Chapter 10 - Poppy
I don’t know what comes over me, but I fling my arms around Damian’s neck and tilt my head to deepen the kiss. Starved of this kind of intimacy for a decade, I want to use it as an excuse. But the truth is, it’s only Damian’s lips I want on mine.
I’m throwing caution to the wind, clinging to him as if his breath feeds me life. Not wanting to chastise myself for how good this feels, I try making excuses up in my head.
Maybe I’m doing this to distract him from the fact that one of those bags I packed contains Daniel’s clothes.
Or maybe I’m saying goodbye for the last time, one fleeting moment of passion before my son and I leave for good.
But I’m only lying to myself, and I can’t pretend anymore.
This feels too good.
Almost too good to be true, and reality would be blurred if it weren’t for the placement of his hands on my hips pulling me closer, or the reunion of our tongues after a decade-long drought.
Every inch of my body is ignited just from the kiss, our tongues dancing in perfect synchrony, his breath hot in my mouth, tasting sweet and delectable.
I’d almost forgotten how good this was. Ten years of stifled passion comes crashing into the kiss to make it even better than it used to be. There’s a dull ache on my neck where he’d bitten me last night, the gentle throb echoing the motion of our kisses.
It only takes a couple of seconds for me to forget the fight I’ve been putting up since he kidnapped me to Cedar Valley, for my walls to completely crumble as if none of the anger matters.
And when I break the kiss to catch my breath, at the sight of him, hair disheveled, lips swollen and moist with my saliva, the floodgates of my existence open up.
Meeting his heady blue eyes that have turned nearly jet-black, save for the ring of blue around the black orbs, my heart skips a beat, pulse racing.
His mark on my neck throbs in a way that sends awareness down to my core, and despite the impossible heat on every inch of my body, the pendant on my neck feels hot against my skin, like the metal just bloomed with the heat I’m feeling.
Like a gentle reassurance that maybe, just maybe, it’s not the worst thing if I gave in to this intense desire.
Damian’s breath comes out in hot pants, his chest heaving with so much ferocity that it strains the buttons on his shirt.
“Poppy…” he breathes, still holding on to my hips, refusing to let go as he keeps me pressed to his manhood.
My fingers tingle with need, and it’s why I grab fistfuls of his shirt, holding on for stability, for the sake of my sanity.
Because truthfully, this is insane.
“What are we doing?” he asks, breathlessly voicing the question running through my own mind.
I can hardly form a coherent thought, let alone a response, when he begins to smooth his palms on my sides.
Gulping hard, my eyes flicker to his lips, still gleaming with my saliva, and I’m reminded of the first time we kissed, the first time we made love, the first time he told me he loved me.
And maybe I’m being too optimistic with my thoughts, but I can’t seem to find a single reason that I shouldn’t be right here in his arms.
Damian leans in when I hesitate to answer, his hot breath fanning my lips, the warmth a stark contrast to the cool moisture on my lips, and it’s the slightest sensation that spreads through my body. I shudder, chest heaving against his, my nipples erect and sending even more sensation to my core.
“I’m going to kiss you again if you don’t stop me,” he warns as he comes even closer, citrus hanging on my lips as his scent envelops me.
I bat my eyelids softly as I stare into his domineering eyes, glossed over with lust, and my heart explodes.
Every second spent apart crashes into me like a storm, and all the anger, all the hurt, turns into something else. Something more dangerous. Lust. Wanton need. Yearning for the arms of the only man I have ever loved.
And even if that love has been ripped apart and replaced by anger, all I can find now is the desperate need to feel his lips on mine again.
“I won’t stop you…” I breathe, and when his lips conquer mine in a passionate, feverish kiss, I realize that it’s more than just this kiss I want.
I want his hands all over me, just as they are now, roaming the flesh beneath my T-shirt as he moans on the kiss, telling me how desperate he is to touch me.
My mind slips into a void of thoughtlessness, where the only thing I can focus on is his hands as they slide under my bra and he captures the mounds of my breasts with a fervent groan.
He breaks the kiss to stare into my eyes with hunger flashing freely, and a smirk of satisfaction curls his impossibly plump lips.
When he swipes his tongue across his bottom lip with anticipation, I already know what’s about to happen before my T-shirt drifts over my head.
Deftly unclipping my bra, he draws down the straps with deliberate slowness, studying my face for every slight reaction until it’s down my arms and he tosses it to the side.
In one swift motion, he leans down and wraps his lips over one ripe bud, one hand kneading the mound into his mouth while the other finds purchase on the small of my back to pull me toward him.
My back arches as I wrap my arms around his neck, craving so much closeness that it drives me to the brink of insanity.
His guttural growls against my flesh ignite goosebumps across my skin, his pleasure sounding like music to my ears as my own moans are added. Between my thighs, my panties are drenched, and I’m close to losing my mind with the desperate, almost painful need to feel his touch down there.
“Please, Damian…” I mewl as he grazes his teeth on my nipple. “Please!”
He draws back and pulls his lips off with a lewd pop, then meets my eyes with devilish hunger.
“What are you asking for, Poppy?” he asks in a low, gravelly tone, sliding his hand from my back to my pelvis. “You want me to touch you? Want me to make you come?”
All I can manage is a strained, hoarse sound ripping from my throat, and before I can even attempt a nod, he swoops me up in his strong, capable arms and carries me to the bed.
He lays me down gently, straightening up to remove every layer of his clothing until he’s left in his undershorts, taking his sweet time as he watches me through hooded eyes as I rake my gaze across every inch of his toned body.
Muscles contour his arms, his shoulders, his chest, and even his thighs.
But there’s one muscle, rigid and ready, that my eyes land on, and I lick my lips in anticipation, recalling the delicious stretch every time he entered me.
I suck in a deep breath as he goes for my pants, hooking his fingers between the waistbands of both the layers I still have on. I lift my hips slightly as he pulls my pants and panties off my legs, and he drops to his knees and hooks mine over his shoulders.
Gasping in surprise when he tugs me forward abruptly, I barely have time to catch my breath when he dips his head between my thighs and sucks on my bundle of nerves.
“Oh, Goddess, Damian!” I exclaim, carding my fingers through the loose curls at the top of his head.
Every flick of his tongue, every suckle of his lips, draws me closer to the brink of climax, and when he adds a finger to his ministrations, stroking my folds before thrusting into my aching hole with the single digit, I cry out in ecstasy, his name rolling off my tongue like a prayer for mercy.
Damian pops his lips from my clit, sliding up as he quickens the pace, thrusting back and forth with his finger, and he hovers over me, staring deeply into my eyes like he’s about to snatch my soul.
“Come for me, baby,” he coerces me in a husky tone, kissing my lips so I can taste myself on his tongue. “That’s it… Just like that…”
His encouraging voice, coupled with the sorcery he performs with his hand between my thighs, one finger curling inside me as he finds the soft, squishy spot to tap on while the apple of his palm hits my clit has me bursting.
I unravel under his touch, under his gaze, wailing from the amount of sheer pleasure that causes every inch of my body to tingle.
I see stars behind my eyelids as I soar across the planes of pleasure, and it’s only when he kisses my lips and breathes life back to me that I realize he’s settled between my thighs.
Ravenous and greedy, I reach between our bodies and take his cock into my hand, feeling the velvet shaft throb against my touch as he groans. He grazes my bottom lip with his teeth as he breaks the kiss, eyes glowing like obsidian crystals as he stares at me.
“You want this cock, don’t you…” He smirks as he grinds himself into my hand, mimicking slow, lazy thrusts if he were inside me.
“Yes,” I whisper, throwing my head back as I line the tip of his cock with my needy hole.
He chuckles as he drops his head to the crook of my neck where he’d bitten me to mark me as his mate, peppering open-mouthed kisses on my sensitive flesh as he slowly slides his length into me.
I’d forgotten how thick he was, and the stretch almost startles me before the tight fit brings more pleasure than I could have imagined. And when he starts thrusting, working his way toward a comfortable pace, I grab his face and kiss him frantically.
I’m so close to another orgasm, the knot in the pit of my belly so close to exploding outward, that it takes every ounce of focus not to release. Not yet. My inner wolf demands that I come with him, and when he lets out a croaky groan against my lips, I know he’s close.
I break the kiss, but his forehead plants on mine as he continues to thrust, going deeper when I wrap my legs around his back. He’s hitting all the right spots, and he grunts against my lips.
“I’m coming, baby…” he says, almost like a warning, sliding his arms under my back and pressing me flush against him.
“Come with me, Damian,” I cry out as I cling to him, finally letting the tight knot unfurl into ropes of pleasure that spread through my body as he empties every drop of his cum deep inside me.
His thrusts buckle, and he doesn’t stop until he’s completely spent and drops his weight onto me. Damian doesn’t release me or pull his cock out, allowing us to ride the waves of pleasure together until our breaths steady.
He rolls onto his side and gathers me into a spooning position, pressing a kiss on my shoulder before he sighs.
“I almost forgot how good this feels,” he whispers behind me, and I instantly freeze.
Lying in his arms for what feels like an eternity after he must have fallen asleep, his arm feeling heavy across me, regret washes over me, overwhelming the heights of pleasure I just felt.
What did I just do?
Every thought comes flooding back into my mind, and it races now as that regret tightens in my chest.
I close my eyes, trying to stifle the tears that form, my heart hammering against the tightness. I have no idea what came over me, but I made a mistake.
A very big one.
Only because having sex with Damian again brought on the feelings I thought I’d forgotten a long time ago. Feelings that make the anger and hurt pale in comparison.
I gulp hard to swallow those emotions, because I know they’re wrong. Damian might have claimed me as his mate now, but it came ten years too late.
If he didn’t hesitate that night, if he didn’t start pulling away weeks before he became the alpha, I wouldn’t have left. I wouldn’t have allowed my insecurities to get to me, and I would have told him that I was pregnant with his child.
It was supposed to be a joyous occasion, but it turned into ten years of festering resentment that only became worse when he kidnapped me and forced me into the mate bond.
I wish things were different, but I can’t look past everything he’s done to me.
Like I meant nothing to him. Like all those whispers about Roxanne meant something, and I couldn’t trust the reassurance he used to give me.
Like our mate bond—which he claims is fated—meant nothing to him.
Like my life meant nothing when he used force to get me into the mate bond with him.
Maybe that’s why I can’t feel it myself.
Absentmindedly, my hand goes to my chest, and I clutch my mother’s pendant like a lifeline, and I’m able to ignore my inner wolf when she tries to reignite that heavy feeling in my chest that seems to gravitate toward Damian.
Whether the primal side of me wants him or not doesn’t matter. If I can’t get over Damian’s moment of weakness, which led to a decade of pain, then there is no future for us.
Not even after what happened tonight.
I can’t trust him, and that means I can’t trust him with our son. And that’s why my decision to leave Nightclaw with Daniel in the morning remains.
I’m tired of being apart from my son just so Damian doesn’t know the truth.