EMBER
The apartment falls silent the second the front door closes behind Emmett and Sully.
Cassidy looks at me. "Couch?"
"Couch." I nod.
We grab the blankets and collapse onto opposite ends of the sofa.
Cassidy grabs the remote while I disappear into the kitchen, returning with two spoons and the tub of chocolate ice cream Jo had pointed out last night.
She presses play on the first romance movie Netflix throws at us.
Five minutes in, the hero declares his undying love.
Cassidy throws a cushion at the television. "Bullshit."
I can't help but laugh. "They're fictional."
"So were our husbands, apparently," she mumbles.
Silence settles between us again. The movie keeps playing, but neither of us is really watching it.
My phone buzzes.
I ignore it.
A few seconds later, Cassidy's buzzes too.
Then mine again.
Then hers.
She reaches for her phone first.
"He's persistent."
"What does he want?"
She unlocks it and sighs. "'Please talk to me.'"
Another message comes through. "'I never wanted to hurt you.'"
She snorts. "Bit late for that."
My own phone lights up.
Kevin.
I stare at it for a long moment before opening it.
Kevin: Please, Em. We need to talk.
Another one.
Kevin: I know how this looks.
I laugh. Actually laugh.
"What's funny?" Cassidy asks.
"He said he knows how it looks, us catching them together, but indicating it’s not what we think. Who the hell is he gaslighting?”
"I was worried that we'd imagined the naked blanket part."
I take my phone, turn it over, and place it on the coffee table. "I don't know what we're supposed to do," I tell her.
"Me either."
"Do people just ..." I wave my hand around, "... get divorced?"
“Shit, are we getting divorced?” she asks.
“Um …” My brows pull together. “I … well …”
“I mean, I’m not staying with that lying, cheating asshole, but I didn’t know about you,” Cassidy states.
I shake my head. “Honestly, I hadn’t thought that far ahead, but maybe we should.”
"We probably need a lawyer," she adds. I nod. "And what about the business?"
I look at her. “The business …”
"We can't exactly keep flipping houses together," she tells me.
She’s right. “How did this get so messy?”
“It got messy because of them,” she says.
And she’s not wrong as my mind wanders to the staff in the office, the projects, and the money tied up in said projects. Everything we'd spent years building together.
"I don't even know where to start."
"I don't either. It’s all a little overwhelming.”
We sit with that for a while in silence, contemplating everything as the movie ends.
"I don't know if I want to go home." Her voice is barely above a whisper.
"I mean, eventually we'll have to," I say.
"But I don't want to. There’s nothing left there, our old lives don’t exist anymore.”
My phone buzzes again.
Kevin.
Cassidy's lights up at exactly the same time.
Trevor.
She looks at me.
"We should probably tell them something," I tell her.
"I don't want to talk to him," she tells me.
"I'm not talking to him either, but I want the damn calls and texts to stop so I can think.”
She reaches for her phone. "I'm just sick of this." She types, stops, then deletes it. "What do we even say?"
I pick up my phone. "How about ..." I think for a moment. "We need time." She nods as she starts typing. "We'll contact you next week. Please stop calling."
We both type the same message, then I hit send.
"So ..." Cassidy says. "We're really doing this."
"I guess we are."
The apartment is quiet again, and for the first time since yesterday neither phone rings or dings, and it’s heaven.
“Never thought I would ever be getting a divorce, but here we are,” Cassidy says sadly.
“Me too.”
“But I can’t stay, not knowing …”
I nod. “I agree.”
“What are we going to do?” she asks, and I can hear the panic in her voice.
“We have a week to figure it out. I want us to go back to them with a plan because, at the moment, the two of them have the upper hand and we need to recoup and work our shit out.”
“What about the business?”
I still. Shit, the office is probably wondering what is happening.
“I’ll text Lydia that we had a family emergency, and we will be out of action for the next week. That should give us time.” I grab my phone again and message our assistant.
“I don’t want to lose our business, but I don’t know how we are going to run it with those two,” Cassidy states.
“I don’t know either, but we don’t have to figure it out today. Ready for another movie?”
She nods, and I click on another as we curl up on the sofa again.
A key turns in the front door, and Jo walks in carrying what looks like half a department store.
"What on earth? You’ve been shopping up a storm," Cassidy says as she sits up on the sofa.
Jo smiles as she drops the bags onto the kitchen island. "They're for you two."
Cassidy and I exchange a look.
"What?"
"You left with only gym bags yesterday," she says as she starts pulling things out one by one. Underwear, bras, pajamas, leggings, T-shirts, and toiletries.
My throat tightens. "Jo ..."
She shrugs. "You needed them."
I can’t believe she went and did that for us. "We'll pay you back."
She waves me away. “We’re family, it’s what we do.”
I get up, rush over, and hug her because Jo is literally an angel. “Thank you.” I start to cry.
“Hey, now, it’s just a couple of things to get you two back on your feet.”
“It’s so kind of you.”
“It’s nothing really. Also, Collette is coming over with take-out, Thai, I think she’s ordered, and we’re going to have a girls’ night in,” Jo tells me. “Go freshen up and we can drink champagne and shit talk men.” She smiles as she hands me a bag load of clothes.
I take the clothes with Cassidy, and we both go and freshen up. By the time we are dressed in new clothes that fit perfectly, Collette is in the living room, the coffee table is filled with goodies, and a bottle of champagne is being popped.
“Hey,” Collette says, looking up and seeing us here. “I got you two something.” She rushes into the kitchen and brings out two bunches of flowers. “I thought it might cheer you up.” She smiles.
“Thank you,” I tell her as my eyes get wet again.
“Come on, let’s dig in, I’m starving,” Jo says.
We place the flowers back onto the kitchen counter and join the ladies in the living room. It’s been cleaned up of our mess from today, and fresh blankets have been laid out. It’s the little things I’m starting to notice.
Jo pours us each a glass of champagne. “Now, I’m not sure what we should be cheering to, but we just want you two beautiful women to know that this isn’t your fault, that you didn’t deserve what happened to you, and that life will one day feel better even though right now it is shit.”
We cheers to her kind words, and I throw back the bubbles before we start hooking into the food. Moments later, as if their noses led them here, Emmett and Sully appear in the doorway.
“Something smells good,” Emmett says, rubbing his belly. He comes over and kisses Jo on the temple.
“I’m starved,” Sully adds.
“No,” Collette tells them. “This is girls’ night. You can go to my place where I’ve left your food.” The boys seem surprised. “I got Thai for you guys, too. Now shoo, before Justin eats it all,” she tells them.
“Well then, guess we are off to Fish’s,” the boys say as they walk back out the front door and down the corridor to Collette and Justin’s apartment.
"Finally," Collette mutters. "Now we can actually talk."
Jo tops up everyone's champagne.
"We are your mental health helpers tonight,” Collette explains.
Cassidy and I look at her, confused.
“What she’s saying is, you guys probably are overwhelmed with everything, but now is the time to be smart. We learned this the hard way with Pierre after he ran out on Kitty at their wedding.”
That’s right, I remember hearing about that.
“He wasn’t in the best headspace to deal with the fallout, and we were there for him. We want to do the same with you guys,” Collette adds as she curls her legs underneath herself. "So ..." She looks between us. "How are you really doing?"
The question hangs there.
I stare down into my champagne glass. "I feel ..." The words refuse to come, "... empty." Nobody interrupts. "I keep thinking yesterday wasn't real." Cassidy nods beside me. "Like I’m expecting to wake up at any moment."
Jo reaches over and squeezes my knee. "I know."
"I don't think you do." The words come out sharper than I mean them to. Immediately, guilt crashes into me. "I'm sorry."
Jo shakes her head. "You don't have to apologize."
"No ..." I rub my forehead. "I just ..." I finally look up. "Our whole future disappeared in about thirty seconds yesterday." Silence fills the space. "I don't know who I am without him." The confession feels ugly and embarrassing as tears fall across my cheeks.
Collette is the first to answer. "You're still Ember."
I blink as I try to wipe the tears away.
"You've always been Ember."
"Except I haven't." I laugh without humor. "I've been Kevin's wife or partner since high school. High school!”
“Our whole entire adult life has been with them,” Cassidy adds. “Every major moment has been with them.”
Collette and Jo nod as if they understand, but I don’t think they can grasp how long we have been with these two.
“Okay then, what do Ember Black and Cassidy Sullivan want from life?”
Her using our maiden names throws me for a loop as it’s been so long since I’ve been Ember Black.
“Firstly, I can’t remember the last time someone called me Cassidy Sullivan, and secondly, I want to be called Cassidy Sullivan again.” Cass smiles.
“There you go, one decision made.” Jo smiles as she turns to me. “Do you want to be Ember Black again?”
I nod slowly. “I think I do. Ember Black never got to grow into being someone, she’s been Ember Henderson for so long.”
“It’s the same with Cassidy Burke, she needs a funeral,” she explains.
“Who are Ember Black and Cassidy Sullivan today?” Collette asks.
I look over at Cass, and I know she is struggling with that simple question as much as I am.
“Honestly, I have never seen a future that didn’t include Kevin. Is that bad?” I ask them.
Jo shakes her head. “No, of course it isn’t. He was your partner and husband, you’re supposed to envision your life with that person.”
“Seems like they were envisioning a different life,” Cassidy adds.
She’s not wrong.
“I know it was a long time ago, but can you think back to those girls who had a dream before the boys came along?” Jo asks.
Cassidy and I look at each other. “We always said we would open an interior design company together, that was always a dream, and we did do that, but it’s not solely ours.”
“You could still have that. You could separate the interior design business from your husbands’ business,” Collette explains.
“They would probably need to speak to lawyers. I’m not sure how easy that would be,” Jo adds.
Collette frowns. “You’re right. Doesn’t mean they can’t start up a new company until things are settled between the four of them. What about Sullivan Black Designs?”
I still, hearing her company name suggestion. That has a nice ring to it.
“Oh, I like it,” Cassidy says.
“Me too,” I tell my friend.
“Ooohhh, this is good,” Collette says excitedly.
“We know so many people that need help with interior design. Also, look at all the hockey guys. They all live in bachelor pads, they need help.” This makes me smile.
“Also, Harper and Issy are billionaires and know everyone in this city. They would easily put in a good word for you and help get you clients.”
“In New York?” I ask.
“Yeah, unless you are moving back to Wisconsin?” Collette asks.
“Hadn’t thought about it,” I tell her.
“Oh, I just assumed, but it can still work there,” she states.
“We always said we would live in New York together,” Cassidy tells me.
“Yeah, when we were kids, binge-watching Sex and the City behind our parents’ backs.”
“And?” Cassidy raises a brow at me.
“You’re seriously considering moving here?” I ask her.
“I don’t know, but I’m also not sure if I want to go home and face being around the two of them.
We live in a small town, everyone knows us.
Looking at people’s pitying faces as we try to start over there, yeah, no thanks,” Cassidy explains.
She’s right, this story would be fueling the town’s gossip for years to come.
“You don’t have to make any decisions tonight, but you ladies have options,” Jo tells us.
And maybe she is right.
“We told the boys we would contact them in a week. Do you think that is enough time to get our lives sorted?” Cassidy asks.
“No.” I chuckle.
“You don’t have to make a decision in a week either. You don’t owe your husbands a thing, they did this to you both. You take as much time as you both need to work it out,” Jo says adamantly.
I knock back the rest of my champagne. She’s right, we don’t have to make decisions right now, but we also can’t mope all day on the couch like we have today.
“Some days you’re going to laugh, and some days you’re going to cry. That is grief,” Jo explains.
“Also, we’ve made assumptions that the two of you are not getting back together with your husbands, and we don’t want to make that decision for you. There is no judgment if you do want to reconcile,” Collette adds.
“I can’t stand to look at him.” Cassidy sneers.
“It’s fresh. But maybe after counseling? Many marriages can be saved after a partner cheats,” Collette explains.
Cassidy shakes her head. “I know, but I deserve more. I’m not what my husband wants, clearly, so why would I hang onto a life that doesn’t exist anymore?
We can never go back, the damage is done.
Do I still love him? Yes, because I’ve been in love with him for what feels like a lifetime, but he also destroyed that love.
Our relationship was far from perfect. We had been struggling with our marriage for a while, and I guess those problems now make sense. ”
“I’m sorry,” Jo says.
“Every marriage will go through ups and downs, that’s life, but we had always been able to get through it together, but I guess … he didn’t want to do it together anymore.”
“You girls deserve so much more,” Collette states.
“We do, and we will get there, but it’s going to take time,” I tell her.
“And more champagne.” She giggles, reaching for another bottle.