2. Shante
SHANTE
The ambulance doors slammed shut behind me. Everything after that felt like a blur. The sirens echoed through the streets while one of the paramedics kept wrapping that blood pressure cuff around my arm every few minutes.
“Try to relax.” The paramedic instructed.
Relax? How the hell was I supposed to relax after what just happened?
Kim had completely lost her damn mind. The second she walked through those doors carrying them big ass gift bags, something in my stomach dropped.
I knew she was about to start some shit.
But I never thought she’d do… that. “For me and Deuce’s twins.
” Were the words that kept replaying in my head.
Lord knows I wanted to beat her ass. I ain’t care about being pregnant and all the people standing around, I ain’t care about the decorations, the balloons, or that damn cake.
I wanted to snatch Kim up by that cheap ass lace front and drag her all over that banquet hall.
Just thinking about it made my head hurt.
If she’d kept her damn mouth shut, none of this would’ve happened.
Instead, I ended up laid out on that floor, praying that the babies were okay, and now it felt like my whole life was falling apart.
“You with me?” The paramedic’s voice pulled me back.
“Huh?” I asked.
“I asked if you’re having any pain.” He asked again.
“My head,” I swallowed. “And my stomach.”
“Scale from one to ten?” He asked.
“About a seven.” I replied.
He typed something into his tablet. “You’ve been under a lot of stress today?”
I looked over at Malik, he hadn’t taken his eyes off me since I passed out.
“You could say that.” I responded.
He rubbed both hands over his face. “Man… today has been one long ass nightmare.”
A few minutes later the ambulance backed into Beaumont’s emergency entrance.
The doors swung open and cool air rushed inside.
“One… two… three.” They rolled me out while nurses met us at the door.
Once we got inside the lights were so bright they bothered my eyes.
People were moving fast and questions were coming from every direction.
“Thirty weeks?” The nurse asked.
“Yes.” I answered.
“Twins?” She asked with a raised brow.
“Boy and girl.” Malik answered.
“Loss of consciousness?” She asked.
“Yes.” I answered with a slight attitude.
“Any bleeding?” The nurse asked.
“No.”
One nurse smiled at me. “We’re going to take good care of you.”
I nodded, I wanted to believe her but I wasn’t so sure. They rolled me into a room while another nurse hooked monitors to my stomach. A second later I heard a heartbeat and then another heartbeat, I closed my eyes, thank you, Jesus. I didn’t realize how scared I was until I heard both of them.
Malik reached over and grabbed my hand. “You hear that?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“They good.” He smiled.
“I know.”
He smiled down at my stomach. “My son and my little princess are already trying to give me gray hairs.”
I smiled. “They ain’t even here yet.”
“And they are already stressing me out.” He laughed.
I rolled my eyes. “You are so dramatic sometimes.”
“I am.” He laughed. “Our son will be hard headed just like his mama.”
“The hell he is.” I joked.
“He definitely is my daughter…” He looked down at my stomach with the biggest smile. “She already got me wrapped around her little finger. I ain’t even met her yet.”
“You don’t even know that.” I replied.
“I do.” He replied.
“How?” I asked.
“’Cause she's mine.”
I laughed and shook my head. “You're so crazy.”
“I’ve been called worse.” Malik laughed.
For a couple minutes it almost felt like none of that mess had happened. The doctor walked in carrying my chart. “I’m Dr. Patel.” He introduced himself before pulling up a stool. “I’ve looked over everything.”
I held my breath.
“The babies look good.” Dr. Patel let me know.
I finally exhaled.
“But…” He paused. “Your blood pressure is way too high.”
I hated hearing that because I knew they were going to keep me, I sighed. “I figured.”
“The amount of stress you’ve experienced today definitely didn’t help.” Dr. Patel let me know.
“No kidding.” I said sarcastically.
He smiled a little before turning serious again. “I’m admitting you for observation.”
My head turned toward him. “For how long?”
“I’d like to keep you overnight.” He answered.
“I can’t stay here.” I whined.
“You need to.” Dr. Patel let me know.
“I got stuff to do.” I whined.
“You’ve got two babies depending on you.” He said.
That shut me up. He looked over at Malik. “The biggest thing right now is keeping her calm.”
Malik laughed. “Good luck with that after today.”
Even the doctor smiled.
“I’ll do my best.” I mumbled.
After the doctor left, the room got quiet again. Malik pulled his chair closer. “You scared the hell outta me.”
I looked down. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologizing.” He rubbed my hand. “You ain’t pass out on purpose.”
I nodded. “I know.”
He leaned back in the chair for a second before letting out a long breath. “You know what still got me fucked up?”
I already knew where this was going. “The crazy ass chick that ruined my baby shower?” I asked.
“Who else?” He shook his head. “I still can’t believe she walked into that baby shower talking like that.”
Neither could I, I thought to myself.
“That woman is crazy as hell.” He laughed.
I forced a small laugh. “She is definitely different.”
“Different?” He looked at me. “Baby, that lady walked into a room full of people talking about your brother’s twins.” He shook his head again. “If your brother cheated on Alisha…” He paused. “…that’s fucked up.”
I felt the same way Deuce was cheating on my best friend and it wasn’t shit I could do about it. “I know.”
“I mean, damn.” He rubbed his beard.
“Everybody makes mistakes, but that?” He shook his head. “That ain’t the way to do somebody.”
I looked down at the blanket covering my legs. “Maybe she’s lying.”
“I hope she is.” Malik responded. “Cause if she ain’t…” He let the sentence die.
I picked at the edge of the hospital blanket. “Kim don’t seem… stable.”
“Nah, she don’t.” He folded his arms. “I just hate that Alisha got caught up in all that mess and Brittany.” Then he reached over and rested his hand gently against my belly. “My son and my little princess already got enough drama waiting on ’em.”
A tiny smile pulled at my lips. “You really be talking to them. They are probably tired of hearing your voice.”
He laughed. “They better get used to it.” His hand stayed right where it was. “I've been telling my son he gotta look out for his little sister. And my princess…” He smiled to himself. “She's already spoiled.”
“They ain’t even born yet.” I said while rolling my eyes.
“So they're still mine.”
The words cut deep because the truth was they weren’t his kids.
Watching him love these babies so freely made the guilt sit heavier on my heart more than it ever had before.
He already had plans for them. He couldn’t wait to buy matching gym shoes.
He wanted to take the baby girl on daddy daughter dates and promised he’d never let a little boy break her heart.
Every dream he shared, every smile and every little conversation he had with my stomach…
It reminded me of one thing, the babies weren’t his.
Everyday that passed he loved them more.
It felt like somebody was squeezing my heart.
I was actually letting this man believe I was carrying his babies.
I had exactly three months to continue to live this lie.
I hated myself for that more than anybody ever could.
“You good?” His voice pulled me back.
I blinked a couple times. “Yeah.”
“You sure?” He asked.
I smiled the best I could. “Yeah.”
He leaned over and kissed my forehead. “Ain’t nothing in this world more important than y’all.”
I closed my eyes the shit was so fucked up and at that point there was absolutely nothing I could do. It wasn’t like I could say Bae I got something to tell you these really ain’t yo kids they are Deuce’s and Kim’s. And that the crazy bitch really was bringing gifts for her and Deuce’s twins.
After the doctor left, the room got quiet again. Malik pulled his chair closer and he folded his arms. “I just hate that Alisha got caught up in all that bullshit.”
“So do I.” I responded.
“And Brittany.” Malik replied.
That made my stomach knot up.
“Kids don’t deserve grown folks’ problems.” Malik let me know.
“No, they don’t.” I agreed.
He looked over at my stomach, and his whole expression softened. Then he reached over and rested his hand gently against my belly. “You good?”
His voice pulled me back and I blinked a couple times. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
I smiled the best I could. “Yeah.”
The room got quiet again and Malik was still rubbing little circles across my stomach like the babies could actually feel him through the hospital blanket. Before I could let my mind wander too far, the hospital room door flew open so hard it smacked against the wall.
“There goes my grandbaby!” Grandma Lorraine came charging in carrying three grocery bags, her purse, a church fan, and somehow still had enough strength left to point her finger at me. “Now why the hell you got these people worrying me like this?”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Hi, Grandma.”
She stopped beside the bed and looked me up and down. “You look better.”
“I just got here.” I laughed.
“I know.” She nodded. “But you don’t look dead.”
Malik started laughing.
“Grandma…” I said.
“What?” I’m just being honest.” She kissed my forehead. “You scared me, baby.”
“I’m sorry.” I said.
“There you go apologizing.” She looked at Malik. “Tell her to quit saying sorry every five damn minutes.”
“I've been trying.” Malik responded.
“You ain’t trying hard enough.” Grandma turned back toward me. “You hungry?”
I blinked. “What?”
“I asked if you were hungry.” She repeated.
“Grandma, they just got me settled.”
“And?” She started digging through one of her bags. “I don’t trust hospital food.” She pulled out aluminum foil. “I brought fried chicken.”
I laughed. “Grandma…”
“What?” She asked.
“They ain’t said I could eat yet.” I let her know.
She froze. “Oh.” Then she looked at Malik. “Are you hungry?”
He looked inside the bag. “…You brought potato salad too?”
“I brought enough for everybody.” She pointed at him. “I know you ain’t been eating.”
“I eat.” Malik laughed.
“You nibble.” Grandma Lorraine laughed.
“No I don’t.” Malik mumbled.
“You're too skinny.”
I looked at Malik. “You finally found somebody that thinks you little.”
He pointed at Grandma. “She's the only one.”
Grandma rolled her eyes. “Boy, hush.”
She finally noticed all the monitors hooked up to me and her smile faded a little. “Are you feeling better?” She asked again.
“My head still hurts.” I let her know.
“I bet it does.”
She pulled her chair over and sat down with a long sigh. “Lord, our family can’t have one peaceful gathering.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” Malik said.
Grandma sucked her teeth. “That girl done lost her everlasting mind.”
I already knew who she was talking about. She waved her church fan. “That little heifer walked in there like she was accepting an award.”
I laughed. “Grandma…”
“I’m serious.” She stood up and started acting it out. “I brought gifts!” She held her imaginary bags up. “‘For me and Deuce’s twins.’” Grandma looked around the room dramatically. “Girl, I almost hit her with my shoe.”
Malik laughed so hard he leaned forward.
“You had your shoe off.” I asked.
“I surely did, I was ready.”
I shook my head. “You are something else.”
“I know.” She shrugged. “Then your Auntie Keisha…” Grandma started laughing. “That fool grabbed Kim by the arm and said, ‘Come on, Beyoncé.’”
I covered my face. “Oh my God.”
“And Kim hollering, ‘Don’t touch me!’” Grandma slapped her own leg. “Keisha said, ‘Baby, I’m trying not to.’”
I couldn’t stop laughing. For a few seconds the room didn’t feel so heavy. Then Grandma’s smile disappeared. “Oh I almost forgot.”
The way she said it made my stomach tighten. “What?”
She looked at me. “Don’t get yourself worked up.”
That was the worst thing she could’ve said. “What happened?”
She looked over at Malik. “You told her?”
He frowned. “Told her what?”
Grandma sighed. “Well there really ain’t no easy way to say it.”
I felt my heart start beating faster. “Grandma.”
She reached over and grabbed my hand. “Baby the FBI came.”
I frowned. “To the baby shower?”
She nodded. “And they arrested Deuce.”
For a second I thought I heard her wrong. “…What?”
“They put handcuffs on him right there.”
I sat straight up. “No.”
“They did.” Grandma said matter of factly.
“No.” My voice came out louder than I meant it to. “They couldn’t have.”
Grandma looked surprised by my reaction. “Baby they sure did.”
I felt my chest getting tight. That wasn’t supposed to happen. None of this was supposed to happen. The whole reason I agreed to carry these babies was so that Deuce’s ass would stay out of jail. Lying ass, I should’ve known better. I looked down at my stomach. All of this for what?
Malik reached for my hand. “Baby you alright?”
I blinked fast. “Yeah.”
“You don’t look alright.” He replied.
I forced myself to breathe.
“I just…” I swallowed. “I hate hearing my brother got locked up.”
“I know.” He squeezed my hand. “But if he is innocent he’ll come home.”
The guilt damn near choked me because innocent wasn’t the word I’d use.
Grandma shook her head. “I told that boy years ago leave them fast girls and them fast streets alone.’” She looked toward the ceiling. “Did he listen? No, he is hard headed just like his daddy.”
I couldn’t even laugh this time. All I could think about was Deuce, that crazy ass nigga thought this would fix everything. Instead Kim blew up the baby shower and he was sitting in jail and I was laid up in a hospital bed trying to keep my blood pressure down. Some family, some damn plan.