Chapter 2
Spencer
“ C harlie, I’ve stalled as long as I can but if you don’t get out of this car”—I glance through the rearview mirror at the blonde woman behind us and her vicious scowl—“Karen is going to exit her vehicle and slash my tires.”
“How do you even know her name? We don’t know anybody in Las Vegas.” My little sister, Charlotte, pouts and folds her arms over her chest.
I roll my eyes and grumble. “I don’t actually know her name. ‘Karen’ is an expression.”
“I hate it here.”
We’ve been in Las Vegas for exactly one week and this is Charlie’s constant response.
She’s like a parrot that only learned one phrase.
Our conversations go something like, “Hey, Charlie, want the bigger bedroom in our new apartment?” I hate it here.
“Hey, Charlie, do you want to go shopping for new school clothes?” I hate it here.
“Charlie, how about I make your favorite food, Cubanos?” I slow-roasted a pork shoulder for six hours, and even found a bakery that sells Cuban bread because I know my baby sister would appreciate a little taste of home.
And what did she say to my labor of love?
I really hate it here. I should’ve guessed her mood would not improve on her first day of school.
“Okay, grumpy.” I flick on my turn signal to try to get out of the carpool lane.
“Then I’m going to have to park instead and walk you in.
And just so you know, I’m going to be the most embarrassing big sister in the world.
Your cheek is going to be drenched from the big, sloppy kiss I give you right in front of all your little friends. ”
Charlie shoots me a look from the passenger seat.
She’s only eleven and really shouldn’t be up front, but I made an exception to help boost her confidence today.
I know it sucks to be the new girl. But she’s not the only one going through it.
Next week, it’ll be me. I loved working for Hessler Group.
My boss, Hank, has become more of a mentor than anything else.
It broke my heart to resign and move across the country.
It wasn’t my first choice. In fact, it was my last resort.
“What’s that look for?”
“I don’t have any friends, Spencer. All my friends are in Miami.”
That’s an exaggeration. Charlie has one good friend named Halley and a handful of online acquaintances she plays Roblox with. But I still feel guilty that I ripped her away from our home and moved her all the way here in the middle of the school year.
“You’re going to make friends fast. I promise.” I pat her knee twice, ending with a little squeeze.
She grows quiet, and my heart twists as a single tear drips down her cheek. “Why’d you do this? We had a house in Miami. Now we have a crappy apartment. You broke up with Jesse even though he’s really nice. And the worst part is we left Mom.”
I flick off my turn signal and relax into my seat.
Clenching my teeth, I try not to cry. I know Charlie doesn’t understand what Jesse did and why we had to leave.
She’s way too young to understand I was protecting her.
I can’t even ask for her forgiveness for my big fuckup because then I’d have to explain to her that she’s the product of an affair. An accidental affair, but still.
It’s why we look nothing alike. I’m tan-skinned with thick, naturally curly black hair.
Charlie has wispy-thin blond hair and blue eyes.
Charlie is a prodigy when it comes to singing.
I swear my shower curtain dies inside when I use my shampoo bottle as a microphone and belt out “Roar” by Katy Perry.
We’re so different, I get mistaken for her nanny more often than not.
But I promised my mom I’d protect her secret until my dying breath.
It wasn’t to spare her pride. It was so Charlie never felt like she was an accident or unwanted. We were, and always will be, a family.
I’m doing my best to keep what’s left of our family together. But every time Charlie says she hates Las Vegas, or hates me—which I pretend I don’t hear—it’s another tiny slash at my heart. It feels like death by a thousand paper cuts.
“Okay, missy, it’s time. Either grab your backpack and hop out right now, or brace yourself for that big, sloppy kiss.”
“ Fine. ” She unbuckles her seat belt and yanks up her brand-new purple backpack from between her legs with as much attitude as she can muster. “But just so you know, I’m running away after school. Have a nice life.”
I act like her threat doesn’t faze me, even though my little sister running away is among my top-five worst fears. “All right. Travel safely. I’m just bummed you’re going to miss our epic fun plans for tonight.”
She sneaks a glance at me through her peripheral vision. “What plans?”
“You said we don’t know anyone in Las Vegas, but you’re wrong , wrong , wrong ,” I singsong. “Remember my old boss, Lennox?”
She scrunches one eye, trying to remember. I only worked directly for Lennox for a few months before she left Miami. “Purple-hair lady?”
“There’s more to her than that, but sure. She’s throwing a fancy birthday party for her friend Avery tonight right on the Strip.”
“The Strip is for grown-up parties. You know I can’t go.” Charlie scowls at me, fury flooding her eyes. “So who is babysitting me, huh?”
“Well, Debbie Downer, guess what? Lennox rented out House of Blues and it’s a private event. I already checked and you can come. But if you so much as sniff anything other than water or Dr. Pepper, so help me God ?—”
“I won’t. I won’t ,” Charlie whines. “Are Shirley Temples okay?”
I chew on the inside of my cheek as I debate.
Shirley Temples look a lot like alcoholic drinks.
It takes me slipping up once for Child Services to swoop in and try to take Charlie from me.
I was only eighteen when I took legal guardianship for a six-year-old.
Everyone, including our case worker, thought I’d fail at this, but I made giving my sister a wholesome and safe childhood my life purpose.
“You can order a Shirley Temple if they put it in a sippy cup.”
She groans. “You’re so lame.”
“Or we could just skip it?” I lift an eyebrow warningly.
“No. I want to go. I’ll be good.” She makes a cross above her heart and holds out her pinky—our secret sister signal. “I swear.”
Looping my pinky through hers, I squeeze as tight as I can. “Is that finally a smile?”
She rolls her eyes and nods, but her sassy expression melts into a warm, wide smile.
“I love you, Charlie. I know this is a lot of change, but I promise we’re going to be okay. Everything I’m doing is for you. I need you to trust me, okay?”
She opens her mouth to say something but is cut off by a loud hoooonk from the car behind us, making us both jump.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I screech out as I smack the steering wheel. I’m so peeved at the Karen behind me for ruining the only sweet exchange I’ve had with my little sister in weeks that the curse word slipped right out. “I’m sorry. Don’t say that word.”
She slides me a teasing grin. “Which word?”
I touch two fingers to my temple and rub in little circles like I have a headache. “You know . I am trying very hard to be a good role model for you. But I’m human, and very occasionally, bad words slip out.”
She cackles as she flings the passenger door wide open. “Oh please, Spence. It’s not even the first time you’ve slipped today. ”
I point through the door. “Get out.”
After blowing me a kiss, she climbs out of the SUV and slams the door shut.
“Gentle,” I growl under my breath, knowing she can’t hear me. This is a really nice company vehicle. They said there was insurance on it, but I don’t know if I’m liable for scrapes and dings. I don’t want to show up on my first day of work having already wrecked company property.
I watch Charlie walk away with a little pep in her step. I don’t leave until she’s through the double doors of the school, disappearing into the crowd of students. We took a tour earlier this week. She knows exactly where to go for her first-period science class.
Right as I shift into drive, there’s another loud honk from behind me.
My blood starts to boil. I clench my fists so hard my knuckles crack.
Don’t do it, don’t do it. I try to calm down, but…
fuck it. I throw the car back into park and put my hand on the door handle, ready to go give this pushy asshole a piece of my mind, but suddenly, something deep inside holds me back.
I’m only twenty-three. No one would be surprised if I was a hothead and cursed this B out at the top of my lungs. I’m in Las Vegas. I should be going to parties on the Strip and getting so drunk I don’t remember my name. But also, I’m not just a twenty-three-year-old.
I sigh and release the door handle.
I’m not only her big sister, I’m the only mom Charlie has now.
Everything I do could create consequences for her.
What if the jerk behind me is the mother of the only friend she makes today?
Or worse, the mom of her first crush? I don’t get to act on impulse.
Since the day my mother died five years ago, it’s been my job to think of Charlie before myself.
I suck down my pride and make eye contact through the rearview mirror. After flipping on my turn signal, I hold up my palm as an apology for blocking the lane too long.
“I’m trying, Mom,” I say softly, looking up to the bright blue sky through the windshield. “I promise you, I’m trying.”