Chapter 3
3
M argo woke and glanced at the clock on the bedside table. Six o'clock in the morning. She'd slept four hours. They'd gotten home late last night after Logan's passing. They had a glass of wine to take the edge off, and she climbed into bed exhausted at two. Her sisters were in the spare bedrooms, hopefully getting some much-needed rest. She stared at the ceiling, thinking about all that had to be done. Logan would never be here again.
Though truth be told, in recent years, he'd been away more than he'd been home. He fancied himself as a real estate agent for the entire state. He was flying down to Miami often and sometimes then up to Tallahassee brokering deals. Though he hadn't gained many new listings, he was trying. She admired him for that.
Giving herself a couple more minutes, she sat upright, rubbed her fingers around her eyes, and took a deep breath before standing.
Slowly making her way to the door, she straightened the pajamas she wore. The tank top and shorts had been a gift from Logan last year. Before opening the door and letting the day begin, she took a deep breath to steady her emotions. She silently padded down the hallway. The house was quiet right now. Her sisters, who needed as much sleep as she did, were thankfully still sleeping.
Grateful that, out of habit, she'd put the coffee pot timer on and that it was now fully brewed. She made herself a cup of coffee and decided to sit outside on the deck. It was warm already this morning. The thermometer said it was seventy. It was going to be a hot one today, near ninety-seven, if the weatherman was correct.
Silently sliding the patio door open, she stepped outside and braced herself for the humidity that hit her full force. She sat in her favorite chair, one of the teal Adirondack chairs facing her flowerbeds. Logan's favorite had been the orange chair to her right. Sipping her coffee, she absently watched the butterflies gracefully landing on the flowers.
Her mind only allowed her a few moments of tranquility before the barrage of appointments hit. They had an appointment at the funeral home today to make arrangements. She'd probably need to go to the bank and figure out what had to be done with the business accounts. Maybe that could wait until next week. Grateful that her home was paid for, and she paid the bills regularly as opposed to Logan. She knew things here would be fine. Lonely, probably, but financially, she was fine. She took another sip of her coffee when she heard the patio door slide open slowly. Turning her head, she saw her oldest sister, Carley, standing in the doorway.
"Just checking to see if you had a cup of coffee. I'll bring mine out in a minute."
Margo nodded, took another sip from her cup, and waited. Carley stepped out of the house, and the cool air from the air conditioner swept out and touched her before the door closed. Carley sat in the chair next to her. Logan's chair.
"Did you sleep?" Carly asked.
"Not much. Four hours I'm guessing. How about you?"
Carley shrugged. "About the same."
She nodded her head. "I was just thinking about all the things we're going to have to do today."
"Yeah, that's what woke me up, too."
"Never dreamed I'd be in this situation. At least not when I was only 43 forty three."
"Well, I guess we never know, right?"
"Right? Guess we never do."
Carley took another sip, opened her mouth to say something, and then thought better of it and closed her mouth.
Margo waited. She wasn't sure if she could handle anything else right now, anyway.
Soon, her youngest sister, Josseline, stepped outside, pulled another of the teal chairs from across the deck, and sat down on the other side of Carley. She sipped her coffee, ran her hands through her long, dark hair, and let out a deep breath.
Margo glanced at her youngest sister. Her demeanor seemed off. They'd had family members pass before, and she'd never behaved like this.
"What's going on with you, Josseline?"
Her sister turned her head to stare at her. Her eyebrows shot up in her hairline. "What do you mean what's going on?"
"I mean, what's going on? Yesterday I got the feeling you were irritated about being at the hospital. Today you seem... I don't know, put out."
Josseline shook her head. "I'm not put out. We all handle stress differently, Margo. I know that you've got a lot on your plate right now, and you don't even know what I've got on mine. So what do you want? You want me to be crying and sobbing and wailing?"
Margo's shoulders tensed. "No, I don't want that."
Carley, leaned over and patted her hand. "Let's not argue. We need each other right now more than ever."
"I know." Margo let out a deep breath, took another sip of her coffee, and continued to stare at her flowers. A bee buzzed from flower to flower. She watched it for a few moments, mesmerized by the beauty of it all. The birds and the bees. It seemed so simple.
She stared at her purple cone flowers and the bee that was even now pollinating them. And she thought of Logan. Those were his favorites. A thought popped into her head.
" I think I'm gonna cut some of those purple cone flowers and take them to the flower shop and have them make an arrangement for Logan's casket. Those were his favorite flowers, and I think it's poignant that they would be coming from our garden."
Carley nodded and softly said, "That's a good idea, Margo."
Josseline said nothing, which irritated Margo, but she redirected her thoughts around how many flowers she would need to cut and how soon she would need to get them to the flower shop after she cut them. Then her thoughts jumped to what time their appointment was at the funeral home, and quite frankly, all the things began to once again circle around in her head.
Her younger sister, Holly, stepped out on the deck. Cup of coffee in hand and the coffee pot in the other to refill anyone who needed one. Without saying a word, she just went from sister to sister and refilled their cups. She stepped back inside, returned quickly, pulled up a chair, and sat on the other side of Margo. "Did you sleep, Margo?"
"About four hours I guess."
"Okay, well, that's better than three hours, right?"
Margo chuckled, "Right?"
Holly continued. "Okay, so today we have to be at the funeral home at ten. Have you decided on cremation or burial?"
Margo closed her eyes for a moment. No, she hadn't decided on that at all. She let out a deep breath. "Logan had told me he wanted to be cremated." Margo tilted her head to the left. "It was weird and sudden. Out of the blue, after he was admitted, he told me to cremate him.”
"Okay, well, that's good, I guess. We'll tell the funeral home that. I think we have the option of having a viewing and funeral with him right away with a viewing, and then they cremate him later, or I think it takes a week or two for the cremation and then we can have a memorial service with his ashes present. Do you know what you want?"
She let out a deep breath. "No, I don't know, but I think because we are so well known in town, we should probably have a traditional showing and then cremation. I couldn't bear to sit around for a week or two waiting for him to be cremated before going through a memorial service. At this point, I feel exhausted, and I just want to get it over with." She took a deep breath. "Does that sound harsh?"
Carley shook her head. “It doesn't sound harsh. At this point, you have to do what you think is right and what's right for you. Logan isn't here for any of it.”
Josseline said nothing. She lifted her cup to her lips and sipped her coffee.
Margo sipped some more and then stood. Josseline's attitude was really getting on her nerves, and she didn't need to be arguing with her sisters right now. They were her support system.
"I'm gonna go take a shower and get dressed, and then we can eat some breakfast, and from there, we'll start the day. Will you all be with me today, or are some of you staying back?" She purposely looked at Josseline, who smiled sweetly and said, "We'll all be with you today, Margo."
She nodded once and stepped through the kitchen door. The cool air felt chilling but so welcome. She set her nearly empty cup of coffee on the counter and made her way down the hallway to her bedroom.
As soon as she entered, she stared across the room at Logan's closet. They had separate closets. When they'd built this house, that was a must. Each of them had to have their own closet. She thought now about having to clean that out. What is she to do with all of his clothes and belongings? His golf clubs, his baseball glove, his baseball bats, and his stupid hobby of making fishing bobbers and lures. God, she hated the time he spent down in the basement making his stupid fishing stuff. But it was something he loved. And then, in the last few years, when he had gotten it in his head to be THE real estate agent in Florida and started doing more traveling, his fishing bobber and lure business sort of sat in decline. Not that he'd had a strong business, but he had a few area fishermen who paid for most of the supplies he needed for his hobby. Maybe one of them would want to take over. She'd have to see if she could find their names.
She started the water in her shower and pulled her clothes from her closet. What was appropriate? Did she have to wear all black? They didn't really do that anymore, did they? She certainly wasn't living in a time where they had to wear black for a year afterward. She'd wear black at the funeral. Letting out a deeply held breath, she opted for subdued.
Stepping into the warm spray of water, she closed her eyes and let the water clean away all of the ickiness from the past few days. She sent up a prayer that this could be a cleansing of sorts. A fresh start. Afterward, she dried her hair and wondered if she should get it cut. It hung down to her bra strap. She'd always left it long because Logan loved it. But damn, it was hot in Florida. There were so many days when she thought about just chopping it off but then reasoned with it long, she could pull it up easily.
She dried her hair and dressed. She'd decided on a light pair of gray slacks and a gray and white lightweight top to match. She strode out to the kitchen and heard her sisters cooking and laughing. And tears stung her eyes. Her sister, Holly, saw her first and said, "Oh, Margo, we're sorry we didn't mean to make you cry."
Margo shook her head. "I'm not crying because of you all. I'm crying because the laughter sounded so good, and it feels like it's been ages since I've heard laughter in this house."
Her sisters looked at each other, their faces tense.
Carley moved to her and wrapped her arms around Margo's shoulders.
"Come on, sit down here. Let us feed you. Then we'll all get ready to go and make the arrangements we need to make today." She sat and ate, though she moved her food around on her plate more than anything. But Holly had made them a wonderful omelet and some toast, and it was delicious, but she just really didn't have an appetite right now. She ate what she could.
Josseline got up and began picking up the dishes. Her eyes landed on Margo's. "We're going have to start making phone calls. Do you want to divvy up a list of people for us to call? We can do that today, so it's not a shock when they see the obituary. And speaking of, we're going to need to write an obituary."
She hadn't thought of that. She hadn't thought of any of that. "Yes..." she halted a moment, "I will..." She pulled her phone off the table and started naming off some people who had to be called. Her sisters pulled their phones out as well, and if they had that contact in their phones, they volunteered to call that person. And then she gasped, "Oh my god, I didn't even think of this. Where's Logan's phone? I must have left it at the hospital. There'll be contacts in his phone that I don't have. I should... I should get that. Let me call the hospital."
Carley stopped her with a hand covering her hand. "No, honey, we'll take care of that, okay? We'll take care of that. You take care of calling those you want to call. Go in the office, make yourself comfortable where you're alone, and make your calls. We'll make our calls out here."
"Okay." She gratefully did as she was told because right now, it felt so good to be told what needed to be done. She strolled to the office and sat down to make her first call to their receptionist, Addison, at the real estate office.
Their parents had died a few years ago, about a year apart, so she didn't have parents to call, but they did have aunts, uncles, and cousins. The sisters had all spoken to their significant others last night. So today, it was extended family and friends. Logan's parents had passed several years ago, and he was an only child, but he did have a couple of aunts and uncles she'd call. She made her calls and then made a mental note to ask for Logan's phone later and she would go through his list of contacts and see who else needed to be notified.
Soon her sister, Josseline, tapped on the door of the office. "Hey, Margo, we have to get going now. Our appointment at the funeral home is in fifteen minutes."
"Oh my gosh, I didn't even realize how quickly the time passed today."
"Okay." Josseline waited for her at the door, and as soon as Margo approached, she put her arms around Margo and gave her a hug. "I'm sorry if I stressed you out. I sure don't mean to. I love you."
"I love you too, Josseline."
Josseline sniffed lightly. "Okay, so let's get going. Grab your purse, and we'll take off."