Chapter Thirteen #2
‘I wish. Unfortunately not. Anyway, she came over at the weekend with those three hell-spawn she calls “her boys” and told me she had the most perfect date lined up for me. A colleague of Richard’s, apparently.’
‘Hahahaha. No!’
‘Oh, yes! She knew if she came in person it would be harder for me to wriggle out of. Before I knew what had happened she had not just found a woman but booked a bloody table at a restaurant of her – her as in Marion, not the date’s – choosing.
For tonight. I can’t even begin to imagine who she’s found.
And whether or not the poor woman has been coerced as I have.
Although I suppose that wouldn’t be too bad.
We could just bolt dinner if that was the case and escape.
Will you stop laughing? It’s not funny, this is my life! ’
‘I’m sorry, but this is joyful. Alex McKenzie, foreign correspondent brought to his knees by the head of a village PTA.’
‘I think we all know there’s more to her than the one role.’
‘Hahaha, still hilarious.’
‘Well, when you’ve finished amusing yourself perhaps you could help me. I don’t want to be rude to my upcoming date, but how the hell do I get out of this?’
‘You can’t.’
‘What do you mean I can’t? You’re supposed to be helping.’
‘I am. How is being dishonest or lying to you helping? You have to go and hope this woman has a modicum of common sense.’ Sylvie paused to laugh again as Alex gave her a piercing look indicating exactly how likely he found this.
‘She might have! Anyway, with any luck she has some basic human understanding and you could try to tell her that you find her charming but this was very much Marion’s idea and you’re not interested right now. ’
‘That seems a bit lame.’
‘Look, Marion’s already picked and booked the restaurant. Just face it, she’s utterly emasculated you already. This is the most sensible way. And besides, seeing as you are normally very optimistic, have you considered that you may actually be attracted to Marion’s pick? It is a possibility.’
‘No, no, it’s not.’
‘Yes, yes, it is. From what I understand, she’s pretty thorough. She’s not going to find you someone that’s not suitable, so this could be the start of something beautiful. You’re looking at this all wrong. You should be embracing this opportunity.’
‘Are you taking the piss?’
‘No, maybe a little, but not really. Consider it. This should be exciting, not terrifying. Your perfect woman waiting for you, right there, tonight. This time next year I could be buying a hat and you might ask Marion to be your best man.’
‘This isn’t funny.’
‘Why are you not looking on the positive? Why are you sabotaging this? I wish I had someone to set dates up for me. I’ve forgotten what going on a date is like.’
‘Really?’
‘No, not really, I haven’t got time for that sort of thing at the moment. Imminent homelessness tends to rejig one’s priorities.’
‘You’re not really imminently homeless, plus today you got a job and the opportunity to set up your ballet school. If we’re talking about this time next year, you could be a millionaire.’
‘Hahaha.’
‘It’s as likely as me marrying Claudia.’
‘Oh, the gift that keeps giving. Is she called Claudia?’
‘It’s a nice name.’
‘It is. And we shouldn’t judge on names. But it’s not really very approachable, is it? It’s not Sarah or something. I’m already a bit intimidated and I haven’t got to meet her.’
‘Idiot. Judgemental idiot at that.’
‘Yep, but seriously, give me three good reasons for not marrying Claudia.’
‘I’ve never met her. I reckon that’s a good reason.’
‘Nah, arranged marriages actually have quite high rates of success. Two more, please.’
‘I think not having met her is pretty strong. How about, I don’t want a relationship of any type right now.’
‘Why on earth not? You’re an attractive man.
’ Sylvie was very glad her blushing was more under control, but he was a very attractive man.
She fell asleep most nights thinking about how attractive he was.
Probably best not to mention this here. She kind of agreed with Marion, it did seem a shocking waste.
Not only was he ludicrously sexy but he made great coffee, was fab with kids, and as yet she hadn’t been able to find a single flaw.
Although perhaps this was it. Perhaps he had commitment issues.
Perfect. That was definitely a flaw. She had that one as well.
‘Well, thank you, I think. But that doesn’t mean anything.’
‘It does.’
‘Yeah, in a last-century attractive-people-are-duty-bound-to-procreate kind of way. And we’re not in the last century, we’re living in a time where as long as all choices are consensual then anything goes. And my choice is not to date.’
‘Well, you’re not doing very well at that, are you? Oh, this cake is delicious. If you marry Claudia is she going to stop me coming around every day?’
‘If you don’t shut up about Claudia I’m going to stop you coming around every day.’
‘Um… Alex, the children are very quiet. Should we be worried?’
‘That’s a good point. See, I can’t have a relationship – the one female I have in my life takes every minute of every day. How on earth is there room for any more?’
‘Yeah, for all my teasing, that’s exactly how I feel. I kind of need to get to grips with the parenting thing and make sure Sam gets the best of me – that seems a lot more important than dating right now.’
‘Right. Exactly, so you do understand. That’s what I’m saying.’ Alex got up from the table and wandered over to the kitchen window. ‘Oh, look, they’re fine. No trouble at all. Still playing teddy Olympics.’
Sylvie pushed her chair back and came and stood by his side, having to squidge up quite close to be at the correct angle to see Sam and Ellie. Alex didn’t move, but seemed happy with her squidging.
‘Is Ellie in the tree? Should she be?’
‘Oh, yeah, that’s fine. She does it all the time. I know it looks like laissez-faire parenting but I’m actually teaching her to manage risk and assess situations.’
‘Is that what it is?’ She smiled up at him, aware of her closeness and really wishing in that moment that she was Claudia and that Alex was looking for something.
In this moment, she’d probably take anything.
Just standing next to him, he seemed so big, so masculine, and she had always been so attracted to big and masculine.
And then on top of that he was him, and she really rather liked him.
‘That’s exactly what it is. Look how happy they are.
’ And without seemingly even thinking he popped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her in.
‘See, it’s perfect.’ And he wasn’t far wrong.
Sylvie found herself thinking she could stay like this for ever and used every ounce of self-control not to breathe him in.
That way danger lay. Plus, what if he thought she was trying to sniff him?
That would just be weird. Why was breathing normally suddenly so difficult?
She thought she heard a funny scraping noise behind her, but nothing was going to get her to break this squeeze up now. You had to take the tiny pleasures in life where you could find them.
‘Coo-ee, only me. Thought I’d let myself in. Oh. Oh, dearie me, no, no, no, no!’