26. Sienna
twenty-six
Sienna
My feet drag over the gravel of the fairgrounds parking lot as I walk behind my friends, my mind on the man that I just left.
Fuck, I should’ve stayed. I wanted to stay. To be with him, to let him take care of me. Instead, I’m semi listening to my cousin cry about kissing a guy who everyone knows she likes while my heart is somewhere else.
I’m silent on the ride back home, my mind replaying the moments prior. The chase, Jace wearing a Halloween mask, and then secretly taking my virginity in a public place.
After everything I’ve done today, I’m in dire need of some rest. I yawn as we file out of the car, heading up to the apartment. The girls are all chatting away, but my head is elsewhere as I walk beside Cleo.
I really fucked up this time. Leaving after a kiss is one thing, but running away after having sex ? I’m fucking doomed.
A gentle tug on my hoodie sleeves brings my focus back to the present as Cleo furrows her brows at me, frowning a bit.
“What’s up with—Is that a hickey ?!” she screeches, eyes wide as she points at my neck, drawing attention our way as Denver and Georgia gasp.
I mimic her expression as my jaw drops and I clutch my neck. Georgia and Denver halt in their steps, both gasping as they eye me.
“Oh my gosh! It’s from that hot dad isn’t it?!” Cleo exclaims, her hands flying to her mouth animatedly.
Hot dad? !
My jaw drops as nervous laughter bubbles from my throat. She couldn’t be further from the truth. Georgia eyes me over Cleo’s head, her face scrutinizing as I laugh off my cousin.
“Hot dad? Did you bump your head on the Mind Eraser, CJ? It’s a bruise.” I chuckle as she tilts her head, confused by my deflection. My stomach sinks as Georgia sighs, pursing her lips, clearly unimpressed with my avoidance.
When we get into our apartment, we each take our rightful spots on the couch and loveseat. Denver and Cleo talk animatedly about what happened at Fall Fest while Georgia plays a fashion game on her phone.
I need to text Jace, see if our relation—situationship, whatever this is—is still salvageable. I mean, if I were him, I’d be pissed. The woman who ditched him on a rooftop two years ago ditched him again after getting her way with him.
What is the female equivalent to a fuckboy? If there is one, I’m pretty sure my name is mixed in the definition.
I can feel eyes on me as I chew on my bottom lip, my fingers itching to get in contact with Jace.
Fuck it.
Jumping from my spot on the loveseat, I practically run to the front door of our apartment, snatching up my keys as I do so. I need to talk to him, to get him to understand just how sorry I am for leaving him.
Cleo’s up in an instant, her worried brown eyes searching my face, but I don’t give her any signs of how I’m feeling. The only person who needs to be taken care of right now is a blond asshole that I’m pretty sure may be the spawn of Hades.
“What’s going on, Si Si? Why do you look like someone just threatened Oscar?” She chuckles warily as I crack a watery smile, my heart stuttering as I lie to my best friend.
“Nothing, I-I just need some air.”
I don’t give Cleo the chance to respond as I leave the apartment, racing to my car in the parking lot. The sight of my light purple AMG GT 63 comes into view, but I stumble in my tracks at the car parked next to it.
A dark green Aston Martin SUV .
Jace’s car.
He leans casually against the hood, watching me, the picture of utter perfection. I don’t know what to do with myself, my hands squeezing and pulling at my fingers as I try to psych myself up to approach coolly.
But all of my carefully crafted nonchalance bursts as I catch his eye, and I fucking run to him, crushing him in a bear hug.
Jace is taken aback from the force of the hug, stumbling slightly as he wraps his arms around my waist, squeezing.
“I’m so sorry. I should’ve given you more, or at least tried to stay with you a little longer. Instead, I just ran and—”
“It’s okay,” he says softly, gripping me a little tighter as I sigh.
Jace is the kind of guy who puts everyone’s emotions and well-being above himself. He always has been, hence him doing the list with me. He’s selfless and attentive, albeit a little crazy when he wants to be. He means well, and that's all that matters.
I know that my actions hurt him, that he won’t tell me they did in order to spare my feelings, and I feel like shit a little bit more because of that fact.
“We should probably get in the car, wouldn't want anyone to see, right?” he says quietly, and a pang of guilt hits my heart as I chew my bottom lip.
“Right.”
In the car, neither of us speak. Jace sits staring out the car's windshield blankly and I sit next to him, watching him.
The silence between us is deafening and something I’ve never experienced with the man to the left of me.
I don’t like it.
“Do you want to come up? We can all hang out and talk like old times,” I try, preparing myself for him to reject me but Jace just sends a sweet smile my way, nodding.
He’s like a kid in a candy store as I lead him up to the apartment, talking and joking like normal. My body releases its tension as Jace cracks jokes about the guys and fills me in on what's been happening at practice lately .
When we approach the hall for my apartment, his hand gripping my wrist has me pausing in my steps. When I turn to face him, I gasp as he pulls me by the waist and kisses me.
“That’s not fair, I wasn’t ready” I say, a small smile peeking through as he chuckles.
“Life isn’t fair, Sienna.”
I narrow my eyes at him, turning to face him in front of the apartment door as he raises a brow at me. I point a finger at his chest.
“Be on your best behavior here, no longing gazes and no flirting,” I say, a hint of humor lacing my tone as he nods like a soldier, saluting me.
“Yes, ma’am. There will be zero funny business.”
Nodding my head, I smile.
“Goo—”
The asshole kisses my cheek, green eyes dazzling.
“Starting now.”
Everyone goes silent as we shuffle into the apartment, Jace striding in like he owns the place as I sigh, throwing on a fake annoyed tone.
“Look what the cat dragged in.” I roll my eyes as he chuckles behind me.
“Time to party, motherfuckers!” he jeers, raising his hands in the air like the king of the jungle as Cleo races up to hug him.
Dragging my feet to the couch, I plop down next to Georgia as she eyes me curiously.
“What happened to fresh air?” she quips quietly as I cut my eyes to her.
“He was already outside.” I shrug, licking my lips as Jace takes the loveseat.
I track his movements as he settles himself in the chair and my skin buzzes with a newfound energy as he spreads his legs widely, deepening himself in the cushion. Jace catches my obvious perusal of him and winks, smiling softly as Cleo offers him a donut from her stash.
He takes the donut carefully, eating it slowly, and my mouth waters at the sight of him.
What the hell is going on with me? And why do I find the sight of him eating a donut to be the most attractive thing in the world ?
Maybe it’s because of the hole?
Get a grip, Sienna…Oh my goodness.
“We should watch last night's race!” Denver claps excitedly, turning the TV to yesterday's Formula One race as Jace groans, the sound going straight to my…
nether regions. Memories of him groaning my name not even two hours ago plague my mind as I eye him from my peripheral, my mouth watering when something dawns on me.
In the few times that Jace and I have done anything remotely sexual, he’d been the one giving pleasure—not receiving. The thought of making Jace feel just as much pleasure that he’d given me makes my pulse race.
I’ve read countless romance books and the one thing that these books have taught me is the art of giving a good blowjob.
Or at least I hope that they have…
I mean how hard can it be to suck dick? (No pun intended.)
All I have to do is give him those eyes— fuck me eyes for those that don’t know—pull out his dick, and suck. Without using teeth . Seems pretty easy enough.
Now, I just need to find a way to get him to my room…I eye him momentarily as he talks with Denver and see my moment as she brings up being too short to do some things.
“Speaking of short, Jace, I need your help with getting some boxes in my closet. I’ve been trying to get them down, but uh…” I trail off as he crooks a brow at me as if to say really, is that how you’re going to try to get me out of my pants? and yes, that’s exactly how I’m going to do it.
Jace’s face is unreadable as he stands, wiping his hands on his thighs. “What would you do without me, shortcake ?” he teases, throwing a playful arm around my shoulder as I roll my eyes, swatting him away.
“Oh fuck off, I’m just using you for your height.”
Laughter trails behind me as I dramatically sashay to my room, Jace in tow. He says something that I can’t hear and Cleo’s loud cackle is the only thing that can be heard as I enter my bedroom and immediately freak the fuck out.
“Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God… ”
What the hell do I do now? I had the right idea, hell yeah I did, but now I don’t know what the fuck to do! Do I say something cute? Maybe make him laugh…or just immediately jump his bones.
Do people even say “jump his bones” anymore?
Fucking hell.
My heart drops, my throat feeling cottony as Jace enters the room. His hair is cute and rumpled from the hoodie he’s wearing, and that makes this all even worse as he softly shuts the door. When our eyes lock, my shoulders stiffen and Jace tilts his head like a confused puppy.
You got this! It’s just a…penis?
Letting out a deep breath, I roll my shoulders back and push him back—thinking the action would be sexy like how I’ve seen in porn. Instead, Jace hits the door with a loud thud and his eyes widen animatedly.
“Are y’all okay?” Georgia’s voice is loud and distant, drilling anxiety into my bones as I look up at the confused man in my room.
“We’re fine!” I shout back, putting a finger over my lips, signaling for Jace to be calm as I wrap my arms around his neck. In an instant, his hands find my waist and I melt into his touch.
Now's the time…you got this girl!
I psych myself up and do the only thing that I semi know how to do.
I drop to my knees right in front of him. Jace’s jaw drops like my knees as he gapes at me like a fish out of water.
“Wha…What are you doing?” he asks, gasping as I tug on the waist of his pants.
“What does it look like? I’m apologizing!” I whisper, gesturing for him to be quiet by putting my finger to my lips.
How does this go again? I just shimmy the pants down, right? Since this isn’t the Omegaverse books that I typically read, he shouldn’t be the size of Jupiter when I free him. Right? Fuck, I should’ve studied before doing this…What if he thinks I’m inexperienced—I mean, I am but… Fuck .
When I tug on his jeans, his hand clasps around my wrist, halting my movements. My breathing stutters as I look up. Jace’s face is a torrent of emotions as he looks down at me, jaw still dropped, and that’s when I see it… Fear .
This is a disaster.
“ No! No no no…Get up!” he says, not giving me the chance to do it myself as he hoists me to my feet.
“Huh…I just thought—”
Jace cups my face, cutting me off.
“No…Don’t ever feel the need to pleasure someone as an apology , Sienna. If someone ever makes you give them head as an apology, tell me and I’ll kill them myself.” He sighs, pulling me into him and my heart shatters.
Does he not want me? I just thought that would be something he would want…
“But at Fall Fest—”
Jace shakes his head.
“I was not going to let you give me a blow job at that place. The floor was more like a dirt road than concrete…” He chuckles softly, the vibrations of his laugh dancing on the top of my head as my shoulders slump.
“So, no head?” I ask, chuckling a bit as he pulls away to look at my face. The look in his eyes is sweet and playful before he kisses my forehead.
“No.” He laughs, squeezing me a little tighter.
When we pull away from one another, it feels like time has stopped.
His eyes, the perfect swirl of light and dark green are full of light, no disappointment or pity—just light.
The look he gives me is airy and sweet. Tension builds between us as neither of us backs down from our unintentional staring contest.
I break it, slapping a hand to his chest. “Don’t look at me like that, psycho. I’m starting to worry that you’re falling for me.”
My words are playful, but I can’t help the pit of longing that builds in my stomach as he grabs a hold of my wrist before intertwining our fingers.
“No need to worry,” he says cooly, but his eyes speak another language. Breathing deeply, I untangle myself from him and lift my head .
I've got to get a grip because even though he's saying he isn't falling for me. I can't guarantee that I haven't already fell for him.
“I think you should stay in Cleo’s room tonight—if you stay over that is…Wouldn’t want to let our little secret out, y’know.” I gulp, my eyes looking anywhere but his as he clears his throat, the sound awkward.
“Right…wouldn’t want to fuck up our arrangement .”
I flinch as Jace walks out of the room, leaving me with a confused and muddied heart.
I just fucked up… again .