Chapter 5
There was no way for Todd to know just how much Olivia wished she could open up to him about her past. But this early in the game—and she knew it was a game—she wasn’t going to spill all her dark secrets. Not since it was clear that he had some of his own.
Rangers? She was going to have to do a little more research on just what that meant. From what she knew, he was part of a top military group, the guys and gals that went in and did the jobs no one else could.
She looked over him again and wondered just how the job had changed him. She knew several other ex-military personnel. Some had PTSD, while a few others didn’t.
From looking at how well Todd fit into the group of people gathered at Crystal’s place, she somehow doubted he was affected much, but she knew that some people hid their pain very well.
“So,” Todd said with a sigh, “Simona seems happy enough playing with CJ now.” He motioned with his beer, and she glanced over to see her daughter being swung in circles by CJ. Both kids were laughing and having a great time together.
“Yeah, they’re like brother and sister at this point.” She smiled.
“Really?” The tone in Todd’s voice had her looking back at him.
“Yes.” She frowned. “Why?”
“It’s nothing. I just...” He stopped talking and started laughing, then motioned to where her daughter stood over CJ. Her little hands were balled into fists, and CJ was holding his left eye.
She thrust her wine glass at Todd and rushed over and pulled Simona off the bigger and older boy.
“What is going on?” she asked, trying to keep her voice quiet.
CJ stood up, still holding his eye, and said quickly. “It was my fault. I shouldn’t have teased her.”
Just then Kayla came into the room and, seeing her son holding his eye, rushed over to them.
“What happened?” Kayla knelt before her son and gently pulled his hand aside to expose a very bright red eye.
“I fell,” CJ said, looking over to Simona, who was looking a little guilty and sad.
“Oh, well, let’s go get some ice on that eye.” Kayla took her son’s hand and led him out of the room.
Olivia knelt before Simona and lowered her voice to a whisper.
“Did you hit him?” she asked. Seeing the guilt in her daughter’s eyes, she sighed. “You need to go and apologize. Immediately.”
“He said I laughed funny.” Simona crossed her arms over her chest and stuck out her bottom lip, a move Olivia knew all too well.
The girl had obviously inherited her stubborn gene from her side of the family.
“I don’t care what he said. It’s never okay to hit someone else,” she answered automatically.
“Well, now, that’s not necessarily the truth,” Todd said from directly behind her.
Then he shocked her by kneeling down and talking softly to Simona.
Instantly, Olivia wanted to correct him, to tell him to stay out of her parenting business, but he continued.
“If someone bigger than you is picking on you or doing something bad, really bad to you, by all means, punch, kick, or scream at them and yell for help all you want.” She understood what he was talking about now and let him continue.
After all, as a parent, she’d had a few discussions about not talking to strangers or what to do if someone was hurting her.
Obviously, her talks hadn’t stuck, since Simona had bumped into a stranger last night and had let him drag her back to the pizzeria.
Thankfully, back into her arms. But still…
“But if someone is calling you names, especially someone you consider a friend…” He let that last word hang in the air.
“Friends don’t hit friends,” he said softly, as he took her smaller hand in his. “Understand?”
Simona’s eyes moved to hers as she nodded. “What about daddies? What happens when they hit mommies?”
Olivia tensed and kept her eyes glued to Simona.
“Sweetie,” she said as tears started stinging her eyes. She’d believed her daughter to be too young to remember. How many times had Simona witnessed Brock hitting her? She’d tried very hard to shelter her from those moments. Obviously, she’d failed at that, as well.
“Well, then it’s okay for you to tell someone, another grown-up. Someone who will get your mommy help. Like a teacher or another adult,” he answered smoothly. “Why don’t you head in and apologize to CJ. Since he already covered for you, I’m sure he’s going to forgive you.”
Simona nodded slightly and then sighed and looked over at her. “I’m sorry, Mommy,” she said, and threw herself at her. Olivia hugged her daughter as a tear slipped down her cheek.
“I love you, baby,” she said softly. She kissed her cheek. Simona turned and rushed from the room.
Todd stood up and held out his hand to help her stand up.
“It’s not always as cut and dried as kids make things out to be,” he said.
“Oh?”
“Sometimes there are other reasons behind someone’s pain.”
She watched his eyes turn dark, and she realized that maybe he had experienced more in his past than she’d first believed.
“You?” she asked.
He motioned towards the French doors that led out towards Crystal’s garden area.
She walked over, opened the door, and stepped out into the warm summer evening with Todd at her back. She didn’t stop until they reached the bench in the center of Crystal’s little oasis.
“This is impressive,” he said, looking around.
“You should see it in full daylight,” she suggested as she sat down.
He walked over and sat next to her.
“After my father died, my mother… turned into someone else.” He leaned back in the chair. “It wasn’t necessarily the pinching, the slaps, or the pushes that hurt. It was the names, the verbal abuse, that stung the most.” He sighed. “Mental abuse can last years; bruises fade in days.”
She had never heard anyone else describe it so well. Then again, she’d never talked to anyone else about it. Everyone seemed so concerned about bringing it up around her that they remained silent.
“Sometimes the silence hurts as much as words,” she said. She stilled when she realized she’d said it out loud.
“It’s better to talk about it than to keep it bottled inside,” he suggested. “I spent almost two years hiding from the truth.”
“The truth?”
“About my mother. The first couple years I was in the Army, I kept everything bottled inside.”
“What changed?”
“I met friends. People who had gone through similar childhoods.” He reached over and took her hand in his.
“The moment I was accepted into the Special Operations Forces, I took the chance and opened up to my team after a few of the others started talking in training. It was the best thing I ever did.”
She thought about opening up to someone. Anyone. Just to let them know what she’d gone through, what Brock had done to her. The hell she’d lived in for years and had been too ashamed to admit, sometimes even to herself.
But the fact was, it was far too soon to open up to Todd.
“Thank you for talking to Simona,” she said, changing the subject quickly. “I’ve had a few talks with her about stuff like that, but coming from you, I’ll think she’ll finally listen.”
He smiled and dropped her hand. “I’d better get going.” He stood up. “See you Thursday?”
She nodded and then watched him walk away. Part of her wanted to call him back, to tell him everything, this man that she’d only met yesterday. But she just watched him walk away, realizing she couldn’t wait until Thursday.
When she walked into the kitchen, Simona was sitting on the counter next to CJ. The pair of them were laughing as they ate popsicles.
“Everything okay?” she asked, walking over to lean on the counter next to Kayla.
“Yes, Simona was just telling us how it’s okay sometimes to hit, but not when it’s your best friend.” Kayla glanced at her, and Olivia understood that the kids had made up. She also understood the love in Kayla’s eyes. Their kids had admitted that they were best friends.
For the next hour, the party raged on, as much as a party that included the young and the old alike could rage on. Kids ran around the house, ate sugar, ran some more, grew tired, and bugged their parents until finally everyone was shuffling out of the house.
Olivia carried a very sleepy Simona into the house and figured that she’d have to make at least two more rounds to the car to gather all the presents she’d been given, including Todd’s flowers.
Simona had talked about them the entire ride home while holding them up to her face.
“These are my first ever flowers,” she’d said several times. “Boys are supposed to give girls flowers, right?”
“Some boys do,” she had said, glancing back at her daughter in the mirror, only to realize she’d fallen asleep with her face in the soft fragrant petals.
Olivia had to admit, she was sort of jealous. She’d never gotten flowers from a man. Ever.
Brock had never gone for that sort of thing and always brushed off anniversaries, birthdays, or holidays, claiming it was just a ploy to make businesses more money.
Since she worked for a business that paid her to make them money, she had tried to argue that it wasn’t just a ploy, that it paid people like her a salary.
Still, when they’d ended up fighting over it, she’d dropped the subject and had never expected so much as a card for her birthday from him.
Her parents had never really taken joy in the day she’d been born. Nor any other day. She was what some called a second-thought child. After they’d had her, they’d had second thoughts.
From as long as she could remember, she’d raised herself. This, of course, had made her want to be out on her own. So, naturally, she’d taken up and run away with the first man who’d shown her attention. Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
She had to admit, though, now that Brock was out of the picture, life was looking nearly perfect. She was happier than she had ever been. She loved her job, her home, her child, and being a mother.