12. Chuseok #3
Dae was joking, but he had no idea how much Theo wanted to. He took his hand and shook, solidifying the deal with the universe, holding on a little too long before pulling away and reaching into the box to find another trophy, this one for an essay competition. In French. He scoffed with disgust.
“Do you realize how unreasonable it is to be good at everything?”
Dae’s shy smile was like an equalizer, and everything was once again right with the world. “If it makes you feel better, I’m kind of bad at math.”
“That does make me feel better. What else?”
He bit his lip in thought. “Tap dancing?”
“Have you ever tried tap dancing?”
“No.”
“Then it doesn’t count. You could be amazing and just don’t know it yet.” The next thing Theo pulled out was familiar. He’d stared at it through a glass case for months, picturing it on his shelf, imagining the praise he’d get once he had it. “Dae.”
“Hmm?”
“I did care about the speech competition.”
Dae kept his face neutral and his voice monotone. “You don’t say.”
“That obvious?” He nodded but didn’t take the opportunity to rub it in.
Theo had manipulated that day so much in his memory that it barely resembled reality anymore.
He convinced himself it wasn’t important, that he was doing it for a laugh, that the hours he’d spent practicing didn’t matter.
“My dad was supposed to be there, but...”
Theo had looked into the crowd, saw his mom and aunt sitting alone, and the disappointment had coated his throat, dulling his words and making him stumble.
Dae leaned across the box to put a hand on his shoulder, giving him a comforting squeeze as laughter floated up the stairs.
Theo expelled the self-pity. It had never served him before. “Why did you guys move?”
“Um.” Dae blinked at the abrupt shift. “My mom got a job at McMaster University.”
“Ah. That’s so normal. It was right after provincials, so I thought…” He looked down at the trophy in his hands.
“What?” Dae cocked his head, his lips flirting with an amused smile. “I bombed so hard at the competition that my family relocated out of shame?”
Theo’s answer came out a pouty mumble. “I had other theories.”
It wasn’t fair that Theo was so desperate for Dae’s dimples that he loved his laugh even when it was maliciously directed at him. “Such as?”
“Anyway.” He slid the box back to him. “Thank you for today. You have an awesome family.” Now that he knew them, it was obvious Dae’s performance at the speech competition wouldn’t have been met with anything but support. That was who they were.
It was strange how comparison could shake loose a realization.
Theo’s mom and aunt were amazing and they loved him, but his whole life, they’d been too busy to pay much attention to him beyond making sure he was alive and not actively unhappy.
And his dad…well. Theo had never had anyone take care of him in the way he saw today.
Not until Dae. Not until Caleb and Jason and Jordan; the small community he’d somehow built, despite his nature to run.
“Dae…”
“Hmm?”
“This is forever, right?”
Dae blinked at him, his mouth parting in confusion. “What?”
“You and me?” Theo needed him too much, he saw that now. He didn’t know how to stop, but he did know how to keep him. “And the guys. We’ll stay the way we are now, right?”
Dae’s dark eyes slid between Theo’s before nodding. “Of course.”
Theo took it as a reassurance. A declaration of intent. A promise. Dae wouldn’t let Theo ruin what they had.
The raucous sounds of togetherness reached a crescendo that broke through the moment. Theo shook off the intensity, literally shaking his shoulders with a nervous laugh. “I like your family.”
“Yeah.” Dae nodded, trying to catch up to the shift. “Right, well. I think they like you more than me.”
That wasn’t the last time that joke was made.
Dae’s mom said it when she handed Theo three different containers of leftovers.
His dad said it when he gave him a book detailing the history of K-pop because Theo had mentioned he wanted to work in the music industry.
Min even said it when she dropped them off at the bus station and gave Theo a shirt.
“If anyone asks who made it, tell them Threads by Moon, okay?”
“Min, this is amaz—”
“Threads by Moon, Theo! Don’t forget!” She drove off before he could balance all his loot.
As they were waiting for the bus, Dae disappeared and returned with a tote bag to hold it all.
“At least let me carry it,” Theo said, reaching as Dae held it behind his back, dodging out of his way, his chuckle lighting up every cell in Theo’s body.
“I said this was a full-service visit, and that includes carrying your absurd amount of freebies.”
“Fine, I’m not going to turn down being fully serviced.” Theo hadn’t thought about what those words would sound like before they came flying out of his mouth, and this time, both their cheeks went red. He could feel the flush crawling up his neck and into his hairline.
But strangely, Theo didn’t panic. He flirted with all his friends in some way or another. He and Dae had come to an agreement, hadn’t they? This kind of thing was safe again.
The bus ride back to Toronto was lighter than the way there had been; the two of them leaning in to whisper and giggle, sharing videos as they scrolled, nudging each other with elbows when things got too quiet.
Theo felt like he could jump out of the bus and fly beside it. This was it. This was the answer. They would stay exactly as they were, forever—no lines crossed, no disasters, no weird, tense distance. They were on the same page.
For the first time in a year, Theo could finally, finally breathe.