Chapter 14
LAWSON
I’m pretty sure I’m going to throw up.
I stand alone in the hallway outside the storage room, staring at the back door through which Victor King disappeared.
I need to tell someone what just happened. I need to tell Mac. But the thought makes fresh panic race through my veins. How the hell can I admit this to him?
Victor King knows about me and Nova. Just like Nick suggested after poker, which I’d been too much of a coward to really consider. He knows about me and Nova and he’s trying to use our relationship to extort me and my brothers.
I tried to diffuse it. Tried to tell King that he didn’t know what he was talking about, that Nova and I had merely fucked a few times.
My stomach was sour even saying those words, trying to convince him that she meant nothing to me, but I knew I had to do it.
It was the only chance I could think of to protect the bar and my brothers. To protect her.
I rub my hands over my face, wishing I could break something.
He didn’t buy it. I could see it in his eyes, the steely way he looked at me.
I don’t know the man well—back in the day he’d only really dealt with Mac—but I know enough to understand that he isn’t to be underestimated.
The asshole is smart and perceptive and he uses what information he can glean about people against them.
He’s going to try to use Nova against me. He hadn’t believed that she didn’t mean anything to me and I have no idea what I’m supposed to do now.
Tell Mac, a voice in my head demands. You have to tell him now, before King does something.
Fear finally gets my feet moving and I practically sprint down the hall to the bar. I breathe a sigh of relief when I see my family, all gathered around a table, eating and laughing. The band is about to go back on stage after their break. I should get Mac before they start and—
“Lawson?” Jessa, one of our waitresses says, taping my arm. “Someone dropped off your phone for you.”
I take the familiar blue case from her, my brain stumbling a little over her words. Where had I left my phone? Did I have it when I came to work?
“Who?” I ask.
She shrugs. “Didn’t leave a name. Pretty girl, long wavy hair, kind of a hippie sundress. Lots of bracelets.” Before I can ask any more questions, Cam is shouting that her order is ready and she’s scurrying back behind the bar to pick it up.
My stomach churns. Nova was here? I guess it makes sense—I’d been distracted leaving her place earlier, and I don’t remember using my phone in the car on the way over. I must have left it there.
So she brought it back to me? And didn’t ask to see me?
My eyes go back to the table filled with my family. I guess maybe she wouldn’t have, if she knew I was at work. Did she think I wouldn’t want to see her? That I would be upset if someone I knew saw us together?
Of course she fucking thought that, you asshole. Why wouldn’t she? I’ve been hiding her all summer.
And it still hadn’t done me any good. Her fucking uncle still found out about us and—
“Hey man.” Sawyer is suddenly standing in front of me, smirking in that familiar way. “You’re never going to believe who I saw tonight.”
I raise my eyebrows, too overwhelmed by the clusterfuck of the last half hour to put up with his shit. His smirk grows.
“You remember that chick from the county fair a few months ago? Real pretty little thing with long brown hair and an amazing rack?”
It takes everything in me not to punch his stupid face—but he’s still not done talking. “She said you were at her tattoo parlor today and left your phone.”
My heart throbs at that. She’d lied to my brother because she knew he recognized her.
I did that. I made her feel like lying and hiding was necessary. I am such an asshole.
“Funny,” he continues, eyes wide with mock innocence. “I didn’t realize you had any ink done today. Don’t be shy—show it to me.”
“Fuck off, Sawyer.” I start to push past him. I can’t be distracted by his shit right now, I have to talk to Mac and—
“Come on, man,” he complains, grabbing my shoulder to stop me from walking away. “You can’t leave me hanging.” He does that annoying eyebrow thing that he thinks makes him look charming. “How was your little rendezvous in the office? Desk still standing?”
Something cold slithers into my belly, but I’m not sure why. “The office?”
Sawyer winks. “Yeah, man. I’m the one who sent her to you.” He puts a hand to his ear. “I don’t hear a thank you.”
His words are setting off alarm bells in my head. “You sent her to the office?” I ask slowly, trying to figure out why this conversation has fresh dread settling in my gut. “When was this?”
He shrugs. “Fifteen minutes ago? I saw her out in the staff lot and let her in through the back door. She said she had your phone so I sent her to the office.” He shakes his head.
“Then the fucking kitchen sink started leaking again so I had to jet before the kitchen flooded. Did you hear about that? Third damn time this week.”
I tune him out, not giving a shit about the kitchen. Nova wasn’t just here—she’d been in the back hallway. Alone. Fifteen minutes ago—right around the time Victor King cornered me in the storeroom.
“Fuck,” I whisper, panic rising. “Fuck.”
Sawyer finally seems to realize that I’m not listening to his blathering. “Law? You okay?”
“No, I’m not fucking okay,” I mutter, rubbing at my chest, which is starting to feel really damn tight. What if the reason Nova got out of here so quickly wasn’t because she didn’t want my brothers to see her? What if she’d taken off because she saw me with her uncle? Fuck, what if she’d heard us?
“No,” I gasp, the terrible things I’d said running through my head. “No fucking way.” If Nova had been in that hallway, if she’d heard me…
She doesn’t mean shit to me, man.
I’m going to throw up.
“Lawson.” Sawyer’s voice is loud now, worried. “You look like you’re about to pass out. What the hell is wrong?”
“I have to go,” I mutter, patting my pockets for my keys. I need to get to Nova. I need to find out what she heard. I need to fucking explain.
But I need to talk to Mac, too. I need to warn him, explain about King. I need…fuck, I can’t be in two places at once and I don’t know what the hell to do.
My brother or Nova? The bar, or the woman I love?
I glance down at my phone, the phone she’d been nice enough to bring here. Even knowing that she might not get a welcome reception, since her asshole boyfriend had been pretty clear about keeping her separate from the rest of his life.
Her boyfriend. Did she even think of me that way? Or was I really just a short-term hook-up for her?
No. I know that’s not how she sees me. I can tell every time I’m with her, the way she looks at me. The way she touches me. I mean more to her—we mean more to her. I fucking feel it.
“I have to go,” I tell Sawyer, the decision made for me. I’ll talk to Mac later. I’ll explain everything that happened tonight with King, fuck, everything that’s been happening all summer. He might be pissed that I’d gotten involved with her, but I can’t make myself care right now.
All I can think about is what it would have felt like for Nova if she’d overheard me saying those things. God, I’d told him that we just fucked a few times, that she didn’t mean shit to me. Is my girl out there right now, alone and hurting? Because of me? I can’t stand the thought.
“Hey,” Sawyer calls and I realize that I’m already half way to the door. “You can’t leave, man! We’re slammed!”
I feel a brief moment of hesitation. I’m not the guy who walks out on the bar when someone needs me.
Over the years, I’ve clocked more hours than anyone in this place.
Everyone always jokes about how I’m a workaholic with no life—or at least, they used to, before I started spending all my free time with Nova.
The truth is, I always felt like I owed it to my brothers to be at their beck and call. Especially Mac. After everything he did for me, everything he sacrificed, I owed it to him to make this place run smoothly. I owed all of them.
I’d always assumed there couldn’t be anything that I cared about more than my siblings and this bar. But standing here, trapped between my responsibilities to my brothers and the woman I love, I realize there’s no choice.
Nova might be hurting, and that means there’s only one place I’m supposed to be. So without answering Sawyer, I leave the Low Bar and go to find my girl.