track her down, my brother must have taken my place.”
“And your place was always with him,” I murmured, dread making the alcohol sit like lead in my gut.
“She’s going to want you to talk about him.
” Vik ran a hand through his hair. “She hasn’t asked about him in so long.
She stopped looking for pictures and even refrained from asking Lessia direct questions when she met with her after your paths crossed.
She told me it was too painful to see how much life was wearing on him, see how much time had passed.
Still, she was always so damn optimistic that he’d get out alive. ”
Swallowing hard, I shook my head. “She had to have known that was never going to happen. She’s smarter than that.” But then, Alex had always been an optimist … and a romantic.
Vik just grunted, turning to rifle through one of the drawers to pull out a towel.
My feet might as well have been encased in concrete as I watch him clean up the mess, thinking about his words.
“I can’t lie to her,” I finally said quietly. “I know I’m supposed to—that I agreed, but—“
The growl that came from Vik was animalistic and yet insulted at the same time. “Of course, you can’t fucking lie to her.”
“I agreed,” I repeated, but there was no force in it. I meant what I’d said about lying to Andrie.
“What are they going to do? Throw your ass back to Russia?” He snorted, tossing the broken glass, towel and all, into the trash.
“Still, it would be better if she doesn’t ask.
Do you think she’s just going to accept your words with a smile, and you both live happily ever after?
We’ll be lucky if she doesn’t turn her wrath on the entire organization when she finds out.
The best case is we let things die down first—make sure Hardy’s in a cage and the bitch dead and buried.
At least, that way, she can process her mad without the rest of us crammed down her throat. ”
I raised an eyebrow. “Process her mad? You two really do spend too much time together. Soon, you’re going to have to hang up your own shingle. After all, what’s a bartender but a poor man’s shrink?”
He raised his middle finger, but I saw his face relax slightly at seeing my amusement.
“Seriously, though, how long do you think it’ll take Lessia to wrap this whole thing up? And Hardy?” I added, not about to discount the man who’d created the whole mess and had a reason to want to harm Andrie if he found out what happened to his fake Steve.
Vik shrugged. “Hardy? With the connections in DC that Thoth has, it’s likely they’re knocking down his door as we speak.
Irina will be a while longer, but it’ll likely be weeks rather than months.
Lessia and company will want to use this incident as the reason Irina was eliminated.
If they wait too long, the connection won’t be as clear.
But Lessia is methodical in her kills, even if they are bloody. ”
I tried to reconcile a calculated killer with the temper-prone woman I thought I knew, but I had a hard time until I remembered the dead look in her eyes when she’d told Vik and I she would take the assignment.
“Well, here’s to her getting in and out without fanfare before having Irina begging for it to end long before she goes,” I toasted with the bottle, taking a long pull.
“It doesn’t matter how long she suffers. It’ll never be long enough.” Vik grabbed the bottle from my grasp and downed a good bit, his eyes haunted.
“Who’s on Andrie tonight?” I asked, a weird combination of bone-tired and wired. I knew no one was going to leave her unguarded until we knew she was safe.
“Shade and Charge. I’ve got to get to the bar, but our shifts start at three, so you should get some sleep.”
“And you?”
“I’ll sleep this afternoon while you’re playing boyfriend. I only need a few hours.”
I followed him out when he left, trying to see if I could spot the two men guarding Andrie, but I couldn’t see them.
Still, I could feel their eyes, and I knew she was in good hands, so I took my time showering, needing to wash away the filth.
But no matter how hot the water was, I felt dirtier and dirtier as the memories I tried to repress hit me in waves.
The crack in the wall I’d allowed to give Lessia the information grew wider, as if water was coming through a tiny hole in a dam.
Shutting my eyes, I tried to brace against the onslaught, but I knew it was too little, too late …
Screams, almost inhuman, echoed down the hallway as I followed my mother down the brightly light corridor.
All the books I’d read said that dungeons and bad people liked the dark, but I’d never believed it.
My mother preferred white and light to dark.
She said the dark was easier to hide dirt, and in her line of business, she believed in cleanliness and transparency.
I never understood what she meant, but I knew better than to ask.
Children were to be seen but not heard. I’d forgotten once and couldn’t walk for a week.
Without Viktor bringing food and water to my room, I might’ve starved.
Still, the sight of the girl—the housekeeper’s daughter that I’d played with the week before—naked, broken and battered, crying for me to help her, while the man—
I cut off my thoughts, biting the inside of my cheek.
Mother had said if I made a mistake like that again, she’d sell me with the next shipment, and I believed her.
She had little patience for what she called softness in me.
I’d tried to ask my father to get him to help, but he’d only shaken his head and told me to mind my mother.
“Hurry up,” she snapped. Realizing I’d slowed, I jogged a few steps to catch up.
She liked me exactly two steps behind her and one step to the side.
Her shadow, she said in a sickly-sweet tone to the buyers who came to inspect what she called merchandise.
It didn’t matter what she said; I still saw them as people.
“Sorry,” I said softly, trying not to wince as the crack of a whip hitting flesh could be heard as we walked past one of the rooms. I knew better than to look. The coppery smell of blood told me all I needed to know. Seeing it wouldn’t help the person in there or me.
“You turn ten today.”
The comment almost had me tripping, but I caught myself in time.
“Yes, Mother.” I wasn’t sure if it was a question or not, but not answering a question when there were so many tools at her disposal wasn’t a smart move.
Viktor and I already knew we needed to be smart if we were going to run away.
We had to watch and wait and grow strong so one day, we could run so far she nor our families would ever find us.
“And you finally seem to be absorbing your lessons.” Again, not a question. “Your father said you did well when you went with him on his business trip to France.”
At least my father only made me stay long enough to introduce me to his business partners before telling me to go play in one of the other rooms of our hotel suite.
He thought it was cute to show me off, telling them he was already training the “next generation,” much the way mother did.
I knew better than to tell either of them what I wanted to do when I grew up. They wouldn’t like the answer.
Compared to my mother, my father was easy. Be polite to his guests, and stay out of his way. I didn’t understand what his business was, but he traveled a lot. I tried to learn all I could about different countries so Viktor and I knew where we’d go after we ran.
“Then I guess it’s time to intensify your training. After all, I can’t expect you to be of any use to me if you can’t instill the same fear in others that I do.” She whirled around and leaned down until we were eye to eye. “But never forget, I will always be the one you’re afraid of most.”
She glared at me another minute, studying me up and down as if I’d grown overnight. I wished I had. I wished I’d grown as large as a man. If I were bigger than her, I wouldn’t have to listen to her anymore. I wouldn’t have to be afraid of her.