43. Jaxon
While Ava is out with Lucy having a girls’ afternoon, I take the time to catch up on work. There is a committee meeting next month, and I’m desperate to have everything done before then.
I run my fingers along my forehead as I read through the latest regulations for our district. I note down any questions I wish to raise when all the Alphas meet together.
A knock at my office door stirs me from my train of thought. I clear my throat. “Come in,” I demand as I twirl my pen between my fingers.
“Alpha.” Sam’s voice is hurried as he steps into the room. “Your shields have been up. I’ve been trying to mindlink you.”
“I’ve been busy focusing on work.”
“I need to tell you something.”
I sigh. “What is it, Sam?”
“Alpha Jaxon, when I tell you this, I need you to hear me out.” He steps towards my desk, and I lean back in my chair, already losing patience. “I know this is going to sound crazy, but you need to believe me.”
My teeth grind together. “For Goddess’s sake. What is it, Sam?”
I drop my pen onto my desk and fold my arms over my chest, quirking a brow in frustration. There is a look of distress that crosses his eyes before he closes them. and when he opens them again, he shudders. “After training with Evan, Kayden and I took him into town to show him around, and we–” He pauses to drag a hand down his face. “We saw someone.”
“Who?”
“Alpha, I know this is going to sound crazy–”
“Who, Sam?” My voice bellows across my office.
He gulps once. “Julia. We saw Julia. She’s still alive.”
No.
No.
No.
My blood runs ice cold. There is no chance. I saw the life leave her eyes. I watched as she was murdered by those rogues in the most brutal attack. I saw limbs. I saw blood. I heard her scream for her life.
For long moments, I say nothing. Processing. It’s impossible.
I stand from my desk on shaky legs. “That can’t be,” I state with confidence. “I saw her die. I was there when she died. There is no chance she could still be alive.”
Sam holds up his hands. “I know this sounds insane, but it was her. I swear on my life.”
“Where is Kayden?” I heave.
“With Evan. They’re coming now.”
I lick my bottom lip. “It can’t be her. You must be seeing things.”
“Alpha–”
Kayden steps into my office a second later, his eyes flicking over my expression—I presume to see how I’ve taken the bullshit news. It can’t be true. How can it be true? I’d know if she was alive. I’d feel the bond.
Wouldn’t I?
“You saw Julia?” My voice wobbles despite the heaviness of my chest.
Kayden’s dark eyes find mine as he nods. “Yeah. It was her.”
I stare at my Beta. Those words coming from his mouth makes my back turn rigid. My lungs constrict. He would never lie to me. He’s my second-in-command who I trust more than anyone in this pack.
My throat tightens around a ball of wariness.
“Did you speak to her?”
“No, we didn’t get close enough to speak to her.”
There is no way this is happening.
“I have to see her,” I blurt. “I need to know if this is real. I need to know what the fuck is going on and why I didn’t know a thing about it.”
My wolf is on edge, and I have to clench my fists to stop myself from shifting.
“Jaxon.” Kayden steps forward. “You need to listen to us.”
“What?” I snap. “What else do I need to listen to? You come in here and tell me my first mate is alive after being dead for over a year? Tell me how any of this makes any fucking sense!”
All the air in the room seems to have evaporated, and I’m barely holding on by a thread. I run a hand through my hair and grip the roots. No. This must be some misunderstanding.
“Something was off,” Kayden’s voice levels with mine. “She was with a few men we’ve never seen in town or the district before. She looks different. I didn’t get welcoming vibes from her at all.”
“Something was off?” I repeat with a scoff. “What does that even mean?”
“Well, why would she fake her own death?” Sam shouts over me. “If she was still alive, wouldn’t you be the first person she came to? This isn’t adding up, Jaxon. None of it is. You would have felt something. Don’t you think?”
Sam’s words trigger something inside me. My wolf hasn’t even flinched, and I would have felt something. If she was still alive, she’d come back for me. She knows where to find me. She knows how devastated I would have been.
My hands tremble with the need to smash my fist into something. I can’t grasp this situation. I can’t grasp my emotions. But something settles in my stomach like an anchor. This can’t be right.
Why hasn’t she come to see me?
A million questions fly through my mind, and I itch my head, but it doesn’t relieve anything. I’m bound by dread and panic. This doesn’t make sense.
I can’t ignore the way my wolf is clawing at the idea of being with Julia’s wolf again. But that’s only because he’s heard this information, not because of feeling her. Instead, we both feel nothing.
I hate the guilt that crashes over my sternum.
My entire life has changed in the last few months. The grief I endured to meet the most courageous and wonderful woman. We helped each other out of our darkest times. We found peace within our sanctuary of one another. Our safe space.
“Something didn’t feel right,” Sam says, snapping me back into the room.
“Did she see you?”
Kayden shakes his head. “She was gone in a flash. We couldn’t get to her.”
“Shit,” I rasp.
“And you’ve felt nothing?” Sam asks.
I shake my head. Nothing. Not even a twitch or an inkling she could be alive.
“Where is Ava?” Kayden asks suddenly.
“Out with Lucy.”
Sam and Kayden share a glance. “In town?”
My throat tightens. “Fuck.”
All of this must be a coincidence. A stupid, unbelievable mix-up. Nothing more.
Ava, are you okay?
Yeah. We’re just in town. Lucy’s been–
I’m washed with reassurance when I hear her delicate voice.
Leave. Now, I cut over her.
What? Why?
Please don’t ask any questions. I need you to get home as soon as possible. I’ll explain everything then.
There is immediate panic through our bond. Jaxon, you’re scaring me.
I clench my fists and order guards to escort them home from town. I refuse to take any chances, especially when I have no idea what’s going on. Baby, please just listen to me. Leave town. Come home. I’ve sent guards. I need you here with me right this second.
Okay. Her voice is shaky.
I close my eyes, but I won’t rest until she’s home. My head spins in different directions, but I know the bond I’ve grown with Ava over the last few months shines above it all.
A wave of nausea strangles me, an eerie sensation creeping up through my spine. “Once Ava is home and I know she’s safe, we’re going to get answers.”
“Yes, Alpha.” They both nod.