Chapter Fifteen Rage
Weeks have gone by since I last saw Rose or even talked to her.
That conversation we had on the phone was the last time I heard her voice and it is probably one of the worst memories I have.
Having to tell the woman that I know I truly love that I fucked up was horrible.
Knowing that she doesn’t believe me makes it all worse.
The saddest part is that I haven’t really been able to focus on everything going on between her and I because that phone call I got a few weeks ago led me to this apartment I am renting in the city.
I’m hiding so many secrets I feel like I am going to blow.
I haven’t even told any of my best friends what has been going on.
I’ve been trying to work everything out for myself and really, I don’t want to bring up any of this to my dad.
I don’t need him to know that I am exactly like he is.
That a woman had my kid and kept him from me for ten years.
Sure from what I have found out about Mason, his life with his mama wasn’t like mine at all.
At least I can take comfort in the fact that I knocked up a decent woman, both times I guess.
When I received that phone call and the social worker told me there was a ten year old boy who had my name on a birth certificate, I decided that a paternity test had to be done.
This boy needed me. His mother was killed in a car accident, Scarlett Cross.
I had dated her on and off as a teenager.
When she left I just thought her parents moved her, turns out her family was not very thrilled that the son of a biker knocked up their daughter so they sent her away.
I will never know why once she was away from her family she didn’t bother to get in touch with me and tell me I had a fucking son.
This whole thing has brought up more issues with women.
I never gave Scarlett any reason to be afraid of me or think that I would do wrong by my son.
But none of that really matters now because these past few weeks we got the paternity test done and he is mine.
I moved us into the apartment so that we can get familiar with each other and I have not told anyone because I know that my family can be overwhelming.
It might not make sense, but I want to be able to figure this out with him without anyone in my business.
Footsteps coming into the kitchen snap me out of my thoughts when I look over and see my boy.
“Hey buddy, how are you doing?”
I know it's a stupid question, his mama died.
He’s getting shoved into a place where he is living with a man he has never met being told he’s his father.
But looking at this boy I didn’t need to get a DNA test, he is a mini version of me and when my dad sees him he is going to know right away too. He is a mini Devil.
“I’m fine.” He whispers.
“Do you want some breakfast?”
“Yes, please.”
“Mase, buddy.” I say as I turn on the counter stool, “You can talk to me. I know this isn’t a situation you want to be in and I know you miss your mama, but I’m here for you buddy. I never want you to think that you are not in a space where you can’t talk to me. I want you to know that you are safe.
I know what it is like to be in this situation that you are in. Trust me. I might have been a little younger than you are, but I understand.”
He gets up on the stool next to me and looks at his hands.
“I miss my mom so much.”
I put my hand on his back, “I know you do buddy. I’m so sorry that you are going through all this. I would never wish this on you or anyone.”
I think for a moment before I continue. “Do you want me to give that therapist a call that your social worker gave me? We can schedule something, maybe even go together?”
I have never been to a therapist in my life and honestly, I kind of think maybe my dad should’ve put me in one after everything. Instead he thought that the acting out and the anger was something that needed to be dealt with in a violent physical way so he threw me into mma and boxing.
“I’d like to go, maybe by myself first.”
I nod my head, “I can do that bud. Now, what do you want for breakfast?”
“Can we get pancakes? Also can we do something today? Maybe go to a park or something?”
“I’ll have to call my president and let him know I can’t come in today. Do you maybe want to meet one of my friends? He’s got a little boy your age.”
He perks up at that, “Really? Yeah! I’d love that.”
“Alright, why don’t you head upstairs and get ready. I’ll make a couple of calls and then we can head out and get some pancakes. My cooking is horrible anyway.”
“I didn’t want to say anything, but yeah.”
I watch him walk upstairs and I take a deep breath before I pick up my phone to make a couple of calls.
“Hello?” a woman I don’t know answers.
I look down at the screen and see that I did in fact call Terror.
I clear my throat before I answer, “Um yeah, is Terror around?”
“Yeah he is, let me go grab him. He’s in the shower.”
“Alright thanks.”
Mystery woman answering Terror’s phone. Interesting. I’m going to make sure that I bug him about that later. He never lets anyone he’s with answer his phone. I have heard that he has been seeing Ruby, a woman on staff at Daisy’s Ink, but he’s never confirmed anything.
“Thanks, baby.” I hear and then I hear a kiss from the other end of the line. “What’s up Rage?”
“Wow, you have a woman answering your phone now?”
“Shut the fuck up. Everyone knows I’m with Ruby or maybe they don’t I don’t give a fuck.”
“Okay, I guess I was out of the loop. I thought you were just feeling around. Didn’t know your divorce was final. I thought that was your hold up.”
“That happened a while ago, brother. Thank fuck. That bitch finally let me go and gave up her rights to the kids.”
“Well, shit. Where have I been while all this was happening?”
“Gonna be real honest with you here Rage, you’ve been a little all over the place. We’ve been a little worried. Now you’ve barely been around the clubhouse or even your house the last few weeks. I don’t know what’s going on with you,
but you’ve been off since the beginning of the year when mama died.”
“Yeah, I know. Sorry. I’m trying to get my act together.” I peer over my shoulder and see that Mason is still not around.
“Well that’s good because I think Devil has been close to wanting to kill you.”
I chuckle, “Yeah it definitely has been close there. Still got some issues there, but that’s not something we need to worry about. I just wanted to call and let you know I’m taking a sick day.
I’ve got some shit that has come up and wanted to take care of it so I'm gonna be a little unreachable today.”
“Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, it’s fine. I’ll fill you in sometime soon.”
“Alright, well take care of your shit. I’m gonna go.”
I hear giggling in the background and sounds that I do not want to hear following.
“Yeah, bye brother.”
I hang up the phone before I make my next phone call to Lash. This is going to be a rough explanation, so maybe I will just text him to meet Mason and I at one of the diners in town. Mind made up, I pull up our text thread.
Me: Hey brother, I need a huge favor today.
Lash: What do you want, asshole?
Me: Can you get away from the shop today and meet me at Frankie’s for breakfast and bring Declan?
Lash: This is a very interesting request. I don’t know. I’ll have to run it by my mom to see if Declan can miss some of school today. Why what is up?
Me: I’d rather explain it in person, but I really would love it if Declan can be there. It would help me out tremendously and can you keep this shit between us? I’m not ready for this information to get out.
Lash: Alright, you are paying for breakfast. You interrupted mine. I thought it was a fucking emergency and with the way your ass has been lately, I didn’t know if I was going to have to bail your ass out of jail.
Lash: Oh and by the way, when I say breakfast I mean you interrupted my favorite breakfast. So you owe me more than breakfast. I’m going to have blue fucking balls all day.
Me: What is with you and your brother-in-law? You can’t handle like two fucking minutes without trying to fuck your women? I mean I can guarantee that you already got some this morning so stop being fucking greedy.
Lash: What brother-in-law are you talking about? Nevermind don’t tell me that. You know what, you are right, I did wake up with my woman’s mouth around my cock and get some great morning sex from it. I want to knock her ass up again.
Me: Would you let the woman fucking breathe? I swear your ass needs to learn what birth control is. She just had fucking twins and been woke up from a coma. You’re already trying to get her to have more of your spawns.
Lash: Shut up or I will not bring my child to this breakfast of yours. Declan does not need to hear all the mean things you say about his dad.
Me: You’re stupid. Meet me there in like thirty minutes. Does that give you enough time for a quickie?
Lash: Bless you.
Getting to the diner about twenty five minutes later, I decided to take a booth where I could watch the door. I had Mason slide in before me.
“So are we meeting your friend here?”
“Yeah, bud we are meeting my friend and I asked him to bring his boy along so that you could meet a new friend.”
He nods his head before he goes back to looking at the menu.
I look over at him and know that I have to figure out what to do for him for school.
I might even bring this up to Lash, but I don’t know when I want everyone to know about Mason yet.
We are still trying to figure this thing out and I really don’t want to do anything to jeopardize that.
It is not too long before the bell above the door chimes and I glance up and see Lash come in with Declan.
They both look around like they are trying to find me and when Lash’s eyes land on me at the table he smiles, until they move towards my boy sitting next to me.
I see him mouth ‘ What the fuck.” before he heads our way.
Declan gets to me first and walks up giving me a side hug before he slides into the booth across from Mason. I look up and Lash is standing there staring at me. I point to the seat across from me.
“Are you going to sit down?”
“No, I need your help with something outside.”