Chapter Thirty-Four
Aubrey
It had been a week since her rescue, and bright lights still bothered her. Her doctor said concussion symptoms can last for weeks to months after the fact, which left Bree feeling particularly grumpy. She and Noah had been staying at a hotel since his house triggered bad memories for her, and her house was overrun by paparazzi who were looking for the scoop on her kidnapping. Vultures.
They checked out of the hotel and stopped in at the cafe to grab some coffee on their way to the hospital to talk with Jessica’s doctor. The walk through the doors was harder than ever, the weight of Jessica’s care now firmly on Bree’s shoulders since the lawyers had called to let her know she’d won power of attorney. When they reached the doctor’s office, she reached out and knocked, Noah’s hand warm and supportive on her back.
“Come in.” Dr. Matthews called.
“Aubrey, Noah.” He said, greeting them as they walked in. “How can I help you?”
“I umm…I was recently given power of attorney for Jess and…and I was wondering if your opinion has changed at all. Since last time we spoke.”
The doctor gave a grim nod of understanding, compassion, and honesty written on the planes of his face. “I’m sorry, Aubrey. I have to say that in my medical opinion, nothing has changed, and it is extremely unlikely it ever will. Your sister has been gone for a long time. The machines are just keeping her body alive.”
The crushing weight of despair slammed into Bree like a freight train, and it felt hard to breathe. Her sister had been her best friend growing up—an anchor in a household that was tumultuous at best. But her sister was gone, and admitting that…it was harder than she imagined. She took a deep breath and found solace in the warmth of Noah’s hand around hers. Solid. Unfailing. “I’d like to…I’d like to end life support interventions.” Bree said, her heartbreaking further as flashes of life with Jess flitted through her mind.
“You don’t have to make that decision today.” Dr. Matthews said.
Bree paused and considered what the doctor was offering her. More time to think. More days to come by and bring her sister’s favorite flowers to her bedside. More time to engage in one-sided conversation in the hopes that maybe she hears. Maybe she’ll get better. Maybe something could be different. But nothing would be different. Keeping her here…keeping her here for more flowers and stilted bedside conversations would be selfish at best. Cruel at worst.
Bree shook her head, her eyes filling with tears despite her resolve to stay strong and not break down. “She’s suffered long enough. I…I wouldn’t want to be left that way. Not if there was no chance of me getting better. And Jessica…Jess wouldn’t have wanted that either.” Noah’s hands rubbed up and down her back in silent support as the doctor and Bree worked out logistics. They’d come back tomorrow afternoon to say their goodbyes.
“Thank you, Dr. Matthews. For everything.” Bree said, reaching out to shake his hand.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t do more.” He replied, shaking her hand kindly.
Noah and Bree got up and left the office, intent to visit Jess before tomorrow. “I’d like to sit with her for a while,” Bree told Noah softly. “I…I’m not ready yet.”
“We can stay as long as you’d like,” Noah said, guiding her gently through the halls though she knew them like the back of her hand. Still, his support was all that kept her from running from the building. From falling to the ground and pulling out her hair, screaming about how unfair this was. How horrible it was. His support…it was everything.
They walked around the corner and into Jessica’s room, for once empty aside from the two of them.
“I’m so sorry you’ve been stuck here for so long, Jess,” Bree said through her tears as she sat next to her and cradled Jess’s hand in her own. “I’m sorry for the fight we had before your accident and for not standing up to Dad for you. For letting them drag this out for you for so long. I love you. We love you.” Bree sat down and let the tears fall, holding Jess’s hand and listening to the steady beat of the heart monitor she was attached to, the soft whirring of the ventilator constantly running in the background.
“What are you doing here?” A sharp voice said from the doorway. Bree’s dad’s arms rested around her mother for the first time in a long time as they looked at Noah warily.
“I was here to see Jess, but we’re going now,” Bree said as she stood, already tired. Noah stepped up beside her, his hand a solid support on her back. “But before we do…I wanted to let you know that Jess will be taken off life support tomorrow.”
Bree’s parents stepped back slightly as though they’d been slapped. “You don’t get to have a say in what happens to our daughter.” Her dad spat.
Noah moved quickly, putting his body slightly in front of hers, violence etched in the lines of his face. He would fight for her and it made Bree love him all the more. But this wasn’t his fight. Bree tapped him lightly on the back and stepped around him. “I’m not debating this with you. I am letting you know that Jess will be removed from life support tomorrow afternoon if you’d like to be here.” She said calmly. “I’m sorry for your loss.” Bree looked up at Noah and nudged his shoulder. “Let’s go, love.”
Noah looked down at her and nodded, reaching out and taking her hand in his. They walked around the bed and headed for the door. Her dad stood in the way, and Noah stepped closer to him, invading his space just like he had with Justin. “She’s being far kinder than I would,” Noah said quietly. “And I have no qualms about sitting you down again. So back off.”
Warmth flooded through her as she fully appreciated the man by her side. She had always longed for a champion—someone to stand in her corner and stand up for her when she couldn’t. Now that she had learned to stand up for herself, she didn”t need him in that capacity, but still found herself exceptionally grateful that she didn’t have to fight every battle alone. Noah squeezed her hand gently in reassurance, his eyes trained fully on her dad.
Dad looked like he was going to object before Mom came over and placed her hand on his arm. “It’s enough, Charles. Our girls have been through enough.”
Dad stepped out of the doorway, and Noah and Bree walked out—Noah’s body remained tense until they stepped outside into the fresh air. “I couldn’t do what you just did. I just want to hit something.”
Bree shrugged. “They’re losing a daughter too. And it doesn’t do me—or you—any good to take our feelings out on them. It’s time to let it all go. I don’t care if they like me or what I do for a living or who I’m dating or where I live. I don’t really care about the reasons they had for keeping Jess on life support so long or pushing the financial responsibility to me. I don’t even care if my mom knew about the gambling—though since they often fought about finances growing up, I’m sure she does. I just don’t care anymore. They can live their life, and I can live mine. I have you. And Theo. And Eli and Peter. And Zach. I’ll be okay. And they will, too. One day.”
Noah shook his head. “If you say so, babe.”
“I think I’d like to go back to my house too.”
“But the paps—”
Bree blanched as she thought of the paparazzi who’d frequently been hanging out in front of her home since the story broke about her stalker and subsequent kidnapping. One of these days she was sure they’d get bored and move on to greener pastures. Thankfully, her life was too boring to interest the tabloids for now. “We’ll handle them. But I’m not letting them run me out of my home. I worked hard for that house, and I love it. My little bungalow. But you can come and visit—sometimes.” Bree said, smiling at him cheekily.
“Oh, I can visit sometimes, huh?” His chuckle filled the parking lot as he wrapped a warm arm around her. “Only if sometimes is most days ending in -Y.”
“I suppose I’m amenable to that.” She laughed.
Noah opened the car door for her and watched her closely. “I love you, Aubrey Gray.”
Her heart leaped in her chest, and she smiled at him. “I love you too, Noah Hawthorne,” Bree said, leaning in for a kiss. His lips moved expertly over hers, and she leaned into him as his hand rested on her left cheek. He smiled into the kiss before pulling away, gently caressing her cheek. They’d get through this.
She would get through this.
***
The next afternoon, Bree stood in a silent vigil with Noah at her side as the nurses prepared to end Jess’s life support. The soft whirring of the machines and comforting beeps indicating she was alive grounded Bree to the spot when it felt like she would be adrift in her grief. The hospital room door opened, and her mother walked in, dark circles under her bloodshot eyes and tears streaming down her face. She walked over to where Noah and Bree stood, careful to stay out of the way of the bustling staff. A few minutes later, Dr. Mathews walked in and looked at the threesome standing watch over Jess. “Will you please step out for a moment? I’m going to remove her breathing tube, and we’ll get the alarms turned off. I’ll call you back in shortly.”
Noah nodded for the women, and Bree felt him shepherd them gently out into the hallway.
“Is he coming?” Bree asked her mom quietly, both of them painfully aware of which he Bree was talking about.
Mom sniffled. “I’m not sure. He’s here somewhere, though.”
The three of them stood in the hallway, the dinging of call lights and quiet chatter from the nurses and families in other rooms a familiar cacophony yet painful as their time here came to an end.
Dr. Matthews appeared a few moments later. “You can go back in now. I’m so sorry for your loss.” He added, shaking hands with Bree, her mom, and Noah before walking down the hall. Bree couldn’t imagine having his job. They walked back into the room where a nurse was checking over the last of the equipment. She smiled softly, one of the soft apologetic smiles where they aren’t sure what to say, but want you to know they understand you’re grieving, before walking toward the door.
“Press the call light if you need anything. Stay as long as you’d like.” She added, ducking into the hall quietly.
Jess’s chest rose and fell rhythmically, and without the tubes and beeping machines, Bree could almost imagine Jess was just asleep. The hospital room door opened, and her dad walked in, his eyes flickering between Jess and his wife.
Mom sobbed and walked over to him, clinging to him as tears fell down her face. Bree shifted uncomfortably, and Noah wrapped his arm around her shoulder. They waited in silence as Jess’s respirations slowed down before stopping altogether. Her chest settled one final time, and a loud wail came from across the room, startling Bree in Noah’s arms. Bree’s mom fell to the floor, sobs shaking her body as she rested a hand on Jess’s leg. Dad rested his hand lightly on Mom’s shaking shoulders as though he was uncertain how to comfort the distraught woman.
The wails pierced the quiet room for several minutes until quiet sobs took over, and Bree felt tears trickling down her cheeks. She hurriedly wiped them away, not wanting to break down in front of anyone—especially not her parents. After a moment, she stood and walked over to Jess, smoothing back her hair gently. “Goodbye Jessie,” Bree said softly, her voice catching on a barely suppressed sob.
She took Noah’s hand and walked carefully around her grieving parents, her anxiety lessening as they stepped out of the hospital and into the fresh air.
“Bree?” Noah asked concern etched on his face. Bree shook her head, unable to put the emotions weighing on her into words. Grief. Relief. Sadness. Joy. Freedom. Devastation. All warring for a place in her scarred heart. She sent up a silent prayer and felt a quiet peace. She would heal. And one day, she would see her sister again.
“Let’s go home,” Bree said softly.
Noah wrapped Bree tightly in his arms and pressed his lips to her hair gently. “I love you, Aubrey Gray.”
“I love you, too.” She said, nuzzling into him before stepping into his car and into their future.