Chapter 12
Jane Bennet found it hard to pretend to be serene…and she almost never found it difficult to pretend!
She was angrier at Mr Darcy than she had ever been at anyone, in her entire life.
How dare he say her forgery was poor! How dare he call her reprehensible!
She was delighted that he would not be joining their family, but now she was finding it difficult to believe that, for a few hours at least, she had preferred him to the sweet smiles and easygoing manners of Mr Bingley.
An image of Mr Darcy looking so sternly at her arose in her mind, and Jane caught her breath again at the straight nose, the cleft chin, the finely carved brow…. How dare he be so very handsome when she hated him!
Jane knew it was not just Mr Darcy’s classical features that she found attractive.
His height, the breadth of his shoulders, his Master-of-Pemberley confidence and his graceful, distinguished carriage…
. Mr Darcy was a man, and in comparison, Mr Bingley had seemed to be a little boy with his eager grins and heedless attitudes.
But settling for Mr Bingley was superior, in Jane’s mind, to have no one at all. Which was her current state…. Thanks to the awful—the reprehensible Mr Darcy.
“Jane, we wanted to show you—” Kitty’s voice rang out in immense satisfaction, no doubt something to do with the bonnet she held dangling from pale pink ribbons. But Kitty stopped her approach and her words as she glimpsed her eldest sister’s face. “What is it?”
Jane exerted the effort necessary to arrange her face into its usual placid expression.
She smiled gently at her younger sister, and she said, “I am sorry to have disturbed you with my strong emotions, Kitty. It is just that Mr Darcy came again, and he was so very, very dreadful. It is truly no wonder that Lizzy chose Mr Wickham over him!”
Kitty looked down, and Jane wondered, just for a moment, if her sister did not believe her. But of course, that was nonsense. Jane had always had the confidence of her entire family, even the much-praised Lizzy, who was supposed to be so clever but who never once questioned Jane’s words or actions.
Kitty said, “It made me worry when Mr Darcy spoke of how wretched Mr Wickham is.”
Jane put all the assurance she could in her voice as she said, “Mr Darcy was lying. He is very jealous of Mr Wickham, and of course his feelings were hurt by Lizzy’s choice, so it is a bit hard to entirely blame him for lying—but you must not worry about Lizzy, Kitty.
She can be trusted to have chosen between the two men correctly. ”
“I suppose so. Yes, I have always felt that Lizzy can be trusted.”
Kitty’s voice was low and her words unguarded. For just a moment, Jane wondered if Kitty could mean that her sisters trusted Lizzy more than herself! But….
…Clearly Jane was becoming overwrought. Lizzy was impetuous and teasing and far too hasty to judge people.
And she had been gone so much this year, with her long visit with Charlotte and then her tour with her aunt and uncle.
Not only did the other Bennets—parents and younger sisters alike—trust steady, reliable, gentle Jane far more, her influence over the rest of the family had only risen as Lizzy was so often gone.
That assurance gave Jane the strength she needed to block out all thoughts of Mr Darcy, to solidify her mask of kindliness and imperturbability. Smiling, she asked Kitty, “Tell me about this lovely bonnet….”