Chapter 4
Harper pulled her car up and parked in her usual spot right in front of the house. She gathered her purse, her phone and her left over pizza, got out of her car and headed toward the house. She was still grinning ear-to-ear when she unlocked the door and stepped inside.
“There she is! And what a smile! You must have had a good day.” Travis said. “I was wondering what you were up to.”
Harper rolled her eyes at him. “No, you weren’t. You watch every move I make when I'm not here. And some when I’m here, too, I’m sure.”
Travis laughed. “It’s just because I love you. We’ve only got one of you, you know.”
“And whose fault is that?” Harper asked.
“Your dad’s,” her mother said coming into the living room from their bedroom wearing a bathrobe and with her hair in a towel. “He passed out when he saw me give birth to you and refused to even discuss another baby. He was afraid I’d die.”
“Horrible, horrible thing to see. I thought she was going to split right in half. And as much as I loved you, I wasn’t risking your mom again. I had her, I had you. I didn’t need any more.”
Harper laughed as she went into the kitchen to put her pizza in the fridge. “And now you’re stuck with me.”
“Not stuck, baby — blessed. You’re the best thing that ever happened to us,” Travis said.
“Is your horse okay?” Libby asked.
Harper gave her mother a funny look as she walked back into the living room.
“What? What’s that look for?” Libby asked.
“You don’t care about the horse.”
“I do.”
“No, you don’t. All you want is me to live out my life here, keeping your dreams alive.”
“Honey, we do care about the horse. We know it’s important to you.”
“It’s a she; she’s very important to me. They all are. I love it there. Just being there gives me a sense of peace and belonging that I don’t get here.”
“You’re saying you don’t feel like you belong with your own family on a farm built and maintained by your family, for you?!” Travis asked, picking up the remote control and muting the television.
“No. I’m talking about when I get there and the horses are all glad to see me.
When I work with them, train them, treat their muscle strains, or help keep them calm as they get their hooves trimmed.
I feel like I’m making a difference. Something about being on the land the stables are on, the horses are a part of, makes me stop and take a deep breath. It grounds me.”
“And what do you feel when you’re working here?” Libby asked.
“Just that it’s work. It needs to be done.
That I don’t want to disappoint either of you.
That I wish you knew how much it means to me to be important to creatures that calm only when I’m around.
Animals that trust me to make their lives easier and comfortable.
But you don’t see that. All you see is that I don’t duplicate what you feel when you’re working here. And frankly, that hurts.”
“Because I want you take over the farm? It hurts because I want to hand you a future? It’s successful! Crazy successful. We worked hard building it up for you, and for Scotty and his family, too. What hurts is that you don’t seem to value that,” Travis said.
“I do value it. And I’ll always be a part of it. Especially when it’s the busy season. But don’t I deserve the opportunity to follow my dreams? To build my own life doing the things that bring me joy and to become successful on my own terms, as well?” Harper demanded.
Travis sat there, his eyes on his daughter, the pride he felt in the strong, independent young woman that she’d grown into being replaced by a feeling of betrayal.
He was offended that she didn’t want the legacy he’d struggled to keep alive and grow for her and had no regard for the sacrifices he’d made to ensure that she had a future, that his family before him had made to be sure that they all had a future that didn’t depend on anyone else but their own family.
“You just have no regard for this place and what it means to our family.”
“I do! But you have never taken the time to listen to me, to SEE me. To learn anything about the things that I want, the things that are a part of me. All you want me to do is take on the things that mean something to you because that’s what you did.”
“Don’t forget who you are speaking to, young lady,” Travis said tightly from between clenched teeth.
“I’m not trying to be disrespectful. I’m trying to talk to you as the adult I am instead of the child you still treat me as.”
“You both need to bring it down a notch,” Libby said.
Travis’s gaze shot over to Libby. He nodded his acquiescence.
“Yes, ma’am,” Harper said.
“Good. Now, let’s try again. Harper, go ahead.”
Harper took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I mean, what about Scotty? Doesn’t he own a stake in this farm, too? Doesn’t he want his kids to help run it one day?”
“He does, and they’ll help,” Travis said.
“Dear, Lord. Can you imagine that?” Libby asked.
Harper snickered a little. “They’ll grow into themselves at some point.
And maybe they won’t want to be a part of it.
Maybe they’ll want to follow their own dreams like I do.
But I’m willing to bet one of them will.
And we’ll all be here to help just like we do now.
And the Pride will be like they always are, standing beside us when we need them.
I’m not walking away. I’ll always be here when you guys need me, when this place needs me.
I’m just saying I want some of my own dreams, too. ”
Travis shook his head as he aimed the remote at the television and turned the volume back on, not even looking her way.
“I don’t want you angry with me, Daddy,” Harper said.
He shook his head. “I’m not angry with you, Harper.”
“Or disappointed.”
“How can I be anything other than disappointed? You have no regard for the work, the dedication that it takes to keep this place profitable. All you’re worried about is some pipe dream filled with horses that aren’t even yours.
But you know what? It’s fine. Somebody else’s horses are more important than our family, more important to the services we provide to the families in town all through the seasons and the holidays. ”
“I didn’t say that, but why can’t you see that there are things I want for my life?”
“Because this is our life!” he insisted, his voice raised, but not quite yelling as he looked angrily at her.
She watched him quietly, gauging his anger, feeling completely unseen by him. “It’s your life. It’s what you chose. Why don’t I get to choose?”
He aimed the remote at the TV again, turning the volume up drastically. “It’s fine, alright? Let’s just see how things develop.”
“Which means just ignore it and push it under the rug and maybe you can convince me tomorrow.”
Travis’s face was less than impressed as he looked her in the eye.
“I’m going to bed. I have an early day tomorrow.”
“With the horses,” Travis said sarcastically.
“Yes, with the horses. Why? It’s Sunday. It’s my time, isn’t it? Are we working here tomorrow?”
“Nope. Just making sure I know where you’ll be.”
“You always know where I’ll be,” she said as she left the room, waggling her phone at him to remind him that she knew he tracked her.
Travis sighed as he sat back heavily against the sofa and scrubbed his hands down his face.
“She’s right, you know?” Libby said quietly as she sat beside him.
“It’s not what I ever saw happening. I thought of us as a family unit, all working toward the same thing.
I never considered that she’d grow up and have her own ideas and desires that weren’t in line with our family and our business.
And yes, I hear how selfish and controlling that sounds when I say that.
But isn’t she the one turning her back on us? ”
“She’s not turning her back on us. The fact that she has her own dreams doesn’t mean that we don’t have her support.”
“How do you figure that?” Travis asked doubtfully.
“She’s said as much!”
He glared at her.
“She’s working her butt off at the equine center, trying to keep the Bigsbys in business and the horses taken care of.
And she still comes back here, and sometimes before she goes to the center she does more than her share of the planting and the pruning and the fertilizing, and keeping the grounds around the trees clear of debris and entertaining customers at the Christmas Fair, and the Fall Fair, and the Strawberry Patch and Pumpkin Patch field trips the schools bring the kids to, and whatever else we have going on.
She never, ever takes time for herself to have a private life.
She never has. She deserves to find her happiness wherever it lies, and not be relegated to a life we thought of for her before she was even born. ”
“She doesn’t appreciate what she has and she doesn’t want it.”
“She does appreciate it. She just wants something totally different. Everybody has ideas of what they want to do with their lives. We have no right to tell her how she’s going to spend hers. That’s up to her. Everybody else grows up and gets to find their way. She shouldn’t have to walk our path.”
“You’ve certainly changed perspective,” Travis said.
“Honestly, I’ve known since she was eight years old and caught that runaway horse that she had a unique gift.
And that her heart lay elsewhere. But I’d hoped that we could keep her here, where we could protect her and watch over her.
It was selfish to think that way, though.
Do you realize she’s never even been out on a date. ”
“Realize it? I’m thankful for it!” Travis said.
Libby laughed, but then made herself stop.
“That’s not funny. How’s she going to find her mate if she never has any time to go out and have fun?
She’s never just out having fun. It’s Pride business.
It’s tree business. Or it’s the horses. What do you want for her?
To be an old maid, living out her life here with her elderly parents?
We should give her space, not put so much pressure on her. ”