29. Cheot Sarang #2
Was he dreaming the whole thing? Never before had a man made him so crazy.
But what could he say: ‘I thought we were boyfriends now’?
He wasn’t a high school senior asking him to wear his letterman’s jacket.
And how was Dae so calm? How was he making breakfast every morning, kissing Theo on the cheek when he went to work, and texting him about the landlord coming by to fix the sink?
Theo wanted to tear his clothes off, shower him with compliments, and tell him how much he wanted him.
But he didn’t. Because Dae didn’t. And it was making him miserable.
“Here.” Dae slid him a plate topped with offensively healthy eggs and steamed vegetables.
Theo tried to move it away with the power of his mind. He’d never succeeded in using telekinesis, but that didn’t mean he should give up. “I do nothing but love you; why are you trying to hurt me?”
“Because your body needs vitamins.”
“I’ll tell you what my body needs.”
Dae shook his head, squashing his smile. “This is not a sexy conversation.”
Theo almost screamed.
“But it could be.” He struck a pose against the counter and took what had to be the most seductive bite anyone had ever taken from a bagel. Give me something, he silently begged him. Let me know I’m not alone in this.
Dae laughed and used the pad of his thumb to wipe the butter from his lips. For a single, unbelievably hot moment, Theo thought he would lick his thumb, but he didn’t. He used a dish towel to wipe his hands, then pushed the offending plate closer.
“I have to go to work. Dinner tonight?”
Theo nodded and watched him go. So movies and TV really had lied to him. Or maybe he and Dae wouldn’t get a honeymoon period. They’d known each other so long, maybe they were fated to slide right into the old married couple period, bickering about whose turn it was to clean their dentures.
Best Guitarist On Planet Earth
I’m at the Studio but No one’s here?
we said 11
Caleb was a wildly talented recording guitarist, but sweet lord he was a chore to manage. Avery was better, though one time she showed up to a recording with the wrong instrument, and Theo had never let her live it down.
whoops! I’ll kill some time then. Want Coffee?
hazelnut latte please
Want to go straight from recording to my place for the party tonight?
thats ok I’ll go with dae
Oh right haha Dumb question
Theo couldn’t be annoyed with Caleb, especially since he really did have a hazelnut latte waiting for him when he got to the studio. It didn’t take long to lay down his track. It never did. Caleb was scatterbrained outside of the studio, but once he got inside, he was shockingly able to lock in.
It had always been beautiful to watch him play—Theo had spent many long evenings losing himself to the notes leaping from Caleb’s guitar—but it was even better to see the artists’ reactions to hearing the music they wrote come alive.
Caleb had a way of adding an energy no one had even thought to ask for.
Theo was still riding the high of that energy when he got home, and it inspired him to get some work done: sending emails back and forth with Hannah Gardiner (he had never stopped using her full name, even after working with her for two years) and flagging some phrasing on new contracts.
The party that night would be a joint celebration for Caleb’s birthday and a housewarming, so it was possible that people Theo hadn’t seen in years would be there. And it would be his first official outing with his new…whatever and he and Dae were.
His confession had been embarrassingly public, but he wasn’t sure how far that gossip would’ve spread. He wanted to be able to tell people that they were…
His frustrated sigh propelled him into his room to pick out a perfect outfit, and by the time he heard the apartment door open, he’d found it: tight jeans and a wide-necked long-sleeved t-shirt that showed just enough collarbone to be flirty.
“You look nice,” Dae said, glancing up from his phone as Theo stepped out of his room.
Nice? He was wearing his tight jeans! He wanted Dae to have untoward thoughts, not think he looked nice.
“Twenty minutes, okay? I just need to clean up a bit.”
Theo nodded as Dae went into his room. It was fine. It had to be fine. He could live like this. So he had a different idea of what their relationship would be. That wasn’t the end of the world. He was in love with Dae, and he’d figure out a way to adapt to the reality of this romance.
And it was a romance, no matter how much doubt was now swirling in his gut.
So he called through Dae’s door, attempting to sound perfectly normal. “I still think we should’ve blown up the picture of us as Golden Girls and framed it.”
“There’s no way Caleb hasn’t already done that.”
That was a fair point. So, instead of getting Caleb the perfect gift, they instead left their apartment and rode the subway with a housewarming plant balancing on their knees.
Caleb and Avery’s new house was on the Danforth in a wholesome neighbourhood with parks, chalk drawings, and the honest-to-goodness smell of baked cookies wafting from a window.
“Why would twenty-somethings get a house in such a quaint neighbourhood?”
Dae shrugged. “I think they mentioned wanting to have kids soon.”
Oh right. Married couples did that sometimes. Would he and Dae get married? Did Dae want kids?
Theo mentally slapped himself across the face to snap out of it. They’d been together a week! What was he doing? He’d never thought about that kind of stuff with any other boyfriend. Shit, were they even boyfriends?
A chorus of hellos met them as they entered. A few people Theo hadn’t seen since university asked how he was after his near death experience, then smiled knowingly at Dae, which meant word had definitely gotten out about both the fire escape and his confession.
The house was great. It had real ‘starter home’ vibes, with hardwood floors and huge windows. A group huddled inside the small kitchen, their voices overlapping and their body heat making the windows fog.
“Theo!” Jason saw him first and gave him a long hug, rocking him back and forth. “How are you feeling? Man, that was so scary.”
“Nothing but an interesting story.” He nodded to Caleb over Jason’s shoulder. “The house is awesome. You’re a real domestic now.”
“Isn’t it great?” His grin was incandescent. “You want a drink?”
Before he could answer, Dae handed him a vodka soda. He wanted to put his arm around his waist, but Dae moved away to talk to Avery, which Theo fought hard not to take personally.
Despite his romantic insecurities, the party was fun. He caught up with people from school, and once the booze started flowing, an improvised dance floor in the living room became inevitable.
“I got permission from the neighbours!” Avery screamed, her face close, her shoulders shimmying. “Isn’t that great? The neighbours!”
“That’s awesome!” Theo had never seen anyone so excited to have neighbours before. Her joy was infectious. Who cared if his best-friend-maybe-boyfriend didn’t want to act like they were in a relationship? These were Theo’s people, and he was determined to have a riot of a time, dammit.
“Well, well, well.” Jacinda stood in the doorway, her eyes locked on Theo.
He hadn’t seen her in years, though they’d casually kept in touch over social media.
She looked so fucking cool: her curls had been cut into a short bob that framed her face and she wore a cropped leather jacket over a tight tank-top.
Theo wanted to run to her and scoop her up, but guilt held him back.
She crossed the room and threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“I heard,” she whispered, her cheek pressed to his. “I’m glad you finally found your spine.”
He pulled back, and she peered straight into him, perhaps recognizing something familiar there. “Oh, dear. Should I get the ice cream?”
“No, it’s fine.” She continued to stare and he allowed himself to sigh. “He’s just not acting very boyfriend-y.”
“Is it my turn to give you a pep talk about how much he likes you?” Her gentle caress of his cheek turned into a pinch, and then they were both laughing.
Theo had just enough alcohol in his system to say what he’d been too cowardly to admit for years. “I owe you an apology.”
She smirked, crossing her arms. “Here we go.”
“Okay, fine, I know you know what I’m going to say, but can you just let me do it anyway?”
She nodded. “Go on then.”
“I shouldn’t have interfered with your relationship so mu—”
“Sorry.” She put on a show of shaking her head and putting a cupped hand to her ear. “I can’t hear you over the music.”
He tried not to glare. “I should’ve known you’d make this impossible.”
She laughed, but leaned in to listen intently, not letting him off the hook. “You were saying?”
He took a deep breath and projected, not caring who might overhear. “I shouldn’t have interfered so much with your relationship. I was obviously scared of my own feelings and used you as a shield, which was a shitty thing to do.”
She just blinked at him, raising her eyebrows as if to say, and?
“It was unfair, and I know it caused you a lot of unnecessary heartache not to be absolutely cherished the way you deserve.” He was getting louder the more she stared at him. “You’re a goddess of pure delight, and because of me, you wasted time on a relationship that—”
“Okay, stop. I forgive you.” She laughed, covering his mouth with her hand before he could reach a proper scream. “And I didn’t waste time, Theo. Every relationship I’ve ever been in taught me something, and I don’t regret a moment of any of them.”
She rested her arms over his shoulders, and they began to slow-dance to the upbeat music.
“So,” Theo asked, “what did you learn from Dae?”
“To trust my own instincts.” Oof. He deserved the dramatic glare she gave him. But thankfully, it morphed into something softer. “Did Dae ever tell you why we broke up?”
“No.” And even after all these years, he was still dying to know.
She sighed, shaking her head. “Silly, silly boys. Ask him.”