Chapter 29 #3
Hockey was what I always wanted. But when Josie had come along, my priorities shifted. Getting on the ice was no longer the best part of my day. And knowing that Chloe hadn’t had the same revelation about our daughter just made me really sad for her.
“I’m sorry you feel lost, Chloe,” I said, and really meant it. “I hope you can figure out what you’re looking for. But in the meantime, you can’t tug Josie around. You can’t keep confusing her.”
“I never meant to confuse her,” she began, but I wasn’t done.
“Look, our daughter doesn’t actually require much from you, Chloe. She’s pretty damn smart and incredibly resilient. She’d be happy with regular phone calls. A few visits a year. Enough to let her know that you actually give a damn.”
“Of course I give a damn.” All of the whine had left her tone. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I was talking to the real Chloe, without all the self-pity, without the facade of the perfectly-put-together, designer-style, cool girl she usually tried to project.
“Then prove it,” I told her bluntly. “Don’t show up here talking like you might stick around. Don’t give her false hope. Just call her once in a while. Make plans to see her and stick to them. It really isn’t that hard.”
She was silent for a long moment. “Because you’re the one that does the hard part,” she finally murmured.
“You’re the one who’s there day in and day out.
” I could hear her swallow heavily on the other end of the phone.
“I appreciate that, Liam. You’re a wonderful father and our daughter is lucky to have you. ”
“I’m the lucky one.” And it was true. Josie was a gift I could never begin to deserve.
She laughed softly. “The fact that you see it that way proves my point.”
I didn’t bother responding. I didn’t need Chloe to validate my abilities as a father. I’d been doubting myself for months but I was done with that now. I knew, deep down, that Josie and I were going to be okay.
I glanced at the dashboard clock. Our conversation had eaten up a good chunk of my free hour. “I need to get to the rink,” I told her. “Are you planning to come back to Austin or are you heading back to New York?”
“What do you think I should do?” she asked, voice small. “What do you think is best for Josie?”
Honestly, I had no idea. But I did know that a lot of the pain of the last few months had come because Josie and I weren’t talking to each other. That needed to end. “I’ll talk to her,” I finally said. “See how she feels about it. Then we can go from there.”
Chloe let out a long breath and I couldn’t tell if she was relieved or disappointed. “Okay. I’ll leave it up to the two of you.”
That was about the most mature response I’d gotten from her in ages. “Thank you.”
“I really am sorry, Liam.”
I was pretty sure I believed her. “You can do better, Chloe,” I said. “I know you can.”
The tremor was back in her voice. “Thank you. I guess I’ll talk to you soon.”
“Okay.” Just as I was about to end the call, a woman passed my car on her way into the building.
She didn’t look a thing like Grace but she was wearing a green blouse—one that had me remembering the first night we’d spent together, when I’d peeled it from her body. “Hang on,” I blurted out. “Chloe?”
“I’m still here.”
I closed my eyes. “Can you clear something up for me?”
Her tone was guarded. “What’s up?”
“This might sound crazy, but I’ve been thinking about high school a lot. And prom. Did you…do you remember saying something to Grace Knight back then?” God, I probably sounded like a fucking idiot. What thirty-year-old man would still be caught up on his high school prom?
Chloe was quiet for a long moment. “I shouldn’t have done that,” she finally said. “I knew how you felt about her. I guess I was jealous.”
My breath caught. “You did say something to her.”
She sighed. “I told her we were dating and the whole prom thing was a misunderstanding.”
A flash of anger sparked in my belly. “You lied to her.”
She didn’t try to deny it. “You still like her, don’t you?”
I definitely didn’t want to have this conversation with her.
When I didn’t respond, she went on, her voice wistful now.
“You always did have a thing for her. I shouldn’t have gotten in the way.
” Then she brightened. “But if I hadn’t, we probably wouldn’t have had Josie.
” I bit back a snort. Did she want me to thank her?
“For what it’s worth, Liam, I think she still has feelings for you, too. She sure as shit didn’t look too happy to see me in her classroom the other day.”
No, I didn’t imagine she would have been. “Chlo, I have to get going. I’ll talk to you soon.”
I didn’t wait for her to respond before ending the call. I needed to get to practice. And then I needed to talk to Andrew Knight.
There were plenty of things I could blame for coming in between Grace and I over the years.
Chloe’s interference, misunderstandings, her brother’s opinion, our careers.
But the truth was, I could have done more to fight for her.
And I was done sitting on the bench, just hoping things would turn out in my life.
I was ready to do whatever it took to get the girl.