Second First Dates

Leti

For the first time in four years, I’m officially dating again.

My phone pings after my last swipe, alerting me of a match. As Julian Gutierrez’s boyish grin lights up my screen, I can’t help but return his smile. Never mind that there’s no one around to see me cheesing in my bedroom on a random Tuesday night, but I digress.

He has tan skin, dark hair, and if his profile is anything to go by, a personality on par with his aesthetic attractiveness.

The smile in his first photo, which captivated me from the get-go, extends to kind, sparkling brown eyes that would surely melt me to the floor if I saw them in person.

On top of that, his hair is a bit long in that wavy, slightly messy way that’s always been my type when it comes to men.

He’s wearing black-framed glasses in his third photo, which nearly did me in.

As I read more about him—high school American history teacher, demisexual, enjoys long romantic walks, witty banter, and a good rom-com in book or movie form—the more intrigued I am to get to know this guy.

I’d barely finished going through his profile before swiping right and was immediately notified that we’re a match.

Despite my excitement, there’s something familiar about Julian that’s nagging me, but I can’t place where I could possibly know him from.

It’s times like these when I wish regular people had an IMDb profile I could look up at any given time and go, Oh, yeah, you were the boy who sat behind me in sociology class six years ago—that’s where I know you from!

Not that I took a sociology class in college, but still.

My phone pings with a message from him, and another smile can’t help but inch its way across my face.

Julian: Leticia Maldonado, as I live and breathe.

I furrow my brows as I read the message. Is this his idea of a pickup line, or have I met him before? He sends a follow-up before I can overthink it.

Julian: So you’re into Stardew Valley, huh? Which NPC did you marry?

Leti: Do you play? As a streamer, I’ve married all of them at one point or another, but Harvey’s always been my favorite.

Julian: Just started on PC and I have no idea what I’m doing

Julian: So, Harvey, huh? I feel like I have a pretty strong resemblance to the guy. Are you telling me you have a type?

Leti: Now that you mention it, aside from your lack of a mustache, I can see it.

Julian: Say the word, and I’ll grow one. I can’t promise great results, but at the very least that’s where stick-ons come in handy.

I can’t help it. I let out an honest to god giggle.

It’s enough that I barely recognize myself.

I live in snark like it’s a second skin.

I don’t giggle at things cute strangers say to me through DMs. I shouldn’t already be this happy about flirting with a stranger online, especially since the last time I got involved with someone behind a screen she ended up falling for someone else.

Which is why I’m not making the same mistake again. As soon as I find the right moment, I’m going to ask Julian on an in-person date. Better to know right away if we’re compatible rather than waste months on a text relationship going nowhere.

Leti: No need. You’re pretty cute already, the stick-ons might give you a complex.

Julian: I appreciate you for noticing how cute I am.

Julian: I nearly choked on my coffee when I swiped to your third picture, btw. I knew you were beautiful, but damn, you in that baby blue dress nearly stopped me from breathing.

He’s referring to a picture my best friend, Bella, took of me last month.

I’d bought the dress a few years ago when it was on mega-sale and two sizes too big, and now the thing fits me like a glove.

Three and a half mimosas into brunch and feeling myself, Bella had me pose in front of a bush near our table with these pretty, white blooming flowers.

“Get my good side,” I remember telling her, holding up my drink as I kicked a leg up Princess Diaries style and turned my head over my right shoulder to smile at her phone lens.

There’s a sort of “come hither” vibe to my sly smile, but the round apples of my cheeks soften the look so I’m more innocent than sexy. Coupled with the dress that rides up my thigh and highlights every curve on my body, I sort of feel bad for the guy—which is not a feeling I’m used to.

Back in college, I would’ve hated how the photo turned out.

It used to be so easy to pick myself apart: My cheeks are too round, the dress is too tight around my middle, everyone can see the cellulite on my thighs.

At some point, I got older and started saying “fuck that” to the voice in my head and allowed myself to believe when people tell me I’m beautiful.

Who am I to question their entirely correct opinion?

Maybe that’s why I’m not at all surprised by Julian’s reaction, though I am pleased by it.

Julian: Actually, I did stop breathing for a moment there. I choked on my oatmeal and my roommate almost had to do the Heimlich maneuver on me.

Leti: You poor thing.

Julian: Cruel woman. Does my pain mean nothing to you?

Leti: There, there.

Leti: I can’t imagine how you would’ve explained that to the paramedics.

Julian: Easy. They’d understand perfectly after I showed them your picture.

Julian: Wow, I can’t believe how easy this is.

Leti: How easy what is?

Julian: Talking to you. Last time didn’t work out so well for me…

I assume he means the last time he matched with someone. To be honest, I’m a little surprised talking to him is so easy too.

Leti: I get it, believe me. I haven’t dated in a few years so I thought this would be much harder.

Three dots appear and disappear for a few minutes as he types his reply, ratcheting up my anxiety.

Then they disappear entirely. Guess I spoke too soon.

I bite my nail for a moment, thinking. Was I too honest?

Is he unsure of how to respond? Maybe we need more harmless small talk before we start divulging our dating histories.

Leti: So, rom-coms, huh? Do you have any favorites I should know about?

His reply is immediate, and I breathe a sigh of relief.

Julian: Too many to name. I don’t want to overwhelm you.

Leti: I understand, it’s like asking me to pick a favorite video game. The answer changes every week.

Julian: Exactly!

Leti: We should see a rom-com together. Dinner and a movie is the perfect first date, right?

Minutes go by without a reply, and doubt starts to creep in again. It’s not exactly the smoothest transition, but I can’t risk liking him any more than I do without a clear indication that this is going somewhere. Hence, the blunt ask-out.

Leti: I really like talking to you, and I think we’d have a lot of fun together. How does next Saturday sound?

An entire hour passes without a response, effectively bursting my bubble. I guess what they say is true—if he seems too good to be true, he probably is.