Chapter 62
Theren sees a smear of blue in the doorway as Fenn rushes back into the sanctuary. Theren blocks Rava’s next blow, and her next, but he can’t find the focus he had before, he can’t think of anything but Fenn too close to Rava for comfort.
And then there’s a scream. A deep, horrible scream.
He knows that voice. It’s his mother’s.
“That sounded serious. My condolences,” Rava says, as their blades cross again, pressing into him.
Theren lets out a wounded noise, and trips backward. She pursues him, fast, pulling back her sword long enough to sweep his legs from under him with a well--placed kick. He lands hard on his back, and scrambles away from her, his vision blurred.
Fenn’s blue robes snap as he steps in front of Theren, his arms spread wide.
Rava halts in her pursuit, her sword high.
Theren thinks it’s instinct for her not to attack Fenn, rather than intention—-she has spent her life forbidden from doing violence to epocha, even though she likely is one herself.
Theren takes advantage of her hesitation and stands, chest heaving. He sidesteps Fenn to attack her again. This time he bears down on the blow with all of his strength, and she twists away, her stance collapsing. No matter how fast she is, she still can’t out--muscle him.
He pursues. He blocks with one arm and swings his sword with the other, hard, his shoulder aching with the impact. Rava screams into her teeth as she counters it. He backs her toward the wall, moving fast and predatory, all hesitance lost.
Then he shoves her against the wall, pushing his blade up and into her throat, only to find that her sword is between them, holding him back. Their faces are so close together he can see the freckles at the corners of her eyes, the deepening furrows in her forehead.
All the times he thought about killing her, and here it is, her life in his hands, her pulse quick in her throat—-
“You’re done,” he says roughly.
“I don’t think so,” she says, with a tight laugh. “To build a fulcrum, you need an epocha.”
Rava Vidar’s body suddenly loses all its tension, and he loses his grip on her. She slips down to the ground, like she’s made of water. Then she lunges up, and away from him, thrusting her sword up—-
And into the belly of Fenn Kovek.
Rava yanks the sword out right away, her eyes wide and mad, and Fenn falls to his knees on the stone.
Theren can’t think—-he can’t breathe. He’s aware that Nyx and Satka have stopped fighting, that his mother might be dead, that Elegy is still gone, but he sees dark blood spilling over Fenn’s hands and it’s all he can think about.
He throws himself at Rava without remembering that he’s even holding a sword, his teeth so tightly clenched they feel like they might crack under the strain.
He can hardly see; he can hardly think, all he can do is lunge at her.
He grabs her right hand, and she’s not expecting it—-reflexively, she releases the weapon stained with Fenn’s blood, and he brings his blade up to her throat.
He feels—-relief. As if something he’s been waiting for, longing for, is finally in his hands.
“Careful,” she says to him. “You need me alive.”
“There are plenty of epocha in this building,” he says. But even as he says it, he remembers: the fulcrum requires “one who bears the Vidari name.”
“What will you do?” Her eyes are bright with moonlight. “Kill Ileth Vidar’s daughter and then steal a holy epocha from a monastery? Do you believe that the entire nation of Cedre will not suffer the repercussions of such an act?”
He wants to spit in her face. He pushes the blade closer to her skin, so it bites her, and a drop of blood trails down to her collarbone.
“Cedre will suffer either way,” he says. “I may as well take my revenge.”
He feels a hand on his shoulder and almost lets go of Rava’s wrist to elbow whoever is touching him, a reflex. It’s Nyx, her grip firm.
“She won’t be spared our justice,” Nyx says coolly. “She’ll be tried, and she’ll be burned. Release her.”
“I find it amusing that you believe the child of Ileth Vidar will be given a fair trial,” Theren snaps. “Her mother has spent a lifetime covering up anything she doesn’t want people to see.”
He’s so close. One moment of misjudged pressure, one push, and he’ll do the thing he always planned to do—-the thing Maeve died to do—-the thing that will release him from the fear of Rava forever. The legendary soldier, the Butcher of Calgara, rendered small and fragile by the press of his knife.
“Theren,” Elegy’s voice says.
She feels cool and clear, as always. He feels her drawing closer, hears her scuffing footsteps.
He still hasn’t managed to teach her to walk quietly.
She doesn’t touch him, but steps into his line of vision.
He doesn’t know where she’s been, but she looks pale and shaken.
Vulnerable in a way he’s never seen her before.
Arias is walking behind her, bloody and limping but still intact. He points his own weapon at Rava’s back. They have her surrounded.
“Say your goodbyes to Fenn, while you still can,” Elegy says. “Let me take care of this.”
She covers his hand with her own, as if to take the sword from him. Her fingers are cool. He releases it almost without thinking, to let her take his place. There’s no question of disobeying her. His loyalty to her is stronger than his thirst for Rava’s blood.
Rava’s lip curls, and he turns away before she can say anything that will make him regret it.
He crouches in front of Fenn and puts his hands on his friend’s shoulders to keep him from pitching forward. Fenn’s eyes find his, and for once they aren’t distant, staring into a past that the rest of them can’t even remember. He looks like the man who swore his oath, the man Theren knew before.
“My parents already think I’m gone?” Fenn says to Theren, in a low, weak voice.
Theren nods. Fenn’s mother died last year, but there’s no reason to tell him that now.
“That’s good,” Fenn says. “That’s good.”
Fenn tips his forehead onto Theren’s shoulder, and Theren puts his arms around him.
“I’ll stay right here until you go,” Theren says softly, into his ear.
He can feel it, the moment Fenn loses consciousness. It’s like a fishing line that’s been cut, the tension suddenly gone. Theren smooths his hair behind his ear, and lowers him to the floor.