20. Damned Dragon
CHAPTER 20
Damned Dragon
Hawke Stormblood
“I will leave you two for a short time, but do not take liberties with my ward, princeling.”
I shove down the urge to yell at him and instead bow my head respectfully. The words grate against my restraint, but I hold my tongue. I want to be alone with her, to let my guard down, and yes, I certainly want to take liberties. He’s well within his right to warn me off, and that stings more than it should.
Kellan walks past me, opens the door, and steps out, closing it softly behind him. The silence he leaves behind is deafening and heavy at the same time.
I cross the room to where Melinda is sitting on the bed, wrapped in a towel and a thin blanket. My breath hitches at the sight of her creamy-colored legs exposed, the smooth expanse of skin calling to me. I want to touch them, taste them. My gaze travels all the way down to her painted pink toes, each detail etching itself into my memory.
Why isn’t she dressed? I scan the room and see no clothes. No food, either. A wave of anger and protectiveness surges through me. “He’s not taking care of you. Have you eaten today?”
She nods. “He is taking care of me. I ate this morning in the market before everything happened.”
“Why has no one brought you a meal? You must be starving. It’s the middle of the afternoon.”
“Her dinner is in the next room, princeling,” Kellan bellows from the hallway then goes back to arguing softly with the maids. It sounds like they’re arguing on my behalf to have more time with her. I don’t know why they’re on my side but I appreciate it.
She smiles at Kellan’s outburst. Not a half smile. A whole giant smile. A grin so wide it stops my heart for a beat or two. I’m so jealous. I want her smiles and laughter for myself. I want to be the one caring for her. She belongs to me.
Every fiber of my being aches to pull her into my arms, to shield her from all harm. The fear of losing her, the fear that she might choose someone else, gnaws at me.
“Nimue interrupted. Hawke, she said… you… that you would die without me. Is it true?” Her voice trembles slightly, a mixture of confusion and fear evident in her eyes. “And what of the arranged marriage?”
My heart clenches, the need to comfort her overwhelming me. I sink to the floor, to one knee, and look up at her, my gaze unwavering. “Yes and no. It’s complicated. But I want to spend every single moment in your presence, Melinda. And when I am not, my soul longs for you. Do not give Vencia a moment of worry. I will end that expectation the moment I am king.”
She nods and I’m grateful she believes me.
“How did I end up with a piece of your soul inside me? How do I give it back to you?” Her voice wavers, and I can see the turmoil in her eyes, the weight of Nimue's revelation pressing down on her. Nimue should have let me tell her when I was ready. She shouldn’t have put this pressure on her.
I take a deep breath, my chest tightening. “I don’t know how you got it. But it’s beautiful and it tells me you’re mine.”
Her eyes widen, a mix of awe and uncertainty. “You can see it?”
I nod, my voice soft but firm. “Yes, I can. And it tells me that we are meant to be bound together in a way that transcends understanding. You’re my soul mate, Melinda. I am incomplete without you.”
“How? How do I give it back to you? How do I keep the darkness away?” Her questions are laced with desperation, and I can feel her fear, her need for answers.
I move closer, my hand trembling. I gently touch the part of her chest where I can sense my soul shard glowing, right above her heart. I feel it again. The surge of energy. The draw to the chaotic magick alive inside her. “You don’t need to give it back, Melinda. Together, the darkness is held at bay.”
The feral nature within me claws at the surface, the urge to claim her, to mark her as mine, nearly overwhelming. But I hold back, forcing myself to stay in control. I’m not ready to tell her everything. Not yet. “We’ll figure this out together. You’re not alone in this. I’ll protect you, always.”
She whimpers softly, and my desire for her intensifies, but I keep my focus on her eyes, grounding myself in the connection we share. Her scent, sweet and feminine, fills my senses, making it harder to resist the pull, but I stay steady, my resolve unyielding.
“Why now?” Her voice is calm, almost too calm, and it catches me off guard. The question hangs in the air, heavy with uncertainty.
“I don’t know why now,” I reply, my voice thick with emotion. “Except that if it had not happened yesterday, I would’ve been gone. I wouldn’t have been in the castle again for several years.” The thought of not being here, of missing her entirely, sends a chill down my spine. I can’t bear the idea of a life where our paths never crossed.
I watch her closely, searching her face for any sign of panic or distress. But she remains eerily calm, her expression unreadable. The stillness unsettles me, makes my heart race with worry.
“I’m so grateful you’re here,” I continue, my voice softening. “I know you went through hell to get to me, and for that, I am so sorry.” The words fall short, unable to fully convey the depth of my gratitude and the understanding of the pain I know she endured.
Suddenly, her calm facade cracks. Tears well up in her eyes, and she starts to cry, the sound breaking through the silence like a wave crashing against the shore. The sight of her tears twists something deep inside me, a mix of anguish and fierce protectiveness surging through my veins.
I move my hand from her chest up to gently cup her face. “Melinda,” I whisper, my voice breaking. “I can’t imagine the strength it took for you to find me. The thought of you suffering, of you being alone… it tears me apart.”
Her sobs grow louder, and I pull her off the bed into my arms, holding her as tightly as I dare. The feral part of me wants to rage against the world for the pain she’s endured, but I force myself to remain calm. She doesn’t need that darkness right now.
As I hold her, a sense of completeness washes over me. The piece of my soul that resides within her resonates, sending a comforting warmth through my chest. It’s like a puzzle piece clicking into place. The bond between is begging for more. The connection is overwhelming, and my heart swells with a mix of love and protectiveness.
“I’m here now,” I murmur into her hair and tuck the blanket tighter around her trembling body. “Shhhh. Melinda.” I stroke her head, gently moving her hair from her reddened face. The touch is tender, meant to soothe, and she starts to relax in my arms. I rearrange and sit fully on the ground, leaning against the bedpost, and pull her into my lap, wrapping the blanket around her more securely.
As she continues to cry, I tighten my hold, pressing her closer to my chest. “I’ve got you,” I whisper, my voice gentle yet firm. “I won’t let anything hurt you. You’re safe with me.”
Her sobs gradually subside, and I continue to hold her, soothed by the steady rhythm of her breathing as it syncs with mine. In this moment, nothing else matters. Not the council, not the threats that loom over us. Just her, in my arms, and the connection that’s binding us tighter and tighter together with every passing second.
The bedroom door opens and Kellan’s head appears.
Damned dragon.
His face darkens for a moment, wordlessly threatening bodily harm if I behave inappropriately. I instinctively recognize the fatherly warning and nod, assuring him I’ll be respectful.
As possible. I squeeze Melinda tighter to my chest and breath in her sweet citrusy scent. The calming fragrance washes over me, soothing the chaos in my mind. This is where I belong. This is where she belongs.
Kellan retreats, closing the door again, leaving us alone.
I go back to gently petting her hair. The softness of her hair against my fingers, the warmth of her body pressed close to mine, all of it grounds me.
She snuggles her face against my shirt and breathes deeply. “It’s such a mess.”
“What is, Melinda? What’s a mess?”`
“Everything.” She sniffles and hiccups through another few sobs. “I can’t save you like Nimue says. I’m cursed. You can’t be with me. You should be with that other woman.”
My lip curls and my fangs descend slightly, vehemently opposed to even thinking that Vencia is a possibility. “Never. I don’t want her. I want you. You’re mine, Melinda. That’s what I’ve been saying. Haven’t you heard me?”
“But I’ll kill you. My magick will kill you. We can’t be together.” Her voice trembles, and the fear in her eyes is a knife to my heart.
“I’m holding you right now, and I feel quite fine.” I tighten my grip on her, wanting to shield her from all her fears. “Why do you think you’re cursed?”
“Everyone on Earth with magick is…” Her voice falters.
“Is what?” My heart races faster, anxiety creeping in. What if things have really changed? What if shutting the door to Earth really did damage the magick? “Magick wasn’t dangerous when we lived there. There was no curse.”
She wipes the tears from her eyes and looks up at me, her gaze searching mine. “You lived on Earth?”
I nod, trying to convey reassurance through my eyes. “Yes, I did.”
“How old are you?” Her curiosity momentarily eclipses her fear, and it brings a small, bittersweet smile to my lips.
I grin just slightly. “Quite older than you, I would imagine.” I chuckle softly, hoping to lighten the mood. “Fae age very differently than humans. We live a very, very long time.”
“But I’m not human, either.” Her voice is filled with a mix of revelation and confusion. “Kellan proved that with Calix. With the goats. With Ares. My mother was Fae, and she aged normally. At least she looked like she was. She did always look young for her age.”
“Fae grow and mature and we mostly stay looking like I do for quite a long time before we start showing signs of aging.” I keep my voice gentle, hoping to soothe her while she processes this new information.
Melinda burrows into my shirt, her breaths slowing with each inhale. “We have to have sex to bond, don’t we? That’s how it works in all the fantasy romance books.”
“What? What books?”
“Fantasy stories. Romances.” She murmurs into my clothes. “You smell so nice.” Her breathing deepens, and she drifts off, leaving me with so many burning questions.
I lean my head back against the bedpost and close my eyes, a mix of emotions swirling within me. Sleep sounds like the right choice. I didn’t get any last night, and I can’t even begin to imagine how tired she is. But more than that, I am honored that she felt safe enough to sleep in my arms. The warmth of her body against mine is a soothing balm to my frayed nerves, and for once in a long time, my soul is at peace.
The noise of the door closing wakes me. Melinda’s warm weight is still nestled in my arms. The room is bathed in the soft glow of candlelight, and the scent of savory food fills the air. Glancing to the side, I notice a tray laden with cups of wine and a large plate with a variety of meats, cheeses, and some fresh bread on the floor next to me. One of the maids must have just brought it in while we slept. Probably what woke me.
A glance at the window tells me we slept for hours, not minutes. The sky outside is dark. I’m surprised no one’s come looking for me, but my brother and the other knights have probably taken it upon themselves to make sure no one knows where I am. Still, it’s been hours. I should leave her for the night. Even good servants talk sometimes.
Melinda stirs, her eyes fluttering open. She looks up at me, a mix of emotions playing across her face - comfort, uncertainty, and a hint of something deeper, more profound.
"Hey," I whisper, brushing a stray lock of hair from her forehead. "They brought us food. Hungry?"
She nods, sitting up slightly but making no move to leave the circle of my arms. I reach over and pull the tray closer, the aroma making my stomach growl.
She starts to unfold the blanket to get an arm free.
"Let me," I say softly, picking up a morsel of tender meat and holding it to her lips.
Melinda hesitates for a moment before accepting the offering, her eyes never leaving mine. She takes the bite, chews, and swallows. We continue like this, me feeding her bit by bit, the intimacy of the moment wrapping around us like a cocoon.
"Tell me about how you got here," I prompt gently.
She takes a deep breath, her gaze turning inward.
A slight wave of nauseating magick rolls through my body, but it stops quickly as she gets control again.
"My mother... she was executed. She took the blame for me losing control and hurting people. I don’t know how she convinced them it wasn’t me. But my father–my stepfather–hid me away after that. After the Inquisitors burned her at the stake."
“Burned her–” My heart clenches at the pain in her voice. I tighten my hold on her, offering silent comfort as she continues. “By fate, Melinda. I’m so sorry.”
“It was terrible. I killed more people that day.” A sob slips out.
I can’t imagine the depth of pain she experienced watching her mother burned to death. The idea of that happening to my mother would… I’d kill people too.
"My stepfather and I, and some close family friends… we went searching for Avalon. My mother spent her whole life trying to find a way here. She knew it was real. A place where magick wasn’t considered evil. We found a map in her journals after she died. The one Nimue claims to have planted. That map led us to a cave, and the door..."
Melinda's voice hitches, tears welling in her eyes. "But the Inquisitors found us. They killed everyone - my stepfather, our friends. I couldn't control my magick. I couldn't save them. But I did avenge them."
I press a soft kiss to her temple, my own eyes stinging with sympathy. Taking life is hard. Even if it was a righteous kill, it will live with her forever. "It wasn't your fault, Melinda. You did everything you could. And they would’ve killed you too, right?"
“Yes. They would’ve.”
“You were defending yourself. You survived.”
She nods her head, burying her face in my chest. "It was the first time I used my magick on purpose like that. The first time I didn’t try to hold it back. Nimue found me after they were all dead. She brought me to the dragon world first, to Kellan. And then here, to Avalon. To you."
I don’t trust Nimue. Even though I know her goal is to get the High Council to open the Earth door, she’s working with the rebellion. And the rebellion’s ultimate goal is to free the queen–the reason we had to abandon Earth in the first place, the reason the Fae lost everything.
I cup Melinda’s chin, tilting her face up to meet my gaze. "I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. But I promise you, you're safe now. We'll figure this out together."
She looks up and searches my eyes, a flicker of hope amidst the sorrow. "You really believe that? Even with my magick?"
"Especially with your magick," I affirm, my thumb tracing the delicate line of her jaw. "It's a part of you, just like my soul shard. We're meant to be together, Melinda. I feel it with every fiber of my being."
She leans into my touch, her eyes drifting shut. "I want to believe that. I want it so badly it hurts."
"Then believe it," I whisper, my lips a hairsbreadth from hers. "Believe in us." I close the remaining distance, sealing my vow with a tender kiss on her lips.
“Kellan will be mad,” she says softly against my lips.
“Will you?”
The tiniest of head shakes. “No.” She turns in my lap and puts her arms around my neck. “Not at all.”
Our lips meet again, this time with a fervor that threatens to consume us both. Her fingers tangle in my hair, pulling me closer as if she can't bear even the slightest space between us. I respond in kind, my hands sliding up her back, tracing the delicate curve of her spine through the thin fabric of the towel. The blanket has fallen away.
The kiss deepens, a dance of tongues and shared breaths, a communion of souls. In this moment, nothing else exists - not the looming threats, not the uncertainties of our future. There is only Melinda, the taste of her, the feel of her in my arms.
Her lips against mine send a wave of warmth through me, melting away my fears. Every sensation is heightened, igniting a primal hunger within. My heart pounds in sync with hers, echoing the depth of our connection.
The warmth of her body against mine is a soothing balm, grounding me in the present. My senses are filled with her: the scent of her hair, the feel of her skin, the sound of her breaths mingling with mine. It's as if my entire being is attuned to her, every nerve ending alive with the electric thrill of our closeness.
As our tongues dance together, a sense of peace and rightness envelops me. This is where I belong, where we both belong. The feral part of me, usually straining at the leash, is calm and content in this moment, soothed by her presence. The piece of my soul within her glows brightly, a beacon of our shared destiny, reinforcing the truth that we are meant to be together.
She straddles my lap, her heat seeping into me, igniting a primal need. I groan as she rocks against my growing arousal—a sweet torture promising more. Desire courses through me, barely contained.
My hands roam her body, mapping every curve and hollow with reverent awe. Each touch is a discovery, a sacred journey across her skin. I commit every sigh and shiver to memory, savoring the way her body responds to mine. She is a revelation, a balm to my battered soul, and I drink her in like a man starved, desperate to memorize every sensation.
Her skin is soft under my fingertips, smooth and inviting. I trace the delicate line of her spine. She arches into me, her breaths coming faster. Her warmth surrounds me, grounding me in the moment, making everything else fade into insignificance. The scent of her fills my senses, a mix of sweetness and something uniquely her, something intoxicating.
"Hawke," she breathes, my name a prayer on her lips. The sound sends a shiver down my spine, electrifying every nerve. Her eyes flutter open, dark with desire and something infinitely more profound. There's a depth there, a connection that goes beyond physical attraction. It's soul-deep, a recognition of our shared destiny.
"I've never felt like this before," she whispers, her voice trembling with emotion. "Like I'm finally where I'm meant to be."
I cup her face in my hands again, my thumbs brushing away the tears that spill down her cheeks. Her skin is warm and soft beneath my touch, and a fierce protectiveness wells up inside me. "You are my everything, Melinda. My heart, my soul, my reason for being. I will love you and protect you until my last breath."
For a moment, her eyes shine with a radiant joy, and I think we might be able to hold onto this happiness. But her expression shifts. The joy on her face fades to sorrow, and it steals the air from my lungs. A shadow falls over her features, and I see the weight of her fears return.
“It still doesn’t change the curse. Loving me… being with me will kill you.” Her voice is a broken whisper, and the despair in her words cuts through me like a sharp blade.
She tries to climb off my lap, her movements frantic and desperate, but I tighten my arms around her, trapping her close. “It won’t. Whatever this curse is… you’re in Avalon now. Not on Earth.”
More tears pour down her cheeks, each one a testament to the pain and fear she’s carried for so long. “My magick still hurts people. Nothing has changed. On Earth, when a woman with magick has a baby, the cost is the life of the father. Sometimes even more than just his. We’re taught never to have children with men we love because they’ll die. Every magickal birth has a deadly cost. It’s a curse.”
I stare at her, shock and disbelief warring within me as the pieces fall into place - her fear, her desperate attempts to push me away. But I refuse to let centuries of Earth superstition destroy us before we have a chance to begin.
I stay quiet and she keeps going.
“My biological father died the second I drew breath, breaking my mother’s heart. She’d broken our rule. She’d fallen in love and let him get her pregnant with me.”
I don’t know how to combat this fear that has been ingrained in her, but I can’t bear to see her so broken. “I don't know what to say. But it can’t be true.”
“It is. It’s been the way forever. We have books detailing it. Couples who’ve tried to find ways around the curse. Nothing works. No matter how far they went, the man always died the moment the baby breathed its first breath.” Her voice is thick with sorrow, each word laden with the weight of generations of suffering.
I pull her closer, my heart aching for the pain she's endured, for the weight of this curse that's haunted her for so long. Her body trembles against mine, and I wish I could absorb her pain, take it all away. "Melinda, listen to me. We are not on Earth anymore. The rules, the laws of magick, they're different here in Avalon."
She shakes her head, her eyes clouded with a lifetime of fear and sorrow. "You can’t be sure."
I brush my lips against her forehead, a gentle, reassuring touch. "I have faith in us, in the bond growing between us. Your magick, my soul shard, they're connected in ways we're only beginning to understand."
"But what if it's not enough?" Her voice is a broken whisper, a plea for certainty in a world that's offered her none.
"Then we'll find another way," I vow, my voice fierce with conviction. "We have resources here, knowledge that's been lost on Earth for centuries."
She meets my gaze, uncertainty clouding her eyes. "You really believe we can find an answer hidden away in Avalon's ancient texts?"
"I do," I said, infusing the words with all the conviction thrumming through me. "I will tear the realm apart if I have to. I won't lose you to this. Or us." I brush a featherlight kiss across her trembling lips, sealing the vow.
She leans into my touch, a shaky sigh escaping her lips. "I want to believe there’s a way. I want to be with you. Nothing feels more right, but I won’t sacrifice another person I care for to my cursed magick."
I trace the delicate line of her jaw with my thumb, marveling at her strength and resilience. “We are meant to be, Melinda. Fate would not have sent you here to me after all these centuries only to snatch you away again.”
"I’m scared of hurting you."
"I’m not afraid," I tell her, sealing my words with a soft, lingering kiss. The contact is electric. "I need you to be brave, Melinda. I need you to believe I can fix this."
I will try.” Her voice is barely a whisper, but there’s a newfound determination in her eyes.